Pardoned Jan. 6 rioter to plead guilty in child sexual abuse case, adding to pattern.

Turns out when you pardon criminals, they apparently feel invincible and go on committing more crimes. Who knew?

It is increasingly damaging to my mental state to look at the news or social media lately. It's all madness and stupidity and shittiness and hypocrisy from here on out, and there's nothing really to be done but accept that this is where we're at.

And it's the hypocrisy which cuts the deepest.

Every time Trump drops another load of shit on an undeserving world, the first thing that crosses my mind is "Can you fucking imagine if Obama were to do this?" I mean seriously... the big news of the day is Trump sharing a photo of his as Jesus. Something so ridiculous that even some of his base is calling him out on it. But then... then Trump says "Oh, I thought it was me as a doctor." Which is entirely new levels of bullshit, but there's his base... pulling out the knife and fork to eat that shit up.

AND CAN YOU JUST IMAGINE IF OBAMA SHARED AN IMAGE LIKE THAT?!?

There would literally be Trump supporters calling for him to be executed!

But not their Orange Jesus.

He gets a pass no matter how much repugnant, vile, awful, crap he does.

I mean... imagine for a minute that the Pentagon got caught spending $93 billion on frivolous shit like lobster, a grand piano, and ice cream machines under Obama's watch. Just fucking imagine what the MAGA reaction would have been. But Hegseth blows through NINETY-THREE BILLION FUCKING DOLLARS on stupid crap and it's barely a blip on the radar. MAGA couldn't care less...

Then to really have your brain liquify, just think about how $93 billion could have been spent benefiting the American people. In a day and age where benefit after benefit of being a taxpayer is getting stripped away, lobster dinner for The Pentagon.

Jesus Christ.

The Easter Bunny may be coming to town, but I'm goofing around on the internet ... because an all new Bullet Sunday starts... now...

   
• Work Chums! I've seen this several times, but I don't think I've shared it before...

If you've dealt with insurance before, you get it.

   
• Smartest Phone! Kit-Kat drama aside, this was my favorite April Fool's joke I saw...

Makes me want to actually buy a Bluey Phone!

   
• Geography! Washington is weird, y'all...

If you're not from here, you don't know how weird though.

   
• NEWSFLASH: MS. NOEM IS DEVASTATED. THE FAMILY WAS BLINDSIDED BY THIS, AND THEY ASK FOR PRIVACY AND PRAYERS AT THE TIME. And I'm asking you to fuck off with your bullshit. You used your position to utterly destroy lives without any regard to their privacy... and you certainly didn't pray on their behalf. Yet you have the absolute gall to ask for "privacy and prayers?" I do wonder if she was fired for this because the White House had advanced notice. They're already neck-deep in scandal, so it makes sense they would want to get this as far away from them as possible. I'd try to feel sorry for Bryon Noem getting attacked over something that was his own private business... but he knew what he married into and what she was. It's no surprise this is blowing up because of his own doing.

   
• Turn It Off and Back On Again! What's delicious about living in the digital age is that assholes can get internet detectives crawling up their ass with a microscope after they do something shitty. Take for instance this judge, who was a heinous douche to an IT worker helping him out. Many judges think they are gods, and when you show them that they're not, they react badly...

And now the internet has been digging up everything from his bankruptcies to other asshole behaviors and publishing them for the whole word to see. Good. That's what the internet should be used for.

   
• How is The Dow? In honor of the puss-filled piece of shit who used her position to protect sexual predators getting fired, I am re-posting the only good thing that came out of her tenure...

Now you can fuck off and just go away until somebody drags your ass in front of The Hague. And, God-willing, your former boss will be there with you. Speaking of which, here's the only good thing to come out of his tenure...

Any guesses as to who's next on the administration firings distraction BINGO card?

   
And on that note, Happy Easter to all who celebrate.

Snow at last. Snow at last. I still think we're going to be in the middle of a drought come Summer, but on Friday there was finally snow. Quite a lot of it actually. But don't you worry about me... because an all new Bullet Sunday starts... now...

