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The Happier Tacos of Days Past

Posted on Wednesday, May 1st, 2024

Dave!Yesterday I spilled pizza sauce on my T-shirt and ended up doing a load of laundry for all my T-shirts. Today I spilled chocolate soy milk on my T-shirt... but since I didn't have any T-shirts left to wash, I washed it with my dress shirts. I don't know what I will spill on my T-shirt tomorrow, but whatever it is, that T-shirt is going to have to be washed with a load of denim. So I should probably plan on wearing a dark-colored T.

Ah to go back to the day before all this madness happened when I was just eating tacos and not spilling shit all over myself. It was a simpler time...

Tacos!

I guess from here on out I need to start wearing a bib or something.

Proving once again that life really does come full circle.

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Humanity Ain’t Over Yet

Posted on Thursday, May 2nd, 2024

Dave!Playing around with GeoSpy has revealed that AI isn't ready to take over the world yet.

This is an online app where you upload a photo and i will use AI to tell you where the photo was taken. It's been weirdly accurate on some photos that I wouldn't have thought would merit any results... but has also been even more weirdly inaccurate with photos that should have been a walk in the park.

As an example... I uploaded a photo of monks meditating in a Lao temple...

Monks Call to Prayer at a Temple in Luang Prabang, Laos

GeoSpy came back and said that it was taken in Chang Mai, Thailand. Which is not unreasonable, yet totally wrong.

BUT HERE'S THE THING... GeoSpy shows you the photos it found on the web that it used to determine the location. AND MOST OF THEM HAVE LUANG PRABANG LITERALLY IN THE TITLE!

Luang Prabang Everywhere

So it managed to find the correct photos of what I uploaded, but then completely ignored the actual location being spelled out for it? And in some cases the name of the actual temple is there. How can an AI bot be given ALL the information... the actual answer, in fact... but still come to the wrong conclusion? Weird.

Guess humanity has a few more good years left after all.

   

Star Wars at 47

Posted on Friday, May 3rd, 2024

Dave!My obsession with Star Wars is approaching 50 years (in 2027). The original film is a defining childhood experience for me, and I've been reading the books and comics, watching the movies and shows, and playing the games ever since.

Being a Star Wars fan can be a frustrating ordeal because there has been so much shit shoveled on top of the franchise over the years. But even so, my love of it all triumphs, and I can never get enough of the stuff. Tomorrow being "Star Wars Day" means that I will spend a good chunk of it revisiting things. This year I've decided it will be the five chronological films running from Solo through Return of the Jedi. I had already watched the sequel trilogy back in March. If there's time tomorrow, I will watch the good moments from the prequel trilogy as well (that'll take about 15 minutes).

I also decided to revisit my Star Wars movie ranking chart. But there really wasn't a need, because only one film really needs to be moved...

My Star Wars Scale which Ranks all the Movies

   
And here's a new run-down of my thoughts on all the movies above...

Solo: A Star Wars Story When I first saw the film, I thrilled to see Daniel Glover's exceptional take on Lando Calrissian... but not much else. The story was too convoluted and was, for the most part, unnecessary for Star Wars as a whole. Yeah, we get to see some of the throwaway stuff from the earlier films, but did we really need to see it? But over the years my opinion has changed. I was able to appreciate it as just a fun story that happened to be in the Star Wars universe as opposed to judging it solely as a Star Wars movie. There's some really cool action sequences and interesting ideas which make it a worthwhile addition to the franchise.

Rogue One: A Star Wars Story Given the mess that went on behind the scenes, it's a miracle that this movie worked as well as it did. Lucasfilm/Disney wasn't thrilled with what Gareth Edwards had done and brought in Tony Gilroy to rework it. Entire sequences were added, deleted, and changed. The result is not without problems, but it's a great film and incredible Star Wars. The Battle of Scarif... both on the ground and in the space above... is peak Star Wars for me. Every time I see the movie I go running to YouTube to find the fan edits which focus only on the space battle to disable the shield gate. Amazing, amazing stuff. As if that weren't all enough, you get to see the ultimate Darth Vader sequence and a poignant ending which was a huge punch to the gut that sent Star Wars in a direction that made it something... more.

Star Wars IV: A New Hope The movie that melted my brain as a kid doesn't really hold up in several areas, but is still a landmark movie that I love to an irrational degree. After rebelling against the Special Edition forever, I mostly watch that version now because cleaning up the special effects is just too important to ignore. I am still hoping that one day a version of the film which only cleans up the special effects of the original cut is released in 4K... jettisoning the stupid shit like Greedo firing first and Han meeting with Jabba. That's the dream. I don't for the life of me understand why Disney just doesn't fucking do it already. No need to respect George Lucas's wishes after he's talked shit about them... so just give everybody what they want.

Star Wars V: The Empire Strikes Back The greatest Star Wars movie in existence by a wide margin, Empire was a serious take on sci-fi fantasy that Irvin Kershner managed to complete before George Lucas fucked up the franchise by making it about selling kiddie toys instead of being about Star Wars. Leigh Brackett and Lawrence Kasdan took Lucas's story idea and made it a mature, smart, nuanced screenplay that worked so beautifully that you got a serious taste of exactly what Star Wars could and should be. Easily in my top five movies of all time, this is what I think about when I think about Star Wars.

Star Wars VI: Return of the Jedi Here we go. The first step in George Lucas utterly shitting on everything Star Wars which came before. It's all about kiddie toys now, which is why we get nonsensical teddy bear Ewoks and other unnecessary character additions... plus a long slide into stupid shit like burp and fart jokes. I'm assuming all the coolest stuff... like the final battle between Luke and Anakin, and that epic space battle... were all thanks to Lawrence Kasdan's effort to make something Star Wars fans would actually want to watch, but who knows? While I still love this film simply because it's Star Wars and completes the trilogy, I also loathe it for how it took an unfuckable franchise and so thoroughly fucks it up. All because George Lucas had an agreement to keep all the money from the toy sales, and he wanted money instead of good movies. Which brings us to...

TIME PERMITTING, THESE PREQUEL SCENES...

Duel of the Fates from Star Wars I: The Phantom Menace Look, I'm just going to come out and say it... the prequel trilogy fucking sucks. Stupid, boring ideas revolving around political shenanigans. Groan-inducing, horrific dialogue. Pathological abuse of green-screen. Catastrophic avoidance of practical effects. These are bad fan films, not Star Wars. That being said, there are moments that you love to see. The battle between Qui-Gon Jinn, Obi-Wan Kenobi, and Darth Maul is fun to watch, so instead of torturing myself by watching the entire movie, I usually fast-forward through Anakin's insufferable journey (YIPEEEE!!) and, God help us, Jar Jar Binks, so I can just watch the moments that don't suck. Of which there are precious few.

Bounty Hunter Chase and Yoda vs. Dooku from Star Wars II: Attack of the Clones Everything that sucked about Phantom Menace is in full effect here. Plus... they sabotaged both Padmé and Obi-Wan by making them plain stupid. For the longest time I put a lot of my loathing for this film on Hayden Christensen's crappy, whiny Anakin Skywalker... but after seeing his subsequent appearances in the Obi-Wan and Ahsoka series, it's VERY clear that it wasn't his acting ability that was lacking... it was the shitty script he had to work with. That being said, that thrilling bounty hunter chase after the attempt on Padmé's life through the skies of Coruscant... and that amazing (and unexpected) fight between Yoda and Dooku... both were =chef's kiss=. This movie is filled with so much "if only" that it's almost criminal. The biggest being that we finally had an opportunity to see the Jedi at the height of their power and abilities in the Battle of Geonosis... only to get this massive wet fart of a "fight" which was just Jedi using "force push" a lot and waving their lightsabers in the most boring fucking way possible. I was expecting to see Jedi antics that made it vividly clear why they were so feared and respected. What I got was literally the opposite of that. Boring.

Palpatine Rescue from Star Wars III: Revenge of the Sith Despite an abundance of stupid shit and bad ideas, I regularly rank Sith above Jedi because at least the burp and fart jokes were on the decline here. And that opening where Obi-Wan and Anakin rescue Palpatine in the middle of a massive space battle was almost too good to be true. Everything after that was a bit of a mess. Sure we got that infamous fight between Obi-Wan and Anakin, and there was also Yoda vs. Palpatine, but by that point it was really too late to save this movie, which ultimately added nothing we needed to see to the Star Wars story.

WATCHED ALREADY BACK IN MARCH...

Star Wars VII: The Force Awakens The sequel trilogy actually got off to a fairly good start despite some major missteps and too many retread moments from the original trilogy. I liked Rey quite a bit. I loved BB-8. Starkiller Base was a nice escalation of the Death Star. The action sequences weren't spectacular, but were fun to watch. This wasn't a great movie, but it was a good one that I enjoyed. I just wish it were smarter, as too many things about it were weak.

Star Wars VIII: The Last Jedi It's just... why? Rian Johnson is a very capable writer and director. He had a golden opportunity to do something interesting with Star Wars. But this is what we got? This? With the exception of that wonderful sequence where Holdo uses hyperspace as a weapon, the only things I remember from the film are all bad. Poe's child-like defiance. Kylo and Rey's horribly-choreographed battle in the throne room. Luke Skywalker being wasted then discarded for nothing. That stupid-ass casino heist nonsense on Canto Bight. Snoke being thrown out like garbage as if he wasn't originally orchestrated as this massive threat. And, worst of all, stupid fucking SPACE LEIA?!? And then... then... that final sequence with the little boy and the broom completely tossing everything we know about Jedi training in the trash. It's all just so awful.

Star Wars IX: The Rise of Skywalker While this was an improvement over the previous flick, it still wasn't a very good movie. The whole MacGuffin chase for the Sith Wayfinder nonsense made for a mediocre plot. Palpatine's return and revelation that he's Rey's grandpa were plain stupid (assumably since Snoke got killed off last film, this was the best they could do for a villain?). The death and return of three separate characters (Chewbacca, C-3PO, and Rey... and an argument could be made to toss Palpatine, Leia, and Luke in that mix) made it look as if J.J. Abrams didn't have any ideas left. In the end too many moments were fan service instead of story service. Plus there's the relative simplicity that the whole evil plot is wrapped up (not to mention the stupid way it was accomplished), and this was a relatively anticlimactic end to an anticlimactic trilogy that didn't really give us much new to justify it happening in the first place.

