No.

Decades ago, I was a kinda-sometimes programmer. Mostly for personal use in a programming languages called Pascal (followed by Modula-2, C++, Objective-C, Perl, Java, and Rust).

Along the way I picked up a few tools which made programming easier. Editors, outliners, re-compilers, and the rest. One thing that I didn't pick up was learning RegEx (or "regex" if you're boring).

Shorthand for Regular Expressions, this is a tool which allows you to search for text in interesting and helpful ways... then act on what you find. And I don't know why I never looked at it. I had certainly heard of it, but ignored it for forever.

Until I couldn't.

This week I have been working on a difficult work project when I finally ran into a wall. I needed to alter hundreds of occurrences of text which was ever-changing. I had no idea how to do it. I assumed there would be a tool that allowed wildcard functions. And there are some. But none of them could do what I needed to do, and I resigned myself to manually changing everything.

And all of a sudden I remembered RegEx.

The reason I couldn't find a tool which did what I needed was because it had already been invented in the 1950's.

Twenty minutes later, and I had learned what I needed to learn and had completed a task which would have taken hours.

My biggest regret in life is that I didn't learn how to learn RegEx earlier than I did.

   
I am so tired, y'all.

I have yet to run across a word that offends me. Words are, after all, just words. Sure there's ways of stringing words together which can be offensive, but overall I cannot be bothered.

And because of the way I don't process words as "bad," I have a tough time understanding the pearl-clutching that can ensue when somebody hears a word they don't like. I mean, certainly you don't want to say bad words in front of young children who don't have the mental capacity to mimic such words in inappropriate places, but adults can choose to ignore things quite easily.

Today I ran across this clip from the movie Office Romance on Netflix which reminded me of a situation several years ago...

I was in Chicago meeting with some work colleagues at a bar down the street. A friend from the UK was in town, so I invited him along. At some point in the evening, my friend and I were telling stories about each other to my co-workers, when he started his next story with "Let me tell you about this cunt right here!" My co-workers laughed, but two women at the table next to ours did not. They were both upset, but one of the women was completely enraged. My friend apologized and said he forgot that word was viewed differently here, but that did nothing to appease the angry women who took their drinks and walked to another table across the bar.

"What a cunt!" my friend said, as everybody bust out laughing.

A part of me was wondering if we would get asked to leave because the women complained. But, if they did complain, it fell on deaf ears because we were there for another couple hours.

The next day at work I found out from one of my coworkers that the angriest woman did complain about us. But the bartender, who was a woman, just said "Okay" and that was the end of it.

I mentioned it to my British friend a couple nights later before I headed home.

His thoughts on the bartender? "Now THAT'S a cunt!"

Today I took a couple photos with my iPhone, as I do almost every day. It all went well, the photos were nice, and I went on with my life. Then, about an hour later, I picked up my iPhone and it was hot to the touch. That's when I noticed the camera was still running. I exited out of it, assuming it was hot because I accidentally left the camera going. But when I picked up the phone to go home for the day, it was still hot to the touch. So I rebooted it thinking that something was stuck running and off I went.

The reboot did nothing. Furthermore, I saw that my battery level was almost zero. So I ran upstairs and put it on my wireless charger. But when I finally went to bed, I saw that it would charge enough to turn on, run out of charge immediately, then turn off and repeat the cycle over and over and over.

Multiple resets did nothing, probably because it ran out of charge before it could register the reset. So I finally hooked it up (wired) to the most powerful charger I own. This got it charged quickly enough that I was able to shut it down completely before it ran out of power. And when I woke up, it was back to normal.

At which point I realized that I left a malfunctioning phone plugged in all night.

I'm lucky it didn't explode.

In other news, I think I'm too susceptible to social media marketing.

There's a content creator who operates under What the F Show who has been making some Nerf War skits that have been making me regret giving away my Nerf gun...

And so I spent a whole $7 to order a new one. Just to have on-hand, because sometimes I like shooting random visitors to my house with a Nerf dart.

Plus I'll feel safer at night knowing that I'm armed.

Good news, everyone! I have water again! Sunday the pressure was so low as to be non-existent, but I put a pot under the spout and turned the water on all day. Then around dinner time I had just enough water collected to boil pasta so I could have be some butternut squash ravioli in browned butter with crispy-fried sage. Something I've been wanting since I bought everything for it the previous Sunday.

It was pretty delicious...

Today I had to get my car serviced. Before I could even sit down, I had a text providing me a link to tracking the progress on my car. That's nice, I thought.

It sat in the shop for FORTY-FIVE MINUTES before they got around to it. My appointment was at 2:15. They finally started at 3:00...

Then they managed to get the inspection and oil change done in fifteen minutes, which means their time estimate of "about an hour" was correct in the end. But... dang...

The wait was made worse by a guy in the waiting room watching videos on his phone... WITHOUT USING HEADPHONES... which made the entire wait a horrific experience. Why are assholes so rude like this in public? Because they're assholes, I guess.

After that blight on my day, I went grocery shopping, picked up kitty litter at Petco, and grabbed an ice cream cone at the drive-through before heading home.

Where I had water again, thank heavens. Pasta for everyone!

When it comes to a cruise, anything less than 3 nights doesn't feel worth it... and anything more than 7 nights feels too long to be trapped on a big boat. My cruise was 5 nights, which is just about perfect. But that's not to say that I was happy about disembarking. Oh heck no. I would have gladly stayed onboard for those two extra nights. Bet.

