Continuing on with my recent trip to Walt Disney World... I'm back to Real Life and am too busy getting caught up with life to blog... but never you fear, because an all new VERY SPECIAL WALT DISNEY WORLD EDITION of Bullet Sunday starts... now (and next Sunday, since there's too much stuff for just one!)...

   
• Hot Ones! Before we get down to it, I just have to share this amazing appearance by Donald Duck on Hot Ones. I love it when cool things like this happen...

   
• My Disney Experience App! One key piece of the Walt Disney Parks puzzle is their app. You use this app for absolutely everything from viewing all the plans you've made and managing restaurant reservations to ordering quick-serve meals and viewing attraction wait times...

It also tells you what's going on at the park... with things like parades, character meet-and-greets, and hotel activities at your fingertips. If you have a PhotoPass you can even view and download your photos. It sounds awful to be chained to an app all day long, but I love the thing. It's so remarkably handy. Especially for restaurant reservations. You get a push notification when your reservation is ready. You check in to confirm you got the notification. Then you let the app know when you're at the restaurant so somebody can take you to your table. It's just such a good experience. It's also cool how if you have a Lightning Lane MultiPass you can book another Lightning Lane after you scan in for the one you're at while standing in line. And of course you can use the app to gain access to the park and your hotel room. But there's something else that does this without having to take your phone out of your pocket.

   
• MagicBand+! A "MagicBand" is an RFID device that you wear on your wrist which allows you access to a number of things throughout your Disney experience. They used to be something you got free when you stay at a Disney resort, because it acted as a room key, park pass, and even a method of payment when your credit card is on file. But now you have to pay serious money to get one. Eventually "MagicBand 2" came out which looked more like a watch. Then, in 2022, Disney released "MagicBand+" which added interactivity with various statues throughout the parks and also had colored lights which would glow and change when you're near various attractions. Available in a slew of different designs, the new version is rechargeable so you can use it over and over. My Orange Bird band looks like this...

Full disclosure, this is not my first Orange Bird MagicBand+. These things are notorious for falling off your wrist, and that's what happened on Day One of my vacation. This is despite having a "BitBelt" on it to help it stay on (this is the third one I've lost). This is a common complaint, and it's more of an issue for some people than others. I honestly don't understand why Disney doesn't put a better clasp on them, because it's crazy stupid that my Apple Watch has never fallen off once, but the MagicBand+ falls off me with almost no effort. Fortunately, if you have an Apple Watch, you don't really need a MagicBand+. I was able to do everything except interact with the statues (which is kinda dumb) and look at the lights that flash during fireworks shows or in certain attractions. If you have a compatible Smart Watch, I'd take a pass.

   
• Resort Early Access! There are many benefits to staying at a Disney resort hotel that's on-property. It's so amazingly beneficial that I have long suggested to people that it's better to save money for an extra year to stay with Disney as opposed to saving money and staying at someplace cheaper outside the park. Though that's not as true now as it used to be because free airport transportation is no longer included. It used to be that you also got extra hours at night for a couple parks each week, but that perk is only available if you stay at one of the "Deluxe" properties now. What all Disney resort guests do get is 30 minutes early entry to all the Disney World parks. But the attraction you want to ride before everybody else may not be running until the park opens for everybody. Take for example the wildly popular "Slinky Dog Dash" roller coaster in Disney's Hollywood Studios. The line is open a half-hour early, sure. But it doesn't start operating until the park opens! So all you really get is to stand in line before everybody else and only have to wait 30-45 minutes instead of the usual 90 minutes. Still useful, but not as much as it could be.

   
• Worthless Events! I attended two of these. The first was Extended Hours at Disney's Hollywood Studios. Instead of having to leave when the park closes at 9:00, you get to stay until after midnight. It used to be that this was an incredible opportunity to ride attractions with very short waits. Ride "Tower of Terror" in ten minutes! But that's absolutely not true any more because Disney over-sells the event. Slinky Dog Dash was minimum 40-45 minutes for the entire event. Which is really shitty after paying a bunch of extra money. Half as long as during park hours, but not short enough to be worth the cost. The second event I got was the "Mickey's Not So Scary Halloween Party," which was also a bust. The intent was to go on rides while everybody else was watching the "Boo To You" parade. But the parade was canceled due to rain and, since this event was also oversold, ride lines weren't any shorter. You also have the opportunity to trick-or-treat for candy, but it's the same fun-size candy you get at a store, so it's definitely not worth the money. Kinda sad that Disney is overselling these things, because they used to be something worth paying for. Now they're just not.

   
• Keys to the Kingdom! I hadn't been on the "Keys to the Kingdom" tour in a while so I decided to do it again. This tour takes you behind the scenes of Walt Disney World's Magic Kingdom. You get stories about how the park was designed and made. Trivia about various Easter eggs around the park. And an exclusive look at the "Utilidors" (service corridors) that are beneath the park...

The Utilidors are incredible. They allow garbage to be pulled out, stores and restaurants to be replenished, and employees to get to their posts... all without being seen by guests in the park. If you've been on all the rides and are looking for something new and different to do, I recommend the 5-hour tour. The price is very reasonable for the amount of time you get, and you also get to skip the line on a couple of rides! It's my second favorite non-attraction thing at WDW (after the "Wild Africa Trek" in Animal Kingdom).

   
• Character Moment! The character meet-and-greets are really well done. Most times they find people who are really into playing the character they're representing, and they're great with the guests. Sometimes the actors are better than others, but at no point do they outright fail. At least not that I've seen. Where the failure came to me was when I saw Ariel (The Little Mermaid) appearing in the app, and Disney felt the need to qualify it with "Ariel (From the Live-Action Story)...

And it's like, come on. When Belle from Beauty and The Beast appears, they don't tell you that it's "Belle (In Her Peasant Dress)" instead of Belle in her more famous princess dress... or tell you whether it's Belle from the animated or live-action movie... so why is it necessary to qualify Animated (AKA WHITE) Ariel from Live-Action (AKA BLACK) Ariel? They are both equally valid Ariel characters! I can only guess that they wanted to head off complaints from parents who would be all "THAT'S NOT ARIEL! MY CHILD WANTS TO SEE WHITE ARIEL!" or whatever. Disappointing.

   
And tomorrow we'll resume with even more Walt Disney World commentary.

>Continuing on with my recent trip to Walt Disney World... "Nothing can stop us now! I'll tell ya how, we're gonna make it happen! Let's take a ride. And spend a day in the countryside!"

Continuing on with my recent trip to Walt Disney World... Over at Disney's Hollywood Studios, they have opened Mickey & Minnie's Runaway Railway in the old Grauman's Chinese Theater replica. It opened in 2020, replacing the boring The Great Movie Ride (in Disneyland they built a new building in ToonTown)...

The concept of the ride is that you are going to the theater to watch the latest Mickey & Minnie cartoon... Perfect Picnic. There's not much to the queue, but you do occasionally get rotating digital posters for other Mickey & Minnie cartoons...

As you are watching the Perfect Picnic cartoon, an accident in the cartoon causes the screen to explode, allowing you to step inside the cartoon and board the train that Goofy was driving in it. But, uh-oh, the train comes un-hitched from Goofy's engine car, and away you go. From there you go through various scenes as Mickey and Minnie try to get your train car under control so they can continue on to their perfect picnic. Overall, it's a very well-done attraction that's pretty entertaining. So much to look at as you ride through, which makes it good for repeat viewings. A far, far better use of space than The Great Movie Ride it replaced. Let's sum it up, shall we?

The Bad...

• Reliability. The thing is always breaking down. I think it was down every day I was at Walt Disney World. Once it broke down while I was in the queue, for which I received a Lightning Lane good for everything except what you'd want it to be (Slinky Dog Dash and Rise of the Resistance). When I returned, the part of the ride where you watch the start of the cartoon and the screen explodes wasn't operational, and you just walk through the exploded screen (robbing you of the entire premise, which they are announcing over the speaker system).
• Unnecessarily Trackless? The ride cars are trackless, meaning that they can move entirely independently of each other and the ride itself. But there's only two times that this really comes into play. The first is when Goofy's engine car drives off without you. The second is when you somehow end up in Daisy Duck's dance studio and your car starts dancing with her instruction. Everything else feels very much like it could have been on a track. That's a bit of a bummer, and I really wish they had more space to take advantage of it.

The Good...

• The Style. I love, love, love the 2-D style of the new Mickey & Minnie shorts. It fits the characters flawlessly and is so much fun. Plus they're original white again instead of Caucasian, which means they're more relatable to more people. And the other characters look incredible too... Daffy, Pluto, Goofy... it's all amazing. And the way that they turned the 2-D animated characters into 3-D animatronics is darn good too. The whole ride is beautifully appointed 2-D turned into 3-D and I love it.
• The Music. I swear, I have not stopped hearing "Nothing can stop us now! I'll tell ya how, we're gonna make it happen! Let's take a ride. And spend a day in the countryside!" in my head since the first time I rode it. The tune they sing is a total bop, and it's so great that they put some thought into it to make it so memorable.
• The Location. Putting a movie ride in a movie park (and a cartoon ride in a cartoon land for Disneyland) means that the ride actually makes sense for where it sits. This is something obvious that's very quickly disappearing as Disney craps out intellectual property anywhere they can cram it in.

Continuing on with my recent trip to Walt Disney World... The last time I was in Orlando was September, 2019. The month prior to that, Star Wars: Galaxy's Edge opened at Disney's Hollywood Studios. It was wildly popular. I figured that I would avoid the park entirely and just wait a few months because I was returning in April of 2020. Surely the crowds would die down by then! But then the pandemic happened, and it would be five years before I returned to see it.

The land is still wildly popular and crowded. Existing on the planet "Batuu," the location is called "Black Spire Outpost" and takes place during the sequel trilogy timeframe. Its story says that it was once a vibrant, thriving place but eventually became a kind of backwater trading port that's home to smugglers and sketchy outlaws. AND KYLO REN?? Who is out recruiting visitors to become First Order operatives and trying to root out Resistance spies...

There's also places to shop and eat. My favorites being the Batuu Outdoor Market with little stalls that have souvenirs, and Oga's Cantina, a very cool bar where I got my Smiling Loth Cat Tiki Mug. The entire land is very well themed, and it feels like a physical place. Which is about all you could want as a Star Wars fan.

There are two major attractions in the land...

Millennium Falcon: Smugglers Run...

The story of the ride is explained in the queue and goes something like this... The Falcon is on loan to Hondo Ohnaka by Chewbacca so that he can steal some energy cells from The First Order to help The Resistance. Hondo (which is a fantastic animatronic) is accompanied by the droid R5-P8 (both characters are from The Clone Wars animated series)...

You are recruited to pilot The Falcon to do the job. As you work your way through the queue, you get to look down at The Falcon, which is awesome because it means Disney actually built the entire exterior instead of what you can only see from the ground...

And it's not just the outside, when you finally make it to the actual ride, you're literally inside The Millennium Falcon!

Once you're in the cockpit with five other people, you're divided up into six versions of three jobs... Pilot, Gunner, or Engineer. The pilots are easily the best job. If you're seated on the left you move the ship left and right, if you're seated on the right you move the ship up and down. Gunners and Engineers just press buttons that light up. You're trying to hunt down a flying transport train to blow it open so you can steal the goods. Let's recap, shall we?

The Bad...

• Pilot Error. You all have to work together to get the best score. And some people aren't suited for flying a ship at all. Or, if you're me, you've never done it before. I've played video games, which helped, but it would take 3 or 4 runs as pilot before I'd be any good.
• Mash Them Buttons. It gets worse... the Gunners and Engineers have their control buttons to their sides, but all the cool stuff is happening out the cockpit window to the front. You kinda have to use your peripheral vision to watch for buttons to light up so you can press them. If you don't and just look at your buttons, you'll miss absolutely everything happening on the ride. If you just look out the window, you'll not know when to press stuff. Because of that, I liked pilot best, but it's a high-pressure job because so much is riding on your skill to drive the mission, which cuts the fun a bit unless you've got five other understanding people flying with you.

The Good...

• The Story. Everything going on is nicely planned. It feels plausible within the framework of the Star Wars Universe.
• The Characters. The animatronics for Hondo Ohnaka and R5-P8 are fantastic.
• The Ship. Imagineers did a phenomenal job making you think that you're actually in the original Millennium Falcon. So very, very cool. Every Star Wars fan's dream.

   
And then...

The other ride is Rise of the Resistance. And it's stunning. The first time around, anyway. Basically the idea is that you're recruited by Rey and BB-88 to rendezvous with General Leia Organa. You'll get there by boarding a shuttle with a bunch of other recruits. In a very cool sequence, because the shuttle then blasts off the planet (you see yourself leaving Batuu when you look out the windows). Alas, you're captured by Kylo Ren. You then get forced off your ship to be herded into prison cells to await interrogation. But then... rescue! You're put into droid-driven cars to get you to the escape pods. A wild adventure ensues.

The Bad...

• Reliability. I rode this, then went to ride it again thanks to my having got Extended Hours at Disney Studios. It broke down before we ever made it to the shuttle. Time waiting in the queue utterly wasted, with no Lightning Lane ticket for your trouble. And the ride goes down all the time. They need to drastically look into fixing these constant breakdowns.
• Busted. There are parts of the ride that broke early on and have never been fixed. At one point you're in your car riding past a big space battle as blaster canons fire above you. Except the motion of the cannons is broke. So your car is stopping, reversing, and starting to avoid cannons that aren't even doing anything. It's pretty shitty. The parks are making millions. Fix the damn ride.
• Viewpoints. If you get a good spot, you actually see things that you won't if you don't get a good spot. On the shuttle it's entirely possible to be shoved against the wall where you can't see the ship taking off... or see Mon Calamari in the command center. You may not even know what's going on. Once you're captured and inside the ship, there's a big battle in an AT-AT bay. Where Finn(!) is there to help rescue you. Except if you're in the wrong car or in the wrong spot of the car, you might not even see him.
• The Minor Animatronics. When you are in a room with an entire legion of stormtroopers, you're shocked at first. But then you see that only a couple of them are moving, and the movements are minor. They rotate their head a little bit or whatever. It's kinda silly. More movement would have really sold it, because you spend too much time staring at frozen figures and it doesn't work.
• Re-Ridability. The only reason to re-ride this thing is because you got bad spots and didn't see stuff. Otherwise it's not such a thrilling experience that you'll want to spend 60-90 minutes waiting to ride it again. The best thing about the ride are the massive sets that are shocking to behold when you are first exposed to them. The scale of it all is mind-blowing. But once you know what to expect? There's just not much else there. I did end up riding it twice (on another day since it was busted during my extra hours event), but the second time was kinda meh.

The Good...