   
And that's that for my big Star Wars plans. At some point I really want to re-read some of the best Star Wars books (starting with the Thrawn Trilogy). I definitely want to rewatch the incredible Andor first season before the second season arrives (seriously, if that show were a movie, it would rank right up there with Rogue One for how incredible it is. I think I'd also like to run through the LEGO Star Wars games.

In any event, May the 4th be with you.

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Caturday 354

Posted on Saturday, May 4th, 2024

Dave!After my last girlfriend and I split, I texted her to tell her that she left her memory foam pillow. She told me it was a cheap one that she didn't really like so I could keep it or toss it. I remember thinking AHAAAA! It wasn't that we didn't have common interests that broke us up... it was this stupid pillow!"

I made a mental note to toss it because I had my Ghost Pillow, but it sat there on her side of the bed for weeks (making it more of a ghost pillow than my actual Ghost Pillow) because I didn't have to change the pillowcase.

It's a GHOST PILLOW! OOOOOOOH!

Then at some point Jenny started laying on it, so then I couldn't toss it. Instead I had to start changing the pillowcase again.

On Wednesday when I was making my weekly linens change, I decided to remove the pillow and put it in the cat's room. No sense constantly reminding myself that the only relationship in my life is my cats.

Well, I'm sure you know what happened next.

That night when I went up to bed, Jenny charged ahead like she usually does. After brushing my teeth, I went into my bedroom and... saw that Jenny was laying on my pillow. Because of course she was.

And so now her pillow is back on my bed so

Some ghosts can't be busted, I guess.

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Bullet Sunday 854

Posted on Sunday, May 5th, 2024

Dave!I'm in full-on construction mode here in my home, but have no fear... because an all new Bullet Sunday starts... now...

   
• Shield Gate! Yesterday I mentioned that every time I watch Rogue One: A Star Wars Story I go running to the internet to watch the super-cut of all the space battles because they're just so cool and amazing to look at. And here you go...

You're welcome! Dang pushing the Star Destroyer into the Shield Gate was brilliant fun.

   
• Acolyte! The big news out of yesterday was that Star Wars gave us a peek at new Star Wars on Star Wars Day...

Looks darn good! But I'm so used to being shown the best bits of the show in the trailer, then finding out that it's nothing like what they showed us. So I guess we'll see.

   
• Mazes Got Nuthin' on This! I fell down a rabbit hole of videos of crows being geniuses. Then octopi. And then... rats?!?

Rats driving a car. Who knew?

   
• Dementia Village! The dementia care home I found for my mom wasn't a sterile, boring, hospital-like place. It looked more like a home with different textures and colors and interesting things to look at... other patients to visit with. Her room was likewise nothing like a hospital room, and could be filled with all her stuff so it felt familiar. The hallways was in a big loop so she couldn't get lost. For what it was, I thought it was quite nice. The only thing missing was a way for her to wander outside and look around. And idea which was has been explored by this Dutch facility, which is incredible...

As happy as I was with the facility I found for my mom, I would have been thrilled if she could have stayed in a place like this. So much more friendly. I really hope these "dementia villages" catch on.

   
• Hulk Smash! The Incredible Hulk Coaster at Universal Studios Islands of Adventure Orlando is hands-down my favorite rollercoaster. I rode it the year it debuted, then rode it plenty more times over the years (one visit to the park I rode it five times!). This video talks about the coaster, and I've skipped past all the non-Hulk-Coaster crap at the beginning...

I did ride it after the refurbishment, and was impressed. They kept the classic coaster everybody loves... just made the experience better from start to finish. No other coaster I've ridden since has compared to it. Not bad for a coaster 25 years old!

   
• AI FAIL! I had the same thing to say about both the Humane AI Pin and the Rabbit R1: "Once Apple & Google unleash AI assistants on their phones, all these additional gadgets are toast." But this was before either of these devices were released to horrific reviews. They're useless. Snazzy Labs has a great overview of both devices at the same time so you only have to watch one video...

The Humane AI Pin was fucking useless on paper and is worse than useless in practice. I was a little more bullish about the Rabbit R1 because it at least had a screen to interact with stuff and sounded like it had a better service. But it turns out that it's worse than useless too. Which is to say that Apple & Google are winning before they've even released anything. How boring.

   
• Fuck This Fucking Fuck! I gotta say... watching puppy-killing piece of shit Kristi Noem getting dragged from one end of the internet to the other is the best thing ever. She murders animals not because she needs food or is in danger... but because she just fucking loves to kill (surrendering your "problem" puppy to an animal shelter means you can't kill it, so she must love it)...

I hope her political career is truly toast, because a sadistic fuck like this has no business holding any political office. If she thrills to kill a fucking puppy... can you imagine what she would do to make lives harder for people she doesn't like? And now she's blaming all her lies and bullshit on her ghost-writer. Which is hilarious given that SHE NARRATED HER OWN AUDIOBOOK AND KNEW FULL WELL WHAT IT CONTAINED! That happened after she fucking lied about staring down Kim Jong Un. Jesus what a dipshit asshole.

   
And now back to construction, already in progress.

   

It’s Looking Super

Posted on Monday, May 6th, 2024

Dave!Okay... okay...

James Gunn is out here teasing us with this epic shot promoting the upcoming Superman movie. It's just so... brilliant. Just another mundane day for Superman having to go save the world! I haven't been this excited about a DC movie in over a decade...

Seriously. The last DC movies that were worth a shit was Wonder Woman in 2017 and The Suicide Squad in 2021. I wasn't looking forward to Wonder Woman because I thought it was an extension of the shitty, dark, joyless shit that Zack Snyder had been crapping out of his ass. It took me completely by surprise when it actually ended up being a decent flick.

Here's hoping.

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Once Again Into The Sonos Shitshow

Posted on Tuesday, May 7th, 2024

Dave!Just when I think that I couldn't hate Sonos more than I already do... they unleash this new shitty fucking app that's somehow even shittier than their previous shitty fucking app.

Why in the hell can't they hire a UI designer who actually knows how to craft a useable UI? Because I've only been using this heinous blight on all humanity for two hours and I've found so much wrong as to make me wonder what the fuck they're even doing.

  • Does the widget at the bottom reflect what's actually being played? Fuck no. It shows the song you first selected, then never updates again. So far as I can tell, there's no way to see what's actually playing. Unless you stop, select a new track, then play that (oh... turns out you can update the widget... all you have to do is FORCE QUIT THE APP AND RELOAD IT! Then the widget will update from what's playing. So handy!).
  • Can you arrange your favorites? Fuck no. Pin your favorites? Fuck no. You even have to dump the fuck OUT of your favorites to even get to where your playlists are at (unless it happens to somehow be one of the ten things that can be displayed on your home screen. Can you fucking imagine having to load something you don't want to get to something you need? Who the fuck thought that was the best way to arrange any of this? There's no configuring ANYTHING.
  • Are items in your favorites handy to use? Fuck no. I have songs on there that I tap to play... AND NOTHING FUCKING HAPPENS! Some songs will play. Some won't. Is there any way of finding out why that is? Of course there fucking isn't.
  • But surely the interface for controlling your music is easy to use since that's the whole fucking point of the app? Fuck no. Half the time when you click on a song for info or whatever, it will start playing even though that wasn't your intent. But there's no ellipsis to click on (...) so you assume that you click to interact with it... except that doesn't work, and you've just fucked everything up for nothing.
  • But alarms? Fuck no. But sleep timer? Fuck no.
  • And did they finally give us a useable search? Fuck no. Search is ungodly slow (EVERYTHING IS UNGODLY SLOW! Wait for your playlist to load. Wait for your songs to display. Wait for the next batch to load as you scroll. And wait to load. And wait to load. And wait to load). Even worse, you can't make the blanket search results default to your service of choice. If you want to only search Apple Music every time? TOUGH FUCKING SHIT! You either have to select the service first, then search... or you get to search EVERYWHERE EVERY TIME... then wait for the app to go non-responsive while it searches for shit on services you DON'T WANT... then you can select Apple Music (or whatever). NOTE TO SONOS: I don't want to listen to Sonos Radio EVER! How do I erase your fucking radio shit off my list?? Can I even do that? I can sure as fuck remove EVERY OTHER SERVICE.... why not yours? Does anybody even use it? Do you think shoving it the fuck down people's throats will make them want to use it?
  • But surely it's easy to do simple shit like add a song you find to a playlist? Fuck no. I don't even think it's possible to add a song you searched for to a playlist. At least not that I can find. I have to go to the desktop app to do that (even though Sonos is discontinuing it... who the fuck knows what you do after the desktop app is gone).
  • Can you at least inject music into your queue by clicking "play next?" Fuck no. You can't do FUCKING SHIT to your queue. You can't add songs... rearrange songs... remove songs... NOTHING!!
  • Using this app begs the question... is there an upper limit to how many fucking layers of sheets you can pile up? Just curious, because absolutely everything you do generates a new sheet, and you have to swipe down on EVERY FUCKING ONE OF THEM to get back home. Click on the widget to get more info, new sheet... click on the queue, new sheet... click on a track to get info, new sheet... this app has more fucking sheets than a fucking klan rally. And when you want to go back? SWIPE TO CLOSE! SWIPE TO CLOSE! SWIPE TO CLOSE! SWIPE TO CLOSE! Jesus Christ, just give us a fucking home button for God's sake.
  • Apple has had Dynamic Island on iPhone for a minute. But does Sonos use it so you have a convenient way to get to your speakers or interact with what's playing? OH FUCK NO! OF COURSE THEY FUCKING DON'T! Haven't you been paying attention? If there's a smart UI decision, Sonos actively avoids it like the fucking plague.

I'm dying to know: Does ANYBODY at Sonos actually listen to fucking music using this piece of shit? Who would want this? Pathetic. Fucking pathetic. After waiting YEARS to get an app update that's worth a shit... then getting this fucking disaster... I'm ready to throw all my Sonos gear in the front yard, douse it with gasoline, and light the fuckers up. I'd rather listen to music on a fucking iPod mini than suffer through this idiot shitshow any longer. It's just fucking inconceivable that this is where Sonos is at. Will they fix all the shit that's broken, unclear, and missing? Maybe. But shouldn't they have beta tested the app before releasing it? Well, it's Sonos. It took them a fucking YEAR to release a fix for the Pop of Death on the Arc soundbar, and I'm still not convinced that it's totally fixed because I am still having problems. So you do the math. Shake that Magic 8-Ball and the answer always seems to be "Not fucking likely."