   
• Nowalla, Part Deux! Remember location-sharing apps from back in the day? The primary players were FourSquare and Gowalla. My hands-down favorite was Gowalla, which made exploring fun and had stamps you could collect. I was such a fan, that I bought my own Gowalla stamp for Blogography HQ...

Then one day Gowalla shut down after being acquired by Facebook (I'm positive that Facebook bought it just to kill it because they didn't want any competition for their "check-ins"). All the stamps I collected, all the places I logged, all the travels I shared, all the objects I found, all the spots I founded... not to mention my custom stamp... were gone. We were promised that we'd be able to download our data, but it never happened. I'm still a bit raw over it. Then it was announced that Gowalla would be relaunching back in 2021. I somehow missed that the new app was released in 2023. At which point it immediately ceased development. When I found it last week, I downloaded it just to see what it was like. And it was shit. All the charm was gone. And of course none of the stamps or any other stuff from the original was still there. It just lets you share your location with friends in a boring way... like Facebook... and they shouldn't have even bothered.

   
• Lil'! Just the internet doin' it's internet thing. And right now the internet is obsessing over Lil' Finder Guy. He briefly appeared in Apple marketing for their new MacBook Neo...

Now he's been modeled and is popping up everywhere...

From Basic Apple Guy

He's based on the Apple Finder logo which Apple appears to be playing with...

Apple marketing is waking up, it would appear.

   
• New! And speaking of Apple's MacBook Neo, the reviews are starting to hit and it's more impressive than I thought it would be. I selected this one to share, because it nicely puts things in perspective...

Nice! But not shocking. The A-series chip in an iPhone is very capable. I just wasn't expecting it to be this capable in a laptop. It's marketed to people who want to do simple things and have no need for the power of a MacBook Pro. But apparently you can still use it for Pro things.

   
• Human Clay! I had seen the story that Aardman, the company behind some of my favorite animation, was in danger of shutting down because the company making the clay they use was being shut down. It was nowhere nearly so dramatic, which I found out from this video I saw last night. Still, it's interesting...

If nothing else, I'm a little encouraged that this video dispells the idea that Aardman is going to give up on hand-hewn clay to tell their stories and start using 3D modeling instead.

   
• Crumbley! My undying love for Zoey Deschanel cannot be overstated. I thought I was alone in finding Crumbl cookies do not even remotely live up to the hype. Most times I find them to be a lump of sugar that are underbaked. Other times I enjoy the topping more than the cookie underneath...

I've had one cookie I enjoyed from Crumbl, and it was no more special than other bakery cookies I've had. It was essentially a soft version of a big OREO cookie with OREO crumbs on top.

   
• No Love Like Christian Hate! This is absolutely fucking outrageous...

If you're going to imply that Mayor Zohran Mamdani had something to do with 9/11 and call him an "enemy" because of his faith, then are you also going to tie every atrocity committed by Christians to every Christian in this country? All the shootings and bombings by self-professed Christians means that Christians are "the enemy within the gates?" It shouldn't be a surprise that Tommy Tuberville is dropping stupid racist shit like this. That's all he does. And he can't comprehend what "freedom of religion" means in the "land of the free" so ignorant dipshit bigoted crap and lies are all you get. And lest we forget that his "Tommy Tuberville Foundation" gave less than 18% of the money it took in to actual charity. So even if he wasn't already douchebag, he'd still be a piece of shit. Just look into how he treats our military veterans. How he treats any American who isn't Tommy Tuberville. This is the guy who calls Democrats "a satanic cult," but his every action just proves where true evil is, and it looks him in the mirror every morning. Tommy proudly processes to be a member of The Church of Christ, but is one of the lease Christ-like people on the planet. I have Muslim friends who are worth a hundred of him. A thousand of him. It's not hard when they're being compared to inhuman garbage.

   
• I'm a Meme! This is a better story than it has a right to be...

Fate, sometimes, has other plans.

