A couple nights ago I was laying in bed working while Jenny was sitting next to me watching television.

Jake hopped up on the bed. And looked confused for a second. He just stood there staring at us.

Eventually he walked to the other side where Jenny way laying, sat down against her like she was a back-stop, then started cleaning his butt. Jenny, like the trooper she is, seemed unbothered and just kept laying there watching TV. I was worried if I reached for my phone to get a photo that I might startle them, but nope...

Turns out he wasn't confused, he was just scoping out the best spot to do his business.

At least he wasn't leaning against me this time.

The Resurrection of Jesus Christ, which is celebrated on Easter Sunday, and the day of His crucifixion, which is celebrated on this day (oddly called "Good Friday"), are seen as the two holiest days in Christianity. Or at least they were. In modern times the holiest days are more likely to be seen as the day some politician won an election or the day a group of God's children lose their rights or freedoms.

As the years go on and I see more and more "Christians" promoting hatred all the while selectively preaching Scripture... well... it has me wondering Where has the Christ gone in Christianity? On the day we're to recognize His sacrifice, it seems fitting to ask ourselves "Did Jesus die in vain?" Because, Jesus Christ, a lot of people who profess to live by His teachings have abandoned His teachings.

If they ever truly followed them in the first place.

Rewriting a Bible you don't read to fit a narrative you choose to believe in more than you ever did a Savior feels more like sacrilege than faith, but this is hardly anything new for the New Testament.

Spectacular. IT'S SPECTACULAR!

Or should I say "It's fantastic?"

Not only should The Fantastic Four be one of the easiest comics to adapt to the screen, it should be a frickin' home run every time because the fundamentals of what makes the comic work are so grounded despite the crazy reality they live in. That's why the stories are so beloved.

The new Marvel Studios film finally... finally... starts with the concept of a familiy of adventurers who just happen to be thrust into the limelight as super-heroes once they get super-powers...

And perfectly cast, too.

Now was that really so difficult?

Apparently it was, because this is the fourth iteration of trying to make movies out of the franchise.

For Fantastic Four I guess fourth time's a charm.

I am warning you... do not ever sign up for a free trial of SiriusXM (it came with my car). They will never, EVER stop fucking calling you no matter how many times you tell them to stop. No matter how many times you block their numbers.

It doesn't matter if you have been working since 3:30am and are trying to catch up on sleep. They'll call. It doesn't matter if you're having dinner with friends. They'll call. It doesn't matter if you are in the fucking hospital visiting a co-worker THEY WILL STILL CALL AND NEVER STOP.

The other day I answered another fucking call from SiriusXM and just kept screaming "STOP CALLING ME! STOP CALLING ME! STOP CALLING ME!"

And I'll bet you money they will keep calling. This is one of the most repugnant fucking companies on the face of the earth. I hate SiriusXM with a passion that I usually reserve for people who kick puppies. Their non-stop harassment should be ILLEGAL. And if they will come back and say "It's not us, it's third parties selling our subscriptions!"

Fuck you.

STOP GIVING MONEY TO THIRD PARTIES TO HARASS PEOPLE. YOU ARE ENABLING THIS BULLSHIT JUST AS MUCH AS IF IT WERE YOU CALLING YOURSELF!

If I ever get any political power, I will devote my life to shutting down unsolicited calls of any kind. Companies doing this will be fined into oblivion and their CEOs publicly executed. Life is hard enough without these piece of shit assholes intruding on our lives no matter how many times we ask them to stop.

Well, after I split the difference between Daylight Saving Time and Standard Time so we don't have to fuck with our clocks twice a year. Priorities, and all that.

As I previously mentioned, I bought a couple Aerogardens because I wanted to grow my own herbs. The cost to have fresh herbs has escalated to unaffordability, so when Aerogarden when out of business, I bought two 6-pod units. Mostly for cilantro, rosemary, and thyme, but for fun I went ahead and planted some lettuce, tomatoes, and parsley.

Can you guess which seeds sprouted and which havent?

Here's hint one... LETTUCE...

Here's hint two... TOMATOES AND PARSLEY...

Sigh.

No cilantro. No rosemary. No thyme.

Oh... and I planted some spinach too. That also hasn't sprouted.

Guess I'll try again with the cilantro, but this time I'll soak the seeds for a few days to see if I can get them to sprout before planting.

In other news... I'll bet that butter lettuce ends up tasting delicious!