If you're thinking of buying Sonos gear, you should take a fucking pass. A hard pass. If things keep going like this, they're not going to be around much longer anyway.

UPDATES!

Before I get to some more thoughts about this shit... can I just give a shoutout to all the people saying "Relax, it's version 1 and things will get fixed" and "Relax, it works just fine for me!" Fuck you. There are BASIC FUNCTIONS THAT ARE SERIOUSLY BROKEN OR MISSING! If I had the option of downgrading to the old app, then I'd say "Well that was bad!" and be able to relax. But I can't. And goody for you if it works for you... that doesn't fucking negate the problems that everybody else is having. Take several seats and be happy that your whole system didn't go down and all the basic features other people use are something you don't give a shit about.

But anyway...

On the Sonos site they have a feature list which shows all kinds of options you get when you click on a track...

ALL THE OPTIONS ARE THERE!

But what do I get? Save to favorites (which may or may not play when clicked on) and replace the entire fucking queue. That's it...

NOTHING IS THERE!

I can only guess that all those other basic features aren't working, and rather than getting it all fixed before release, Sonos decided to shove out an incomplete fucking app with no way to go back to the old app which, while shitty, allowed all of this.

One of the biggest complaints by others is that they can no longer see music on their local network storage. Support for this has been dropped completely. This is nonsensical in all kinds of ways, but fortunately I get around it by having Plex manage my media, and Plex is actually showing up and working (despite having a red exclamation point in the button with absolutely no explanation). Sonos's response seems to be "Don't you even stream, bro?" which has left a great many users thrilled, as you can imagine.

A minor annoyance... whenever I go to System Settings, I fly into a panic because I think a bunch of my gear has gone missing from the system. My room will show "Stereo Pair" which is normal because there's two speakers joined into a stereo pair there. But my living room will show "Arc" and that's it. It used to be "Arc + Surrounds + Sub" or something like that. I wish that they would go back to that. With so many people losing equipment out of the app, I'd really prefer not to get assaulted with this incomplete info.

When you opened up the Sonos app away from your home network in the past, you'd get a message that said something like "Searching for your Sonos network." Now, this doesn't happen. Assumably because Sonos is all about internet connectivity for some reason. And that would be fine... except it doesn't reflect the current state of your devices back home. According to the widget, Karma by Taylor Swift is playing in my bedroom. The little bouncing equalizer icon is bouncing... and I am given the option to pause what's being played. Except nothing is actually being played. Which is why this whole internet connectivity fiasco is so fucking ridiculous. It appears that EVERYTHING goes out on the internet, even when you're at home. That's why it takes forever for shit to load. And why when you scroll through your queue it has to keep pausing and loading... pausing and loading... pausing and loading. I suppose that Sonos could justify this huge fucking waste of time if they could point to the app and say "SURE IT'S SLOW! BUT YOU CAN CONTROL YOUR SYSTEM FROM ANYWHERE IN THE WORLD!" Except you can't. It gives wrong information and none of the controls even work.

To actually control your system remotely, you have to use the internet and login at http://play.sonos.com. This will be the only option available on desktop computers once Sonos kills the desktop apps, so you'd think that the web app would be fucking killer, right? Yeah... you'd think that. Except the web app is just as fucking useless and broken as the phone app. It is equally slow with a lot of waiting around for things to load. Even if you're sitting in the same fucking room as your speaker, since the controls have to go out onto the internet, visit the Sonos servers, then come back to you. No option for local network control. But it gets worse. Remember how I was mentioning that search on the iPhone app if fucking abhorrent? Somehow the web app is even worse. At least in the iPhone app you can select the service you want to search. But if you select a service in the web app, there's no search bar on the service sheet. You are forced to use the universal search bar to search all services (including Sonos fucking Radio that they won't let you fucking delete no matter how badly you want to)...

NO SEARCH FOR YOU!

It's been well-established that I fucking loathe Sonos and don't recommend their bullshit... even if you find their gear on clearance. At least right now. But there's a few things that Sonos can do which would at least make things tolerable...

  • Bring back the old app until you can get a workable new app. That should be a fucking given... especially when your initial release is missing a shitload of features and half the stuff is broken... but since it's not a given, you need to give people the option of reinstating the old version ASAP.
  • Keep your shitty new UI with its endless sheets and incomprehensible navigation if you must, but have it stay on the local network instead of going out on the internet. There's no benefit to this. Nobody wants to have their bedroom speaker play the Macarena while they're across the country or on the other side of the planet. Not only is it fucking stupid, it slows everything down to an absolute crawl. The app is unbearable to use it's so fucking slow.
  • Even better? HIRE A FUCKING TALENTED UI/UX DESIGNER WHO KNOWS HOW TO DESIGN A FUCKING APP! Jesus. This should be app creation 101. And you'd think it would be given how people railed you for the shitty design of your old app! But here's the thing... as bad as it was, I find myself longing for the old app. Sure it was a mess, but it was fast and reliable. And that's more important than how it works. By a longshot.
  • Stop sitting on shit endlessly. You took fucking forever to develop a new app (such as it is). You took fucking forever to fix the Pop of Death in the Arc. You took fucking forever to adopt HDMI. You take fucking forever for EVERYTHING! Companies who can't be responsive really don't have much hope long-term. Other companies invade your space while people wait. Better options come while people wait. You can't afford to laze around as you always have. Which is to say... FIX THIS FUCKING APP AND ALL ITS FUCKING BUGS AND ALL ITS FUCKING PROBLEMS NOW!! NOT NEXT MONTH... NOT A YEAR FROM TODAY... FUCKING NOW! And don't blame us because it's become so urgent. Had you not released a buggy pile of shit with no downgrade path, you could have taken all the time you needed. But now? Well... it's all on you.

But given Sonos's history, I am holding out zero hope that anything gets resolved quickly... if at all. They have long since stopped giving a fuck about their products, their reputation, and their customers.

   

Ahmad Hamdan Is Remembered

Posted on Wednesday, May 8th, 2024
It's surprising how often I think about Ahmad Hamdan.

He was trapped in a region of non-stop war in Syria, but did his best to help people and feed cats in the area. And died there after joking about having dug his own grave.

It's a good thing I'm not God. Because I'm telling you right now, there would be no hiding from my wrath. Nothing could save you. I would wipe all violent aggressors off the face of the fucking earth without so much as a thought. One minute you're killing innocent civilians and cats... then next minute you would find yourself transported to the surface of the sun.

Which kinda begs the question... where is God in the middle of things like this anyway?

Good-looking dude needs Botox BAD!

Definitely not in Syria, that's for sure.

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Netflix Road to… Profitability?

Posted on Thursday, May 9th, 2024

Dave!Saving money now-a-days is a necessity for most people. Sadly this has resulted in my losing some entertainment options I used to enjoy, but I have much better use for the money. To add insult to injury, it can be tough to decide what you're going to cut.

Fortunately, some businesses are making my tough decisions for me. Like Netflix!

Right now I am on an ad-free "Basic" plan with Netflix. It's highly limited... just 720p quality and can only stream on one device at a time... but I hang onto it because I fucking detest ads... plus I like a lot of what Netflix has available. No, I don't think that I am getting $11.99 worth of value from it, but I don't cancel because there's no way to ever get "Basic" back again...

But, alas, Netflix is saying that the "Basic" plan is going to be killed off once and for all sometime soon. At which point I'll have a choice to make...

  • STANDARD WITH ADS: $6.99/MONTH - Absolutely no fucking way I'll watch fucking ads from these fucking assholes that made me happy to not have ads in the first place.
  • STANDARD: $15.99/MONTH - If I don't feel that I'm getting value out of an $11.99 price... $15.99 is out of the question. Even if it's at 1080p quality and can be used on two devices.
  • PREMIUM: $22.99/MONTH - BWAH HA HA HA HAAAAA!
  • TELLING NETFLIX TO KISS MY FUCKING ASS: $0.00/MONTH - Sad, but I do love the price...

So let's do the math. Currently Netflix gets $144 a year out of me. Far more than I want to pay, but it is what it is. But after "Basic" is removed? They will get $32 a year at most. I'll buy a month once or twice a year and call it good. Which is to say that Netflix is going to lose $112 a year. Stupid as fuck of them. But ads are so profitable, right?

I guess I should be thanking Netflix, because I could use that extra $112 annually.

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The Dogwood is Dogwooding Again

Posted on Friday, May 10th, 2024

Dave!There's a dogwood tree in my front yard. It's been here since I bought the place and I've tried my best to take good care of it. From what I can tell, it's thriving, because I've been careful to make sure it gets food and adequate water. Most of the time, however, it's not a great-looking tree. Better than nothing, but not what I would have picked to look at out my front window.

Except for one week in the Spring when it's in bloom...

Good-looking dude needs Botox BAD!

For that tiny window, it's a glorous sight to behold. Stunning, really.

Except it never lasts. One day it's in full-bloom, then a couple days later all the petals are falling off at a rapid clip and soon it will be back to its normal self. At least it will still have leaves for a while. Because after the leaves are gone as well, it's back to something bordering on depressing to look at.

I am choosing not to dwell on that, however, because yesterday the repairs on my home were completed... after six years! No more holes in walls and ceilings. And, as God is my witness, there will be no more furniture and other junk scattered around the house after this weekend. I don't care if it kills me, I'm moving everything back to where it belongs, and hanging all the pictures back up on the walls, and scrubbing all the construction dust from walls, floors, and furniture. I am done with my home looking like an episode of Hoarders gone wrong.

And then it's time to start work on the many projects I've got left to do now that I can actually do them.

Last weekend I rebuilt my coat closet so that I can have the Litter-Robot in the bottom while still hanging coats up above it with a protective barrier. I even managed to fit a small shelf above the closet rod, which was something I didn't know if I would be able to do. It ain't much, but it's enough space to put a basket of gloves, scarves, and other seasonal crap that need a place to go when I'm not using them. Not surprisingly, I did a far, far better job with my construction than the original builders did. I took the time to do it right, even though it's just a closet that nobody will look at. This wasn't easy because the door opening is askew and the walls are bowing in and out. It was like trying to build in a funhouse room of mirrors. But after warping board with a steamer, making sure all the screws were recessed and filled, and coming up with something that looked level despite that being impossible... I have something I'm very happy with.