• The Shuttle Takeoff. It's simple, but effective. The only thing that could have made it better would have been to have a rumble floor or something to sell the illusion harder.
• The Concept. The idea of you being captured by The First Order, and how they build the story around that is pretty cool.
• The Scale. When I say that the massive scale of some of the sets are mind-blowing, I really mean it. You get deposited into a room that's so huge you have a tough time wrapping your head around it. That's an amazing achievement.
• The Main Animatronics. The Admiral Calamari and Kylo Ren animatronics are stunning. Sure the Kylo figure has a derpy moment when a hole is blasted in the room (he looks like his feet have been nailed to the floor and it looks crazy-stupid) but they're great. Other figures like Finn don't have great movement, but at least they are always moving.
• The Effects. The effects that are working are pretty good. Some of them look expensive (like Kylo Ren coming at you as his lightsaber ignites, which is some kind of screen/practical lightsaber hybrid) and some of them look simple and inexpensive (like Kylo Ren's lightsaber plunging through the ceiling to cut a hole for him to get you). But none of them look cheap (except the ones that are broken, of course).

   
Overall, I'm quite happy with the job they did on Galaxy's Edge. If you're a Star Wars fan, it's an experience to savor. There are things which could have been done better, sure. But for what it is I'm impressed. I actually wish I would have had more time there so I could have eaten at Oga's Cantina. And maybe Docking Bay 7 and Ronto Roasters too. And I am still hoping for another attraction to draw me back so I can eat there one day.

UPDATE: I was curious to know how they managed to get so many people through the queue on Millennium Falcon: Smugglers Run, because the ride only hold six people at a time. I ended up on a Reddit page which had a map that explains it, and I am completely blown away. Turns out there are not six people riding at a time, there's ONE HUNDRED AND TWENTY! (plus there looks to be two ADA-compliant cockpits, so I guess it's actually a max of 132 riders possible?). There are four turntables with seven cockpits each. At any given time, one of the cockpits per turntable is loading while one is unloading while five are riding the ride. GENIUS! Just look at this...

While in the ride I guess I remember that there were people standing in different parts of the holo-chess room, I just didn't think about it much because we were waiting there to get in the line at the cockpit door. Even if I did realize it, I would have sworn there was just one cockpit behind each door! This actually explains a lot, because they have groups of riders stacked up at each door at all times. Not because they're just being "ready to go," but because they are constantly loading new groups as the turntable rotates into position. I don't have the words for how smart this is. They can keep a steady stream of guests riding and yet the guests really have no idea what's happening unless they Google it like I did! Kudos to Disney Imagineering!

Continuing on with my recent trip to Walt Disney World... Despite liking the attraction overall, I was disappointed that Mickey and Minnie's Runaway Railway didn't take full advantage of their trackless cars.

But Remy's Ratatouille Adventure does, and it's a pretty brilliant ride. Finally giving the France Pavilion the great attraction it deserves, it's located in back of the original pavilion structures...

The story of the ride is that you're shrunk down to the size of a rat (while riding in rat vehicles, natch) and get dropped down a skylight into Gusteau's restaurant where evil Chef Skinner chases you and Remy around trying to catch you. Your end goal is to escape and make it back up to Remy's rooftop restaurant, Bistrot Chez Rémy.

Not much else to say except I love the attraction. So let's recap!

The Bad...

• Missing! I rode this four times trying to see everything (thank you Lightning Lane Multipass!). It wasn't until the last time that I realized I had missed part of the ride the previous three times not because there was so much going on (except there is), but because the rat car I happened to be in was at an earlier position. In rides 1-3 I was late to all the scenes. It's not critical stuff, so no big loss, but it was fun to see things I didn't previously (but wish I had).

The Good...

• The Story! While the how of you shrinking to rat-size isn't clear, it really doesn't matter. Once you're dropped into the restaurant you're trying to escape... and characters from the movie are there. Alfredo, Colette, Emilie, Pompidou, and of course Remy and Skinner. The ride makes sense within the framework of the ride and the movie. Refreshing.
• The Cars! Trackless vehicles and the ride actually relies on them being trackless. You regularly peel off from the other rat cars in interesting and seemingly random ways where more of the attraction is revealed to you. It's absolutely brilliant, and feels more frantic and chaotic to match the energy of the ride. They're also shaped like adorable rats, so... bonus!
• 4D! You wear 3D glasses because there's screens where part of the story plays out in very good 3D. But there are times you end up in 4D as well. You drive through a kitchen storage pantry where giant food ingredients are there. You run under a gas oven when the flame turns on and get blasted with heat. You drop into the kitchen and the scent of cheese and bread (I think?) are blown at you. You hide under a cart and and the giant wheels on either side start turning when you move. A mop gets flung your way and water sprays at you. It's all just so wonderfully well done.
• Delay! Now, as I mentioned in my only "bad" bullet above, the last time through I saw some things I didn't see because I was previously late to the scene. On that run, it felt a couple times that our vehicle was delayed. Maybe it was because I was there longer since my rat was first to arrive, but I don't think so. But here's the thing... if there was a delay... the ride didn't freeze up. Instead it seemed as though the scene I was in got extended. There's rats opening a bottle of champagne in your direction. On my 4th time through, the rat opening the bottle stopped and took some deep breaths several times before the cork popped. That didn't happen other times. Which makes me think there was a delay unloading vehicles or something, so things got backed up and our scene was extended on the fly. This is incredibly cool. And should be the future of attractions like this.
• The Queue. You're on the rooftops of Paris at night with a big Gusteau's billboards in the background. And you get to look in windows and such as you make your way to the load platform. It's beautiful. And sets up the ride in a really good way.

Continuing on with my recent trip to Walt Disney World... When I was in Orlando for work in 2017, Pandora: The World of Avatar had not yet opened. I was a month-and-a-half too early. But I was expecting good things. Years prior you could see construction of the "Floating Mountains of Pandora" (AKA "The Hallelujah Mountains," from one of the most cringe scenes in the movie when Norm pumps his fists and is all "YES!" in a moment so fucking embarrassing I seriously worried the actor would never work again). In 2019 the only parks I visited were Magic Kingdom (for a haircut and a veggie dog at Casey's Corner) and Epcot (to eat dinner in Italy and Morocco). NO PANDORA FOR YOU!

But anyway...

Here we are seven years later and I finally made it...

Now, I'm not exactly sure what "Pandora" (not the bracelet) is supposed to be. I think that, like with Star Wars Land, once you cross the threshold into Avatar Land, you're actually supposed to be on Pandora. The attractions certainly make it seem that way. When you're on the Flight of Passage ride, they say you're connecting to an avatar body not across the galaxy, but kilometers away. But unlike Star Wars Land, where there's a good transition to the area, Pandora is like... right there. You pass Pizzafari, walk across a bridge, pass a giant seed pod (or whatever it is), and BAM! Welcome to Pandora. Not a big deal, of course, but it feels like a disconnect.

I did not get to see Avatar Land at night, but apparently that's a great time to see it because things light up and look amazing. I wanted to see what I was missing so I Googled photos people had taken. And, yes, it does indeed look impressive. Next time I'll have to check it out.

But anyway...

You're in a Na'vi village with places to eat and shop for souvenirs (all expensive, some ridiculous). Plus experience two attractions.

The first is Na'vi River Journey. You board a boat and float down a Na'vi river. Hence the name. Along the way you get to see creatures and plants and stuff that makes Pandora so cool. Except the ride is just so... bad. It's boring and less impressive than just watching Avatar. I like the idea as to why it exists... you can experience Pandora at night in the daytime... and I appreciate that. But yikes. Here we go...

The Bad...

• Boring. Seriously. You don't do anything but float and look. There's no story. There's no adventure. There's nothing to do. You're just sitting there. In some ways it's less exciting than It's a Small World.
• Screen Hell. There are a grand total of two Na'vi animatronics. TWO! One waves at you as you enter and is silly. One is singing to you as you leave and is phenomenal. And while there are physical fake plants and some simple physical creatures around (like seeds of Eywa and those spinning lizards) all the interesting stuff is on frickin' screens. That alone makes this attraction pretty bad. They should have filled the thing with animatronics and made it worth your valuable time. It's pretty sad when Elle's Energy Adventure had a more exciting ride-through because at least the creatures you saw were real (well, not real-real, but animatronic-real).

The Good...

• That Na'vi Priestess Animatronic. I mean, seriously. Wow. It's gorgeous. So fluid and realistic-looking. If they had six more of these on the ride... plus some cool animatronic animals... this ride would have been a total banger. As it is, I don't know that this one thing makes the entire attraction worthwhile. Probably. If the wait isn't too long. But there's really no need to ride it more than once. And that's a serious problem. They should refresh this for its 10th anniversary in 2027, because yikes.

The other ride, Avatar Flight of Passage, is the complete opposite of all that. This one attraction makes the entirety of Avatar Land worthwhile to exist. You visit a scientific facility where you are linked with an avatar that is making a flight on a banshee. You then get to experience what the avatar is experiencing, and the way they make it all work is really cool and about as convincing as you can get until there's a big leap in technology. You put on a pair of "flight goggles" (3D glasses), climb on a link saddle, then get put in the middle of a 3D movie as your link saddle does its best to convince you that you're actually riding a banshee. It's pretty great. Unlike Na'vi River Journey, this one is worth your valuable time...

• The Logic. There's some things that don't make sense and are not addressed. It was my understanding from the movies that once a banshee gets linked and bonded with during the Na'vi right of passage, they are bonded with for life. If the rider dies, then the banshee will never bond with anybody else. Which is to say that everybody in the ride queue with you... day-in and day-out... are linking with the same bunch of Na'vi over and over and over again? Don't they get tired? If that's the case, humans must have a very limited sequence of DNA in order to link with them because surely there's a limited number of avatars and banshees available. I dunno. I'm probably over-thinking it, but I've read the Avatar books that explain all this stuff in detail and it seems like Disney and James Cameron could have done more to make this make sense.
• Discomfort. The link chairs are not exactly comfortable. Especially for me because I have a bad ankle. You're supposed to keep your feet flat on the floor while being bent forward, which is something my right foot just can't do because I injured it ages ago skydiving. I did it (in pain) while the cast members made their walkthrough, but then bent it so I wasn't crying through the entire ride. And I don't get it. There's absolutely no reason that you can't bend your foot! You're locked in, so it's not even a safety thing. Although I'm guessing that's what they'd say. I was worried that they'd kick me off the ride if I didn't so I tried to comply at the start, but it was so unnecessary. They should install pegs so people with mobility issues can at least be comfortable.

• The Tech. This is essentially a version of Soarin' except everybody is sitting on their own link chair. And those chairs are great. They move well. And they frickin' breathe! Once you're linked to an avatar, you feel what they feel and that involves the banshee breathing between your legs. They really sell the illusion of flight and it's a lot of fun.
• The Movie. The 3D film is what's going to make or break the experience. Fortunately, it's incredibly well done. The 3D is subtle so there's not weird moments where things are unrealistically punching you in the face. The flight path you take is thrilling. There's moments where you land and take in the view that keeps it feeling real. And, most importantly, it really looks like you're on Pandora.
• The Pre-Show. The queue is nothing special. But once you enter the pre-show chamber, they create a great illusion that sells what you're going to experience. Rather than just making you stand on numbers without any attempt to make it make sense, you're standing on them to get scanned so they can find a compatible avatar. You then have to go to the corresponding link chair so that you're linked with the correct avatar that you were matched with. It's a more immersive way of getting people assigned their seat than you usually see.
• Re-Ridability. Even if the experience wasn't so amazing, you'd probably still want to ride it again because the movie is so wonderfully detailed. There's stuff going on that you'll miss the first five times you ride it.

They really need to get on another attraction for Pandora so they can take down River Journey and fix it. It's a real sore spot in what could be a top-tier experience.

Continuing on with my recent trip to Walt Disney World... I'm going to go out on a limb and say that Guardians of the Galaxy: Cosmic Rewind is my favorite of all the new attractions I rode. It's an immediate classic because it's so well done and so entertaining. If Disney is going to fart IP over absolutely everything, I hope it's as thoughtfully done as this. I went in expecting it to be another Rock 'n' Roller Coaster Starring Aerosmith being an indoor coaster with music... but walked out feeling like I had been slapped across the face. In a good way.

Which is not easy for me to say for two reasons...

1. It replaced Ellen's Energy Adventure, which I really liked (hey, at least the dinosaurs were actual physical animatronics instead of being crappy screens like Na'vi River Journey).
2. The attraction goes against the concept of Epcot's "Future World" which was to explain how the planet is moving into the future in a realistic way, focusing on the land, the seas, the body, energy, transportation, and the like. About the furthest it strayed was Journey Into Imagination, but even that was designed to show how dreams and imagination can be harnessed to build our future. This ride attempts to explain it away, but it really doesn't. Everything about it is fiction with no basis in reality.

But anyway...

You enter the "Wonders of Xandar" pavilion to learn about the planet (featured in the first Guardians of the Galaxy film) and the queue actually reflects that. There's exhibits and recordings and stuff all about Xandar to entertain you while you stand in line. Then you get transported through a jumphole to actually visit Xandar when, oops, a Celestial shows up and steals the Cosmic Generator to travel back in time and erase humans from existence. Just as the Celestial hops through the jumphole to the past, The Guardians show up and tell you that you will have to chase after him and retrieve the Cosmic Generator if you ever want to make it back to earth and, you know, keep existing. You board an evacuation shuttle to follow the Celestial and chaos ensues.

Not a lot for me to be critical about, but let's recap, shall we?

The Bad...

• The Location! In the queue you learn that Epcot was chosen as the location for the Xandarian outreach pavilion because it was Star-Lord Peter Quill's favorite park as a kid (especially the "Universe of Energy" pavilion, which is hilarious given that this ride replaced it). But it's completely against the whole idea of what Future World is supposed to be about, and seems so badly out of place. Unless they're going to shoehorn in IP stuff everywhere else as well. In which case Epcot is out of place in Epcot. In all honesty, I think the intellectual property mandate is going to really hurt the parks (some IP is good, but they need to remember that the attractions can also create IP... like Pirates of the Caribbean and Haunted Mansion did).
• No Bradley Cooper and Vin Diesel? I don't get this at all. Even if they were unavailable when filming was done, they could have easily recorded their dialogue any time after because they play CGI characters. I don't know why they wouldn't want to contribute to a Disney attraction, but I guess that's possible? More likely Disney didn't want to pay them. Regardless, Cooper is sorely missed because Rocket isn't Rocket without him. I really do hope that eventually he gets to re-record the voice so the character feels authentic.

The Good...