Since they kick you off the ship early in the morning, most people just book a trip home that same day. I usually do not, preferring to stay an extra night at a hotel. It beats having to spend a big chunk of the day waiting for my flight at the airport. And, even more importantly, this time the cost to fly out the same day was significantly more expensive than waiting for some reason.

So... off to Fort Lauderdale Beach for a bit.

To drink seven mojitos of various flavors. Yes, seven...

The place was The Salty Sombrero, which I highly recommend. Great food, great drinks, great service, great view...

My room also had a great view, but it didn't have somebody serving me fresh mojitos all day...

But of course the beach is always better when you're not having to look at it through a window...

And that was it. All that was left to fly home the next morning...

Oh Florida, don't ever change.

Yesterday I went over arguably my favorite things about the Disney Destiny... the themed lounges. But, like the other ships in their line, there's a lot of great theming throughout the entire ship. The overall theme is "Heroes and Villains" and most everything is geared around the concept.

For one thing, the regular staterooms can be decorated with either Hercules, Mulan, Brave, Raya, The Incredibles, or Big Hero 6. Mine was Herc...

Hercules is easily the most prominent character on the ship. He's everywhere...

A neighbor was a pretty big Herc fan and decorated their door accordingly...

And his biggest moment is a live stage show that's remarkably well-done. Easily my favorite of any Disney onboard theater show I've seen, with next-level performances. I liked it so much I saw it twice. And I don't even like Broadway...

But villains have a moment too. One of the "big gets" onboard (in addition to the Cruella show I talked about yesterday) is a magic show by Dr. Facilier in his parlor (and I was sure to tell him that he got robbed because he wasn't in the Tiana's Bayou Adventure ride, and he refused to acknowledge the attraction)...

Maleficent had her own show, and appears in various places around the ship in art and furnishings...

Black Panther is the atrium sculpture, but Loki is the one with his own show...

Most cruise ships do their level best to keep you well-fed and entertained, and Disney is no exception. They've got it all. Including... BABY RACING?!?

Gotta tell you... there were a lot of people on their feet screaming at babies to crawl to the finish line. I honestly don't know if that's a good thing or bad thing. Probably a good thing.

Except for the trauma of being disqualified because you walked instead of crawled.

Come aboard... it's your Destiny!

I've now been on four Disney ships. The Magic and its twin ship The Wonder... and The Wish, and now it's twin ship The Destiny. The former pair are significantly smaller and more intimate than the latter, but all Disney ships (regardless of size) have the impeccable service and theming you'd expect.

The Destiny is a carbon copy of The Wish which I sailed on last December, but a few of the areas have been changed. Most notably, instead of Star Wars: Hyperspace Lounge you get Haunted Mansion Parlor and instead of Nightingale's you get DeVil's and instead of Tiana's The Bayou you get Doctor Strange's The Sanctum and instead of Arendelle: A Frozen Dining Adventure you get The Pridelands: A Lion King Dining Adventure. And, I gotta say, the Destiny versions are in every way superior. So let's take a look at them, shall we?

I was more than a little disappointed in Star Wars: Hyperspace Lounge because it seemed superficial in its theming. But Haunted Mansion Parlor is another matter entirely. It's brilliantly, beautifully, abundantly themed in every way...

The bar has a magical mirror behind it where ghosts and spirits appear. Including Madame Leota...

The fish tank at the center of the room has skeletal fish appearing and disappearing, and it's a very cool effect...

The portraits on the wall are magical things which change over time and even come to life...

As if that wasn't enough, the drinks are fantastic...

   
DeVil's is a piano bar with an appearance by Cruella herself, and involves you writing a song to honor her with an audience participation angle that's genius. If there's a must-do experience which is 100% worth standing in line for an hour to get into, this is it...

The drinks are pretty amazing too...

   
Doctor Strange's The Sanctum doesn't really have the theming you'd hope for, but the bartenders here were exceptional, and I made repeat visits just to chat with them...

If there's a misstep, for me it would be The Pride Lands: Feast of the Lion King. Probably because I was expecting a show which featured the amazing costumes from Julie Taymor's broadway production... but it was just singing. Great singing, for sure, but that's it...

This is all just the tip of the iceberg. And why a Disney cruise is worth your valuable time to explore.

I could have easily spent another day in South Beach, but it's almost impossible to visit Miami without a trip to Little Havana. Not just because it's a vibrant neighborhood with an impeccable vibe and awesome music oozing out of every nook and cranny... but because it's an awesome place to wander.

I love it here...

Lunch was at Cubata, a phenomenal restaurant which is a kinda Cuban/Spanish fusion place with incredible tapas to be had. I would have had a drink at the Hard Rock Cafe, but the pig fucking assholes were closed for a "private event"...

I will never, ever fucking understand how a restaurant chain which strives to be a destination event which practically demands that you visit as many as you can will close the entire fucking place without warning. It's happened to me more than a couple times, and it's one of the big reasons I no longer give a shit if I ever visit another one after having been to 172 of them around the world.

And then it was time to return to South Beach, where adorable robots have taken over the city...

One thing's for sure, it was a beautiful day at the beach...

Sadly, it was also my last day at the beach.