Next weekend I'll start building the access panel covers and other stuff that's been a long time coming.

Who knows... by Winter I may just have a house that looks like a home.

   

Caturday 355

Posted on Saturday, May 11th, 2024

Dave!Jenny is getting to be more of a problem with food than Jake ever was. If Jake is slow to his bowl when the food drops, Jenny will eat hers... then his. It's so bad that I get up and call Jake over so he gets to eat. But this week there's been a new wrinkle. When Jenny sees that Jake is finally coming, she will stop eating her food... then go to his bowl to eat because there's more food there. Jake gets whatever she didn't get around to eating. I can't even be mad because that's a pro move right there. But there's going to come a time when she's too smart for her own good... and I'm not sure how I'm going to handle that.

Also? My cats have started talking. Quite a lot. If Jenny thinks I'm taking too long brushing my teeth and she want me in bed so she can get petted? Meows. So many meows. Jake can't meow, but he whines and frets and squeaks and wails. ZOMG the wailing. This past week I just walked in the door and he comes running up to be petted. I have to sit a bunch of stuff on the counter first, so I walk by him. He exploded with wailing. You'd think that I kicked him. In the face! Then... once I have my hands free and start giving him a rub-down? All the squeaks.

Jake and Jenny next to me on my bed.

Cats only get more nuts with age. What will they be like in five years?

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Bullet Sunday 855

Posted on Sunday, May 12th, 2024

Dave!I'm building build building this weekend, but I haven't forgot about you, dear reader... because an all new Bullet Sunday starts... now...

   
• DestructiPad! Apple introduced their amazing new iPads in the worst way possible. To illustrate how this miracle device is capable of a huge number of creative endeavors, from music to art to research, they released a commercial where a massive hydraulic press squishes musical instruments, art supplies, and other physical tools into nothingness. And they let you see the destruction in excruciating, closeup detail...

Apple Destroying Tradtional Tools

Now, I get what they were trying to do... but holy shit. Who thought this ad which celebrates the death of physical creativity would be a good idea? The first thing I thought was "Do they not speak with foreign culture consultants before releasing their ads?" Because the first thing I thought of was... there are cultures where creative tools are revered, and destroying them like this is an unforgivable act. And, sure enough, the outrage was immediate. Particularly from Japan, where something like this is unforgivable. But it should anger anybody who thinks this kind of waste is senseless. Apple ultimately apologized, but it is crazy to me that they were so stupid as to do this in the first place. They could have animated it... or used cardboard cut-out representations... or anything where the actual objects weren't destroyed.

   
• MaxiPad! Tone-deaf commercial aside, the new iPads are incredble. The display, the power, the larger size, the new stylus... it's a digital creator's dram come true. I don't use my iPad enough to justify buying a new one (I have a 2020 iPad Pro), but was curious to know how much my ideal iPad configuration with accessories would cost. It's $2000... not including AppleCare. But no worries... Apple will give me $65 to trade in my old iPad Pro! Yikes. I'll just wait for the MacBook Pro M4, thanks.

   
• Exit! Okay. Dang. Sometimes short films have more impact per second than a multi-million dollar flick...

This brilliantly illustrates how a film doesn't necessarily have to take its time and build up characters into fully-realized people in order to be entertaining. Sure traditional long-form movies are my preferred way to experience a story, but running into something like this shows that it's not the only way to tell a story. If you haven't seen it yet, be sure to check out my last short film pick, Two Strangers Meet Five Times.

   
• THERE IT IS! And... scene...

Here's the thing: I have never had a desire to wear nail polish. It's never been my thing, even when I was into cultures where it was a part. But seeing all these snowflakes getting so triggered by FUCKING NAIL POLISH makes me actually want to start wearing it. The idea that guys can't accessorize their appearance without being trashed by the toxic masculinity brigade is absurd. Why the fuck are people so invested in what other people are doing with their appearance? Let them do them and you do you. It's not that hard to ignore shit that makes others happy that you wouldn't do for yourself.

   
• EXIT SLOW! Ah yes. The Union Street exit in Seattle. I have taken it many times. And have seen people nearly lose control many times. Never seen a crash... but I believe they happen often because of how it's designed. Some guy set up a camera to catch accidents of cars taking the exit too fast, and they do indeed happen often...

You'd think that people driving in an area that they are unfmiliar with would be following all suggested speed signs rather than ignoring them. Odds are, there's a reason that they tell you to slow way down.

   
• More Runner! One of my most favorite films of all time is Blade Runner 2049. It shocks me to this day that it wasn't a massive blockbuster success. This is the film that genius-director Denis Villeneuve made before his celebrated Dune films, and it's equally phenomenal. This week it was annonced that Amazon Prime Video is making a sequel series... WITH MICHELLE FUCKING YEOH!!! I gotta tell you, I have no idea when Blade Runner 2099 is going to happen, but I am already looking forward to seeing it. If it's even half as good as 2049, it will be well worth the wait.

   
• NEWSFLASH: Ted Cruz Called Automatic Airline Refunds a ‘Dumb Idea.’ Senators Disagreed. Do you think that if Ted Cruz blows enough airline executives he can take his next Cancún vacation for free? The refund is not immediate-immediate. It's only if your flight has been significantly delayed and you don't rebook another flight to replace it. The only thing this changes is that you don't have to fill out a bunch of paperwork and let the airline string your along forever... or issue you some stupid credit that you'll never use before it expires. Where the fuck does this boot-licker asshole come up with this outrageous shit? Do people even believe his ridiculous crap anymore? Ted Cruz is a fucking embarrassment, and the fact that he still has a job shocks the shit out of me. Republicans don't think that they deserve to get their money back with a minimum of inconvenience when they get fucked over by over-bookings or maintenance failures or whatever? Get real.

   
And now back to hammering...

   

First Project of the Year Complete!

Posted on Monday, May 13th, 2024

Dave!Coat closet remodel complete.

I needed a place to put the Litter-Robot that was out of the living/dining area and could also be hidden away when company comes over.

I have a cat door I bought to install in the closet door, but I think I'm going to skip it. Jake & Jenny would probably feel safer not being trapped in a small place when they do their business. I'll just leave the door open until company comes over because it doesn't bother me and isn't in the way...

My new closet with room for a litter box in the bottom.

If I do ever end up installing the cat door, the barrier between the Litter-Robot and the coats slides forward and has a soft plastic edge that seals against the door when it's closed in case the cats unload a stinker before the Litter Robot cycles...

Door sweep seal.

It's also removable so I can clean more easily.

Even though I raised the hanger bar quite a lot, I still had room for a small shelf to store baskets for hats and gloves and stuff when I don't need them...

Secret shelf above my coats.

I'm happy with how everything turned out. And the build quality is so much better than what was there. I actually gave a crap about how things looked even though it's just a closet that nobody is going to spend time looking at.

On to the next project.

   

I’m a Pirate Now!

Posted on Tuesday, May 14th, 2024

Dave!   
Yo ho, yo ho, a pirate's life for me...


   
Hopefully a temporary pirate, but you never know.

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You Can Clock It On An Egg Timer

Posted on Wednesday, May 15th, 2024

Dave!Harrison Butker, a kicker for the Kansas City Chiefs, delivered a commencement speech at Benedictine College this past Saturday. He's a hardcore regressive Catholic. Benedictine College is a Catholic college. So it should shock absolutely nobody that Butker unleashed a grotesque missive that was steeped in everything from misogyny, antisemitism, and homophobic bigotry to COVID misinformation, toxic masculinity, and general hatred of anybody who dares to not share his "values." He also decided to take a jab Taylor Swift (who's regarded as nothing more than "a teammate's girlfriend"), for which I can only hope that her boyfriend kicks him in the fucking dick.

No, people shouldn't have been at all shocked. And yet shock people he did.

Do I think it was crass that this asshole would stand up in front of young women who have worked long and hard to graduate from college only to tell them that until they are wives and mothers their lives don't mean shit and their entire purpose is to be barefoot and pregnant? Of course I do. But what did everybody think that he was going to say? That's Christian female gender roles in a nutshell.

Do I think it was disgusting that he would take jabs at the LGBTQ community with his "deadly sin pride" bullshit and prop up toxic masculinity by telling men to fight against ideas and people he doesn't consider culturally "masculine" enough? Absolutely. Gotta be an alpha-male for Jesus!

And am I even remotely surprised that it's now being brought to light that Butker hooked up with a male cheerleader at Georgia Tech when he went there? Oh fuck no. That's the easiest thing to believe out of any of this. History has shown us again and again that the harder a homophobic bigot attacks the LGBTQ community, the more skeletons they have in their own rainbow-painted closet. They're always compensating for something...

UPDATE: And of course TikTok removes the video. Butker can drone on with his homophobic, misogynistic, antisemitic bullshit no problem... but anybody dare to retort to that and it's REMOVED FOR BULLYING TIME! Well, the internet is forever, so if your browser can support video embeds...

The minute Harrison Butker came for the gays, it was only a matter of time until we found out why. I'm just surprised it took this long. Usually you can clock the tea on an egg timer.

Oh well. Here's hoping that Harrison Butker gets the life he deserves.

Which of course includes Travis Kelce kicking him in the fucking dick.

   

Web of Stupidity

Posted on Thursday, May 16th, 2024

Dave!"Madame Web is spectacular. A triumph of the human spirit and a film which redeems super-hero movies for all eternity. No greater achievement in artistic expression will ever come to pass, and I’m rendered awestruck that such a cinematic masterpiece exists within my lifetime. Oscar glory awaits. Now streaming, only on Netflix!" —David Simmer II, Blogography

Look, I'm not here to pile on the absolute fucking disaster that is Madame Web because plenty of professional movie reviewers have taken care of that.

Except I am, because when you release utter shit in the comic book genre, then you oversaturate the market and fuck up people's confidence in comic book movies which might actually be worth a shit (see: every shitty Zack Snyder DC Comics movie ever).

But anyway... Madame Web...

From what I can tell, this is loosely based on the Spider-Man comic book saga The Grim Hunt where Kraven the Hunter's family starts hunting the various spider-characters of the Marvel Universe because their blood will resurrect Kraven (who had died earlier in the series. Or something like that. It's been over a decade since I read them.