• The Track & Cars! The track is laid out very well and is buttery smooth. Almost unbelievably smooth. This is something that people who don't generally like rollercoasters might be able to handle because it's Just. That. Smooth. It's got two launches and they're integrated beautifully. Launching coasters are my favorite, and while this isn't the most thrilling... it is tied with my all-time favorite (the Incredible Hulk Coaster, which was the first launching coaster I rode). Plus the cars you ride in can rotate so the ride can maximize available space by having you look in the direction they want you to look.
• The Story! The fact that rollercoasters are being given stories now makes them so much more interesting. And when the story is good, it adds an entirely new level to the usual dips, loops, and spins. The whole ramp-up pre-show is great, but it's the way it's faithfully continued during the actual ride that makes the attraction so amazing. If I have a criticism, it's that it resolves too quickly but, hey, you're on a rollercoaster, so that's not something that can really be helped!
• The Music! Paying homage to the films, you get some incredible 80's tracks to listen to as you're zipping around the cosmos. And which track you get determines the feel of the ride. The first time I rode it we got I Ran by Flock of Seagulls, and it was by far my favorite. It fit the story they're telling so well, and the beat really hit as you run through the story. Everybody Wants to Rule the World was a bit more chill and gave an entirely different vibe to the ride, which is why the re-ridability is off the charts. Blondie's One Way or Another also worked really well, and there were parts of the ride that it fit so beautifully. There are six different songs total (and I'm sure they'll get swapped out at some point), and you can't help but want to hear them all.
• The Characters! With the exception of Rocket, who could have really benefitted from Bradley Cooper's voice, it was very cool to see the entire team represented. Not just on the ride, but the queue. Drax steals the entire show every time he appears, but everybody has a good part to the story to play. Which leads us to...
• The Pre-Show! Not only did they somehow get Glenn Close to reprise her role as Nova Prime (in a huge pre-show part to the story), they also managed to get Terry Crews as a new character to inject some humor into the attraction. As if that wasn't enough, the pre-show has two parts with a very cool transition which sells the illusion of having been teleported to a ship in Xandar orbit very well. The queues and pre-shows for rides are incredibly important, and this is my favorite since Back to the Future: The Ride.
• The Length! In an age when Disney coasters are clocking in under two minutes, Cosmic Rewind is a blissful three minutes twenty. Any attraction under three minutes needs to be seriously re-evaluated, and I'd argue 3-1/2 should be the bare minimum. If you include the queue and pre-show, the ride feels even longer than it is, which is how it should be.

UPDATE: I didn't understand how the entirety of a high-speed coaster could fit in the old "Universe of Energy" pavilion, and guessed that they must have expanded it out the back somehow. So I ended up Google Mapping it. Turns out that the old building (in green) it merely the queue, pre-show, and loading area. The actual launch for the ride shoots you into another massive building entirely (in blue)...

Interesting to note that the launch takes you over a service road! Also interesting is that the building looks at least five stories tall. Maybe six. That, folks, is how you get an indoor coaster to last over three minutes! And be incredibly entertaining!

Continuing on with my recent trip to Walt Disney World... Well today's entry didn't go as planned.

What I wanted to do, just for fun, was have Adobe Photoshop's "Generative Fill" tool put Mickey Mouse ears on my cats as I continue writing about my trip to Walt Disney World. And that was going to be the entire post today. Two photos and done. What can I say, it struck me as funny.

So I drew a lasso around Jake's head and opened up the Generative AI Fill dialogue so I could ask for "Mickey Mouse ears hat...

But Adobe wasn't having it, and I got an error telling me that there was something wrong with my prompt...

No matter how I tried to get around it by using other words, Adobe AI would refuse to give me what I want and instead gave me crazy stuff like this...

I'm assuming, there was a copyright issue, because what else could it be? This is hilarious when you consider Adobe was happy to train their AI tool by stealing from a bajillion people's work. But big companies like Disney have lawsuit money, so I guess Adobe has gotta do what they gotta do.

Eventually I gave up and just did the Photoshop job myself...

I picked photos which I thought represented my cats and their reaction to having Mickey Ears on their heads. Pretty much perfect.

No thanks to Adobe Photoshop Generative Fill.

Just one more reason to loathe AI, I guess.

Continuing on with my recent trip to Walt Disney World... You only thought that I shot all my Disney World bullets last week, but it's just not true... because an all new VERY SPECIAL WALT DISNEY WORLD EDITION of Bullet Sunday starts... now...

   
• Monsoooon! Because I've been to Orlando dozens and dozens of times over the years, I've been here at all times of year. But hurricane season is always the time that can be a bit dicey. One top of an actual hurricane (which I've experienced twice) that can shut down Walt Disney World (which I've experienced once), you usually get some showers in the afternoons. But sometimes you can get these torrential downpours that make it impossible to be out and about. On the Sunday I was at Magic Kingdom, we had one of those. And it was a rare sight indeed to see the park empty as everybody went running for cover...

Though every once in a while somebody would be running around...

   
• Weather! The thing about visiting Walt Disney World in the Summer is not just the hurricanes that can pop up, but also the unrelenting heat and humidity. I don't mind the heat, but the humidity can really get to me when it's on top of the heat. Which is why I don't mind it when there's a sprinkle or overcast clouds. On top of cooling things off a bit, you also get prettier photos...

Cinderella Castle really pops when it's not trying to compete with the glare of the sun!

   
• Send in the Drones! Rumor has it that Disney is looking into using drones as an alternative to fireworks for some shows. This is not surprising, because of the cost and environmental impact that big fireworks shows have are not great. There have been a few drone shows in the past, but the first big show I'm aware of is the Dreams That Soar show at Disney Springs. It's very well done, and some of the 3D objects that are created are incredible to behold (I'm looking at you, WALL-E and EVE). There's also a Star Wars segment that's pretty special...

Drone entertainment is just going to get better and better. Will it ever truly replace fireworks? Probably not. But given the benefits to both Disney and their guests, it's only a matter of time before we start getting drone shows in the actual parks.

   
• Secondhand Mickey! My first watch was a Timex Mickey watch that I loved. Eventually it broke, and I've always wanted a replacement. So imagine my surprise when I saw that Fossil had a new take on the old watch that was being advertised on Facebook! Except two problems. A) The price? FOUR HUNDRED DOLLARS! and B) What the heck is going on when the placement of that second hand?

Nigh pornographic. Which I'm not opposed to, of course. But I am a bit hesitant to spend FOUR HUNDRED DOLLARS on something which such a bizarre design to it.

   
• Country Bears Redux! The Country Bear Jamboree is an original Magic Kingdom attraction that proved so popular that it was duplicated in both Disneyland and Tokyo Disneyland. And while the Disneyland version closed over two decades ago (necessitating "Bear Country" being renamed "Critter Country"), Disney World's version kept chugging along. Until Disney finally decided to update it, reopening the attraction this July. The bears got new costumes... and new songs. This time countrified versions of Disney movie classics like You've Got a Friend in Me from Toy Story, A Whole New World from Aladdin and Kiss the Girl from The Little Mermaid. Fortunately, Baby Oscar is still in the show, except he has a hat and no longer has his teddy bear (Mayer!) that he squeaks at the end of songs. I think it's a Big Al plushie? I dunno...

Surprisingly, the new take on a classic attraction really works! It refreshes something that was badly outdated and makes it into something new. It's essentially a sing-along for the kiddos who know all those Disney songs by heart. Fun!

   
• PhotoPass-Out! Disney has loads of photographers around the park ready to take your photo in all kinds of places with all kinds of characters that you can get with a PhotoPass. And I'd probably buy one if I had kids despite the insane cost (all photos from my week-long trip cost $209.99 and a single day is $74.99), but I don't care enough about it for myself to spend that kind of money (if my friends want to buy it, that's on them!). Except... if you get a Lightning Lane MultiPass, you get your ride photos included. You also get your photos if you go on a tour that has them (like Wild Africa Trek). Sorry, but you still have to pay for your character photos with Mickey Mouse & Company. But anyway... PhotoPass has some serious problems. First, for two days during our trip there were only a handful of photographers available (no idea why), and they asked you to take photos with your phone. How bad is it to pay $209.99 to take your own photos? Second, for really popular spots, there are no photographers but an automated camera in a box that randomly snaps photos that simply cannot take the place of a real person. Third, I cannot imagine that a lot of people are paying the hideous cost to buy their photos. Instead they shoot with their phone (like we did) and pay nothing. But Disney is still paying all those photographers and still taking all those photos that are never purchased. If my PhotoPass was half the cost... say, $99... I would have totally bought it! I bet a lot of people would. If it was half the cost would they make double the money? I dunno. But I'll bet they'd make at least the same money with a lot more happy guests. Fourth, the app and website where you manage your photos is terrible. I tried multiple times to download the photos on my phone. I deleted and re-installed the app three times. Never could do it. Instead I had to you the website, which has massive problems of its own. Just look at what happened when I downloaded them...

Not only could PhotoPass be a massive perk for guests if it were affordable and worked well, I think it could be more profitable for Disney as well. But it would take a commitment to improvements that I don't think Disney would make given that they just announced a bunch of other expensive projects. And it's a shame, because PhotoPass is a brilliant idea that I think park guests could embrace more than they have.

   
• Competition! Big changes are underway in Orlando, and the new Universal Studios Epic Universe park opening up next year is driving much of it. Disney finally had to react by announcing a bunch of new stuff for Walt Disney World at D23 just last month. But it's not just their local competition that Disney has to worry about. There's other parks around the world that will be eating their lunch if they allow it. One of the biggest that I've not yet been to is Europa Park in Germany. Recently there was a fascinating documentary released which goes behind the scenes and gives you a look at what it takes to run one of these things. If you enjoy theme parks, it's worth a look...

Makes me want to have several billion dollars so I can dust off the plans for my Daveland theme park and Daveland Resort and build them!

And that's the last Disney Bullet Sunday for a while. Only a couple more Walt Disney World entries to go!

Continuing on with my recent trip to Walt Disney World... The last time I was in Orlando for work was September 2019. Before that I believe it went 2017, preceded by 2015, preceded by 2014? It's hard to remember because those pre-pandemic years all blend together (but are easier to remember than the period from 1990 to 2003 when I was going 3 to 4 times a year).

The Seven Dwarfs Mine Train attraction opened in 2014 in Magic Kingdom. Which is to say that I had four opportunities to ride it when I was there, but by that point I was so burned out on Walt Disney World that the only reason I'd go to the parks for was a haircut or to eat (mostly at Epcot's World Showcase, but sometimes I'd go to Magic Kingdom for Casey's Corner or Disney Studios for Sci-Fi Dine-In Theater or 50's Prime Time Cafe).

This time I finally made time to ride it.

Which is tough because you either wait in the Standby Lane for 60 to 90 minutes or you have to pay $12 for an Individual Lightning Lane to skip the wait. But, hey, at least you have the option to wait in line (unlike Tiana's Bayou Adventure, Guardians of the Galaxy: Cosmic Rewind, and TRON: Lightcycle Run). The ride is to the right of the castle across from The Many Adventures of Winnie The Pooh...

The ride itself is pretty cool.

The Bad...

• Length. I'm going to put this in both the Bad and Good columns. It's bad because it's under three minutes, but it's good because at least it's not under two minutes. If you've waited 90 minutes to ride or paid $12 to ride, that's not a great return on your investment.
• Price of Admission. Whether you're paying with your valuable time or paying with actual money, there's a cost to ride this attraction. I'd argue that any time you have a wait that's over an hour on a ride that you're overselling tickets to the park, but that's just me.
• Not Everybody Can Ride. When I rode it the second time, the car ahead of me had a couple on the large side trying to ride. They couldn't fit. At first I thought it was because the woman's backpack wouldn't fit on the floor because she was futzing with it and I was going to tell her that I'd set it at my feet... but that wasn't it. She couldn't get the lap-bar to lower far enough to engage. I don't know if it's because the two of them together were too big or it was just her... but she was understandably upset and on the verge of tears. What's worse is that the cast member couldn't accommodate them ride-swapping where one rides while the other hangs out with their bags, then they swap. It's not one big seat that two people sit in but two individual seats side-by-side. This is really unfair. And before anybody comments with "IF SHE WANTED TO RIDE, SHE SHOULD GO ON A DIET!" you should know that I've known people who live far healthier than I do... barely eating a salad for every meal and walking daily... that were very heavy, while I eat garbage and don't exercise and am thin. There's more to your weight than what you eat. But anyway... I don't understand why Disney doesn't have one car that's a single-wide seat which can be used by two people or one large person. Or something so that bigger people can ride. At the bare minimum they should have a "test car" out front like they do for TRON: Lightcycle Run so you can see if you can ride before standing in line 90 minutes or paying $12. Really bad form for Disney here.

The Good...

• Story. Imagineers took the time to make the ride make actual sense, which is nice. The segment in the middle which has you slowing down to see the miners in the mine actually mining is =chef's kiss= exactly the kind of thing I expect from a world-class Disney attraction.
• The Cars. Excepting the fact that they don't provide a cart which allows larger people to ride (as mentioned above) the way the cars swing from side-to-side is pretty cool. It's not a huge movement, but it's there and you do notice. Very cool.
• The Queue. A good chunk of the line is indoors and air conditioned. But it's better than that... they have interactive games and distractions you can play with here and there. Kinda nice if you're in line for an hour or more (especially if you have kids).

A second entry today as I live-react to the Apple Keynote "Glowtime" which was unleashed this morning (except I had to work so I am reacting after). No worries though... there's still some more Disney entries in the queue to finish out through Friday, but I didn't feel like waiting until next week when this entry is ready to go.

• Apple Watch 10: I’ve been begging for a thinner, lighter Apple Watch since Day One. So the Apple Watch 10 is right up my alley...

Except the blood oxygen tracking has been turned off because of the patent dispute mess Apple is in? I guess? I’d gladly upgrade, but not if this essential features are missing since that's a huge indicator of COVID infection. And also? Your color choices are Black, Silver, and Rose Gold. No Product(RED) color this time around. And look at these shitty, boring Sport Band colors! Holy crap what a morose and boring selection...

No thanks. I'll be sticking with my beautiful Product(RED) watch with the classy Product(RED) band. What a boring-ass design direction Apple is on. I hope this isn't a trend for the rest of the keynote, but I know better.

• Apple Watch Ultra 2: The version in black is gorgeous. And that titanium loop band is incredible. But the massive size of the thing (along with the heinous price) guarantees I’ll never be a customer.

• AirPods 4: I love my AirPods and use them all the time. All it took for me to upgrade from the originals (which I hated because they kept falling out) was the soft cushion cups in variable sizes that you get with the “Pro” model. And here we are again with the slippery hard plastic bullshit. I don’t give a shit how many ears that Apple “scanned” I will never buy any model which doesn’t have interchangeable soft cups to keep them in place.

• AirPods Max: I tried them. They were so fucking heavy and uncomfortable that I stuck with my Beats Pro (which would no longer charge after less than two years). Rather than addressing the comfort problem (and that absurdly stupid purse case), Apple just released new colors and updated the charging port to USB-C? WHAT THE FUCK?!?

