What the fuck is taking McDonald's so long to roll out the McPlant veggie burger nation-wide?
It's been THREE YEARS. They can't get their shit together in THREE YEARS? And why in the hell would you debut it in Texas, of all places. It seems like the percent of the population who's vegetarian/vegan in Texas would be fairly low compared to other states...
This is so embarrassing.
Though... the only reason I give a shit about the McPlant is because it's closer to me than the incredible Impossible Whopper at Burger King. Otherwise, I'd be eating at Burger King all day long because not only did they release their vegetarian option nation-wide, but they did so years ago, and it's fucking delicious.
Deciding to treat yourself is something that's increasingly difficult to afford. But after the bad week I had been having, I decided to stop at McDonald's on my way home yesterday for a couple breakfast biscuits (hey, I'll eat vegan at home).
But instead of the delicious fluffy biscuit I've come to expect, I got a tough, chewy, mockery of a biscuit that was (literally) hard to swallow...
It's like COME ON. Why would you serve an overcooked, shitty biscuit like this? Especially when you're charging a butt-load of money for the privilege of buying one? It's as if restaurants are all too happy to serve crap food and make unhappy customers if it saves them 10¢ to just cook another biscuit. Well, lesson learned. McDonald's doesn't care about serving food worth buying, so I guess I won't.
And then there's this...
@bellatvnetwork Chipotle walkouts people walking out before order is complete if portion is small and Keith lee reviewed Chipotle portions @NoahGlennCarter #chipotle #keithlee #food #restaurant #burrito #burritobowl #funny #foodreview #foryou ♬ A mysterious scene of the near future like Blade Runner(994826) - The Structures
Keith Lee is the hero we need right now.
I stopped eating at Chipotle Mexican Grill a couple years ago for exactly this reason. Don’t keep raising prices only to give me less food. And, yes, I know that it's the individual restaurant franchise which sets portion amounts. But if enough people refuse to put up with it and enough people stop eating there, then Chipotle Corporate is going to have to do something.
So now I’m taking a pass on Chipotle for crap portions and McDonald's because I’m tired of getting stale fries and tough biscuits. That's on top of other restaurants that I gave up on long ago like Quizno's and Johnny Rockets. The only fast food I’m eating now is Burger King for their incredible Impossible Whopper (and onion rings)... and Wendy's for everything they offer that’s vegetarian-friendly, because it’s always fresh and tasty (PERFECT FRIES AND BISCUITS EVERY TIME!).
I’m happy that people are done with being taken advantage of by fast-food restaurants that are no longer worth it. Maybe they’ll get the message and stop expecting people to pay for their bullshit.
Blogging can't be dead... because an all new Bullet Sunday starts... now...
• CosMc's! McDonald's is going to take on Starbucks with a concept beverage shop they're calling "CosMc's." Now, I don't drink coffee, so I mostly don't give a shit about Starbucks, but I admit to being more than a little intrigued by CosMc's. Mostly because they don't look to be as coffee-focused (though there's a lot of coffee on there). When you look at the drink menu, there's plenty of cool-sounding beverages that I'd 100% try. Plus there's some food items I might like... and sandwiches I'd give a shot once I modify them to be vegetarian (why the fuck they can't put a single fucking vegetarian sandwich blows my mind). But, alas, I'd have to fly to Chicago and drive a while to get to the only
I WANT ME SOME McPOPS, DAMMIT! And all of those sundaes.
• SPEECH! I'm a sucker for a good wedding speech (here's a link in case TikTok is being a dick)...
@moorepictures Big brother toast + crown apple makes for a fantastic speech #brotherspeech #weddingtoast #funnyweddingspeech #funnyweddingmoments #funnywedding ♬ original sound - Brennan & Greta Moore
• NEWSFLASH: No joke: Feds discourage humorous electronic messages on highways Oh thank heavens. Because we have no bigger problems to work on. Guess what? THE ONLY REASON THAT PEOPLE PAY ATTENTION TO THESE SIGNS IS BECAUSE THERE'S A CHANCE THEY'LL BE FUNNY!