Except instead of Kraven's family it's a different Marvel character, Ezekiel, who's hunting spider-people. And instead of wanting to resurrect Kraven, he wants to kill the spider-people because he's convinced they will kill him. The changes make sense because the Kraven movie hasn't come out yet and the film doesn't have Spider-Man in it. The comic book story is also where Madame Web dies (spoiler alert), but whatever.

But anyway... Madame Web...

In the comic books she's an old lady who's blind and paralyzed from a disease, but can see the future. She's kept alive by a network of tubes that resembles a spider's web...

Arguably one of the stupidest fucking heroes ever, she was shoe-horned into the Spider-Man Universe with a sledgehammer. Which is apt because Sony Pictures intended to shoe-horn this stupid fucking movie into the Marvel Cinematic Universe for no other reason that they own the motion picture rights to the Spider-Man characters. And they want to cash in on the fact that their deal with Marvel to put Spider-Man in the MCU has been incredibly lucrative. How they thought they would make money with a character that absolutely nobody gives a shit about is beyond me. And this film comes after the hilarious flop that was Morbius, which makes Sony look even more idiotic. And just you wait... Kraven is coming on December 13th!

But anyway... Madame Web...

The film is about a woman named Cassie Webb whose mother was shot by the evil Ezekiel in Costa Rica as she looked for a magical spider. He wanted the magic spider she found, and killed her for it. In an attempt to save her life, a mysterious group of spider-people let one of these magical spiders bite her to give her super-powers. But it's too late. She dies, Cassie is born, and she grows up to find out the magical spider that bit her mom gives her the ability to see the future. Meanwhile, Ezekiel and his precognitive abilities foresees that three girls will eventually get spider-powers and be responsible for his death. So he sets out to kill them first. Cassie sets out to same them. Totally unoriginal and boring super-hero antics ensue.

This movie is horrendous. Nothing makes sense. Major plot points could have easily been circumnavigated with even ten seconds of thought. And you could tell that they were jerking the story around from start to finish because there's a lot of inserted dialogue which is painfully fucking obvious. Whether this is studio interference or incompetence is anybody's guess. All I do know is that, with the exception of a few action sequences that aren't half bad, the movie is an ungodly mess that should have never been made.

It's just more garbage being inserted into the comic book movie genre that nobody wants or asks for.

   

Fast Food: Sadder Than Ever

Posted on Friday, May 17th, 2024

Dave!Deciding to treat yourself is something that's increasingly difficult to afford. But after the bad week I had been having, I decided to stop at McDonald's on my way home yesterday for a couple breakfast biscuits (hey, I'll eat vegan at home).

But instead of the delicious fluffy biscuit I've come to expect, I got a tough, chewy, mockery of a biscuit that was (literally) hard to swallow...

It's like COME ON. Why would you serve an overcooked, shitty biscuit like this? Especially when you're charging a butt-load of money for the privilege of buying one? It's as if restaurants are all too happy to serve crap food and make unhappy customers if it saves them 10¢ to just cook another biscuit. Well, lesson learned. McDonald's doesn't care about serving food worth buying, so I guess I won't.

And then there's this...

@bellatvnetwork Chipotle walkouts people walking out before order is complete if portion is small and Keith lee reviewed Chipotle portions @NoahGlennCarter #chipotle #keithlee #food #restaurant #burrito #burritobowl #funny #foodreview #foryou ♬ A mysterious scene of the near future like Blade Runner(994826) - The Structures

Keith Lee is the hero we need right now.

I stopped eating at Chipotle Mexican Grill a couple years ago for exactly this reason. Don’t keep raising prices only to give me less food. And, yes, I know that it's the individual restaurant franchise which sets portion amounts. But if enough people refuse to put up with it and enough people stop eating there, then Chipotle Corporate is going to have to do something.

So now I’m taking a pass on Chipotle for crap portions and McDonald's because I’m tired of getting stale fries and tough biscuits. That's on top of other restaurants that I gave up on long ago like Quizno's and Johnny Rockets. The only fast food I’m eating now is Burger King for their incredible Impossible Whopper (and onion rings)... and Wendy's for everything they offer that’s vegetarian-friendly, because it’s always fresh and tasty (PERFECT FRIES AND BISCUITS EVERY TIME!).

I’m happy that people are done with being taken advantage of by fast-food restaurants that are no longer worth it. Maybe they’ll get the message and stop expecting people to pay for their bullshit.

   

Caturday 356

Posted on Saturday, May 18th, 2024

Dave!I'm visually-impaired this week, so naturally that's when my cats decide they want to be problematic.

Jake, who hasn't been dragging his toys around to create toy gauntlets for months, has all of a sudden started to do that again. Almost as if he knows I will have a tough time seeing them... and will possibly trip on them, fall down the stairs, and die...

A toy gauntlet down the hallway leading to the stairs.

And, yep, Jake has been caught on video, so there's no defending him...

This past week was a banner catio week because the weather has been warming up. The only problem is the wind, which doesn't seem to bother Jake. He just digs his claws in and braces for impact...

Jake bracing against the wind out in the catio.

Jenny, however, will come running back inside if it gets too windy. She would much rather lounge on the couch getting pets than be uncomfortable...

Adorable Jenny getting petted on the couch.

But don't get the impression that Jenny is any less weird than her brother. Lately she's been sitting on her tail, which is not only puzzling to me... but to her brother as well...

Jenny sitting with her tail between her legs.

Though it's probably unwise to refer to my cats as "weird." All cats are weird. It's what makes them cats.

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Bullet Sunday 856

Posted on Sunday, May 19th, 2024

Dave!My vision may be at half-capacity today, but that's no excuse to give up... because an all new Bullet Sunday starts... now...

   
• Sweet Like Sugar! Apple TV+ has a new series called Sugar. It's a detective series that's something more, but it takes its time to get there. Don't watch the trailer. Don't Google it. Don't allow it to be spoiled for you. Just watch it...

Sugar Poster.

Colin Farrell is compelling in everything he does. Even when the movie is mid, he makes it worth watching just to see what he does with it. I mean, he took a throwaway character in Horrible Bosses and made it memorable! He was the best thing about Daredevil! He made you forget about Tom Cruise in Minority Report! He stole the entire film of Saving Mr. Banks... and that had Tom Hanks and Emma Thompson! The new Apple TV+ series Sugar is yet another stellar role for him. It's a stylistically great series with performances worth seeing.

   
• Tuck! Not Jake Gyllenhaal looking like he couldn't dress himself with his dopey "French tucked" sloppy shirt on Saturday Night Live last night...

Jake with his stupid-ass French tuck on SNL.

May Queer Eye's Tan France burn in hell for all eternity for popularizing such a stupid fashion trend. I cannot believe a gay man would get behind this mess. If I ever realize that I'm fabulous enough to be a drag queen, I'm going to call myself "French Tuck" because that sounds more like an amazing drag queen than a way to dress...

Me dressed as drag queen French Tuck.

Werk. Yeah, how hard would I slay on Ru Paul's Drag Race? Mary, I would serve lewks that other queens could only dream of!

   
• Anjin-San! It's been announced that FX/Hulu is going to continue the story of Shōgun with a season... two AND THREE!

Shogun Promo Image.

I hope that they manage to live up to the quality of the Clavell novel, because the first season adapted the entirety of the book. It's in the hands of others now. — AND WHERE IS OUR "NOBLE HOUSE" ADAPTATION, HULU?!? Holy crap would I love a faithful adaptation of that book with enough episodes to do justice to the complixities of it all.

   
• Congrats! DJ Qualls and his Supernatural cast mate Ty Olsson announced their engagement. And it’s like "Well that’s nice"...

DJ Qualls and Ty Olsson
Photos by Diyah Pera/The CW

I mean, seriously...

@justkelli0 Werewolf and Vampire marriage #jensenackles #deanwinchester #jaredpadalecki #samwinchester #djqualls #Tyolson #fyp #foryou #spn #celebrity #entertainment #spnfamily #meme #dad #actor #singer #supernatural #love ♬ original sound - Justkelli0

It is nice. Until you get into the comments and people who don’t know them and have zero investment in their relationship are taking time out of their busy lives to shit all over them. It’s unreal. Olsson, who has been married twice (to women) and has two children, seems to be the bigger target... apparently because he’s been married twice (to women) and has two children. Fortunately, kind and supportive comments seem to be the majority, but the fact that so many assholes just have to weigh in with their hate speaks volumes. Is it really so hard to just be happy that other people are happy? Or, at the very least, just keep your shitty comments to yourself?

   
• ZIP! I don't know how many people here would be interested in this... but it's actually a fun story whether you care about tech or not. Most of us can relate to a co-worker trying to sabotage us, and it's always hilarious when it backfires...

Sometimes the right thing happens... despite shitty people trying their best to make it otherwise.

   
• Consequences! If you watch one video on the whole Harrison Butker clown show, let it be this one. Nails it...

@nbcsboston

Trenni Casey shares her thoughts on Kansas City Chiefs kicker Harrison Butker's controversial commencement speech

♬ original sound - NBC Sports Boston

We're all tired. And I'm done with him and his hate. Unless he does something even more shitty, this is the last word on his bullshit for me.

   
• Baby Roo! So we can end this on a happy note today, here's this...

Okay, maybe one more...

I live for stuff like this.

   
And now... time for a nap.

   

It’s dangerous to have heroes…

Posted on Monday, May 20th, 2024

Dave!While I was at my most visually-challenged last week, it was tough to watch TV or use the computer for extended periods. What time I was able to manage was usually devoted to working, because my job doesn't stop just because I'm hurt. Non-visually, I listened to audio books. Another activity was something that I generally loathe... talking on the phone.

One call I had was with the brother of an ex that I still keep in touch with. Since me and his sister parted on great terms, it's all good. I've been to a couple Red Sox games with him when I was in Boston, and we chat about the team from time to time. They're running about 50/50 wins/losses and, after commiserating over another loss to the Rays, our talk turned to happier times... namely the 2013 World Series Champions that once was.

The BoSox winning the World Series in 2004 is one of the happier moments of my life, but it's the 2013 team that became my heroes. Ortiz, Pedroia, Bucholz, Lester, Napoli, Gomes... everybody... so many great players, and I loved them all.

And then there's Jarrod Saltalamacchia.

Saltalamacchia Dugout Jacket

I was a huge, huge, massively huge fan of Salty. His whole style of play was great to watch, and it was fun to be a fan of a guy who was kinda under the radar while more famous players were getting all the attention. I wore his jerseys and shirts... and ended up with a signed ball and photo... and even won a bid on one of his warm-up jackets from the World Series...