• AirPods Pro: Oh boy. Health features. “Hearing Protection” is nice, but it shouldn’t take the place of proper protection, and I’m shocked Apple didn’t mention that AT ALL. — “Hearing Test” is a great idea though. Bravo. Though I have to wonder how accurate it is. Maybe it doesn't have to be, and is just accurate enough to let you know if you should seek help? — “Hearing Aid” is nice for people who need it, sure. But it seems profoundly weird that people would actually use these as hearing aids as shown in the keynote. Better to say that if you are already using your AirPods Pro, the hearing aid feature can help. I am confused if these are actually upgraded hardware... or if it’s just a new feature added to old models, which is what it sounds like? Dang does Apple need to pass these keynotes by a third-party to make sure they are understandable.

• iPhone 16: Everybody knew that "Apple Intelligence" (Apple's version of AI) would be a huge deal for future iPhone models, and here we are. And these non-Pro colors are absolutely gorgeous...

I am wondering for the millionth time why Pro customers don’t get colors like this? — The customizable “Action Button" has been a detriment to my iPhone Pro experience due to its placement. I keep hitting it when I think I’m pressing the volume-up button, because it's been in the top spot since forever. Apple put this button in a shitty fucking spot, and I wish they would have resolved that. But NOPE! Because this is Apple we're talking about. They stuck with that shitty fucking butterfly keyboard on MacBooks even after people complained and it wasn't until they started losing sales that they finally did something about that. — LOL! The new A18 chip name skips over A17 (which was used in the previous 15 Pro models) because marketing is dumb. — The display is still 60Hz? In the Year of Our Lord 2024?!? That is so frickin' embarrassing in a phone this expensive. It's the biggest flaw in an otherwise excellent phone.

• Apple Intelligence: ZOMG! CRAIG! WE LOVE YOU, CRAIG! I am leery of AI, including the Apple-branded "Apple Intelligence.” I think so much of it has been developed and utilized in ways that are pretty shitty. That being said, it sounds like Apple is going to at least try to protect your privacy and have some personalized features which rely on the Apple Ecosystem to be useful. I will likely not be using AI for my writing though. At least not initially. I’d rather something come from me rather than a computer interpreting me. I do like the idea of using AI to help sort through my bazillion photos to find what I am looking for though. That is a useful and smart implementation of AI. As is the summarization of an email in the message preview, which is very useful given that most people have no idea how to get to the fucking point. — Siri has been stupid for far, far too long, so it’s nice that it looks like the tech will be worthwhile now (hopefully it will spill over into Apple's HomeKit crap). — The "Visual Intelligence” demo to get info on stuff you see looks amazing, though I laughed my ass off when the guy ASKED FOR PERMISSION to take a photo of that dog, which is more than AI companies do! They don’t generally give a shit about permission, and just take whatever they want! — I am not commenting about “Genmojis" because I’m embarrassed to admit how often I will use this feature. — Not that any of this matters. None of this will be available until October sometime. Why Apple didn't delay their big AI-laden phone until the AI is actually available is likely due to hitting a calendar ship date to make shareholders happy. Screw the customers... it's the shareholders that matter. A strategy that worked awesome for Sonos!

• Camera Control: Absolutely shocking that non-Pro customers are getting this without having to wait a year like they usually do for Pro features. Anyway... I am one of those people who uses my iPhone for photos more than anything else. Making/receiving actual phone calls is WAY down on the list. So of course I’m always thrilled when new camera features are added. The new “Camera Control” has been a long time coming. Apple is taking ideas from DSLRs and I am totally here for it. This is an absolute game-changer for people who want more control when taking photos, but are tired of missing shots because you have to open a bunch of crappy menus to get to what you need.

• iOS 18: Messages via Satellite is intriguing to me. But I am not hearing about how much it costs? It used to be free with the purchase of an iPhone, but it always sounded like they would charge after a year unless you got a new iPhone. No mention of this?

• iPhone 16 Pro: Yep. There’s the "Camera Control" button. Nice. — Larger more durable display. Nice. — AND HERE WE ARE... boring, dead, shitty colors. Yet again...

Faded Black, Snot Smear, Dingy White, and Unhealthy Urine Stain. Exactly what I've come to expect. Not even a "Forest Green" or "Dark Blue" this time. And of course no vivid or saturated colors that I'd want. This is so fucking disappointing year after year after YEAR. The good colors are only ever available on the cheaper phones. What the fuck is the thinking on this? People who pay more money for their phone don't deserve nice colorways? — HA! Only a 15% speed bump over the phone I have now? Ummm... wow. At least it’s using 20% less battery for the 15% performance bump that I'll never notice, so that’s something, I guess? — But, hey, faster AI performance. I guess that's what Apple thinks is a priority now.

• iPhone 16 Pro Photography Extras: The ultra-wide-angle/macro camera is better, but it remains to be seen if that translates to photos which are actually better. So many times Apple professes that the new hardware will make for better photos, but you just don’t see it in real-world use, only in specific situations and conditions. Apparently the sensor reads are faster to reduce lag as well. No mention about any improvement to low-light photography. No mention about the selfie-camera. No mention about any fusion photo upgrades (except what will naturally come out of a slightly faster processor). — I do very much like the new real-time color-grading, which will help me make good decisions when composing a shot. And it sounds like you can apply this after the fact, which is awesome. — The video features are all great, but I don't shoot much video, so I likely won't benefit from these cool new features (including the awesome "Cinematic SlowMo")... especially the fact that you can adjust the speed after you shoot! Nice! — The audio recording improvements will likewise be lost on me, but I guess it's good to have that in those rare instances I shoot video.

• The Weeknd!: These real-world use cases that Apple unloads almost never apply to everyday iPhone users given the expensive gear that's needed on top of the high cost of the iPhone Pro needed to actually do this, but it's so great to see what is possible. Especially with this banger track from The Weeknd!

• MagSafe: Ooh! Looks like Apple users are finally getting a MagSafe speed bump that might be on-par with what other phones have had for a while now! Which is nice if I ever needed, but I always charge my iPhone overnight and the newer models have such good battery life that I don't worry about it. I often get messages that my phone isn't charging at full speed to help the battery because it knows I just leave it on the charger all night.

• Case Study: I've never had a third-party case work as well as what I can get from Apple so I don't even bother any more. And the addition of Camera Control almost guarantees that third-party will continue to be worse than anything you get from Apple. Fortunately we're at least getting three options that aren't total drab, boring, morose shit...

I will probably end up with "Ultramarine" because the yellow is not even a touch golden. Which is a shame, because a golden yellow case has always been one of my favorites...

Maybe I'll look at the case at an Apple Store to see if it's a little more golden than it appears on their site. Assuming I bother using the iPhone Upgrade Program to trade up. This may be the year I hold onto my phone a year and get to actually own it come September 2025! Depends on the use-case of the camera... because I likely won't bother unless the photos are better and "Apple Intelligence" is pitifully slow on my iPhone 15 Pro Max.

• Project(NOT-RED): I have to say... I am beyond disappointed that Apple seems to have ended their partnership with Project(RED). No (RED) Watches or Bands. No (RED) iPhones or Cases. No (RED) anything? Maybe Apple doesn't care about fighting AIDS any more? Maybe they will start to care if people start dying from it all over again because the cost of treatment keeps exploding and newer generations aren't taking good precautionary measures to not contract it?

And that's a wrap. Interesting, but nothing so essential that I am dying to upgrade. Especially given the color situation. Good Lord is Apple shoveling colorways that are even worse than they usually are! Nothing (RED) or even bright and hopeful is available for any product I would be interested in! Booo! BOOOOO, APPLE!

Continuing on with my recent trip to Walt Disney World... Before discussing the Disney Skyliner we have to go back in time to talk about how both Disneyland and Magic Kingdom used to have a "Skyway" that ran between the far-West side of Fantasyland and the far-East side of Tomorrowland. That may seem like a waste because the "lands" are right next to each other, but it was actually a nice way to cover quite a distance on a crowded day. Literally half the distance of the park. Plus being able to have an aerial view of the park was fun. The Disneyland version even went through The Matterhorn which was especially cool.

Both Skyways were removed in the 1990's (along with the one that was in Tokyo Disneyland). There were all kinds of excuses given... too expensive to maintain and operated... metal fatigue for the posts that the wires ran across... sight-lines being ruined... or whatever. To me it was sad news because I always enjoyed the ride, and got to experience it at both USA parks.

So you can imagine my surprise when Disney announced that Walt Disney World would be getting a Skyway to help some resort guests get to the park? Branded "Skyliner," there would be stations at both Epcot and Disney's Hollywood Studios, which means two out of the four parks would be serviced. It would run directly to the Caribbean Beach Resort, the Art of Animation Resort, the Pop Century Resort, and the brand new ugly cracker box of a hotel... the Riviera Resort...

If it's easier for you to picture it on an actual parks map, here you go...

Map and Satellite Image © Google

I wanted to try it so I decided to stay at the Caribbean Beach Resort. I had stayed there before and enjoyed it, but that was before the Skyliner was built.

And there's not really much else to be said. Time for a recap...

The Bad...

1. Crowds. Despite the fact that the line moves fairly quickly, if you try to board after a popular event (like Luminous Fireworks in Epcot or Fantasmic! at Disney Studios) you will be waiting a while. There's not much Disney can do about it, but it's a big stopping point when it comes to usefulness.
2. Wraps (or lack thereof). Half the fun of getting on the Skyliner is seeing which Disney characters will be on the wrap around your bucket. And there are loads of different ones to be had. But... inexplicably... there's also buckets that don't have a wrap. They're just a plain color with no characters or art. And it's like WTF?!? Way to crush a little boy's dreams by giving him the most boring ride ever! Note: and by "little boy" I actually mean my inner child.
3. Hours. The Skyliner shuts down about an hour after the park's regular operating hours. Which is to say that if you have extended park hours, you will have to find another way home. And while I get it, this seems kinda weak. Why not extend the hours so that everybody can get home after the park actually closes?
4. Limited Network. Disney really needs to extend the network to more parks and places. Granted, this will likely increase wait-times to get on it, but it would make it a lot more useful to more people. And, if handled correctly, may even decrease times because more people would be able to be tied up in the network at the same time.

The Good...

1. Convenience. I requested a room near the Skyliner station and got put in the Barbados section. From there it was a quick walk to the station, and made getting to Disney Studios or Epcot a breeze because it was direct service (though you have a stop at The Riviera when going to Epcot, you don't have to get off). So incredibly convenient. Especially when you're trying to get there for your early-hour admission that comes with a Disney resort stay.
2. Speed. With no traffic or stop lights in your way, the timing is darn good once you board a bucket. Especially in the early morning where there's not much of a line and you can hop on without a wait.
3. Size. Unlike the old "buckets of death" that you'd find on the old Skyways, the buckets on the Skyliner can easily hold six people. This helps keep families together and can increase the capacity of the network so more people can get through it. This isn't treated like a "ride" it's more like a valid method of transportation.
4. Fun. I was onboard just as the fireworks were going off at Epcot and it was pretty cool to be able to look out and see what was happening as I headed back to my hotel for the night. Almost makes me wish I would have made an effort to time it better!

Continuing on with my recent trip to Walt Disney World... I've mentioned a few times how one of my most favorite things to do at Disney World is eat. I may not have always done attractions each time I had work there, but I did eat at the resort every single time. Not only are many of the restaurants, you know, actually good... they're also imaginative, unique, and fun too. Everything from a simple churro to a full-on gourmet meal can be had at the most magical place on earth, and they're all pretty easy to get to if you're staying there. Sure it can be an expensive prospect, but if you're careful it can be worth it.

My Top Twenty places to eat at Walt Disney World (that can accommodate my vegetarian diet and mostly don't force me into a buffet or fixed price menu) are here (keeping in mind that menus change, restaurants change, and all that... though I did try to double-check that if the name changed that I had the right place and food). Sorry if your favorite is not on here. Odds are it's just because I stopped going to WDW regularly in 2019 and have missed a lot!