• Emmy! I don't give a shit about the Emmys. I really don't. The shows I love and feel deserve recognition rarely win, so what's the point in getting invested? As an example, Andor, one of the most remarkable shows to ever appear on television (and my favorite show of 2022) didn't win anything. Insanity. They gave it all to Succession, which is one of the shittiest fucking shows I've ever endured, and I remain dumbfounded that people love it as much as they do. But anyway... one show that I was happy to hear won again is Last Week Tonight, which is hilariously funny while also being incredibly disturbing. And John Oliver is a genius, as you can see in his post-Emmy appearance on Jimmy Kimmel...
He's a national treasure. By way of Britain. But now an American citizen.
• Nine Months to Make a Baby! I don't know if anybody else is following the drama that is the Royal Carribbean Nine-Month World Cruise... but it's been a lot. Remember just a few days ago when I was talking about the rough seas of the Drake Passage? The cruise just sailed that. And even though the people documenting the cruise were taken back by the strength of the waves, they actually look calm compared to what I remember going through. But even so, there's been flooding on the ship which has created even more drama. It's delicious.
• Inclusivity is Good! It's so fucking hilarious how assholes outrage farm over the stupidest stuff. Like Santa, who... SPOILER ALERT... is a fictional character, must be a white, able-bodied character. And if he's not then, HOLY SHIT, it's an attack on the REAL Santa! AND I AM GOING TO RAGE ABOUT IT AS IF IT'S THE MOST IMPORTANT FUCKING ISSUE IN THE WORLD TODAY! Well, if that's a pressing issue for you, then good. Because THE ENTIRE WORLD IS NOT ENTIRELY ABOUT YOU! (here's a link in case TikTok is being a dick)...
@dasiadoesit not.. all lives? #waronchristmas ♬ New Home - Frozen Silence
And it just gets crazier and crazier the deeper you go. People talking about how Santa is Nordic, so he has to be white and can't be anythng but white. AND IF HE'S IN A WHEELCHAIR, THEN HOW CAN HE DELIVER ALL THOSE PACKAGES?!? Oh... I dunno... THE SAME FUCKING WAY HE'S ABLE TO GO DOWN A CHIMNEY?!? Jesus.
• NERD! I gotta tell you... as a architecture nerd, I am finding the most amazing content on YouTube. My latest find is a show called How Did They Build That? and it's SO. FUCKING. COOL. Right now I'm on the second episode, which covers the Twin Copper Tilted Towers of New York, the Cultural Center and Library of Athens, and The Hive building of Nanyang Technological University of Singapore. It's glorious. I could watch this stuff all day long day after day...
If you're into this kind of thing, I can't recomment the Banijay Science YouTube channel highly enough.
Have a blogtastic day!
It's the day before I get so buried in work that I won't have time to blog, but you're in good hands today... because an all new Bullet Sunday starts... now...
• Omens! I finally got around to watching Good Omens 2 and liked it well enough... though it's a bit of a letdown after the incredible first season. It could very well be that the first season was so amazing that there was nowhere to go but down. But still... it didn't seem to hang together as beautifully as the original story. If you want to save yourself some time, here's a wrap-up of every episode of the series...
I may have laughed a little too hard at that.
• Asteroid Flight! I am convinced that one of the most important voices in film is Thomas Flight. I've brought up his YouTube Channel before, but with each new video I appreciate his takes on movies even more. On Friday I finally got around to watching Wes Anderson's Asteroid City. I didn't want spoilers, so I've been sitting on Flight's deep-dive into the film until I watched it. And last night was the night. It's as good as I knew it would be...
Having somebody explain why you loved a film as much as you did is a bizarre experience. I loved Asteroid City. I thought I knew what it was trying to say as a film. But it turned out I was only scratching the surface. Flight's attempt to put into words what he thinks Anderson was saying and what the film meant to him just makes me want to watch Asteroid City all over again.
• Pinball Wizard! I gotta say... I passed on this movie because it didn't look that interesting to me. But then I heard enough people saying that it was good that I ended up tuning it to Pinball: The Man Who Saved the Game...
And it is, in fact, pretty darn good. In surprising and unexpected ways. Streaming on Hulu.
• Make Mine Duncan! Fine people of the world, may I present Hajime Miura doing incredible things with a yoyo...