Saltalamacchia Dugout Jacket

   
I loved the 2013 Red Sox, and Salty was a big part of why.

Then, three years later after he had left the Sox, Saltalamacchia hit the news because of his hot-take on Colin Kaepernick taking a knee to protest systemic injustices against Black Persons and Persons of Color in this country. Saltalamacchia called this act... which was suggested by a veteran as a respectful form of protest... "disgusting" and had the absolute gall to tell Kap that he "...needs to go back to the history books and realize what that flag represents and what a lot of people have sacrificed for it."

My God.

I remember being absolutely baffled at this statement. I still am. A white man telling a Black man to go back to the history books? Did Salty ever pick up a history book? If he had, he'd know that slavery exists in American history... segregation exists in American history... the civil rights movement exists in American history... redlining exists in American history... a massive laundry list of social injustices against Persons of Color exists in American history! And while I know that a lot of our history has been (and continues to be) whitewashed, I cannot fathom how anybody could be so deranged as to tell a Black man to "go back to the history books." There was a time that you couldn't be Black and play at the highest levels of America's national pastime of baseball. Apparently not only should Salty pick up a history book, but he should visit the Negro Leagues Baseball Museum in Kansas City and see exactly what American history had in store for Black players of the day. Was he friends with Big Papi and other Black players in the Sox? If he was, did it ever occur to him that if he was playing in the 1930's that it would have been impossible for them to have been his teammates?

Yes. Brave soldiers have fought and died under our flag. But ultimately it's a piece of cloth. A symbolic piece of cloth to be sure, but a piece of cloth nonetheless. And here's the thing about symbols... they are open to interpretation. Salty may see the American flag and have a John Wayne movie playing in his head, but when Colin Kaepernick saw the American flag, he saw oppression, injustice, and violence against his people. At which time he did THE MOST FUCKING AMERICAN THING YOU CAN DO... enacted his FREEDOM to peacefully protest.

Interesting to note... in the year of 1960 when The United States of America's star spangled banner received it's 50th star (and became the flag that we're still flying today), four Black college students sat at the Greensboro Woolworth's "whites only" lunch counter to protest the segregation which restricted Black persons from existing in some public places. How can you be Black in America and not equate the two? In the year our current flag was born, there were places you couldn't be Black and eat at a lunch counter. That really needs to be fully understood by all Americans... but there are crusty old racist white politicians who are doing whatever they can to keep it out of our "education" system, so here we are.

The Greensboro Four at the lunch counter at Woolworth's.

   
The following year in 2017, Saltalamacchia gave an interview where he commented on a bunch of New England Patriots declining to visit the Trump White House after their Super Bowl win. He said that if he wasn't otherwise occupied, he would have likely skipped visiting the White House after his World Series win... "It would have been tough just because of my thoughts on Obama and his belief system. I feel like he did a lot of things completely opposite of what this country believes in. I just think he didn’t do a lot for our veterans. That’s my beliefs. I’m sure those Patriots players are doing what their beliefs are. I understand it, and that’s what is so great about our country, the freedom to make that choice.”

I fully agree with this sentiment. We do have the freedom to make our choice. That's what brave American soldiers have fought and died to defend. And Salty's "read a history book" comment to Colin Kaepernick was a perplexing, tone-deaf, sad, and overall wrong choice. Regardless of whether or not you agree with an American's right to peacefully protest the National Anthem and the American flag, the audacity here was off the charts. Why Salty couldn't have said something like "I disagree with what Kaepernick is doing... but he's doing what his beliefs are, and that's his freedom to make that choice" is something I will never understand. That would have been more in line with what he was saying about skipping White House visits, so I dunno. Saltalamacchia is a huge law enforcement supporter and his grandfather was a local sheriff. He admirably raises money for the families of fallen officers. And while he acknowledges that not all officers are honorable, he likely felt Kap's statements about police violence against Persons of Color was an attack on the law enforcement he believes in. And I get that. But that's not an excuse for what was said. How could it be?

As a quick aside here... While I agree that President Obama didn't do enough for veterans (seriously, no president has), I will say that apparently he did enough that President Trump decided to take credit for it. And if you want a quick run-down of the many things that Obama did for veterans even as Republicans were trying to take things away from them, here's a letter by Ben Lofton which lays it out for you.

But anyway...

It's dangerous to have heroes. Because heroes are only human and humans can let you down.

I still love Jarrod Saltalamacchia. He was my hero during the BoSox run to a World Series win, he was a source of great joy at a difficult time for me, and the fact that he said something awful that I vehemently oppose doesn't change what he meant to me at that time. I can no more remove Salty from the 2013 Red Sox than I can stop rooting for the Red Sox.

Maybe in the future he'll do something so unforgivable that I won't be able to reconcile it with being a fan (like shooting a puppy Kristi-Noem-style), but Lord I hope not. This sick sad world is just too damn awful to have to cut out people, places, and moments that brought you even a sliver of happiness.

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Missed Opportunities

Posted on Tuesday, May 21st, 2024

Dave!I've mentioned more than a few times here, I try really hard to not have regrets in life (okay, I've probably mentioned it several times... give me a break, I've been blogging for over 20 years!). It's just not worth it to pine away over something you did or didn't do, something you said or didn't say, or somewhere you went or didn't go. Just be happy with what you got out of this life and not worry about the rest. It happened. Or didn't. What more can you do without the ability to travel in time?

That being said...

This is not to say that there aren't things I wish could have happened or not happen for one reason or another. Missed opportunities, if you will.

As an example... I really wish I had visited the Aspen Hard Rock Cafe when it was open. It would have been so easy to do. So easy that I kept putting it off so I could hit the more difficult ones in foreign countries. But then the cafe closed with little warning and my plan to visit every US cafe evaporated. That really sucked. It haunted me for years. Now-a-days, when I've pretty much given up on visiting Hard Rock properties, it's like... meh.

As another example... I really wish that I had visited the infamous "Star Wars Hotel" (AKA Star Wars: Galactic Starcruiser) at Walt Disney World in Florida. I'm a huge Star Wars nerd, and the immersive properties of the hotel seemed like something I would have enjoyed. But it was ungodly expensive, and I just couldn't afford it. My plan was to wait until the newness wore off and the price would (hopefully) drop a bit when Disney needed to draw in more visitors.

Except rather than lower the price when they weren't getting enough visitors, Disney CLOSED THE HOTEL! I was bummed. Just like the Aspen Hard Rock, I had missed my opportunity forever.

And then I saw this video by one of my favorite YouTubers, Jenny Nicholson, detailing her totally fucked and busted experience at the doomed attraction. It's four hours, but time well-spent...

Holy shit!

Thank God I didn't have thousands of dollars to throw away on this awful experience. Knowing my luck, I'd end up with a worse stay than Jenny, and it's not like Disney is going to give you your money back if they failed to accomplish what they promise. At least I assume that's the case. If you go to one of their theme parks and an attraction you were dying to ride is broken down, you don't get part of your ticket price back. Unless you're an influencer with huge social media reach, apparently.

So, yeah, absolutely no regrets when it comes to Star Wars: Galactic Starcruiser.

As it should be.

   

Dolly’s Southern Sweets Doughnuts

Posted on Wednesday, May 22nd, 2024

Dave!There's no Krispy Kreme anywhere near me. Which is probably a good thing, because their "doughnuts" are pure sugar, and I don't need to be eating that.

But I was in Seattle yesterday for eye surgery and there's a Krispy Kreme on the way home... AND DOLLY PARTON HAS A COLLABORATION WITH THEM FOR A COLLECTION OF FOUR EXCLUSIVE NEW FLAVORS!! If you don't think I'm stopping by for a half-dozen to support Dolly Parton, then you don't know me at all...

Ad for Krispy Kreme's Dolly's Donuts!

Once I walked inside, I saw that Dolly's Southern Sweets Doughnut Collection was displayed together on the top row in a place of honor...

Krispy Kreme showing off Dolly's Donuts!

I wanted a half-dozen, so I got two each of the ones that I thought I'd like best (Spoiler Alert: my guesses for favorites were correct). Look at how pretty...

Dolly's Donuts from Krispy Kreme!

Here they are, in order of preference...

  • #1: Peachy Keen Cobbler Doughnut. This one isn't drenched in that absurdly sweet Krispy Kreme glaze before they add everything, and it makes a huge difference. It's a solid donut with peach filling that's dipped in brown sugar glaze with a crunchy cobbler topping. It's fantastic. The peach flavor really shines through, and that topping helps cut the sweetness so it's not making your teeth shake quite as much.
  • #2 Chocolate Crème Pie. Had they not drenched it in glaze, it would have been better... but it's still darn good. They swirl chocolate brownie and vanilla cream on top and sprinkle with cookie crumbles. The chocolate/vanilla hit is substantial, so you're not overwhelmed by the glaze underneath.
  • #3 Banana Puddin’ Pie. This is another unglazed donut filled with banana pudding that's got Nilla Wafer crumbs in it. They then frost the top, add frosting swirls to make signature Dolly butterfly wings, then add crushed Nilla Wafers to make the butterfly body. The banana tastes a touch artificial, which is the only drawback for me (other than the fact that whomever decorated my donut used too big of a frosting tip to pipe the wings).
  • #4 Dolly Dazzler Doughnut. Ungodly sweet. There was no reason to glaze this thing before frosting with strawberry icing, but they did it anyway. The sparkling sugar crystals were icing on the icing on the cake, which just made a too sweet thing even sweeter. AND THEN... as if this thing wasn't too much sugar already, they added a white chocolate butterfly on top (which was a bit waxy, but my favorite part of the donut). The strawberry flavor was good though, and I would definitely have liked it better without the glaze base.

But anyway... a triumph. Could have been better if they'd just stop with the glaze already, but I was very happy with them. If you've got a Krispy Kreme in your area then it's definitely worth stopping by.

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From Blackhawks to Beach to Kraken

Posted on Wednesday, May 22nd, 2024

Dave!Kapgar left a comment on Monday's entry which reminded me of something that always puts my stomach in a knot: The Chicago Blackhawks sexual assault scandal.

Kyle Beach was on my radar when he came up to the practice squad in the Blackhawks because I saw that he had played in Spokane (which is across the basin from me in Washington State). He never made it to any NHL play, so I lost track of him fairly quickly, but I absolutely knew of him back then.

