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Bullet Sunday 950

Posted on April 19th, 2026

Dave!After four weeks of being consumed by work, my house has become a complete and total disaster area. But I won't be cleaning up under the bullets are done... because an all new Bullet Sunday starts... now...

   
• It Takes a Village! Looks like I need to start playing Crimson Desert straight away...

Of course my objective in the game is probably going to be quite different than most people.

   
• Fries! AMERICAAAAA, FUCK YEAH! EXTRA LARGE PORTIONS MEAN EXTRA LARGE FREEDOM! AMERICAAAAA, FUCK YEAH! GREAT FREEDOM FRIES FOR THE GREATEST COUNTRY ON EARTH! AMERICAAAAA, FUCK YEAH!

@phoebeisginger1 why are we putting that in fries?! #uk #fries #usa #mcdonalds #culture ♬ original sound - Phoebe🧡

Now I want fries.

   
• Luna Luna! In 1987 there was an installation in Hamburg that was rather unique... it combined art with a theme park. Back in 2023, I found out about it when it was unpacked, restored, and went on a global tour. I toyed with the idea of flying down to see it in L.A. in March of 2024 as a birthday present to myself, but never made it. Then I promptly forgot about it. Enter Mike From the Party, whose amazing YouTube channel I subscribe to, and he's done a brilliantly extensive video on Luna Luna. It's an hour-and-a-half long, but it's interesting enough to be worth your valuable time...

One one hand, I dearly wish that Mike would make more videos like this. On the other hand, I worry that the quality of his videos will suffer if he does.

   
• This isn't just me being a dickhead! Another brilliant YouTube channel I obsess over is Folding Ideas. And his latest is an interesting take on Mr. Beast which includes a surprising behind-the-scenes look I never would have expected...

I'd argue that these YouTube channels are every bit as important and interesting as anything you'll see on television or in the movies.

   
• Ungentlemanly Free! One of my favorite movies of all time, The Ministry of Ungentlemanly Warfare, is streaming FREE (ad supported) on The Roku Channel. It's Guy Ritchie at his Guy Ritchiest, and has a stellar cast (including incredible turns by Henry Cavill, Alan Ritchson, and many more) and worth a watch if you missed it...

I can't even tell you have many times I've watched this film.

   
• Reversal of Fortune! Food for thought...

Yeah, ladies!

   
• Here We Go Again! Yes. Yes. I am still reeling from the Fake Moon Landing and Flat Earth idiocy clogging up social media since the Artemis II mission. I'm only able to stay sane because of the people debunking these dumbasses. However... there's also something to be said for just calling them out for being stupid and ignorant...

And this 11-year-old video from Vsauce is an old but a goody that absolutely anybody in the above video could have watched to understand why they're speaking nonsense...

But, of course, asking them to educate themselves is like asking for the moon.

   
And now I suppose I should get back to cleaning my home.

   

Bullet Sunday 949

Posted on April 12th, 2026

Dave!I'm not going to let the fact that my neck is hurting worse now than it has been stop me from updating Blogography. At least not this time.. because an all new Bullet Sunday starts... now...

   
• Cookies! Isn't it nice how Girl Scouts cookies come in convenient single-serving packs? That way you know exactly how many to eat. I'd consume an entire box of Trefoils if not for the fact that they smartly wrap them into two servings...

Two packs of cookies coming out of a box.

Samoas come in a tray, not a package, because there's only one serving per box. Every year I order cookies from Girl Scout Troop 6000, which serves girls in New York City's shelter system. Though I'd buy cookies from any troop, given how Girl Scouts is one of the most accepting, inclusive organization on the planet. A phenomenal model for future generations.

   
• Drone Entertainment! One of the last times I was at Walt Disney World, there was a drone show at Disney Springs. Called Disney Dreams That Soar, it was an experimental free event that ran for about four months. While music played, 800 drones made cool shapes in the air, and most people believed that this was a step towards reducing or eliminating fireworks at the park. Fireworks are not reusable like drones, so they're expensive. And they also cause noise and pollution that upsets people living near the parks. It would make sense that they would want to cut back. And now there's this show in China featuring 22,580 drones...