It's almost like he's defying physics or something.
• Mac Tonight! Big Tugg took an interesting look at McDonalds that was entertaining and informative...
I was surprised that Tucker didn't mention Mac Tonight, a moon-headed mascot from the 80's that I remembered being freaky and perplexing. I also remember a lawsuit. So I did a YouTube search to see what's going on there...
You can't make this stuff up. White supremacy? Animatronics? DOUG frickin' JONES?!? Real Life is SO weird.
• Heartless! Good Lord. They hired a great cast. Had an interesting concept. Staged some terrific action sequences. Went to some fantastic locations. THEN MIRED EVERYTHING IN THE MOST BY-THE-NUMBERS SPY STORY IMAGINABLE. Who in the hell is calling the shots at Netflix that Heart of Stone ever got made?
Is it too much to ask to get something that's not an inferior wannabe expensive Mission Impossible clone? And the absurdly silly AI computer's constant recalculation of the mission's chance of success is just fucking stupid and unneeded. Does the AI computer have God-vision to be able to calculate infinite variables of unfolding events like this? Why does every movie have to drop in some kind of AI computerized crutch to up the tension instead of just WRITING SOMETHING WITH ACTUAL TENSION? Having C-3PO, oops... I mean "The Heart"... saying "YOUR MISSION ONLY HAS A 35% CHANCE OF SUCCESS" means NOTHING and does nothing... especially if Gal Gadot is going to ignore it. "DON'T TELL ME THE ODDS, 3PO!" Everybody involved in this film deserves better than this stupid shit. Thank you Netflix for spending a ton of money on this crap while increasing our rates. Jesus.
• Irony Can Be So Ironic Sometimes! THIS JUST IN FROM THE "IRONY IS NOT DEAD" DEPARTMENT... Zachary Levi Criticizes Hollywood for Making Too Much “Garbage”.
And, on that happy note, I'm off next week for Hell Week. See you on the 28th!
When traveling in the winter... especially a place with the possibility of a notorious winter like Maine... I always add a day before and after my work dates so I can be sure I'll still make my start-time if there's a weather delay. This time I got my start-date too late to have much choice in my flights. This means there was no getting here a day early. If a problem pops up then I'm probably screwed.
So of course air traffic into Seattle last night was slowed down, which meant I'd be landing late and might miss my connecting flight to Boston. Then they moved up the flight to Boston, which made it even more likely I'd miss it.
Lucky for me, my arrival gate was right next to my departure gate and I managed to make it onboard ten minutes before they closed the door. Thankfully I didn't have to check any luggage.
After landing at Boston Logan International Airport, I retrieved my rental car so I could drive 2-1/2 north to the job site. But first? Breakfast.
Usually I just stop at McDonald's for an egg & cheese biscuit. They aren't great, but they are edible (unlike Burger King's shitty Croissan'wich). My biggest problem in eating at McDonalds is that most of them don't know how to ring up an egg & cheese biscuit. They ring up a bacon, egg, & cheese biscuit and remove the bacon. This is hardly fair because I end up paying for meat I don't eat.
But here in New England, Panera Bread restaurants are plentiful. This means I don't have to eat at McDonald's and can get one of Panera's "Egg Over Easy with Cheddar on a Brioche Bun"...
So far as breakfast sandwiches go, I've found nothing better...
All-in-all, my highest possible recommendation if you're near a Panera and are hungry for breakfast!
I had a few hours before work started, so I took a nap. Or, more accurately, I tried to take a nap. It was one of those bizarre situations where I was so exhausted that I was having trouble sleeping. No idea how that works, but it's incredibly frustrating.
And now... I'm at work.
Where the internet is broken, which means that this will have to be posted when I get back home.
Five hours down, eleven hours to go...
Home again home again... and just in time too, because an all new Bullet Sunday starts now...
• Mutants! The news of the week? Disney's offer to buy out 21st Century Fox's movie properties was approved by the shareholders on both sides. They still have to get regulatory approval, but it's expected there won't be any issues. And so? The X-Men, The Fantastic Four, and Deadpool franchises will be headed to Marvel Studios. Which means we might finally get to see a good X-Men film... and we hopefully won't get more horrendously shitty Fantastic Four films. Deadpool was done right (twice!), but he lives outside of comic book reality, so he won't require a reboot. He'll just comment about his new universe and move on. In all honesty, I don't give too big a crap about the mutant teams showing up alongside The Avengers and so-on... but I am beyond excited to see The Fantastic Four popping up everywhere...