I have purchased so many scrub brushes, grout brushes, and an untold number of cleaners trying to get my kitchen tile and grout clean. All have been a waste of money. My kitchen floor looks filthy despite the fact that I'm always cleaning it.

I've been saving for a heavy-duty, Commercial Oreck Orbital Scrubber as a last resort. I was up to almost $100 when I decided to just put the balance on my credit card because it's hard to know if it will blow up in price due to tariffs or whatever. It could jump from $320 to $600 so better to just get it over with...

AND... boom goes the dynamite. Immediately noticed a difference. A few more scrubbings and my kitchen tile will look like new. But here's the real shocker... I bought a softer scrubber for my hardwood floors and it's amazing how good everything looks.

One of the best purchases I've made!

Cannot believe that I'm writing a blog post about a cleaning appliance. But that's my life now, apparently.

Spring cleaning may be in full effect, but I'm not letting that be my entire day... because an all new Bullet Sunday starts... now...

   
• Genius! Hearing that Val Kilmer has died was a real hit. I know that he's most famous for his roles in Tombstone, Batman Forever, and Top Gun and the like, but it's his earliest work in Top Secret! and Real Genius that I loved the guy for. Especially in Real Genius, because that role was a terribly fine line to walk. Had to be deadpan-serious while being hilarious. Had to be a genius while being relatable. Had to be aloof without being a fool. And he had to have enough emotional depth for a serious conversation that the entire movie hinged on. He made it look effortless. WARNING: This trailer inexplicably summarizes the entire film and spoils absolutely everything. If you haven't seen Real Genius I am begging you to watch the film before watching this...

I can't even guess how many times I've watched this movie. It is one of my favorites of all time. And it lead to my becoming a massive Val Kilmer fan. Rest in Peace, sir.

   
• DEATH TO NICKELS! Politicians who actually want to save money, instead of just pretending they are by lying about it, may want to ake a look at this video...

Look, I'm not advocating for a cashless society. I think that cash needs to exist because it takes money away from credit card companies and banks and puts it back into the cash registers of the retailers. It also ensures that people who can't get credit are able to make purchases. What I am saying is that cash needs to make some fucking sense. The system we have now absolutely does not. Kill the penny and the nickel and round to the nearest 10 cents. It'll all even out in the end.

   
• Not Your Average Television Series! I'm late to the party on Netflix's Adolescence, but holy crap is it riveting television. I am so accustomed to most child actors being pretty bad (with many being truly awful) that I never know how to react when there's one who is this exceptional in the role. The young actor playing the lead, Owen Cooper, is mind-blowingly good. How did they find him? Every episode is shot in just one take. And if that's the case... they not only had to find a kid who can carry the emotional weight of a very difficult part, but he had to be able to memorize all his dialog? HE WAS FOURTEEN YEARS OLD WHEN THIS WAS SHOT! THERE ARE ADULTS WHO CAN'T DO THIS!

Highest possible recommendation if you haven't seen it yet. Even the poster is frickin' perfect...

I'm now obsessed with how they managed to make this series. How long did the actors have to work on memorizing their dialogue? How much rehearsal was there? How did they map out these insanely complex shots? This is more orchestrated than a ballet! I can only imagine that there HAD to be some kind of improvisation going on that allowed the actors to inhabit their roles so if there was a bit of a screwup it wouldn't ruin a take. I've got one last episode left and am afraid of spoilers or else I would be Googling all these questions.

UPDATE: The final episode was not what I thought it would be, but one of the most important parts of the story. This will easily make my best television series of 2025 and should seriously be mandatory viewing for kids to watch with their parents. Mostly as a warning. But partly to show consequences for your actions extend beyond you.

   
• More Television to Love? THEY MADE A SERIES OUT OF THE MURDERBOT DIARIES?!??? ZOMG!

Thank you, AppleTV+!

   
• Three for Three? To me Star Trek, as a franchise, has been in the toilet for ages. The only thing I've really liked after The Original Series were a few Original Series movies, Lower Decks, and the first season of Discovery (which was phenomenal before turning to total shit). And then came Strange New Worlds, which I've been enjoying even more than The Original Series, which is unreal. And now we're at Season 03, which is looking every bit as good as the previous two...

It is boldly refreshing that the people currently in charge of Star Trek actually know what makes the concept work... but aren't afraid to push it into new directions.

   
• Still Standing! Need a distraction from the horrors of reality? This is a lovely little story...

In a day and age when small businesses are struggling, it's nice to see stories of some that are managing to push through.