In all honesty, drone shows are getting so good that I'd argue they're a superior form of entertainment... and could probably simulate fireworks in a way that's as good, if not better, than the real thing. And if anybody could make this work, it would be Disney.

   
• Word! This is one of those simple posts which illustrates a concept so brilliantly that you don't even have to understand what it's talking about to understand what's being said...

Fortunately, I've never had to deal much with Microsoft Word... I've always used desktop publishing or an illustration app for that. But because of that, my frustration with trying to make a photo land where I want is even more frustrating.

   
• And Right Before Wildfire Season! NEWSFLASH: Trump Administration Orders Dismantling of the US Forest Service. Fuck them all. I am sick and fucking tired of losing vital national services to give money to the president's millionaire and billionaire owners, and to finance this illegal, stupid-ass war. The US Forest Service deserves better than this fucking bullshit. They are dedicated, essential workers studying and protecting our forests and grasslands...


Photo credit: Preston Keres / USDA

The American People deserve more than this fucking bullshit. This is probably a set-up so Trump can sell off our vital resources to be plundered by his owners. The office of the President of the United States of America has turned into one massive grift. I mean, it's just been revealed that the steel for his fucked-up ballroom is NOT being sourced from American companies after he championed US Steel during his campaign... he's bought the steel from Europe. Probably from somebody who has incriminating photos of him on Epstein Island.

   
• Greatness! And, while I'm on the subject... exactly where is all the money going from the "big beautiful tariffs" the American people are paying? We keep getting our services and benefits cut... so the money ain't going there. The National Debit is higher than ever... so the money's not going there. Jobs are being slashed left and right... so the money's not going there. Trump has collected TENS OF BILLIONS of OUR dollars. So WHERE IS THE FUCKING MONEY?

It blows my fucking mind that this country isn't in outright revolt right now.

   
• AI Slop... IN SPAAAACE! A photo was circulating today of the Artemis II Orion capsule re-entry... as captured by the International Space Station...

Except when you go to the official ISS Instagram, this is what they had to say: "Our crew on the @iss caught a glimpse of the @nasaartemis II crew as they re-entered the atmosphere from their journey to the Moon! We first saw a bright light and a trail as the service module burned up. We didn’t see the Orion capsule itself as it re-entered, but we saw the wispy trail it left behind in the upper atmosphere. Overjoyed that our friends are safely back on Earth after their awe-inspiring mission!."

THIS is what they saw...

A faint trail of the Orion capsule
Photo Credit: ISS

And of course when you go to debunk the fake image, you find that the person who posted it has turned off comments. NOT deleted the misinformation... turned off the comments!

REDACTED turned off commenting for this post

There's no bigger metaphor for what's going on right now in the world than this.

   
• Mean-Spirited? Sweet Pee holds a press conference to deny allegations of her ties to Epstein, despite the fact that emails and photos exist showing she absolutely had ties to Epstein. If BULLSHIT had a face, here it is...

Melanoma at her press conference.
Photo Credit: Evan Vucci/Reuters

Epstein and Maxwell with Best Friends Donald and Melanoma
Photo Credit: CSPAN/GETTY

And you DIDN'T fucking "meet your husband at a party in 1998"... at the time you met MARLA MAPLES' HUSBAND at a party in 1998. Furthermore, if you to expect people to stop making "mean-spirited comments" about you, then you can fuck right off. You stand idly by while your husband makes some of the most vile, disgusting, horrific "mean-spirited comments" towards other people and don't give a shit, so nobody gives a fuck about what's being directed your way. "Be best" for you and yours before demanding it from others.

   
And now back to my neck recovery, already in progress.

   

Burgerless Evolution

Posted on March 17th, 2026

Dave!The first non-meat burger I ever had was at Johnny Rockets in Santa Monica. I was in L.A. for work, staying at the lux Miramar Sheraton Hotel. Wanting something to eat, I wandered down the nearby 3rd Street Promenade and was draw to the smell of Johnny Rockets, a restaurant chain I had never heard of before. I was only a few years into being a vegetarian, and thought for sure that I would be ordering a grilled cheese with a side of fries. There just weren't a lot of vegetarian options at a hamburger restaurant, and that's what I almost always ended up ordering.

But there was something strange on the menu.