   
• Aeon! One of the most amazing apps I use on a regular basis is Aeon Timeline. It's mainly a writing tool, but I started using it to outline projects at work and it's a complete and total game-changer. Of course if you are a writer, it is a godsend. I haven't found an easier way to organize my thoughts for events in time... no matter what they may be.

If you need to work with timelines for whatever reason, it's worth a look.

   
Since the snow hasn't all melted yet, I'm going to be cowering in my home all day. If I get ambitious, I might clean my house and wash clothes.

I honestly don't understand why the fuck people concern themselves with what other people are eating. Or, even worse, condemn people for their choices. A lot of times this comes down to "food influencers" shaming everybody for content. Telling people that their cheaper foods are garbage and they should be eating expensive organic stuff instead. Whether people can afford it or not. Or, in the case of truly fucking shitty "food influencers" (like the Queen of Bullshit Misinformation, "Food Babe" Vani Hari) dishing outright misinformation about food, and condemning methods of food production which they deems "bad" even though science may not support the claim. But influencers doesn't give a fuck. All they care about is the clicks for cash.

In my case, I simply don't want to kill animals to eat. Period. That's what guides my dietary choices. And, lucky for me, food options exist which help me achieve my goal. And, much to my joy, these options are getting more versatile, convenient, and delicious all the time. I am currently hopelessly addicted to Beyond Stack Burgers. I would eat them morning, noon, and night if the coconut oil content didn't cause me digestion woes. So instead I just eat them morning and night.

And, yes, I know what the fuck is in it. The ingredients are right on the package, so I don't need some shitty "influencer" to read them to me: Water, Pea Protein, Canola Oil, Refined Coconut Oil, Rice Protein, Natural Flavors, 2% or less of Methylcellulose, Potato Protein, Apple Extract, Salt, Pomegranate Concentrate, Vinegar, Lemon Juice Concentrate, Potassium Salt, Dextrose, Spices, Faba Bean Protein, Vitamins and Minerals (Zinc Sulfate, Niacinamide [Vitamin B3], Pyridoxine Hydrochloride [Vitamin B6], Cyanocobalamin [Vitamin B12], Calcium Pantothenate [Vitamin B5]), Vegetable Juice Color (with Beet).

And, yes, I know what the fuck the nutrition values are. That's printed right on the package too. The only problematic values to me are saturated fat (from the coconut oil) and the sodium (260mg).

But God-forbid I be allowed to make decisions for myself without somebody stepping in to tell me where I'm going wrong.

Lately I've been inundated with videos about why plant-based meats have "failed."

Most of it is the shitty fucking influencer brigade, praising people for finally coming to their senses by dropping horribly "unhealthy" fake meats and going back to real meat (mad cow, cancerous tumors, feces, steroids, and all). Because nothing screams "health" than having cow shit in your hamburger, I guess.

But the real story is more nuanced and interesting than that. Which is where actual journalism comes into play... like this story from Business Insider...

I'm glad they didn't leave out the fact that real meat is heavily subsidized by the government while plant-base "meat" is mostly left to fend for itself. This, coupled with the economics of scale, put fake "meat" at a disadvantage compared to the slaughterhouses. I'm happy to drive a (relatively) cheap car so I can afford my chosen diet (among other things), but a lot of people aren't. Though given the current high price of food, the extra money is a drop in the bucket compared to the total grocery bill which is hurting vegetarians and carnivores alike.

If "food influencers" truly gave a shit about people's well-being, they'd put their energy into advocating being able to afford food in the first place.

But that doesn't pay as well, so here we are.

Thanks to the absolute madness that is Daylight Saving Time, I get a week of cat anger as they adapt to the time change, but I'm not in a panic yet... because an all new Bullet Sunday starts... now...

   
• NEWSFLASH: Lay’s Rebrands Because Customers Apparently Didn’t Know Chips Were Made With ‘Real Potatoes’. Because of course. They haven't had "Potato Chips" on the package since 2007... and I guess those potatoes on the package aren't a big enough clue. That being said, the Lay's rebrand is gorgeous. Kinda. The new logo typeface looks fresh while honoring what came before. The banner is so much better, looking like a design element instead of a weird merging with the sun(?) behind it. And, yep, it IS a sun, because now they have nice rays behind it. Perfect. And I love the wood table look of the background...