   
• It's really difficult to not be a fan of Giancarlo Esposito. He seems like an incredibly nice guy that just happens to also be an amazingly talented actor. I'm really glad that he's being given such a wide variety of acting roles because if you saw him in The Residence, you know that he's more than the villains he's played...

I haven't seen Captain America: Brave New World yet, but I'm sure he was good in that as well.

   
• Lying for Dollars! I absolutely loathe these "food health experts" who have no idea what they're talking about. Or, even worse, they know, but tell lies anyway. Just look at this ignorant asshole spreading misinformation and bullshit about fucking teabags for clicks...

If all food everywhere is so terrible, then just eat shit! Eat your own shit! Because at least then you'd know it's "organic and healthy" and will fit your idiotic narrative of bullshit and lies.

   
And now for that final episode of Adolescence. Until next Bullet Sunday then.

As I mentioned a bunch of Caturdays ago, Jake has been acting like he's got a bit of arthritis or something that has him looking like he's having a tougher time moving around. I'll be discussing it with his vet, but in the meanwhile I'm building some things to help him out. Now that Spring is here, I can park outside and set up my garage wood shop.

I'm starting with stairs. The first of which will be to get up to my bed so he might have an easier time getting in and out. I've already built the stair frames and painted them. All that's left is to add the steps and screw in the rubber feet...

After this I've got a long list of "Cat Accessibility Measures" that I'll be working on. Mostly constructing small staircases for places that Jake likes to frequent. Like my desk, the stairwell shelf I built, and small storage room that he and Jenny hide in when people are here.

I am not, however, building stairs up to the kitchen counters. That can stay off-limits.

Today I had to drive over the mountains and back for work. When I was younger, these day trips were my normal. My friends and I would drive to Seattle and back to see a movie because the theaters are better there. But now? Yeah. I do not want to be doing this. I mean, it's no problem at all, five hours driving isn't very long. I think it's more psychological maybe?

But anyway...

I had three Coke Zeroes at Bahama Breeze with lunch, so I decided to make a stop once I was over the mountains at a mini mart to use the bathroom and get another Coke Zero and some cookies.

I am please to present a new feature here at Blogography...

I've been in my share of gas station bathrooms and am not scared easily. This one was pretty bad.

I didn't touch a damn thing. I peed, used the bottom of my foot on the handle to flush, then opened my trunk and used half a package of sanitizing wipes. Then wiped down my key fob and iPhone. Good Lord. I had to pee bad or else I would have backed right the fuck out of there. Thank God I can pee standing up!

Still... grateful to have had access to a bathroom.

If, in fact, that was where I was at.

Siri, the Apple digital "assistant," made me totally lose my shit today.

I needed to sweep out the garage, so I told Siri to unlock the front door instead of opening the garage door, as I'd be parking in the driveway for a while. Siri responded with "Your front door can't do that."

And I lost it. Totally and completely lost it.

I was screaming in my car... "CAN'T DO THAT? MY FRONT DOOR CAN'T UNLOCK? WHAT IN THE HELL DO YOU MEAN, YOU STUPID PIECE OF SHIT?!? YOU'VE UNLOCKED IT BEFORE, SO WHAT'S CHANGED? YOU HAVE GOT TO BE THE MOST WORTHLESS FUCKING PILE OF TECH TRASH SINCE MICROSOFT BOB! HOW THE FUCK DOES APPLE CONSIDER YOU TO BE A SMART ASSISTANT? YOU'RE THE DUMBEST ASSISTANT IN THE HISTORY OF SCIENCE! EVEN THOMAS MIDGLEY JR. WAS JUST EVIL AND NOT INCOMPETENT LIKE THIS. FUCK OFF... FUCK YOU... AND DEFINITELY FUCK APPLE!!!"

I would have kept going, but I was home already.

And here's the thing. Siri was listening to my rant the entire time. The rainbow glow was circling my CarPlay screen, so it was all recorded. Then it was assumably sent to Apple. And I hope they listen to it, because they've earned every fucking word.

There was good news to be had, however.

Ewan McGregor and Charley Boorman are back with another season of their Long Way... series on AppleTV+ where they take a big motorcycle trip together. It's always a wonderful adventure, and this time looks like no exception...

The thing that strikes me when watching the show is just how incredibly nice Ewan McGregor is to the people he meets. Never has an unkind word. Always willing to engage with fans. Never gets tired of chatting about Star Wars. All too often, big Hollywood stars end up being such assholes. It's so refreshing to see the opposite of that.

Especially on a show this good.

Which is well worth your time whether you like motorcycles or not.