It was called "The Streamliner" and claimed to be vegetarian? How could I resist that when the smell in the place was so intoxicating? So I ordered one, hold the grilled onions, expecting the worst. Veggie burgers of the day were always either 1) made from unappetizing chunks of vegetables and mushrooms or 2) some soy monstrosity which had the texture of shoe leather.

Imagine my absolute shock to find that it was actually a delicious burger with a sublime texture. It was everything I ever wanted in a burger that was reminiscent of a beef burger, but without having to kill a cow. It was love at first bite, and I would be going out of my way to visit Johnny Rockets at every opportunity... announcing it to anybody who was reading my blog "Rockets, bitches. Rockets." And I did that for many years.

After a while I learned that the burger Johny Rockets used was called Boca Burger and though it wasn't the same, I found them in stores and started buying them to eat at home.

Then one day I went to the Johnny Rockets at the Maine Mall... minutes after landing and picking up my rental car at the Portland International Jetport in 2018... only to find that The Streamliner had been discontinued. Replaced with a gag-inducing "burger" that claimed to be a "black bean burger" but was unlike any good black bean burger I'd ever had. I was absolutely gutted. A once favorite food had been destroyed. I never ate at Johnny Rockets again.

Then a miracle happened. Burger King unleashed their "Impossible Whopper"... something I discovered on one of my many work trips to Las Vegas in 2019. It was incredible. And, because Burger King was everywhere, a lot easier to get than Johnny Rockets. And so there it was. No matter where I was traveling, I was ignoring local specialties and buying Impossible Whoppers. What a great time to be alive.

But then... something changed over the years.

The burgers tasted the same, but the produce would vary widely. Sometimes the burgers were perfect, sometimes you'd get wilted lettuce, unripe tomatoes, or stank onions, and the experience was terrible. And I started ordering the Impossible Whopper with cheese because otherwise they'd take it out of the tray instead of off the grill and it wasn't hot. If you ordered cheese, they'd at least microwave it so it was warm when you went to eat it.

So now I go to Burger King rarely, the experience having been ruined. I understand that Johnny Rockets eventually realized their mistake and are now using Impossible Burgers, but there's nothing local and it's just not worth going out of my way to get there. Not any more.

Buying burgers for home was equally depressing. Boca Burger was bought out by Kraft and utterly destroyed. Morningstar Farms was never great, but I preferred them over other options because usually burgers released by Impossible or Beyond were an inch thick and you have to choke them down.

But then I discovered Beyond Stack Burgers recently, and everything changed.

I don't stack them (because multiple burgers causes me intestinal distress)... but I do smash them. Not from frozen, but I microwave them for 30 seconds so they're smashable. It's important that you coat the food-turner with the oil that melts out of the burger first so it doesn't stick to the burger and destroy it, but the result is 100% delicious, and I eat them way more often than I probably should.

The fact that the burgers come 8 per pack, thus matching the 8 buns you get in a bag of buns is just a bonus.

So of course I'm now living in fear that Beyond Foods will go out of business or discontinue their Stack Burgers or "improve the formula" or some such bullshit. History has taught me it's an inevitability.

One of these days, I really need to try making my own burgers. Usually when doing this I find a recipe online that's close to what I'm looking for and adjust it until it's to my liking. But I have yet to find a recipe (or more likely a "copycat recipe") which is even remotely like what I'm looking for.

In the meanwhile, I'll just keep buying my beloved Beyond Stack Burgers and enjoy them while they last.

   

Eating Was Nice While It Lasted

Posted on March 13th, 2026

Dave!"Lower grocery prices on Day One."
—Some Lying Asshole

Yesterday after work I went to the grocery store for hamburger buns, bread, lettuce, and oat milk. I ended up forgetting the oat milk, so I wasn't able to have Captain Crunch Peanut Butter for dinner like I wanted, but I was able to have a Beyond Smash Burger, so it all worked out.

As everybody knows, grocery prices are astronomically high in the USA... and getting higher thanks to an ill-intentioned*, ill-conceived**, ill-planned***, ill-legal**** (haaaa!) war that's directly responsible for gas prices escalating which causes food prices to escalate even worse. That's on top of the fact that my local market in my small city already has high prices.