BUT THEN... they just take random photo elements and glop everything to the logo unit? What a mess...

AND COULDN'T THEY HAVE STAGGERED THE POTATOES A LITTLE BIT??? OR RE-THINK THE PHOTO ELEMENTS COMPLETELY? WHAT DESIGNER JUST STICKS EVERYTHING TO THE LOGO LIKE IT'S A GAME OF KATAMARI DAMACY??? ACK! ACK! ACK!

Lay's created a gorgeous new logo then sabotaged it utterly. Those chips don't even look like chips (they look more like Pringles) and the potatoes are smaller than the chips they spawn? And because the taters are evenly placed, they look like a new design element which distracts the eye from the logo... they look like boobs on the bag or something? What were they thinking? This is a gorgeous treatment that is completely ruined by the photo elements being badly chosen and badly placed. Blergh. Such a missed opportunity.

   
• Property Brothers! BWAH HA HA HAAAAA. Things like this are when Saturday Night Live shines...

Biting satire that's funny because it's true. This is our reality.

   
• Precious Development?!? Parents are free to make decisions about their kid all they want. I mean, I draw the line when they are endangering the child but, for the most part, you do you when it comes to decisions about your own child. But this is abhorrent...

Fuck you and your Rainbow Bright face glitter shit. If you don't provide the teacher with alternative treats, what is the teacher supposed to do? Give everybody a treat EXCEPT your kid? How pissed off would you be then? It's entirely different if a kid has a peanut allergy and he was given peanuts. But a ring pop? To which she supplied no alternative? Like the teacher is supposed to go out and buy every alternative her class might require ON TOP OF the ring pops she already spent HER OWN MONEY on?!? Get fucked.

   
• Dear Deere! Another must watch video. "Why can't people repair the things they buy?" Because companies love money. iPhone broken? It can't be repaired by anybody but Apple or it gets bricked. McDonald's ice cream machine broken? Can't be repaired by anybody but the manufacturer or else you get sued (which is why they're always broken). Tractor broken? Can't get it repaired by anybody but John Deere because it's locked behind the software paywall. Spend a half-million dollars on a piece of John Deere equipment? You don't own it. They do. You're just paying for the right to license it. This is all kinds of fucked up, but corporations own the government, so they can do whatever the fuck they want to...

You don't own shit even if you pay for it. And lobbyists will keep spending billions to own politicians to keep it that way. God Bless 'Murica. But there is hope. "Right to Repair" laws are becoming a reality because politicians are being called out for their bullshit. More and more people need to speak out against this crap so that politicians will have no choice but to listen.

   
• Pepita Perfect! Last night I made one of my most favorite dishes: butternut squash ravioli in browned Kerrygold butter, crispy fried sage, toasted pepitas, and black peppercorns (which have been ground with a dash of nutmeg)...

I really need to buy a pasta roller so I can make my own though. Rana makes some good stuff, but I would prefer it without the orange color, as God intended, so it looks more appetizing instead of an orange blob. But anyway… a simple dish that’s also a bit complex in flavor.

   
• I HAVE TURBO PENIS! Yes, it happened to me! Lord how I love these debunk videos. Nobody does a takedown like Professor Dave. This should be mandatory viewing so that people understand how fucking stupid anti-vaxer "leaders" are...

The VAERS examination had me howling. How do people get duped by these idiots? It makes me crazy. We are losing herd immunity because people actually listen to these moronic douches.

   
• Men HATE This! GAG!!! I'm of the opinion that people should feel free to wear whatever the hell they want to wear. If you like it and it's comfortable and you can afford it... go for it. Nobody else has to approve. Nobody else's opinion matters. They aren't wearing it... you are. Which is why when I ran across this condescending gatekeeping asshole's YouTube channel, I couldn't roll my eyes hard enough. It's one thing to offer suggestions as to what people should consider wearing... it's quite another to pass judgement in the most immature and idiotic way possible. I mean, just look at these thumbnails...