1. La Hacienda de San Angel (Mexico Pavilion, Epcot) If you've ever been inside the pyramid in the Mexico Pavilion (likely to ride the Three Caballeros ride that's badly in need of a refresh... like what they did for Maelstrom when it became Frozen Ever After and is now a massive hit), you know how beautiful it is. Bathed in perpetual twilight as night is falling, there's a night market and restaurant that's lit up so beautifully. But the wonderful atmosphere would be worthless for a restaurant if the food sucked. Fortunately, the food is actually very good, and the drinks are top-shelf. On top of that, the staff works with you to have a great meal. I wasn't feeling the Huarache Vegetariano this time, so I asked if I could get the guacamole and chips without the meat and the Queso Fundido without the meat and our server was happy to accommodate me. That. along with their La Cava Avocado drink (which is sublime) and I was set for a fantastic dinner.
2. Tutto Italia (Italy Pavilion, Epcot). My favorite restaurant on the face of the earth is Alfredo's Alla Scrofa in Rome. They are one of two restaurants claiming to have invented Fettuccini Alfredo. The other one being Il Vero Alfredo, also in Rome. Back in the day, the Italy Pavilion at Epcot had a satellite location for Il Vero Alfredo, and it was a happy thing for me. Although some people didn't care for the place, I loved it and ate there many, many times. The restaurant closed in 2007 and was replaced by Tutto Italia. Not the same as the restaurant I loved, but still one of my favorite places to eat in Orlando. Their crispy potatoes, green beans, and pastas are all top-notch.
3. Spice Road Table (Morocco Pavilion, Epcot). Their hummus fries are to die for, and I have been known to show up and plow through three orders of them and nothing else (but they also have tiropitakia, naan with dips, and very good desserts). I wish there was a gyro/falafel quick-serve somewhere in World Showcase, but this will have to do.
4. Via Napoli (Italy Pavilion, Epcot). If you want pizza, this is your best option in the entirety of Walt Disney World. Imported ingredients from Napoli cooked into pizza that's about as authentic as it gets, and the price tag ain't cheap. They have non-pizza options, but not ones I can eat, so this gets knocked down a few pegs even though I eat here more often than Tutto Italia.
5. Toledo (Coronado Springs Resort Gran Destino Tower). This was the last WDW restaurant I ate at during my last pre-pandemic trip. I love tapas, and Toledo had some vegetarian options on the menu, so I gave it a shot by taking a trip to the (then) new Destino Tower at Coronado Springs Resort. The food will never take the place of eating tapas in Barcelona, but it was darn good fare, and I would absolutely eat there again.
6. Sci-Fi Dine-In Theater (Disney Hollywood Studios). While the food here is not spectacular, it is pretty good, and they are happy to make a veggie burger I can eat. But it's the amazing setting that makes this a truly special place to eat. Sitting in cars while you watch old movie trailers is fun, the staff is always great, and I have eaten here many times just for the experience of it all. This is how most restaurants in the Disney Bubble should be. An escape from the usual which is more than just the food you eat.
7. Boma (Animal Kingdom Lodge) The dining at AKL is an embarrassment of riches, and it starts with the Victoria Falls Lounge, which serves up tasty drinks (and amazing African-spiced nuts, if you're lucky). And that leads smack-dab into Boma. Yeah, yeah... it's a buffet, which I usually hate. But they always have many interesting and delicious vegetarian options, so I am willing to look the other way. The celebration of African dishes is fantastic, but if you have people in your party who are not that adventurous, there's some more standard options to be had. If you avoid buffets as I do, this one is an exception you should try.
8. Casey's Corner (Main Street, Magic Kingdom). Formerly I liked their veggie dog. But now I'm fixated on their Chicago-style veggie dog, which is how all hot dogs should be eaten anyway). Regardless, I'm just happy that they offer a veggie dog at all. Seating can be a struggle, but it's worth the hassle.
9. Kona Cafe / Captain Cook's (The Polynesian Resort) One of the things that makes the Polynesian Village Resort worth staying at (assuming you can afford the ungodly price) is that they have one of the best breakfast foods on the property: Tonga Toast! Which is banana-stuffed French toast that gets deep-fried. (I KNOW!) You can order it at two locations, but I'd go for Captain Cook's Quick-Serve because it's the same thing but significantly cheaper ($10.50 vs. $17.50!). Both restaurants have dinner options worth exploring too (except I've had better luck with vegetarian fare I like at Captain Cook's as well).
10. 50's Prime Time Café (Disney Hollywood Studios). They used to have a vegetarian shepherd's pie here years ago (at least I think it was here?) that I really enjoyed. But now it's just the tomato soup, cornbread, and apple crisp that has me coming back. Just like the Sci-Fi Dine-In Theater, this restaurant is themed to what I can only describe as "grandma's house" where you have servers who are happy to tell you to keep your elbows off the table and eat all your vegetables. Yet another example of how restaurants in the Most Magical Place on Earth should be designed.
11. Sanaa (Animal Kingdom Lodge) The bread service and samosas are excellent, which tend to make me ignore the fact that you get one vegetarian option for an entrée, but it's always been a darn good option (currently a vegetable curry that I'm sure is amazing). As if that weren't enough, the desserts are killer, and I've come here a couple times just for a couple sides so I can have it!
12. Earl of Sandwich (Disney Springs). I used to love this establishment, but then they removed my beloved veggie sandwich and I avoided it. Then they put it back on the menu and I was thrilled to be able to eat there again. Premium ingredients and that incredible bread that's toasted so beautifully... it all adds up to an amazing meal. The fact that it's priced (relatively) reasonably is just the icing on the cake.
13. Jock Lindsey's Hangar Bar (Disney Springs) Back when "Downtown Disney" became "Disney Springs," this Indiana Jones inspired eatery was opened. While I still mourn the loss of Pleasure Island and its restaurants and clubs (especially the Adventurers Club), I have to say that the Hanger Bar isn't half bad. It's certainly got a lot of Easter eggs for people who remember Pleasure Island and are deep into the Indy lore. The food is inventive and fun with vegetarian options I can always enjoy.
14. Jungle Navigation Co. LTD Skipper Canteen (Adventureland, Magic Kingdom) Based on The Jungle Cruise across the way, this is a fun restaurant that gets largely overlooked (which is strange because it's so big). They have some interesting vegetarian salads and entrées that are worth a look at the menu when I visit.
15. Les Halles Boulangerie-Patisserie (France Pavilion, Epcot) If you like authentic French pastries and breads, this is the place. They also have sandwiches, but the vegetarian option bounces around so I never count on it being something I'm going to want to eat. But when it is? Magical.
16. Basket at Wine Bar George (Disney Springs). An off-shoot of Wine Bar George, which is a place that I avoid because I'm not a wine drinker, Basket has a limited menu with some fantastic treats to be found. I made a trip to Disney Springs just pre-pandemic to order some just based on word-of-mouth, and was not disappointed.
17. Sassagoula Floatworks and Food Factory Scat Cat's Club Café (Port Orleans Resort: French Quarter). Apparently the beignets have moved, but if they're the same thing in Mickey shapes (using the same recipe), then great. This used to be the only place in all of WDW to get beignets, but apparently since Tiana's Bayou Adventure opened you can also get them at Magic Kingdom, except I hear they are not authentic beignets like you can get at Port Orleans Resort, so your mileage may vary.
18. Garden Grill (Future World, Epcot) This restaurant features produce that was grown in The Land which is to say that you're guaranteed some nice vegetarian options. Everything is served "family style" which is to say that it's best when you have fellow vegetarians who can share in the options available. Unfortunately (or fortunately, if it's your thing) this is currently a "Character Dining" experience. Which I don't object to (truth is that it's a fun experience which you should want to have in Disney World)... but I do object to the absurd price tag which comes with that. This ain't a cheap place to eat. But it is all you can eat so I recommend going in hungry so you can get your money's worth! I remember it when it was called The Good Turn Restaurant because it's a rotating restaurant which has views of the Living with The Land attraction where the veggies are grown. The food is good enough that I go back when I'm with people who I know will enjoy it. Otherwise the cost makes it a pass.
19. Yak and Yeti (Animal Kingdom) This isn't the best restaurant when it comes to selection for vegetarians (let's face it, few restaurants in WDW are)... but what they do offer has always been great. The problem is that Animal Kingdom Lodge is so very close, and I'd rather eat at any of their restaurants, so I don't end up here very often.
20. ABC Commissary (Disney Studios) While not the most inventive place to eat, I have been here more than a few times because I know that there will be something interesting for vegetarians to eat. I've had good salads, sandwiches, and burgers here that were all worth a stop.

A Quick Note on Tusker House... Animal Kingdom's Wild Africa Trek tour is one of my favorite things to do in the park. It's a more intimate, close-up experience than you get with the regular safari attraction. And the highlight is always lunch out on the savannah, which is prepared by Tusker House. My vegetarian lunches have been CRAZY DELICIOUS all three times I've taken the tour. So good that I was compelled to find the source and eat there the next day. Unfortunately, it's a buffet (which I usually hate) and a Character Dining Experience (which means it's expensive) which is to say it's not quite what I was hoping for. To make matters worse, the vegetarian ("plant-based") selections were not all I was hoping for. Even so, I've eaten here a couple times after just because I love African dishes so much. I think that the experience would be a much better one if you eat meat, so I thought I should throw it out there.

And a quick note about that hot dog at Casey's Corner... After eating a veggie dog Chicago-style while visiting The Windy City, I have a tough time eating a hot dog any other way. Miraculously, one of the two veggie dogs on the menu at Casey's Corner on Main Street is a Chicago-style dog! No poppy seed bun, pickle, or sports pepper, but it's darn close...

I just wish that A) It arrived hot, and B) They would keep the mustard inside the bun so you can eat it with your hands and not make a massive mess. Otherwise? This is your dream dog if you're a vegetarian.

If I were to add a 21st place to my list, it would probably be Fairfax Fare (Disney Hollywood Studios). There are many places to eat Mickey Waffles (my second-favorite thing for breakfast after Tonga Toast), and usually I recommend having them at your Disney hotel so you get a place to sit down to eat them. But if you want to rope-drop an attraction, you want to bypass your hotel so you can stand in line for a ride first thing. Then you can go have breakfast in whatever park you're at. Problem is... a lot of times there's no available seating because a lot of people have the same idea. At Disney Studios, Fairfax Fare is a good choice because there's plenty of seating...

The problem for vegetarians is that the waffles come with bacon. If you're at the park with somebody who eats it, that's fine. But if you're not, then you can tell them to keep it... but they don't credit you a buck or two. You pay the same price. Also? No butter. Syrup only. Still, good stuff.

With all my positive things to say, surely there must be some negatives (other than the cost and the fact you need a park ticket to get to many of the restaurants)? Well, yeah. Sadly, most restaurants don't have many vegetarian/vegan options in the name of efficiency. If you like the option they have, you're golden. But if not, then odds are they can't accommodate you because most restaurants don't allow you to customize their dishes.

Another negative for me, at least, is that I occasionally get dragged to restaurants that are widely considered among the best in Walt Disney World only to end up disappointed. Victoria and Albert’s (The Grand Floridian) is grossly overpriced and I didn't enjoy the food at all (though it's also nigh impossible to get a reservation because it has a coveted Michelin Star, so this likely won't even be an option anyway). The Hollywood Brown Derby (Disney's Hollywood Studios) is a restaurant that I was excited to eat at... only to find that the menu was overtly vegetarian-hostile. And the one entrée on the menu I could eat had mushrooms that they couldn't remove so I ended up with tomato soup. I used to love The California Grill (The Contemporary Resort) because the vegetarian options were incredible. But the last couple times I ate there I didn't enjoy myself as much as the price tag should have provided and the menu wasn't as varied as it was years ago. And, lastly, it's a real bummer that my most favorite of all WDW resorts, The Wilderness Lodge, used to have my favorite restaurants. But Whispering Canyon Cafe won't work with you to create vegetarian meals, leaving you only the awful vegan options that use gross fake cheese and meats... and Artist Point has been converted to a Character Dining experience with mediocre vegetarian options that's a far cry from the amazing menu they used to have when it was a restaurant. There's no place for me to eat at my hotel of choice, which is hugely disappointing.

Another negative is that many of the cart snacks are bad (though some, like churros, are fine). One day at Epcot I was hungry and our dinner reservation was a ways off. So I decided to grab a Mickey Pretzel that comes with a tub of cheese. Boy are these bad. The pretzels are tough and chewy instead of fluffy inside with a thin chewy shell. And the cheese tub your get is gloppy and gross. They are cute though...

Also... almost all of the Disney pre-packaged snacks suck SO bad. I had a bag of Chip 'n Dale pretzels that were stale and gross and sat like a lump in my stomach for hours. I had a Micky Mouse marshmallow crispy treat that was not even remotely "crispy"... it was gummy, tough, and so disgusting that I couldn't eat all of it and had to throw it away. Do you know how bad something has to be at Disney World that I toss it? Especially when you have to pay a shitload of money for it? Just... no. Bring your own snacks to not only save a ton of money, but have something you know doesn't taste like crap.

So I'm not ending this entry on a down-note, I should reiterate that eating remains my favorite thing to do when visiting Walt Disney World. There's almost always a plant-based option on the menu, so all you have to do is look at a restaurant's offerings on the Walt Disney World website to see if it's a vegetarian option you might like. And usually there is, for me. Bonus points to those fine-dining establishments where the meals are not pre-made and they can actually work with you to come up with something you'll love. To me, that's the ultimate Disney dining experience!

Here's the thing... even the "cheap" Walt Disney World resorts are expensive. That being said, they're also decent accommodations where even the least expensive of them are clean, comfortable, and safe. On top of that, all Walt Disney World resort hotels have a few nice perks (like early-entry to the parks, free transportation, and 7-day Lightning Lane pre-booking... plus Deluxe Resorts also get extended park hours some days). This is a far cry from what you used to get with a Disney resort stay (my favorites being having your purchases sent back to your room and the free Magical Express bus from the airport direct to your hotel), but it's better than nothing, and I still prefer to stay on-site than not.

Thanks to my many years of having work in Orlando, I've actually stayed at all but three of the resorts. Granted, this was years ago, so many of the ongoing remodels have been lost on me... but I can comment on what I experienced at the time. I know that most people would separate out the "Villas," "Bungalows," "Towers," and whatever other "Vacation Club" extensions they keep adding to the resorts, but I've not stayed at any of them so I won't (though I have stayed at Saratoga Springs, a DVC resort).

But first, a warning... these resorts are huge and there are many different types of rooms and locations for rooms. So my experience might not be your experience. Plus Disney is remodeling and changing things all the time, which means my experience may not even be relevant any more!

Before I get to my rankings, I should also disclose that there's three properties I haven't stayed at...

• Old Key West Resort (DVC-DELUXE $$$$). It's a Vacation Club property, which doesn't mean I can't stay there... I just never ended up there because it wasn't on the roster I was on. There are Vacation Club members who made this their home property and love it, so it definitely has its fans.
• Riviera Resort (DVC-DELUXE $$$$). This is the newest hotel in the most magical place on earth and I have zero desire to stay there. Looks like a big, boring cracker box of a building that could be a hotel anywhere. I'm sure it's been randomly farted on with Disney IP (intellectual property), but it's just not interesting enough for me to bother. If I was still working in the area I'd probably end up here eventually, and I'm sure the rooms are amazing, it's just not the experience I want when staying at WDW. Maybe I'll go if the restaurants have good word of mouth?
• Shades of Green. This is an "Armed Forces Recreational Center," which means you have to be an active member of the armed services or have retired from service to even step foot on the property. I think there are special exceptions beyond that, but it's things like being discharged yet having earned a Purple Heart or having been a Prisoner of War or having otherwise suffered serious injury or been disabled in combat. There may be other ways, but they're all military-related and off-limits to me.

And now for my rankings...

The Wilderness Lodge in 1997 from a photo I shot while boating on Bay Lake!