As I was standing there in the bread aisle, this is how my thinking went. "The buns I like are on sale, but they're still over $2 more than the cheap buns that aren't very good. Is it worth paying $5 for a package of hamburger buns that I know will make for a more enjoyable meal? I guess so. But damn." Sure, $2 doesn't sound like a lot, but it all adds up, which means I have less money to spend on something else.

I walk out of the grocery store having paid twice as much as I should have for a minimal amount of food, but am feeling grateful because at least I have the option to afford food. I'm betting a lot of people now-a-days would be grateful to have enough money to afford even the cheapest groceries available.

Somebody needs to study history. Starvation has always been a major catalyst for revolution, and we've got a serious problem which will only get worse now.

Especially if the next season of Ted Lasso sucks.

   
*You will never convince me that the "no more wars" president isn't actually starting a war to distract from the Epstein Files or his intent to suspend elections by encouraging a revenge terrorist attack on American soil. Probably both. More and more the Files reveal that he's fucking guilty of some heinous shit... and he can't afford to lose the mid-terms because it could flip the House and Senate, which would curb his insane power ploy to grift the country and stay out of prison. Or God-only-knows what else, since he's committing new crimes daily.

**Gas is already incredibly expensive. And, while the president doesn't set gas prices (despite the current president previously blaming other presidents for just that), a war with Iran... which controls the all-important Strait of Hormuz... would obviously directly affect gas prices. But he doesn't have to give a fuck, because the American people pay for all those Air Force One golf trips, not him.

***As in there was no planning at all. Remember when Hillary Clinton was mercilessly dunked for Benghazi? Well, thousands of Americans are stranded in the Middle East, Americans and innocents are dying, and the only thing the president can say about it is that "Things happened very fast." Jesus Christ.

****The president is Commander in Chief of the military, yes, but he does not have the ability to declare war, requiring the approval of Congress. You could even invoke his violation of the UN Charter given that this was not a response, but spun as a "preemptive strike" which is bullshit. Because either the president was lying when he said Iran's nuclear program was "obliterated"... or he's a dipshit who doesn't know what the fuck he's talking about.

   

The Fake is the Thing

Posted on March 9th, 2026

Dave!I honestly don't understand why the fuck people concern themselves with what other people are eating. Or, even worse, condemn people for their choices. A lot of times this comes down to "food influencers" shaming everybody for content. Telling people that their cheaper foods are garbage and they should be eating expensive organic stuff instead. Whether people can afford it or not. Or, in the case of truly fucking shitty "food influencers" (like the Queen of Bullshit Misinformation, "Food Babe" Vani Hari) dishing outright misinformation about food, and condemning methods of food production which they deems "bad" even though science may not support the claim. But influencers doesn't give a fuck. All they care about is the clicks for cash.

In my case, I simply don't want to kill animals to eat. Period. That's what guides my dietary choices. And, lucky for me, food options exist which help me achieve my goal. And, much to my joy, these options are getting more versatile, convenient, and delicious all the time. I am currently hopelessly addicted to Beyond Stack Burgers. I would eat them morning, noon, and night if the coconut oil content didn't cause me digestion woes. So instead I just eat them morning and night.

And, yes, I know what the fuck is in it. The ingredients are right on the package, so I don't need some shitty "influencer" to read them to me: Water, Pea Protein, Canola Oil, Refined Coconut Oil, Rice Protein, Natural Flavors, 2% or less of Methylcellulose, Potato Protein, Apple Extract, Salt, Pomegranate Concentrate, Vinegar, Lemon Juice Concentrate, Potassium Salt, Dextrose, Spices, Faba Bean Protein, Vitamins and Minerals (Zinc Sulfate, Niacinamide [Vitamin B3], Pyridoxine Hydrochloride [Vitamin B6], Cyanocobalamin [Vitamin B12], Calcium Pantothenate [Vitamin B5]), Vegetable Juice Color (with Beet).

And, yes, I know what the fuck the nutrition values are. That's printed right on the package too. The only problematic values to me are saturated fat (from the coconut oil) and the sodium (260mg).

But God-forbid I be allowed to make decisions for myself without somebody stepping in to tell me where I'm going wrong.

Lately I've been inundated with videos about why plant-based meats have "failed."