She has very serious opinions as to what you're allowed to wear when you're over thirty. I'd argue that some could say that a woman over 35 shouldn't be wearing belly shirts as she's often seen doing... but I'm not a sanctimonious douche who spends my time gatekeeping clothing for views. Especially when you're acting like a fucking ten-year-old. An adult would realize that some people have to wear whatever they can afford... or whatever they're handed. So making fun of them or condemning them is a dick move. As it is when you make fun of people for wearing what they like.

   
• NEWSFLASH: RFK Jr. concedes administration lacks scientific evidence on Tylenol claims. OF COURSE THERE ISN'T ANY EVIDENCE, YOU STUPID FUCK! And yet you had the president announce to the world that Tylenol "causes autism." What kind of idiotic shit is running through your worm-riddled brain that you are so confident in spreading this crap misinformation? What kind of idiotic shit is running through President Trump's dementia-riddled brain that he believes your nonsense instead of ACTUAL FUCKING SCIENTIFIC RESEARCH?!? Christ, I hate living in the stupidest fucking timeline.

   
And now back to spending an extra hour of my Daylight Saving day.

It has been really difficult to get through my work day when I'm checking the news every 15 minutes to see how Jamaica is faring.

Last night I looked through my photos of Ocho Rios and Dunn's Falls Park from when my mom and I visited. There's no photo of my mom where she's not smiling. Jamaica kinda has that vibe. Such welcoming, kind people you can't help but be happy.

Really worried about how the people and animals are faring in the face of such destruction. They say the storm is losing intensity, but is still rated Category 5.

I've been holding this post for a couple days because I was debating whether to say something or not.

I finally decided to say something.

Do not be these people. By heading to Jamaica where you'll be using up valuable resources needed to help people who will have lost everything, you're just being a terrible person. You can get a refund on your ticket during emergency situations like this, so why?

I really hope this is fake.

In which case it's probably worse because you are making fun of people who will have lost everything.

Why are people like this? Empathy and decency are becoming a thing of the past.

I'm a vegetarian. I choose to not eat meat. So imagine for a minute that I am a cook at a vegetarian restaurant. One day, the owner decides that we're going to start serving meat. I refuse to cook it because it goes against my vegetarian beliefs. The owner says "Well, that's the job. You either do the job or you can't work here." I not only refuse to cook meat, I also refuse to quit. Then I refuse to leave the restaurant. So the owner calls the police to have me removed. I go to jail for trespassing for five days. The owner says that this entire ordeal has made them decide to fire me, and they tell me to never come back.

And you should know that the entire time I was working for the vegetarian restaurant I was moonlighting as a cook for Burger King, McDonald's, and Kentucky Fried Chicken. And I was eating at McDonald's while I was cooking at Burger King.

Seven years later I petition the Supreme Court to ban meat completely.

Because if I don't want to eat it, nobody should have the freedom to eat it!

Cannot get my hands to stop smelling like the onions I just cut, but I'll try my best not to throw up on my keyboard... because an all new Bullet Sunday starts... now...

   
• Plague Doctor! I was researching the bubonic plague (don't ask). Eventually I got to Alexandre Émile John Yersin, the Swiss-French doctor who co-discoverer of the cause of the plague and figured out it was being spread by rats. He's a pretty amazing guy with some amazing accomplishments. But here's the thing... he's also a total snack. JUST LOOK AT THIS PHOTO!

He was apparently celibate, dedicating his entire life to making other people's lives better. Which he probably did by melting ovaries as he walked down the street. — And here's where it gets interesting... I remember the "American Market" in Ho Chi Minh City (Saigon), which is also called "Yersin Market" because it's on Yersin Street, named after our boy here because he ended up moving to Vietnam for the remainder of his life of research (where he founded the Medical School of Hanoi, and was a pioneer in cultivating rubber trees!). When it comes to heroes of history, this guy is definitely on that list.