1. Wilderness Lodge (DELUXE $$$$$). The first Disney World hotel I stayed at, and is still my favorite. Easily the best theming of any property, I love the design of absolutely everything this hotel has to offer. It's like staying in a grand lodge in the Pacific Northwest... in Florida. I love the rooms with their woodsy aesthetic and spacious accommodations. The only downside is that the restaurants, which used to be my absolute favorite, are now sub-par for vegetarians. And what's worse, you can't really work with the servers or kitchen to accommodate your specific needs like you used to because so many of the dishes have components that are pre-made. I wish the top-tier resorts would go back to being more flexible in their food options, because the "efficiency model" they're running is killing the dining experience for people like me. But, yeah, the primo location, the beautifully appointed public spaces... and even the price, which isn't terrible (when compared to other Deluxe resorts near Magic Kingdom). I could stay here every time I not be disappointed.
2. Animal Kingdom Lodge (DELUXE $$$$$). This would likely overtake my top spot if not for two reasons... 1) You have to get a pricey Savannah View room to make it worth staying here... and 2) It is really far away from everything except Animal Kingdom. That being said, it was also designed by Peter Dominick (who designed the Wilderness Lodge) and is absolutely beautiful. The theming and details are all top-notch. Plus they have the best restaurants of any of the resorts. The only negative is the drumming. Cast members have drumming performances often. There's drums for kids to bang on. It's all drums all the time. I like it for atmosphere, but it's too much and get very, very tiring if you stay here for several days. But hey, if you can afford an amazing Savannah View room, there's nothing quite like seeing animals right out your window.
3. Polynesian Village Resort (DELUXE $$$$$$). To a great many people, this is their favorite resort in all of Disney World and I get it. Excellent theming. Great restaurants (Tonga Toast, baby!). Wonderful rooms. A killer location. The Polynesian has it all. Maybe if it was my first resort it would be my #1, but I just prefer the architecture and aesthetics of the Wilderness Lodge and Animal Kingdom Lodge. Still, this is an amazing resort... assuming you can afford the price tag. My biggest negative, and it pains me to say this because I absolutely love the movie, is that Disney has leaned hard into the Lilo & Stitch theming. I think it was a much more authentic and immersive experience before they did that. Then they slapped Moana on top of that! Still, if you've got the ungodly amount of cash required, I wouldn't miss an opportunity to stay here because it still has a lot of the magic that makes it such a great Walt Disney World resort. In many ways I'd say that this is the most "Disney" of the resorts they have.
4. Caribbean Beach Resort (MODERATE $$$). Back before Skyliner came, this was my #7 pick. But with the addition of a Skyliner stop (and nicely renovated rooms), this has become the best of the "moderate" resorts. Sure the bathrooms are cramped (which makes showering a chore) but otherwise the rooms are clean, fresh, and comfortable. Plus the atmosphere is expansive and laid back in a way that the newer, more expensive Riviera doesn't have at all. The only negative is that Magic Kingdom and Animal Kingdom can't be reached by Skyliner so you have to rely on busses which make many stops to cover the entire resort. We never had to jump to the more plentiful Riviera busses with their one stop (as some people do), but I guess that's an option if you don't mind a walk to get back to your room.
5. Pop Century Resort (VALUE $$). I liked this "value" hotel before it got a Skyliner stop, but now that it has one? It's very good. It's always been my go-to resort to recommend whenever people ask me where they should stay in Walt Disney World that's not crazy-expensive. It's still pricey, of course (all WDW rooms are), but it's got value for the money. Except for the restaurant, which is inexplicably not that great and extremely limited. That aside, the big downside here is that everybody knows how good it is so sometimes booking it can be rough. If that happens to you, I'd invite you to look at the Art of Animation resort that's just across the pond and shares many of the things that make Pop Century such a solid choice.
6. Port Orleans Resorts (MODERATE $$$). There are two sides to the Port Orleans portfolio, and I'd give the edge to French Quarter over Riverside, if forced to choose. This is because French Quarter has Sassagoula Floatworks and Food Factory Scat Cat's Club Café, where you can get authentic beignets! (apparently the beignets have moved?) It's also the smaller of the two and closer to where you want to be. As a "moderate" resort, the rooms are perfectly clean, comfortable, and serviceable... and I believe that I've stayed here more than any other resort over the years. I never minded. It's not too far from Epcot, which is my preferred dining spot, and is near Disney Springs and their restaurants as well. But most of all it's taking inspiration from my favorite American city, New Orleans, and gets some touches just right.
7. Beach Club Resort (DELUXE $$$$$). I've stayed here twice. The first time I stayed here was in a room that was odd in weird ways. I still don't know if it was a failed studio concept room or what, but it was a very different experience from my second stay which felt more "classic hotel." This hotel is an easy walk to Epcot (just 5 minutes!)... but also within reach of Disney Studios (about a 20 minute walk)... which is pretty sweet. And speaking of sweet, this resort is home to Beaches & Cream Soda Shop which is a fantastic place to not only treat yourself to all kinds of ice cream sweets, but also eat (their grilled cheese and tomato soup is great). The aesthetic is probably best described as "Great-Grandma's Bedroom" (but apparently they got refreshed recently, so I don't know what's happening there now). Probably the best thing about this place is the Stormalong Bay water park it shares with the Yacht Club next door. It's an attraction unto itself, and worth looking into if you like that kind of thing.
8. Saratoga Springs Resort & Spa (DVC-DELUXE $$$$). The reason I like this resort so much... what really sells me on the property... is that it's within walking distance of Disney Springs and all its many amazing restaurant options (the last time I stayed here I had a five minute walk to Earl of Sandwich!). It's also fairly quiet, not attracting families with kids like with other resorts because of its lackluster-to-non-existent Disney theming and location away from the parks. If you're looking for Disney "magic" you'd be hard-pressed to find it here. But for the rest of us (and especially those of us at WDW to work?) it's a solid, though expensive, choice with wonderful rooms plus great dining within the resort and outside of it nearby. Which is to say that the reasons I like it is why many people give it a pass, and that's okay.
9. Art of Animation (VALUE $$). I moved this up several notches because, like it's sister property Pop Century, it now has a Skyliner stop. When I stayed here it was fairly new, and was erected to take the place of the other half of Pop Century that was never finished and ultimately abandoned. The big feature of this hotel is that it has large "family suite" accommodations which can sleep six people. Myself and a colleague ended up splitting one of these suites and I gotta say it's pretty nice. There's a separate bedroom with its own bathroom, so parents have a way to escape the kids for a minute. If you're a larger family, this could be your best bet. Another claim to fame? It's apparently got the largest pool of any Disney resort property, if you're into that kind of thing. The down-side is that you get one restaurant and I wasn't at all impressed. I'd advise you to go across the lake, but the offering at Pop Century isn't much better.
10. Swan & Dolphin (DELUXE $$$$). I've only stayed at the Dolphin half, but I'm guessing it's pretty similar to the Swan half? I dunno. These properties are infamous for being non-Disney properties on the Disney property. I think Disney needed cash, so they took money from Marriott which allowed them a spot to build hotels which have the same benefits of a Disney Deluxe Hotel but at a lesser cost. And you do get serious good value for the money at these properties (better room for less!). Though it's not perfect. We went mini-golfing at Fantasia Gardens and took the Swan's bus back to Magic Kingdom. Except we had a very long wait before the bus arrived. We would have been better off walking to Disney Studios and taking their bus. This is a serious problem. I'm guessing the total time spent is no less than staying at an off-site hotel. So... more bang for your buck over similarly-priced Disney resorts. But ultimately lesser in important ways too.
11. Contemporary Resort (DELUXE $$$$$). Back in the day, this used to be a hotel that I was thrilled to be dropped in. It was smart, elevated, and beautiful. Plus it had a really good location when it comes to getting to the Magic Kingdom. But then... it started going downhill. The atrium keeps getting all kinds of crap shoved into it, needlessly distracting from the cool monorail run and gorgeous Mary Blair mural. This includes one of the worst restaurants in WDW, Chef Mickey's, which turned me off of eating buffets (except for Boma at Animal Kingdom Lodge, of course). It's trash despite costing over $50 for dinner and breakfast! Some of the rooms got an Incredibles makeover, which sounds seriously cool (seriously, the vibe of The Incredibles is a perfect match for this hotel), though I hear Disney did it on the cheap so it's not as good as it could have been. Regardless, some of the public areas are still pretty cool despite it all, and it's a classic resort that helped to define what it means to stay with Disney, so I'm not opposed to staying there. I just wish Disney would give it the love it deserves and make it be worth the cost to stay.
12. Coronado Springs Resort (MODERATE $$$). This is not a brilliantly Disney-themed property with a fabulous location... but I do like staying here because it was so perfect for my work needs. It's got nice rooms. It's quite. It's got a great size desk. Plus it's now got Toledo, a tapas restaurant that I would never tire of eating at. And if I ever do get tired of it, Epcot is right next door and a short bus ride to all their great restaurants. There were many questionable choices made when they built this property, but for the money it's a good choice to be on-site and get the dwindling benefits that a Disney hotel gets you. Plus they opened up the "Gran Destino Tower" (home of Toledo) which looks pretty great, especially for a "moderate" resort, so if this appeals to you, you might want to check into it.
13. Grand Floridian Resort & Spa (DELUXE $$$$$$$). This is THE premiere resort at Walt Disney World, and tops many people's lists at WDW for its luxury and opulence. And the rooms are nice, I guess... albeit a bit bland and not themed or utilized well. But luxurious? Not even. It's all done on the cheap. It's fake, and designed badly. To me it has the stylings of a brothel and the restaurants are overpriced and aren't great for vegetarians with options I didn't care for. It's just a big, faux-fancy, wildly-expensive hotel that happens to be close to Magic Kingdom, and I just don't get the love for it. The only thing I thought it did well was the activities, but are they worth the cost? No. If I was the one footing the bill for the one time I stayed there, I would have been pissed. I hear it's been updated recently... so maybe it's better now? Other than visiting during the holidays to get me some gingerbread, I rarely end up here even to visit.
14. Boardwalk Inn (and Conference Center) (DELUXE $$$$$). The whole concept of an old-timey hotel on a boardwalk is a great start. Add to that the easy walkability to both Epcot and Disney Hollywood Studios, and it's tough to beat a stay at the Boardwalk. Except... the resort feels way too expensive for what you get. Even the rooms overlooking the parking lot are pricey. But if you want a view of the boardwalk itself? Hope you got some serious cash on hand. Another ding to the property are the pools, which seem so weak compared to what you get across the lake at Beach Club (also a DELUXE). Overall this isn't a bad resort at all. I'd stay here in a heartbeat. But not at the money they're charging.
15. Yacht Club Resort (DELUXE $$$$$). Conceptually, this resort should place higher than the Boardwalk Inn above. But there's one thing that makes that impossible for me. It's frickin' boring. I'd far rather stay at the Beach Club next door because it feels more fun. Which is a shame, because it's definitely a pretty property. It's just that I expect something more exciting when staying with Disney. On the plus side, you do get access to the Stormalong Bay water park shared with the Beach Club.
16. All Star Music Resort (VALUE $). Full disclosure... I haven't actually stayed here. But I did crash here with a colleague when I didn't feel like finding my way back to the off-site Hilton after having too much to drink at the Victoria Falls Lounge (in the Animal Kingdom Lodge). That counts, doesn't it? The hotel is just so... basic... but you do get whatever perks are left when staying at a Walt Disney World resort, so that's about the best thing I can say about it. If you're on a tight budget but want Disney accommodations, this is an option for you.
17. All Star Movies Resort (VALUE $). This would be my dead-last choice because it's just so far removed from everything and it's older... but at least it was fairly quiet. If you are just looking for a basic, relatively cheap, no-frills hotel within the Disney Bubble, this will serve you well if your expectations are kept in check. I only stayed here once for one day and it was fine.
18. All Star Sports Resort (VALUE $). I'm not into sports and when I stayed here it was incredibly noisy. I needed to be able to work, and that was made far more difficult with a bunch of screaming kids running around (and not just little kids, a lot of older kids as well). I did my level best to not stay here because once was enough. Maybe if you're lucky enough to get a quiet stay it's good?

Finishing up with my entries on my recent(?) trip to Walt Disney World... I thought I'd end my near THREE WEEKS(!) of Disney-related posts by talking about the future.

As summed up in my entry about the announcements of D23, Magic Kingdom at Walt Disney World is getting its own version of Cars Land. I had thought that it was being put BEHIND Frontierland...

But nope. It's going INSIDE Frontierland, and they're paving over the Rivers of America to get it there...

Now, on its surface, this doesn't seem like the worst idea... for Walt Disney World (the same thing cannot be said for the original at Disneyland, which is sacred). The rafts to Tom Sawyer Island (not to mention the island itself) is hardly popular any more. And the Liberty Square Riverboat barely has people on it most times. So why not pave it over and put in attractions which people will actually want to experience?

When I was in Magic Kingdom on my trip, I didn't want to visit Tom Sawyer Island, but I did want to say good bye to what the park would be losing. So every time I walked around the "river" I was sure to take a good look...

And then I had pause.

It's not that the attractions on the river and on the island are not very popular and it would be good to have something people will actually want to visit... it's the aesthetic of what the river and island provide for the area around them.

Frontierland and Liberty Square have their entire vibe defined by their location being along that lazy river. It's scenic. It's relaxing. And walking along the body of water makes it feel a bit cooler on a sweltering Summer day. Removing it is going to have a serious affect on visiting these areas. An argument could be made that a river is a bit out of place in Frontierland given the dusty frontier town they're striving to replicate, but that's not the point. It's not what it's supposed to be, it's what it is now.

I think that the area will suffer once the river is gone.

Though I'd have a tough time arguing with Disney management to keep investing the money needed to maintain and improve the river and island when they're clearly one of the most unpopular areas in the park.

And then we need to jump over to Disney Hollywood Studios, where Monstropolis (the city from Monsters, Inc.) will be located. Rumor has it that they will be paving over Muppets Courtyard for that (and probably blowing into the employee parking lot behind it a bit)...

Map and Satellite Image © Google

Now if Muppets Courtyard has to be leveled for anything, I'd rather it be paved over to join Star Wars Land (on the left) with the Star Wars Star Tours ride (on the right), and be used to add another Original Trilogy attraction...

Map and Satellite Image © Google

That would complete Star Wars Land and also give us a bit more Original Trilogy to experience which, let's be honest, is what everybody would rather have anyway. Then Monstropolis could be put in its entirety in the employee parking lot like so...

Map and Satellite Image © Google

Now, this would necessitate some serious Imagineering because foot traffic would have to go over (or under!) the Cypress Drive access road, but doing that would further separate Monstropolis from the rest of the park, so I choose to think of it as a good thing. And of course they'd have to find a spot for employees to park, but that's the easiest of all problems to solve because they could be shuttled from the lot to the park fairly easily. And the payoff? Well, just look at how big Monstropolis would be able to be! You could really do it justice in an area like that (plus have room for expansion).

And lastly we need to jump over to Animal Kingdom, where Tropical America Land will go. I think the biggest problem with this entire concept is that I can't see how any of it relates to animals. It's built around Indiana Jones Adventure and a Casa Madrigal boat ride? WTF? There's also the matter of dinosaurs being incredibly popular with kids and DinoLand USA being fairly well done (and dinosaurs being, you know, animals)... which makes it a little tough to think about it being ripped out. But, again, I'm guessing they wouldn't be paving it over if it were popular enough to keep. And if DINOSAUR wasn't such a badly nerfed version of the original Countdown to Extinction.

And there it is. The future. Maybe. Because Disney could just be announcing all this to counter what's happening over at Universal Studios' "Epic Universe." They could cancel any of it or all of it at any time.

Which would be pretty bad, because they certainly needs to do something to stay relevant in the Florida theme park business.

Today I had to run out for a quick errand. When I got back, Jake was running up to me crying like I had been gone fifteen days instead of fifteen minutes. So I started petting him like I always do when I come home from work. Except any time I went to leave, he'd start crying again. So I ended up hanging with Jake for more time than I was actually gone.

Jenny, on the other hand, is crying more often because she doesn't like what she's being fed for her meals. Even if it's something she's yummed up many, many times before... all of a sudden it's unacceptable and so she comes into the kitchen crying at me to complain. I used to rush to find something else, but the more I did that the more often she complained. So I started ignoring her, and she'd go eat the stuff she didn't want two seconds prior. But this week when I tried that, she was not having it. She followed me out of the kitchen and hounded me until I was all "ALRIGHT! ALRIGHT! I'LL GET YOU SOMETHING ELSE!"

Which is exactly what she wanted, and she got her way. Again.

My girl is getting so cranky as she gets older. Just look at this face she made when her peace was interrupted by Jake who hopped on the bed, flopped over, then passed out...

She gave me this look for a while. And look at the judgey look she gave me when I dared to cough while she was sleeping. She woke up, twisted herself around, then glared at me...