Most of it is the shitty fucking influencer brigade, praising people for finally coming to their senses by dropping horribly "unhealthy" fake meats and going back to real meat (mad cow, cancerous tumors, feces, steroids, and all). Because nothing screams "health" than having cow shit in your hamburger, I guess.

But the real story is more nuanced and interesting than that. Which is where actual journalism comes into play... like this story from Business Insider...

I'm glad they didn't leave out the fact that real meat is heavily subsidized by the government while plant-base "meat" is mostly left to fend for itself. This, coupled with the economics of scale, put fake "meat" at a disadvantage compared to the slaughterhouses. I'm happy to drive a (relatively) cheap car so I can afford my chosen diet (among other things), but a lot of people aren't. Though given the current high price of food, the extra money is a drop in the bucket compared to the total grocery bill which is hurting vegetarians and carnivores alike.

If "food influencers" truly gave a shit about people's well-being, they'd put their energy into advocating being able to afford food in the first place.

But that doesn't pay as well, so here we are.

   

Bullet Sunday 944

Posted on March 8th, 2026

Dave!I may be fucked up because the fucking clocks were fucking changed again, which is fucking rough because I'm hard at work on this fine Sunday, but don't worry about bullets... because an all new Bullet Sunday starts... now...

   
• For the Love of God, Make the Stupid STOP! Look, more people want us to go on permanent Daylight Saving Time than don't. Some of us are so fucking desperate to stop dicking around with the clocks that we're even considering permanent Standard Time (which is not a better option, but it is the only one you can make happen without getting the fucking dumbasses in Congress to ACTUALLY FUCKING DO SOMETHING). This is all so stupid. Just do it. Just make Daylight Time permanent and fucking MOVE ON FROM THIS BULLSHIT.

   
• Nacho! One of my favorite chefs is Saúl Montiel, who appears on Epicurious often. He's entertaining and a genius in the kitchen. Even when he's cooking with meat, I learn new things that I can then adapt into a vegetarian recipes. Yesterday I found that he recently made Perfect Nachos that are vegetarian from the jump. They look incredible...

Damn that looks delicious. No clump of stuff dumped on top of the chips, and when you grab one chip you don't take the entire plate of cheese as you would with cheddar. My next grocery order is going to include the ingredients for this bad boy. Best cooking tip you'll ever get from me... go to the Epicurious page and search "Saúl Montiel" to get more awesome tips than you can shake a spatula at.

   
• YOU FOLD IT IN! After Catherine O'Hara's passing, I'm seeing a non-stop parade of clips with her in them. But this is the first time I've seen her in LEGO. It's one of her most classic scenes...

Oh how I miss Schitt's Creek.

   
• Libarry! Every time I see the Obama Presidential Library in the news, I wonder what in the hell they were thinking...

The hideous Obama Presidential Library

I detest this design. It looks like a brutalist nightmare... lacking warmth, beauty, elegance, or architectural fluidity. It could have been so much more. I often wonder what type of statement these oppressive-looking monuments are supposed to be making. Whatever it is, this one feels opposite of the presidency it is supposed to be representing.

   
• Lanterns! It's interesting how James Gunn is trying his best to differentiate all the DC projects so they're not merging into sameness. And while I can't say that the concept for a cosmic-spanning character like Green Lantern to be trapped in a distinctly earth-bound scenario, I do appreciate that Lanterns is striving to be something different...

And then there's the rumor that Gunn wants to bail from his contract a year early because he feels at odds with his studio's new Paramount overlords. And wouldn't it be interesting if he returned to Marvel? Seems like Paramount would do just about anything to avoid that.

   
• NEWSFLASH: LLMs can unmask pseudonymous users at scale with surprising accuracy. For better or worse, I put my name on the shit I say. My name is at the top of the sidebar of every entry on Blogography. And my real name is used on all my social media as well. And, believe me, I struggled with whether or not I wanted to go that route. In The Beginning Times, it felt like more people were using a pseudonym than their real names, but I ultimately decided to skip past that. Who cares what I say? And then I got a reader showing up where I live, and figured I may have made a mistake (the threats were also having me re-think things). But now, decades later, it turns out that staying anonymous is a thing of the past. AI can unmask you with "surprising accuracy." I wonder if this will cut down on the number of people making "anonymous" threats? One can only hope.