There is so much potential there.
• Big Gunn! And speaking of Marvel Studios... they've cut loose Guardians of the Galaxy writer/director James Gunn over offensive tweets he made almost a decade ago. I have mixed feelings over it all. On one hand he has repeatedly apologized for what he said, explained that it was a poor attempt at being provocative, he has moved on, and he tries hard to not be that person any more. On the other hand though... the jokes(?) were about things like pedophilia and rape and really don't qualify as "jokes" at all, assuming that was the intent. They certainly weren't funny. But... is that worth losing the third act of The Guardians of the Galaxy over? In the end I'd have to say "no." It would be a different matter entirely if he actually was a rapist and pedophile... but he's not. He was just entirely too stupid to understand he wasn't being provocative or funny... he was just being an asshole. And if we're going to start firing people in Hollywood for being stupid assholes, at least half of the industry would be gone.
• Printables! Downloadable guns? Well that sure took less time than I thought.
• Roasted! The Comedy Central Roast of Bruce Willis was on tonight. It was raunchy, horrible fun as always...
But every time one of these comes up, I cannot help but think back to one of the best roast lines ever said. Sandra Bernhard was preceding Jeffrey Ross at the roast of Jerry Stiller. Jeffrey stepped up and said "Yeesh, I wouldn't fuck you with Bea Arthur's dick!"... with Bea Arthur in attendance. I had always wondered if Bea Arthur ever reacted to it, so tonight I Googled it. Turns out Jeffrey Ross has a story about that.
• McWrong! Ever wonder what happens when McDonald's wraps your Egg & Cheese Biscuit Sandwich inside-out? Here you go...
I was too hungry to throw it all out, so I tore off as much of the color as I could. Hopefully it's non-toxic in case I didn't get it all.
• Kurzge-wha?! And here's my new favorite thing of the moment on the internet the Kurzgesagt Channel on YouTube...
If you've got time to waste, here's the place to go.
And that's the end of that. See you next Sunday.
Today I finally made the time to have my winter tires changed over to summer tires.
My plan was to arrive just when the tire store opened because you can usually get right in. Except there was an accident on the bridge into town so I was delayed 20 minutes. By the time I finally got there, the wait was up to an hour-and-a-half, and it would have been faster for me to change my own tires at home with my emergency car jack and a lug wrench.
It was a bummer, but it wasn't the wait that bothered me.
It was the reason for the wait.
As somebody at the tire store noted, there was no skidmarks on the bridge. Which means that the car (van?) which crashed into a car (which then crashed into another car) never made any attempt to stop. Which means they weren't paying attention. Which means they were probably texting or changing their baby's diaper or cooking a steak, or whatever the fuck it is that people do when not looking at the road like they're supposed to be.
Apparently the distracted driving "no-texting" law that Washington State passed has done nothing to solve a serious problem that's only going to get worse. Which begs the question... how many people have to die before this starts being taken seriously?
And speaking of dying...
As I've said many times before, I love McDonalds... despite constantly taking shit for liking McDonalds.
My favorite breakfast is a McDonald's Bacon, Egg, and Cheese Biscuit, no bacon, substitute round egg instead of spongey yellow powder egg. I could eat them every single day because it's just such a perfect breakfast food. The reason I don't eat them every day is that A) McDonald's is a 20 minute drive from my house, and B) they are expensive as hell. But right now McDonalds is running a special where you can get two of them for only four dollars! So, naturally, after getting my tires changed I did not pass GO, I did not collect $200, I went straight to McDonalds for a late breakfast.
It was, as expected, delicious.
Except I made the mistake of looking up the Nutrition Facts for my breakfast while I was eating it.
We'll set aside the 80 carbs in two Breakfast Biscuits and skip right to the 2100mg of sodium... 88% of the sodium that you're supposed to have in a day. And saturated fat? 11g which is 106% of the recommended daily ammount!