A decade later in 2021 he came forward as a victim of sexual assault at the hands of a coach during his time with the team. He was 20 years old at the time. When the news broke I was still a diehard Blackhawks fan, because the Kraken had only just started playing and I wasn't invested with the team yet.

I will never forget hearing Beach's interview about his assault at the hands of coach Bradley Aldrich. It was so incredibly painful to watch him break down as he talked about feeling so utterly alone and afraid as he had to endure ridicule by his teammates. Even worse, he was told by the organization that what happened was his fault, which means he got no support from the staff who essentially called him a liar.

The interview was heartbreaking, but incredibly important...

That hurt me to watch back then. A lot. In some ways it hurts more now, because the entire scandal irrevocably changed my relationship with my favorite hockey team.

Seeing how horrifically this was handled by the Blackhawks and Beach's teammates soured me on them instantly.

Indeed, it was directly responsible for me becoming a fan of the Seattle Kraken, where I could start anew with my love of hockey. That they are my local team just made it all the easier. I've never left the Blackhawks behind completely, but it's seriously tough to follow the team when Kyle Beach is still fresh in my mind. My Blackhawks jersey still hangs in my closet, where it's been ever since. I think the only way I'd wear Blackhawks gear again would be if I got a customized Beach jersey...

DAVETOON: Lil' Dave in a Blackhawks Jersey

Because I'm just going to say it: Beach is a fucking hero for coming forward and advocating for change. Nobody deserves what he went through, and I wish every single man everywhere could see this so they understand that assault can happen to anybody, and our toxic masculinity culture means that nothing and nobody will save you. Instead you get dismissed, called a liar, and ridiculed. This isn't the way it should be, and things have got to change.

Lucky for all of us these assaults are finally being dragged kicking and screaming into the public eye. And we have heroes like Kyle Beach to thank for it. He says that he received a lot of support after speaking out. I sure hope that's true because he deserves nothing less.

   

Looking Forward

Posted on Thursday, May 23rd, 2024

Dave!The trailers for Beverly Hills Cop: Axel Foley and Beetlejuice Beetlejuice dropped today!

I tell you what, it's so nice to have something to look forward to. There has been a real dearth of good genre entertainment lately (Madame Web!), and I'm ready.

This movie looks exactly like what I'd want it to look like...

As does this one...

I have massive expectations for more Deadpool...

And then there's the new Cap movie coming...

And don't forget about Acolyte, which will be here in a few weeks...

Looks like the most Jedi thing to ever come out of Star Wars. FINALLY we might get to see the full potential of what a group of Jedi is capable of. Something I thought we'd get in Attack of the Clones when they teased The First Battle of Geonosis. But nope! Sure we got Mace Windu being all badass and cool with his Jedi acrobatics. But that's it. All the Jedi in the background are just indiscriminately waving their lightsabers around and using "Force Push" against a bunch of robots while firmly planted. It was fucking embarrassing. I've plaed LEGO Star Wars video games that were more exciting. Why not have all of the Jedi leaping around and being badass cool instead of this nonsense...

Jedi Kit Fisto doing a stupid-ass Jedi Force Push instead of actually doing anything cool in a fight.

Kit Fisto deserved better. And Star Wars fans definitely did.

But anyway... nice to have something to look forward to.

UPDATE: And now this...

Wake Up Dead Man: A Knives Out Mystery

I'm excited about this, even though it's delaying a new season of Poker Face. But that logo... ACK!! Not centered up correctly because they did it mathematically instead of visually. Hopefully the movie will be better than that!

   

Art Al Fresco

Posted on Friday, May 24th, 2024

Dave!Apple's release of their new iPads got me to wondering about how much the Adobe apps have approved over the past three years. I had bought a 2020 iPad Pro because I heard that useable versions of Illustrator and Photoshop were out for iPad (or coming soon to iPad... I can't remember). But then found out that they weren't really in a state that I could use them to do actual work. They were but a shadow of the full program. It was a bummer, but I had something fun to play with during pandemic lockdowns, so it was all good.

Turns out that the apps have improved dramatically. Not only can I open and edit full-on Illustrator and Photoshop files, the feature set is rich enough that I can do real work on it. So that's nice. But it's not the most impressive thing I've discovered after ignoring my iPad for years.

That would be an app called "Adobe Fresco" which is around 4 years old now.

Meant to compete head-to-head with "Procreate," it's a drawing and painting program that's darn good. It has a different approach in some areas, and is a vast improvement in others (particularly with their animation tools and "live brushes"). It's matured a lot in the past few years...

And so... looks like I'll be taking a closer look at that this holiday weekend.

Though, call me old fashioned, but I will always prefer physical media over digital drawing tools. There's just something about getting your hands dirty that makes art seem more "real" to me.

   

Caturday 357

Posted on Saturday, May 25th, 2024

Dave!The fact that my cats are such a small percentage of my size and yet occupy a far greater percentage of my bed is an irony that's not lost on me. And do you think that they care even a little bit that I have to struggle to find a place to sleep? The answer will not shock you. It's no.

Take this show from last night, for example...

My cats taking all my bed from me.

Now, lest you think that the square-ish lump is my legs folded up, it's not. That's a pillow that Jenny was propped up against that I couldn't move or else she'd get mad (seen in green below). No, I'm barely on the bed at all, with my legs almost falling off (seen in red below)...

My cats taking all my bed from me.

Now, the good news is that Jenny rarely wants to stick around after I go to bed. The minute I close my laptop and turn the lights off, she's running downstairs to sleep who-knows-where. So once she's gone I could move the pillow and move my legs on the other side of Jake where I have a little more room. He will be in that exact same spot when I wake up in the morning. At which time he'll let me know he's hungry.

Cats have got to be the most narcissistic creatures on the planet (after humans, of course). The world really is all about them. And when it's not, they make it that way.

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Bullet Sunday 857

Posted on Sunday, May 26th, 2024

Dave!I'm deep into home improvement projects, but don't despair... because an all new Bullet Sunday starts... now...

   
• Read a Book! Two excellent documentaries A Beatles doc on The Beach Boys (Disney+) which was very good, but had a horrible sound mix. The music is blasting... sometimes over the dialogue. And then there's the Reading Rainbow doc (Netflix) which is perfect...

Well worth your time. Especially if you're familiar with the program. I remember it would play in the lounge at college even though it was meant for kids. But it was not dumbed-down entertainment, so it was watchable for everybody.

   
• Sixty-Nine, Dude!! So there I was, ready to turn in for the night this past Tuesday when I saw a bright light flickering out my window. At first I thought it was just a plane because the light looked red. But it never moved, so I pulled out the StarWalk 2 app on my phone and found out it was a comet named 13P/Olbers which comes around every 69 years. It won't be here again until 2094, so I hope you saw it while you had a chance...

A bright light out my window!

StarWalk 2: The comet 13P/Olbers!

Sweet! Really makes me wish I had a telescope!

   
• Beautiful Cabin Crew Scarlett Johansson! When powerful people want something and you won't give it to them, then they just take it. Doesn't matter if that power comes from money... or people who are controlling a powerful force in our lives like A.I... what's yours is theirs. In the case of Scarlett Johansson, OpenAI. took her voice after she told them she didn't want to work with them. Hope with all your might that powerful people don't want something you have.

   
• I'm Good, Thanks! Sonos released the news that their new "Ace" headphones will release on June 5. And it's like they honestly think I would buy their shit? I couldn't use Dolby Atmos on my Sonos soundbar because it took years for them to fix the "pop of death" that plagued it. YEARS! Their interim solution was to "turn Atmos off" WHEN THAT'S THE ENTIRE REASON I BOUGHT IT! Between that and their shitty fucking app that makes using their gear a horrendous ordeal (I am filled with rage every time I have to scroll through a playlist because it keeps pausing to load), there's zero fucking chance I'd spend $450 on a pair of their fucking headphones. It's weird to think that Sonos was once the pinnacle of audio equipment with incredible features you just had to have (considering you could afford it), but now I honestly don't care if they flame out and shut down.

   
• Smell That Freedom! France has released a stamp that smells like baguettes! Nifty. BUT ALL 'MURICAN STAMPS SMELL LIKE FREEDOM! U-S-A-! U-S-A-! U-S-A-! U-S-A-! U-S-A-! U-S-A-! U-S-A-! U-S-A-!

Except I still want some of those baguette stamps. Who wouldn't?

   
• Enter The Sandman: Part Two! I have been anxiously awaiting to see who gets cast as the remaining Endless for the second season of The Sandman, and here they are...

Perfect. But I am still waiting for an adaptation of Death: The High Cost of Living. I don't understand why it's not been announced. It would be relatively cheap to produce. Just write a check for a fraction of the money you gave to Zack Snyder to crap the Rebel Moon movies out of his ass and call it good.

   
• Pigment! Wonderful look at a 300 year-old artisanal pastel shop in France...

I love stuff like this. In an age when computer-generated A.I. "art" is all the rage, it's nice to see the craftsmanship that goes into the tools of creating actual art.

   
• Corruption. the only REAL bipartisan issue! I saw this last week and it hasn't left my head. And yet we keep voting for this fucking bullshit instead of persecuting them all for treason...

Treason, which I'll remind you, is punishable by death in this country.

   
Until next time, buckaroo.

   

The Bread You Don’t Bake

Posted on Monday, May 27th, 2024

Dave!People can get really aggressive over Memorial Day. Somebody will inevitably say "Today is the day we honor our troops!" at which point somebody else will inevitably respond with "YOU MORON! THAT'S VETERAN'S DAY! THIS IS MEMORIAL DAY WHEN WE REMEMBER THOSE SOLDIERS WHO LOST THEIR LIVES IN SERVICE OF THEIR COUNTRY!" I see this and am like dude, calm yourself. This is true, but they were at least trying to do a good thing so there's no need to be quite so aggressive about it.

Then today I turned on my television and saw that PlutoTV had a marathon of movies to "salute the troops" and was all "YOU MORON! THAT'S VETERAN'S DAY! THIS IS MEMORIAL DAY WHEN WE REMEMBER THOSE SOLDIERS WHO LOST THEIR LIVES IN SERVICE OF THEIR COUNTRY!" But in my case I was railing against a faceless streaming corporation so it's okay.