   
• Neverending! Nothing quite finding a cover of a song that you prefer over the original. This is pretty cool...

Not that the original Limahl track was bad by any means...

I just like the new synth arrangement of the material better.

   
• Addams! The first half of the second season of Wednesday is fun. And there's a couple cameos that are so flawlessly cast that I almost didn't believe it. Yeah, yeah, I know there are people who are big mad that it isn't faithful to the source material, but it can be its own thing and still be entertaining...

Though, to be honest, I still prefer the two films starring Raul Julia, Anjelica Huston, Christopher Lloyd, and Christina Ricci over any adaptation of the original The Addams Family comic.

   
• It's Doug! All the Jeopardy and Black Jeopardy sketches on SNL are hilarious, but I find myself watching this one at least every-other month...

The fact that Tom Hanks was willing to make fun of himself this badly makes it even more funny than it already was. And, of course, Mr. Hanks is no stranger to Jeopardy sketches... he has a hilarious role on Black Jeopardy...

Though Eddie Murphy's impersonation of Tracy Morgan in front of Tracy Morgan remains one of the funniest things I've ever seen...

You know it's funny when you can break Tracy Morgan while playing Tracy Morgan.

   
• Unhappy! Watched Happy Gilmore 2 last night. Good Lord. Was looking forward to something charming, nostalgic, and funny to distract me from the day... instead Netflix approved a two hour mess that's more depressing than funny. Adam Sandler is an alcoholic ass-hat who accidentally killed his wife at the very beginning of the movie? Hilarious...

You know you're in deep, deep trouble when you're looking forward to seeing Shooter McGavin more than the main character. Hell, you're happy to see anybody except Happy on the screen (Bad Bunny continues to surprise me with just how good he is... just like in Bullet Train, his character is a highlight). Fortunately, there's some genuinely funny moments and a lot of great cameos which allowed me to get through the film on nostalgia alone. But... come on... in a day and age when life is depressing enough, can we not do this? Killed his wife in the first two minutes? Really? This is where we're at?

   
• Just Fuck Off Already! Precious few people are a bigger piece of shit than Bill Maher. I have never understood his popularity. He has bad take after bad take based on misleading statements and outright lies, and has shown himself to be a dick of the highest order every chance he gets. I ignored him forever... until he was taken to school by Ben Affleck, of all people, over his shitty fucking Islamophobia. From then on I actively loathed him. Which is why Big Joel's latest video really hit for me. Well worth a watch...

Lord. If you want to be dishonest with your audience so you can be a self-righteous douche, nobody's stopping you. But if you actually think that's makes you a better person, who the fuck are you?

   
• Slop! I reported a Facebook page that is nothing more than fake AI-generated bullshit about Dolly Parton dying...

Anybody willing to lay odds on Facebook hitting back with "We didn't delete this page"... because Facebook is ALSO run by fake AI-generated bullshit? In all seriousness, fuck these AI scammer pieces of shit. Dolly Parton deserves far better than this stupid crap.

   
• NEWSFLASH: Tim Cook appeals to Trump’s love of gold with a 24-karat base for Apple plaque. So what's next? Tim Cook just flies the Apple jet to DC and blows Trump on the White House front lawn at a press event? I don't know what's more embarrassing... the fact we have a president who requires you suck up to him personally so you can keep your company in business, or the fact that CEOs are lining up to do it.

   
And now I'm back to smelling like onions.

So there I am petting Jenny, my skittish orange cat, when my phone rings. Because of my job, I can't turn my phone off or set it to only ring for known callers, because I can have people calling from anywhere at any time. And I have to answer.

And so I do.

After Jenny gets scared by the ringing and goes running upstairs.

At which point she hangs up on me.

Outright LYING to people over their finances is about as low as it gets. Fuck you. Making it sound like you're some official calling about a person's credit cards like there's a problem when you're just another fucking scammer asshole credit card consolidation company trying to drum up business by throwing out some random number and hoping it hits.

This scammer piece of shit should consider herself very, very lucky that I don't have the ability to make people's heads explode over the phone.

VERY.