Poor Jenny. She really is the sweetest cat you'll ever find. She just enjoys letting you know when she's annoyed.

Facebook is the craziest fucking platform. They are constantly slapping down people for stupid reason, giving them time-outs for even stupider reason, and outright banning them for the stupidest reasons you've heard... all while not doing a fucking thing to protect people who are actually being attacked or stopping advertisers who are scammers.

One of the posts I made years ago was flagged as "False Information"...

And I was like... huh. I wonder what it was that I shared? I click through and they don't tell me yet, I'm just told that independent fact checkers have flagged the post...

I click through on that and find out that it's a fucking joke as to why cats purr...

Jesus. Meanwhile politicians are posting some shit that's so fucking outrageous that it defies any kind of logic, but since Facebook isn't flagging that, their followers are thinking "Well, it must be 100% true or else Facebook would be flagging it like they do that misinformation about why cats purr!" But of course it's just because Facebook doesn't give a single fuck about truth... it's all about money. Advertisers lie? Who cares, they are paying Facebook for their ads! Politicians lie? Who cares, their followers are driving engagement which means more eyeballs on ads which means more money! It's only the random people who have almost zero monetary value to Facebook that get blocked or banned because it's not affecting the money that's rolling in.

I say this as Jake is purring next to me on the couch.

So... what has been going on in my life while Blogography has been in Walt Disney World for the past 18 days? Glad you asked... because an all new Bullet Sunday starts... now...

   
• EIGHTEEN DAYS?! Yeah, with the exception of that Caturday where I put Mickey Mouse ears on my cats and that final Future Backwards entry, all of those posts were (mostly) written on the flight back home from Orlando. But they were five very, very long posts that nobody would want to read. So I chopped them up into shorter posts that nobody would want to read. You're welcome!

   
• AI Apocalypse! WAAAAAAHHH! HA HA HA! Yeah, Eddy Burback is killing it on AI. Must watch video, because it's not just funny but has some great info on the current state of the tech...

I have no objection to AI, in theory, but all too often it's based on outright theft. And if people aren't being compensated for their hard work being scraped to make (bad) AI happen, then AI shouldn't happen!

   
• Fuzzy Feelings! Congratulations to Apple on winning Best Primetime Commercial from the Creative Arts Emmys. This is a spectacular spot that is beautifully shot and executed...

If all ads were this good, I'd actually want to watch ads. Here's a quick behind-the-scenes...

So much of the ads we're inundated with are creatively bankrupt. And it's not about money because I've seen many, many great ads which have been done on the cheap. Many thanks to companies like Apple for continuing to understand that people don't want their TV programs interrupted by shit.

   
• Sacrifice. This is what righteous anger looks like (here's a link in case TikTok is being a dick)...

But the people who most need to see this... the people who profess to stand with our military... will never even bother. It's easier to build the narrative you want when truth doesn't factor into the equation.

   
• After the Fall! I'm sad that The Fall Guy movie remake wasn't a huge success, because it's such a fun movie. Would love to get a sequel that probably won't happen. If you want to see it, an extended cut of the film is currently streaming on Peacock TV.

Universal Pictures should make it just to benefit humanity.

   
• Ace! How can you not adore Serena Williams? I love how she was asked how she could not have ever drank a "Honey Deuce" in all the years she’s been at the Open and she’s like “I was playing.” If there’s a GOAT in tennis (maybe even in all sports) she is absolutely it...

I love it when god-like beings are revealed to be just like the rest of us!

   
• small. If you've been following my blog for a while, you know I'm a bit obsessed with tiny homes and small space living. Heck, I even designed a tiny home once! I don't know that I would ever actually choose to live in one unless it was my only option, but I have gotten so many great ideas from watching videos like this absolutely brilliant one right here...

That is one amazing apartment. I could absolutely live in something this beautiful and thoughtful. And speaking of small, check this out...

44 houses in the space originally meant for 9. That's incredible. And good for everybody involved.

   
• YES ITS YOU HI! This cool video is worth your valuable time to watch to the end. Brought a smile to my face after an awful day when I first saw it...

I absolutely love stories like this.

   
And now back to our regularly-scheduled non-Disney content. Probably.

If I were to have a regret over my trip to Walt Disney World, it would be that I didn't go to the Polynesian Village Resort for Tonga Toast, and I didn't get any Spicy Hummus Fries from Spice Road Table in Epcot's Morocco Pavilion.

Everything else I wanted to do (namely ride all the attractions which came out after my list visit and eat at some of my favorite places) I did. I try not to have regrets in life, but... Enter Copycat Recipes.
   

Tonga Toast

This amazing breakfast treat hails from the two breakfast restaurants at Polynesian Village Resort is pretty simple. Take a really thick slice of sourdough bread, cut a pocket in one side, shove banana slices in it, then dredge in a egg/milk/vanilla wash, deep fat fry, then coat in a cinnamon-sugar mix.

It's incredible.

I looked at three separate copycat recipes and came up with my own vegan version which uses almond milk for regular milk and egg substitute for eggs. No, it's not going to be an exact flavor match, but the milk/egg thing isn't a big part of the flavor profile, so it's perfectly fine. But the bigger difference in my recipe? I am not using a massive slice of bread because I would have to drag out my deep fat fryer to cook it. Instead I will use "regular-thick" bread and put the bananas and sugar on top because that will only require an inch of oil in a small skillet.

The result was darn tasty...

Now, I want to be very clear. I didn't cheat this. I didn't blast a skillet with cooking spray and fry it up like you'd normally make French Toast. I did indeed use enough oil to cover the toast, then submerged it so it was deep fat fried. Because it's the slow deep fat frying that gives it a different, crispy texture which is superior to regular French Toast. So good.

I was going to bake the bananas a bit to simulate the cooking that bananas get being inside the bread in real Tonga Toast, but ultimate passed on that because it occurred to me that the bananas in real Tonga Toast have so much bread around them that they don't get very cooked. Just warned a bit.

Maybe next time I'll bake a loaf of sourdough, pull out the deep fat fryer, and do this up right. But probably not, because what I ended up with had all the taste that I wanted out of real Tonga Toast.
   

Spicy Hummus Fries

While more like "mini falafel loaves" than "hummus fries," these fantastic staples of the Morocco Pavilion finally got a permanent home at Spice Road Table restaurant (after being a dish at the Epcot Food & Wine Festival). The first time I tried them in 2017, I ate double-orders for lunch and dinner most days I was there. They're heavenly. I love falafel, so it's not a shock that I love these vegan treats. What makes them different than falafel is the addition of spicy spices and the vegan chipotle mayo sauce, which takes them to the next level.

I only found one copycat recipe. And while the results from their recipe are pretty close, the sauce is different, but not bad at all. Overall, I really liked this recipe, and will absolutely be making them again...

Kinda like a falafel pita sandwich without the pita, I guess?

And now I really need to set aside Walt Disney World and get back to my Real Life. If that's even possible.

Time to say good bye to Summer.

My air conditioning hasn't come on since I've gotten back from vacation. My outdoor plants are starting to keel over, turn brown, and die. And the mornings and evenings are noticeably cool now. Fall is totally going to be here any minute now (well, okay, it'll officially be here in three days), so I've been doing what I can to clean up the yard, get my wood shop torn down so I have a garage, and do all the other things that one does while the weather is still accommodating to it.

Like clean out my flower beds.

There's this tree-thing that grows back every year. I chop it down, it grows back almost immediately. I thought that having my flower beds completely gutted last year would finally kill it, but NOPE!

This year I actually just let it be. I never had time to replant the very front of my house, and it was green and tall and helped fill up space. But now that everything needs to be cleaned out, I chopped it down...

I posted about it on Facebook, and somebody told me... "Yeah, that's a Tree of Heaven, and they're almost impossible to get rid of." And so I had to research that. "Tree of Heaven" (AKA Ailanthus Altissima) is something that totally IS tough to get rid of because the root system is extensive and can survive almost anything. Regular poisons won't work (there goes my plan to drill into the cut edges and put herbicide on it), and may actually encourage it to spread further because it will try to escape the poison.

And so... next year I will probably hire a company who knows what to do to try and get rid of it for good.

I hope their solution isn't to light my yard and home on fire.

James Earl Jones died a week ago and I'm having a hard time processing it.

As anybody who has read this blog for a while knows, Field of Dreams is my favorite movie of all time. I love everything about it. The sheer weirdness of it appeals to me, of course, but it's the way the ground it in reality which has made me such a huge fan. But there's also the actors. It's so flawlessly cast and performed. You've got Kevin Costner and Amy Madigan who embodied their roles as few actors could, reaching deep to create an atmosphere of normalcy in a situation that's far from normal. Burt Lancaster pulling out all the stops to sell his character in a way that he absolutely had to for the movie to work.

And then there's James Earl Jones...

Spoilers ahead if you're one of those unfortunate people who has never seen Field of Dreams...

In so many ways, his character is the real star of this movie. Until Terry comes along, there's no obstacle to what was happening. Just some esoteric talk about running out of money and losing the farm. But once Ray gets a vision compelling him to seek out famous recluse author Terence Mann, the movie is no longer about "Crazy Ray Kinsella" plowing under his farm... it's being smacked in the face with reality. Terence confirms that Ray actually might be crazy, and the story of the film comes to a halt (in one of the most hilarious ways possible).

Until it doesn't.

Then it's Terence Mann show, as he becomes the avatar for the audience in reacting to what's happening and helping Ray understand what it all means.

And the you get to that scene where Ray and Terence have picked up Archie Graham and then it's nighttime and Ray is explaining his complicated relationship with his father and Terence drops the bomb over what the entire movie is about.

"It's your pennance."
"I know."

The movie is packed with beautiful, perfect moments, and James Earl Jones is the best part of most of them. And of course he has that amazing, flawless monologue about baseball at end end...

Can your mind possibly even fathom anybody else delivering that speech?

Or being the voice of Darth Vader in Star Wars?

Or being the coice of Mufasa in The Lion King?

Or being King Jaffe Joffer in Coming to America?

Or being Mr. Mertle in The Sandlot?

Or being any character big or small that James Earl Jones touched?

One of my favorite things he did was a guest spot on Big Bang Theory where he played himself. Or rather an exaggerated version of himself...

And there's a wonderful behind-the-scenes moment that makes it even better...

But it was all wonderful when it comes to James Earl Jones.

He will be missed in a way I have a hard time finding the words to express. But it's hard to be sad when so much of him has been left in his work. I'm incredibly grateful for all of it. Especially when you consider that it almost all never happened...

Of course the tributes from all kinds of people came pouring in after his passing. But there's one that hit me like no other. And got me to thinking of how James Earl Jones thought that when Darth Vader says No, I am your father! that he was lying...

Because this is the one that did me in...

Rest In Peace, sir. You touched the world in ways that few people could ever hope to achieve.

Long before the candle parties, makeup parties, sex toy parties, and home decor parties, were Tupperware parties. I remember them very well. Every other month or so one of the moms on the block would host a party where the neighborhood would gather to see all the latest wares from a goliath plastic food container company so they could order stuff to make their lives easier (and keep their foods fresher).

Personally I hated Tupperware because the containers would easily warp and stain... and the soft plastic would scratch with little effort, always making me wonder how much plastic was ending up in our food. My mom still had a bunch of the stuff when I cleaned out here cupboards... all of it warped, stained, and scratched.

With the exception of this thing, which I kept and still use from time to time...

Guaranteed delicious microplastics in every bite!

Today it was announced that Tupperware is bankrupt.

Which isn't too shocking. Who has time for food storage parties when you can just order cheap crap from Amazon and get on with your life? Or, if you're me, replace as much kitchen stuff as possible with glass and metal (well, except for stuff that sits out on the counter because I have cats).

Still... I do have some fond Tupperware memories too. It would be tough growing up in 1970's rural America and not have fond memories.

There were the Tupperware popcicle molds which you could fill with Kool-Aid (or Jell-O or Jell-O Pudding, if you were bougie). There was the Tupperware cereal keeper containers which made it so that your Fruit Loops didn't go stale as fast. There was that famous Tupperware cake taker that got pulled out when grandma was taking a cake somewhere and you got excited for a slice.

But then there was everything else, which usually meant you were getting gross leftovers instead of new deliciousness. That's the darker side of my childhood that most people don't want to discuss. Though, as an adult who has to actually pay for my own food, I'm thrilled to have modern food storage technology!

I'd just prefer that my food not be stored in plastic and cost a fortune, so I guess childhood memories are all the Tupperware I need.

It's Friday again, which would usually have me excited about having time off for the weekend. Except Summer ends on Sunday, so I've got a rapidly dwindling amount of time to get my home and yard ready for winter. My garage wood shop has been dismantled. My HVAC inspection has been made. I've replaced my air filter. I'm down to the home stretch.

Which largely involves taking out my Fall/Winter clothes, bedding, and such... then storing away my Spring/Summer stuff.

Which is to say that there's going to be a lot of washing and packing.

How can I look forward to that?

The luxurious Summer heat has started to dissipate, which means that my cats are less likely to want to spend time outside in the catio.

Which means they're hanging around the house being all bored. And it goes something like this...

Me: "JAKE! HEY JAKE! YO, JAKE! WHAT'S HAPPENING JAKE?!?"

Jake:

Yeah, Spring can't come soon enough for them.

It's the first day of Fall, but I'm not out enjoying it... because an all new Bullet Sunday starts... now...

   
• Tanev! As a diehard Blackhawks fan, it took a while before I was sold on my local team, The Seattle Kraken. But they're just such a fun team. They're fun to watch play. And the team leader when it comes to Big Fun is Brandon Tenev, whom is an absolute legend because of his annual team photo. And this year he did not disappoint...

Legend. Of course they unleashed a behind-the-scenes...

There's a reason all my Kraken jerseys are lucky #13. And there he is.

   
• Birbs! Toss those pufflings off that cliff!

Nice to see humans helping with a problem they've caused.

   
• Kids Need a Family! Just want to say to the whole "KIDS NEED A MOM AND A DAD!" crowd... where were the moms and dads stepping up to give these kids a home after they've been shuffled around for FOUR YEARS? I'll tell you where... climbing on Facebook to condemn gay parents while doing fuck all about anything. Well, thanks to these two gentlemen, these siblings now have a home. Together. Where they are loved and cared for...

Anything other than your full-throated support of this family doesn't mean shit, and if you're not wishing them the best of luck but instead hoping they fail, well then this isn't about the children is it? Just your shitty bigotry.

   
• SeaTac Busted! I may die of un-shock as Seattle-Tacoma International Airport comes in 5th place in the "Least satisfying North American mega-airports" poll. To me, that's four places too high. I've flown in and out of a ridiculous number of airports, and Seattle is not just my most-hated in the USA, but is way up there world-wide. So many stupid fucking decisions made, and more being made every year. I detest Sea-Tac, and am glad to see that I'm not alone in that. I dearly wish that the Port of Seattle would stop making so many awful decsions and get to making SeaTac something that Washingtonians can be proud of. Because I'm embarrassed when people visiting our State have our main airport as their first impression.