Holy shit!
I've never been so grateful that McDonalds is 20 minutes away and their McBiscuits are usually so damn expensive, because I'd be dead if they were next door and, you know, affordable and all.
Except they are on sale... and I am driving over the mountains tomorrow... so it looks like I may be courting death once again. Curse you McDonald's and your delicious breakfast!
Grey skies are starting to clear up, because an all new Bullet Sunday starts... now...
• McDONALD'S!!! Imagine my shock when I ordered my usual "Biscuit with Egg and Cheese Only" breakfast sandwich while I was at McDonald's in Spokane this past week... AND THEY DIDN'T CHARGE ME FOR BACON THAT I DON'T EAT!
Every time I've ordered this in the past, they've rung up a "Bacon, Egg, and Cheese Biscuit" then hit the "minus bacon" button. That usually costs me $3.29 or so, which means I'm paying for bacon I'm not getting. This is not unique to McDonald's. It happens everywhere. Order a Chalupa Supreme at Taco Bell but want rice instead of beef? Most times they charge you for the beef, remove the beef from the order, then charge you extra to add rice. Want a Market Fresh Cheese Sandwich at Arby's? Most times they charge you for the beef even though they never put it on the sandwich. It goes on and on. Sometimes it's different... Taco Bell will have a "beef sub rice" button or Arby's will credit you 50¢ when they remove the beef... but this is rare. I am hoping that McDonald's is starting a trend that others will follow. It sucks to pay for something you're not getting.
• Abandoned. While I feel absolutely terrible about the people who are facing natural disaster, it's the animals trying to survive it that have touched my heart. Bad enough there are wild animals who will struggle... but at least they have a fighting chance. Abandoned pets left tied up to die, however? Not so much. This horrific, disgusting, barbaric, inhuman practice is the stuff of nightmares. Luckily, something is starting to be done about it. People who abandon pets in some areas are going to be prosecuted...
There is no punishment harsh enough for abusing, neglecting, or abandoning an animal to life-threatening conditions. None.
• Grands! Who knew that Pillsbury "Grands" frozen biscuits are actually quite decent... tasty and fluffy... when the "Grands" canned biscuits are a disgusting mess that have an acidic burnt oil aftertaste? Good to know for those times I just need two biscuits and don't want to waste food making a batch of my own...
I never thought I'd find biscuits I like better than homemade, but here they are. If you've only ever tried the canned crap, this is worth a look. They are more expensive, but worth every penny.
• Gay Cake! Well that explains it then!
That there are people out there who actually believe this shit just boggles the mind.
• It's Pickle Rick! One of my favorite programs on television is South Park. Trey Parker and Matt Stone have been at the show for twenty-one years and yet, even with a few missteps along the way, it is just as culturally relevant as it ever was. South Park may be a crappy cartoon... but it skewers current events and pop culture like nobody else can, and I consider it essential viewing. A newer show that I'm in love with, Rick & Morty, is gearing up to be every bit as significant as South Park. I can only hope that it lasts for 21 years. The latest episode, The Ricklantis Mixup, is exactly why. It masterfully parodies everything from police brutality to puppet politics, yet still manages to be incredibly entertaining...
If you've got a warped sense of humor and like cartoons and sci-fi, here's the show for you. Disturbingly brilliant in ways most shows could never be. Not bad for a cartoon which started out as a Back to the Future parody of Doc and Marty.
Until next time, stay schwifty.
It's a good time to be a McDonald's fan.
Like me. I loves me the McDonald's!
First McFried McPies came back...
Now McDonald's is rolling out Mc24-hour McBreakfast starting October 6th...
Can it be that the McVeggie McBurger going nation-wide is next?
Oh how I McHope so.
No.
Just no.
McDonald's has revived the Hamburglar as a full-on creeper.
As if having a frickin' hideous clown wasn't bad enough? Why would any parent expose their kid to this kind of horror.
UPDATE: Oh gawd. It's worse than I thought...
I’m dodging McD’s at every corner, keep tweeting #RobbleRobble, America! Time to grab more Sirloin burgers…
https://t.co/61Lhd61ey6
— McDonald's (@McDonalds) May 12, 2015
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