   
• Frod! I think I shared this years ago. I bears re-sharing....

I do the same thing... for my cats.

   
• Denial Isn't Just a River In Egypt! Every time washed up, bargain basement Hercules homophobe Kevin Sorbo opens his mouth... it's either to say something shitty. Or work in movies like Meet the Spartans so he can kiss dudes...

Kevin Sorbo kissing a dude.

Kevin Sorbo kissing a dude.

That's it, Sorbo, put your back into it! Such a hypocrite. Lord what a piece of shit.

   
And now I'm going back to work. Feel sad for me since my circadian rhythm is fucked.

   

Beyond Beyond

Posted on February 26th, 2026

Dave!Yesterday I wrote about my... um... "experience" when I ate two Beyond Burgers instead of my usual one. In case you missed it, my "experience" was explosive diarrhea.

Am I discouraged? No. I will still be eating Beyond Burgers, just in moderation. The taste is too good to be true, and it's the best veggie burger I've ever had. Even if I can only eat them one at a time.

But what about their latest product? Take a look at this...

Beyond Steak Ad

Beyond Steak Ad

Beyond Steak Ad

I was never much of a steak connoisseur, even when I ate meat... 40 years ago April. Probably because, unlike hamburger, steak looked too much like meat. But I am interested in having something new, so I'll be giving it a try.

Once it's in stores.

Because right now it's only available in a 10/$100 at the Beyond Test Kitchen.

Which is tempting, because the reaction has been pretty positive...

I just worry that eating one will cause my ass to explode, so I'd rather wait so I'm not flushing $100 down the toilet.

Literally.

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Reeking of Deliciousness

Posted on February 25th, 2026

Dave!One Beyond Meat "Stack" Burger? Delicious! Wonderful! One of my favorite things to eat! Seriously, I like them better than an Impossible Whopper, which is something I didn't think was possible.

But two Beyond Meat "Stack" Burgers? I was Googling "Beyond Meat Burger diarrhea." And... oh yeah... that's most definitely a thing.

"Diarrhea after eating Beyond Meat is often caused by the product's high fat content (coconut oil), fiber, or specific, highly processed ingredients like pea protein and methylcellulose, which can cause digestive upset. Users reported symptoms like stomach cramps, nausea, and vomiting."

Well alrighty then!

Guess I won't be eating my "Stack" burger... um... stacked, because that was a never-ending experience I don't want to re-live any time soon. Fortunately my medicine cabinet was stocked up with Imodium. This is an excellent dieting tool. It forces you to eat only one. And if you can't resist and end up eating more than one, then you'll shit yourself stupid, thus you'll end up with the calories of less than one!

I gotta say, this is a crazy turn of events. For my entire life I've traveled the world eating dicey foodstuffs from even dicier places and was never worse for wear. But now I cook a veggie burger and end up glued to the toilet.

Say! Maybe Beyond Burgers could be used as a delicious colonoscopy prep! And now...

   
DO NOT READ BEYOND THIS POINT! YOU'VE BEEN WARNED! TOO MUCH INFORMATION FOLLOWS!

Do you want to know how I knew it was the Beyond Burgers causing my explosive diarrhea? It smelled like Beyond Burgers! My bathroom reeked of deliciousness! Kinda. I guess.

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Bullet Sunday 942

Posted on February 22nd, 2026

Dave!Insomnia has been kicking my ass, but I'm not letting that stop me... because an all new Bullet Sunday starts... now...

   
• Punch-kun! I ran across the tragic story of the macaque snow monkey "Punch-kun" because I still follow Japanese news. Punch was abandoned my his mother and took comfort in an IKEA stuffed orangutan named "Djungelskog." There were numerous photos of the poor little guy doing his best to find acceptance and love from a plushie...

Punch-kun and his Orangutan Plushie

Punch-kun and his Orangutan Plushie

Punch-kun and his Orangutan Plushie

Punch-kun and his Orangutan Plushie

But then, after days on his own, he finally got a hug from one of his troop...

Punch-kun and his Orangutan Plushie

So that's nice. Especially after the shit-show of a week we've had.