   
• It's Not Cheating! Way back when the Phil Ivey "cheating" scandal came out, I read the stories and didn't get it. HE. DIDN'T. CHEAT. He played the game that casinos presented to him (and Cheung Yin "Kelly" Sun), but found a way to do it better than other people could. Now I see this fascinating video and am mad about it all over again...

Any time casinos lose money, they blame "cheating." Even when it wasn't.

   
• Will & Harper! Thanks to Netflix for continuing to move the needle of acceptance (even if they did just cancel Deadboy Detectives so they could give a bajillion dollars to Zack Snyder to shit out his crappy Rebel Moon travesties)...

I have a friend who means the world to me that shouldn't have to live in fear for being who she is, and every little bit helps dismantle the toxic hellscape she has to endure is a good thing.

   
And thus starts my Fall.

Marvel Studios used to make a good film FIRST and have the bigger story arc of the MCU be a nice-add-on. That's why their movies have always been stellar. But lately they seem to be chasing another big Avengers Infinity War/End Game arc first, putting characters and story second, and it's ruining everything. Make the movie you're making now the best it can be. Then drop a few things that aren't distracting, but pushing what you're building up to. It's formula, but it works.

Today the teaser trailer was released for their second big movie of 2025 (after Captain America: New World Order), and it looks very promising...

And the movie poster is glorious...

Now, readers of Marvel comic books have a lot to take in here. The concept of the MCU version of Thunderbolts is very different from what we've seen in the source material. But... there's things in the trailer which are familiar too. The biggest of which is the debut of Sentry, likely the most powerful character in the entire Marvel Universe. How they decided to put such a character in Thunderbolts I have no idea. But it's very cool. They could have saved it for an Avengers film (heaven only knows the guy is powerful enough to take on the entire team!), but they must have had a good idea for Thunderbolts and decided to put the movie first and go that route.

Bravo.

I really, really hope that Marvel Studios is back to their former ideals and not coasting with movies that have no purpose for the characters, but exist solely to push a bigger narrative (Like Ant Man: Quantumania which, ironically, is now completely irrelevant since Kang has exited the MCU and may never be mentioned again despite the cliffhanger post-credits ending).

One can hope.

A couple weeks ago I was looking for something on this blog and ran across an entry I wrote in 2010(!). Apparently I didn't have a lot to talk about fourteen years ago, because I wrote about some of my current favorite foods, including... Pink Lady Apples, Frosted Flakes, Craisins, Pretzel Thins, and CHEESE TOASTWICHES from Schwan's! These cheese sandwiches were cooked in your toaster and were darn tasty. I'm not kidding when I say that I'd average one package a day. Running late and need something quick for breakfast? Toastwiches. Need an easy lunch? Toastwiches. Too tired to cook dinner? Toastwiches. Midnight snack? Toastwiches.

My brain immediately went "Oh yeah! I wonder whatever happened to Schwan's?"

There was a time I loved that the Schwan's would pull up to my work once a week and offer quality frozen vegetarian options without my having to go to the store. But then they started raising their prices to an alarming degree and adding bullshit extra charges. Like a FUEL CHARGE?!? Dude, delivery is your entire deal, why the fuck are you adding a FUEL CHARGE instead of building into the cost of your products? Oh, I know, you want to try and camouflage the real cost of your stuff. Well, no thanks.

But I did end up looking up Schwan's because I was curious how much a box of Toastwiches was going for.

Turns out that Schwan's was re-branded Yelloh! in 2022. And they no longer sell Cheese Toastwiches, something I posted to Facebook after I found out...

And today it was announced that Yelloh! is shutting down operations.

When I think of how Schwan's went to the massive expense to re-brand the business and all those delivery trucks only two years ago, I can't help but wonder if the cash required ended up hastening their demise.

It's a real shame that these legacy companies that were once something I once loved are slowly disappearing. But, when I think to how my love for them isn't current and rooted in the past, I get it.

I'd pour out a Cheese Toastwich in Schwan's honor... but, well...

When I heard they were remaking Matlock, I groaned inwardly.

Why? Just... why?

Is it really that impossible to come up with a unique idea? And... whoa... they're gender-swapping it, so I guess that's their way of making it a "unique idea." Groundbreaking.

I was going to take a hard pass on the show if not for two things...

1. I actually really do like the original show. I'd watch it with my mom, because there was never a murder-mystery show she didn't like, and Matlock was particularly smart and well-acted. I was never a huge fan of Andy Griffith, but boy oh boy did he have a bead on his character. If there's even a chance the new show has half the smarts of the original, it might be worth a look.
2. The reboot stars... KATHY BATES?!? I'm a huge fan, and I knew if she was involved it must be something special.

And so I tuned in.

And really liked it!

Mostly because this is not at all a reboot. It's very much its own thing. And though they do allude to it in the trailer, you are not prepared for exactly how it's different. A great twist that I absolutely won't be spoiling here...

I will be very interested in seeing if they can keep the momentum of the first episode going. Because if they can? This could end up being a sleeper hit that catches a lot of people by surprise.

I'm a sucker for a really good action flick.

I've always been a fan of them, because there's nothing quite so entertaining as turning off your mind and enjoying some mindless violence. All those Schwarzenegger flicks were certified gold to me. And yet... there's something to be said when your violence comes with something extra. Humor has long been a favorite. That started with Jackie Chan movies. Intricate and interesting fight scenes are always a plus. That also started with Jackie Chan. From there I discovered Michelle Yeoh, Jet Li, Chow Yun-Fat, and a slew of other amazing Asian action stars. I thought less of the American action films of my youth, which were most times so very, very bad. And not in a so-bad-they're-good way. But there were bright spots along the way. I really like Jason Statham's films (his latest, The Beekeeper, is excellent). And of course there's James Bond. The character has some ups and downs, but he's got some amazing action beats.

But then it all went to the next level with the John Wick franchise.

What Keanu Reeves and Chad Stahelski did with those films is sublime.

Smart, stylish, and beautifully shot, they had a rich mythology which made the films so much more than just great action flicks. Plus they were a lot of fun. Which is why it all came to an end(?) with John Wick 4.

Except now it's not ended because we're getting a spin-off in the best way possible... with the John Wick characters plus Ana de Armas?!? Sign me up!

I'm especially happy to see Lance Reddick's Charon one more time in Ballerina. I think this may be his last work before he died?

The trailer looks great. And I really hope that it is successful enough that they decide to give us John Wick 5.

Last night I was constantly checking the news for word on what Hurricane Helene is up to. I have more than a few friends in her path, and seeing it escalate to a Category 4 storm was more than a little worrisome. Heavy rains, flash flooding, surges, strong winds, and evacuation orders are bad enough. But hearing how a rural sheriff's office is telling people to “Please write your name, birthday, and important information on your arm or leg in a PERMANENT MARKER so that you can be identified and family notified” is mortifying.

I put my laptop away and went to bed after the hurricane made landfall because the stress of it all was hitting hard. And I'm not even there. I can't imagine what it's like for people in the path of the storm. All I could do was hope that people were taking the evacuation orders seriously and staying safe.

And then I woke up this morning and grabbed my phone first thing to see what is happening...

"Hurricane Helene was a dangerous Category 4 storm when it made landfall over Florida's Big Bend area late Thursday night but weakened rapidly as it raced inland early Friday and was downgraded to a tropical storm in mere hours, the National Hurricane Center said. Still, Helene was bringing a "life-threatening" storm surge, strong winds and heavy rain, the center said."

So... good news is that the hurricane is now a tropical storm.

Bad news is that this tropical storm is still going to be dangerous, and 4 million people are without power as I type this.

This is more than likely our lives from here on out. Drastic increases in ocean temperatures causing more and more dangerous weather. I remember when the USA was getting maybe one hurricane making landfall each year. Then it was two. In the Year of Our Lord 2024, we've had four. And hurricane season isn't even over yet.

Climate change is undeniable at this point. There's no denying it because you can see it with your own eyes. People can debate the cause (I, for one, have read the science and believe that we have met the enemy and he is us) but sticking our heads in the sand pretending it doesn't exist is futile. Our climate is changing, and we have to do something to live with that. Spend the money to better our infrastructure for evacuations and build shelters for when that's not possible. Provide more funding to the National Weather Service and the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration so we can learn more about the dangerous weather that is regularly forming off our Southern Coast and hopefully be able to better predict where storms will arrive so we can save lives.

In other words, we need to do is the opposite of what Project 2025 is mandating. That would be the blueprint for radically restructuring the government with policies to be enacted immediately upon a Trump victory in the presidential election. Among those policies are plans to utterly gut NOAA and NWS by having them no longer be independent to report their findings and do their research, but instead be under the direct control of the executive branch. Which is to say that the president can tell these vital, life-saving agencies what they can do and what they can say. If they'll even get to operate in the first place. Project 2025 wants the National Weather Service to charge for their forecasts or abandon weather forecasting entirely. But since they are reported to already be working with commercial organizations, who knows what that even means. Are they saying that if you want to know if your house is in the path of a hurricane, you have to pay $5 to find out? Isn't this kind of shit why we pay taxes?

Trump himself has disavowed Project 2025 because it's unpopular with just about everybody, but even a cursory look at the facts shows that he's been living it and advocating for it. And most of the people working on it are from his administration or are associated with him in some way. Which is to say that educating yourself on Project 2025 and voting accordingly would be a smart move, because the damage this plan would do is unfathomable.

As are most things to do with politics in this country.

Jenny is skittish. She is always on high alert... even when it comes to me.

And who can blame her? I'm a giant by comparison! So when she's sitting somewhere, I will walk as slow as I can or take a route where I'm not so close that I spook her. I'd rather let her come to me when she wants attention than scare her. Then she can pretend to be disinterested, but I know better...

Meanwhile in Jake news...

I have never trimmed my cats' claws. Both of them maintain their own claws, they're not growing back into their toe pads, and they don't scratch where they're not supposed to. Jake is very serious about keeping his claws groomed, but makes clicky noises when he walks on the hardwood floors.

Except this week when he's gone totally silent somehow. Very disturbing to have him be able to sneak up on me when I can usually hear him coming!

One minute he's not there. Then the next thing I know he's popped up wanting to be petted...

Though there are certainly worse surprises to be had.

I'm too tired to write but not too tired to blog... because an all new Bullet Sunday starts... now...

   
• Smith! When people think of the late, great Dame Maggie Smith, I'm betting it's either her roles in Downton Abbey and Harry Potter that come to mind. But I didn't like anything to do with Harry Potter and wasn't a fan of Downton Abbey. For me, it's the many, many smaller roles I love her for. She had a small role in The First Wives Club that was wonderfully savage. Her smallest look and every motion was flawless...

Her talent was endless... Sister Act, The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel, California Suite, the original (and superior) Death on the Nile. The list goes on and on. This interview is worth your valuable time to watch...

An absolute gem. You will be sorely missed.

   
• Dame Sir Dame? I would be badly remiss if I didn't post this amazing skit of Sir Ian McKellen as Dame Maggie Smith on SNL from years ago...

Will never not be hilarious.

   
• Ashton! When it comes to character actors, John Ashton is one for the books. He popped up in unexpected places all the time. But it was the role of John Taggart in the Beverly Hills Cop films that cemented him in pop culture history...

Another loss for Hollywood. Rest in Peace, sir.

   
• NEWS: Walmart self-checkout mistake destroys Olympic athlete's career. Not only are stores like Walmart asking you to work for them by scanning your own groceries... they seek to imprison you if you scan them wrong or their machines fails to read the scan. Because, you know, WE'RE ALL FUCKING EXPERTS WHEN IT COMES TO BEING A GROCERY CHECKER... BEING FORCED TO DO A JOB WE WERE NEVER TRAINED FOR! — I hope she sues them for a billion dollars and wins. This kind of shit drives me insane.

   
• Mickey's Balls! Franklin Farms makes some really good vegan products, and a really good one is their "Black Bean & Plantain Balls." When I saw them in the grocery store this last week, I was surprised to see that they are now being promoted by Mickey Mouse...

Which just goes to show that Disney will slap their intellectual property on anything. Because money, I guess. I do question the benefit that Franklin Farms is going to get by this branding partnership. Do they think that kids are going to see Mickey in the refrigerator case and scream "MOM! DAD! I WANT MICKEY'S BALLS!" or something? I don't get it. But whatever. Mickey's balls are pretty tasty when served over rice...

Of course, I'm a sucker for Cuban-style meals, so my opinion is far from biased.

   
• Asano! Oh man. There's so many exceptional international actors that I love, and it always makes my heart grind that most Americans will never know their work. I'm so happy that Tadanobu Asano is getting recognized for his craft and that Americans could see him at work in Shōgun! Which he talks about in this terrific interview...

Congratulations on the Hollywood Reporter Japan’s Trailblazer Award, sir! I've been a fan for quite a while!

   
• Hold Me Now, Now! Oh boy! The Thompson Twins are releasing a 40th Anniversary Edition of Into the Gap, remixed in Dolby Atmos Spatial Audio. They released a teaser track for Hold Me Now that's really nice (though a few odd choices were made in the mix that surprised me). Super Deluxe Edition is releasing a Blu-Ray Audio with 30 bonus tracks to commemorate the occasion, and I don't think I've ever pressed an "ORDER" button so fast...

One of my favorite albums ever. Can't believe it's FORTY YEARS OLD! I don't want to think about how old that makes me.

   
And now I think I should probably turn in early. Really hope I'm not too tired to sleep.

Few films catch me totally off-guard.

Most recently, it was The Fall Guy which was SO smart and SO funny. Ryan Gosling continues to knock it out of the park, and this was just another feather in his cap. If you love movies and haven't seen it yet, you owe it to yourself to take a look...

But when it comes to one of the biggest surprises for me in my cinematic viewing history, 2013's The Secret Life of Walter Mitty is high on the list. I'd never been a big Ben Stiller fan, the critics didn't think much of it, and the trailer looked okay but never sold it as must-see material...

But here's the thing... it starts out a little bit disjointed, strange, and overstuffed with attempts at whimsy... but builds into one of the singular most beautiful films I have ever seen. I've rewatched it more times than I can count. It speaks to me in a way that few other films have. It's the very definition of essential cinema to me.

The videos below have spoilers, so if you haven't done yourself the supreme favor of watching The Secret Life of Walter Mitty, then get on that before continuing.

A couple days ago a video on YouTube hit my feed which shows some love for the movie that's much deserved...

From there I found other videos which rightly assess the film...

Turns out a lot of people have a lot of big feelings about this exceptional movie.

I also found this interview with Stiller discussing his movie...

Every time I watch the movie again, I am dying to know if Ben Stiller is aware of how much The Secret Life of Walter Mitty means to those who love it so much.

I sure hope he does.