Yesterday I had planned to work on home improvement projects, but had to spend the first six hours of my day cleaning my garage wood shop so I could find all the things I needed to actually do the work. Every year I swear I'm going to keep everything organize and clean up as I go... but then I get absorbed in projects and don't do that. So I lose stuff. Which is why I have four hammers, three crowbars, five tape measures, etc. etc.

I found what I needed half-way through cleaning yesterday, so this morning I decided to clean up what was left before continuing work. Alas, it took most of the day so I didn't get much else done. I mean, I did hang the mirror back up in the guest bathroom, so I guess that counts for something.

It was also my big plan to bake bread today but I didn't, so that counts for nothing.

Any other day that would be sad, but isn't nothing what's supposed to happen on a holiday?

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Third Time’s a Data Plan

Posted on Tuesday, May 28th, 2024

Dave!For only the third time in my life, I've changed my mobile company.

I've considered it many, many times, but the effort to switch over something I don't care that much about was never worth it to me. If I can make calls and access the internet, I'm good. But eventually the reasons to switch are far more than the reasons to not switch, so here we are.

My first cellular carrier was Verizon. I liked everything about them and stuck with the company for a little over a decade. Right up until the Summer of 2007. And why did I switch from a mobile carrier that I had been so loyal to? The first iPhone was released, and it was exclusive to AT&T. Had Verizon been able to sell me an iPhone, I would have stayed.

Switching to AT&T was okay. I didn't love them. I didn't hate them. I just went along with them out of sheer momentum for nearly fourteen years. Their coverage was never as good as I had with Verizon, but it was good enough. What was horrific about AT&T was their billing. I have no fucking idea why it was so shitty, but in my last four years it kept building and building until I couldn't take it any more. After I changed plans I spent hours on the phone trying to get my bill straightened out. It never worked. The next month I'd just have to start all over again. The minute I was eligible for T-Mobile's Magenta 55+ plan, I bailed.

The nice thing about T-Mobile was the price. $50 a month. Total. Taxes and fees included. But that price came at a cost... 1) The signal was terrible so many places despite the fact that my handset was showing good bars and 5G. 2) They discriminate against single people, because single-line customers didn't get the perks (like free Netflix) that multi-line customers get, even though single-line customers pay more per line than anybody! 3) They keep changing the game from when I signed up. First I couldn't pay with a credit card any more or they'd take away my auto-pay discount, then they decided to raise the price $5 a month. With no perks, poor quality service, and a price increase, I was done.

And now I've come full circle. I'm back to Verizon. I was going to go with a pre-paid plan just to get the best price, but ultimately went with a regular phone plan because... GET THIS: VERIZON DOESN'T DISCRIMINATE AGAINST SINGLE PEOPLE! Single-line subscribers get all the perks that multi-line subscribers get! So when I factored in an auto-pay discount, a bring-your-own-phone discount, plus the money I would save on stuff I was already paying for by taking advantage of the choose-your-own-perks, I would be paying the same $55 that T-Mobile was charging. Except taxes and fees were not included, so I am paying $8 more. But I was willing to pay it to get Verizon's better service... and to support the fact that VERIZON DOESN'T DISCRIMINATE AGAINST SINGLE PEOPLE! Interesting to note that when I take advantage of other perk savings that are available when my current subscriptions lapse, I can likely recoup the $8, and maybe more...

Comparison Verizon vs. T-Mobile

In three years my "bring your own phone" discount will end. I don't know if Verizon will make an offer to keep me... or if I'll have to switch again... but I think I'm to the point where I'd rather switch for a fourth time than pay more for what I was already getting, so maybe I'll jump to a pre-paid plan then. Or switch carriers. Or give up on a mobile phone altogether.

You can do that, can't you?

   

Spending Millions to Fail Utterly

Posted on Wednesday, May 29th, 2024

Dave!For the LOVE OF GOD, Coca-Cola... could you please stop making it exponentially more confusing to buy your products?

I walk into the mini-mart to buy a Coke Zero. But instead I have to stand there for five minutes trying to figure out which bottle is just plain ol' original Coke Zero. You're flooding the market with a stupid number of variants that nobody gives a shit about which reduces the number of lanes available for the product everybody wants. then you keep changing the labels and hiring shitty fucking designers who let promo art TAKE PRECEDENCE OVER YOUR FUCKING PRODUCT NAME?!? I needed a pair of reading glasses to suss out what the hell I was holding, but I didn't have any so I had to take a picture with my phone so I could zoom in and see if this was actually Coke Zero...

A bottle of Coke Zero. MAYBE!

At the BARE FUCKING MINIMUM you need to have an EFFECTIVE calm space behind the product name so that consumers older than 30 CAN ACTUALLY READ WHAT THE FUCK IT IS. And why are Coke and Coke Zero the same color? Make Coke signature red. Take Coke Zero back to black. That would eliminate 50% of the confusion right there.

Stupid marketing shit drives me insane. It drives me thermonuclear insane when companies with millions of dollars hire design firms who don't know how to market products correctly. Making sure the customer can quickly and easily understand and find your product is Design 101. Stop working with shitty design firms who don't know the ABSOLUTE BARE MINIMUM OF EFFECTIVE PRODUCT DESIGN.

I'd redesign their labels for free just so I could find the shit when I walk into a shop... but effective design isn't something Coke gives a shit about, apparently, so I guess I start taking reading glasses to the mini-mart.

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A Night of YouTube and A Day of Corruption

Posted on Thursday, May 30th, 2024

Dave!I had a really rough night and ended up watching a boatload of YouTube videos to take my mind off the stabbing pain that was shooting through me. Sure it meant I only got 3 hours and 42 minutes of sleep and was exhausted all day long, but it beats having to take painkillers that wreck havoc on my internals.

One of the standout videos I watched was Jenny Nicholson at her most hilarious. The longer this went on, the funnier it got. I think I have a hernia now...

   
BUT THAT'S NOT ALL! There was more Jenny madness to be had: "I guess I don't know that guy's nationality just by looking at him... so... maybe in his case it is okay to be doing this." In this video she's taking a look at this Canadian church which has become famous for their Easter plays. I WAS NOT AT ALL PREPARED!! As she runs through them, things just keep getting more unreal as the years go on. I cannot fathom how much time is spent on these productions. But it's a lot. TIME THAT SHOULD HAVE BEEN SPENT WORSHIPPING THE LORD! GAH!

   
Another great thing I saw was the trailer for Moana 2, which looks gorgeous and hilarious...

   
I finally joined Nebula to watch Thomas Flight's exclusive videos and discovered Mary Spender. What a phenomenal talent. She's on YouTube too and worth a listen. She's got her original music there, but she also comments on music in general. This video on the song Dreams by Fleetwood Mac is so good. What a wild story...

   
And now it's today! I've always loved Antonio Banderas. Even when the film isn't great, he puts his all into his role and is always worth watching. What's so great is that the guy never stops working. The first thing I saw him in was Philadelphia. But the movie I first really remember him from was "Desperado." Then there was Mask of Zorro and The 13th Warrior and Once Upon a Time in Mexico which cemented him as a favorite. Right now I am watching a 2017 film called Security on Netflix. I liked it. Banderas has lost absolutely nothing. And then... BEN KINGSLEY?!?? It's kinda Die Hard in a mall, but in a good way. Plenty of action, some dark turns, and Banderas killing it...

Enjoyed it quite a lot. In a day when fascist assholes are wanting to close libraries, ban books, and keep kids from reading, it's nice to remember more literate times.

In other news...

As usual, neither the Left nor the Right is happy with my reaction to the Trump verdict, but I'm getting used to it. Because what I have to say is this... "Great! Now let's go after the rest of these corrupt politicians and purge the government in BOTH parties."

Overwhelming evidence. Guilty on all 34 counts. That's what his party wants representing them in government? But then I look at Democrats and their love of Nancy Pelosi and her corrupt insider-trading ass, which they excuse away because her husband made the actual trades, and it's like... yeah. She couldn't have possibly told him to sell their Google stock right before Google would be sued over antitrust violations. That totally tracks.

Americans need to wake the fuck up. The only reason that 90% of these politicians are in government "service" is so they can exploit their office for money and power. Period. Ban politicians from trading stocks or accepting money from PACs and lobbyists, make the penalty for corruption be death by firing squad, and watch how fast most of them abandon a job that once meant guaranteed money and power.

Corruption is built into our political system, and the ones who can stop it are the ones running it.

Which is why I pledge fealty to no politician or political party. I am sick of all of it.

   

Taste the Rainbow 2024

Posted on Friday, May 31st, 2024

Dave!Tomorrow is the start of Pride Month.

It's a time of appreciation, love, and support for LGBTQ persons from their community and its allies. Given what they have to endure in our toxic society it's darn important (straight people can have the other 11 months of the year). It's especially important for queer youth, who need affirmation that they are not alone and there are people out there who love and accept them for exactly who they are... despite whatever bullying and hate that comes their way.

It's also a time where corporations capitalize on Pride by slapping a rainbow on everything in order to make money. Sometimes to show support. But most times to make money. Or possibly to show support and make money.

Marriage Equality for All

As usual I'll devote the month to LGBTQ movies old & new. This year is shaping up to go like this (December is usually all Hallmark Christmas movies, but I've lost access to Hallmark Channel, so I had to switch things up)....

  • ✓ JANUARY: Concert films.
  • ✓ FEBRUARY: Movies for Black History Month.
  • ✓ MARCH: Indie movies.
  • ✓ APRIL: Italian films.
  • ✓ MAY: Science fiction flicks.
  • JUNE: Movies for Pride Month.
  • JULY: Historical films (scheduled).
  • AUGUST: Disney movies (scheduled).
  • SEPTEMBER: 80's movies (scheduled).
  • OCTOBER: Horror flicks (scheduled).
  • NOVEMBER: Super-Hero movies (scheduled).
  • DECEMBER: Hallmark Rom-com movies (scheduled).

I always try to watch a movie a day, but sometimes I binge a series over a couple days if that fits my schedule better. And usually I try for a 50/50 split between favorite movies and movies I haven't seen before to be sure I don't get flooded with duds. That's essential with LGBTQ movies because way too often they're rooted in heartbreak or tragedy and there's only so much of that you can take night after night.

This year I'm starting with Date and Switch, so at least I won't have to worry about heartbreak or tragedy right off the bat. Happy Pride, everybody.

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