   
• Whither Pixar? When Onward was released in 2020, it was a turning point for me when it came to Pixar. With one exception, I didn't like any of these films. And I never really understood why. I never bothered to search my feelings to understand what it was about Pixar that was turning me off. Then this morning I saw this...

And there it is. The reason there's one exception to Pixar from 2020 onward? It's because I've been to the coastal Italian towns which inspired the film Luca. I have a personal connection to the movie because I can draw on an experience that I've had. It's also why I can like a movie like Elio, but not fall in love with it.

   
• Dave Smash! I've been a big Morningstar Farms fan since becoming vegetarian decades ago. I veered away to Boca Burger for my burgers because they had superior taste and mouthfeel, but after Kraft bought them out and fucked up the recipe, I went back to Morningstar Grillers. They aren't great, and you have to know how to cook them so the texture isn't awful, but at least I'm not gagging them down. And then... Beyond Meat released Beyond Stack Burgers...

Beyond Meat Stack Burgers Package

Now, I should say that Beyond does make an actual smash burger product, but they're not sold near me and aren't meant to be frozen (though you can), which means you have to eat them the day you open the package. The "stack" version always come frozen and are meant to stay frozen until used. Which means I don't have to eat them all after opening the package. But anyway... I found that I can get the Beyond Stack Burgers locally (well, 25-minutes away locally, but still). I absolutely love these burgers. A little high in sodium (260mg per patty), but not atrocious. They also cook weird, with a strange foamy residue in the pan, but the results are tasty enough when you smash them that I just don't care. As a bonus, Beyond has packaging that actually works... unlike shitty Morningstar Farms packaging which I hate, hate, hate.

   
• Thor Tells Jokes! I really want to see this standup as a special... where is Netflix when you really need them?

@thortellsjokes Tour starts now! Honestly best time of my life #comedian #fyp ♬ original sound - Thor Stenhaug

Hearing this makes me want to watch Hasan Minhaj: Homecoming King again. It's a highly personal work which happens to be very, very funny. And touching.

   
• The Dow! The Dow! This is an absolute banger...

I couldn't even watch the hearing because Bondi is a gaping fucking asshole. Instead of using her position to serve the American people and seek justice, she's conspiring to protect child predators. She's such a massive pile of lying fucking shit that any time she speaks I see red, so I don't put myself in a position to watch. Thanks to this video, I can see the highlights in a way that doesn't make me want to hide under my bed and start screaming.

   
• SANDIWARA! Given my love of all things Michelle Yeoh, I was thrilled when a friend shared this with me...

The comments having people saying this should be a Malaysian tourism video. I cannnot disagree. This definitely makes me want to visit Penang (I've only ever been to Kuala Lumpur in the country).

   
• Finalizada! Basílica i Temple Expiatori de la Sagrada Família... AKA the Sagrada Familia basilica, is finally nearing completion. After 144 years...

Fascinating. I've visited Sagrada Familia three times over a 20 year span. It never seemed like it was any closer to being completed. Now that we're so close, it feels like it might be time to visit Barcelona again. Not that I need an excuse... it's one of my favorite cities on earth.

   
• Sci-Fi Entertainment! This list isn't perfect, but dang if it doesn't make me want to re-watch every one of these films...

Even though I've already seen all of them more than once. Some of them many times.

   
And now back to needing more sleep.

   

New Flavor!

Posted on January 13th, 2026

Dave!Smartfood has come up with one of the most phenomenal popcorn flavors I've ever tasted.

I hope people are willing to try "Brown Butter with Sea Salt Kettle Corn" even though the photo of the flavor is a little scary. It looks like a slice of butter with sesame seeds hovering above a jar of gravy fat or something...

If you see it, you should give it a shot! Hopefully EVERYBODY will give it a shot so it won't get discontinued.

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Blogography is a place to learn and grow by exposing yourself to the mind of David Simmer II, a brilliant commentator on world events and popular culture (or so he claims). All content is human-generated with no shitty AI slop... unless I'm making fun of shitty AI slop, which is all the time.
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Thrice Fiction Magazine - March, 2011 - THE END
I'm co-founder of Thrice Fiction magazine. Come check us out!
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Visit DaveCafe for my Hard Rock Cafe travel journal!
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