I don't watch The Olympics because I find it hard to give a shit. It all seems like exploitation and abuse wrapped in a flag, and it really irks me that there are Olympians who are struggling to afford to eat and pay rent while billions of dollars are being tossed around the event.

But every once in a while a heartwarming story gets through.

I've made no secret of my love of Türkiye. It's a wonderful country with wonderful people, and I obssess over it more than a little bit. I loved my visit and dearly wish I could return one day.

Along with my love of the country, is a love of their entertainment. I love their TV shows and movies (Kardeşim Benim is one of my all-time favorite flicks), and I really love their reality television shows. The Türkiye version of Survivor is the best.

So it comes as no surprise that this story coming out of the Olympcs is just so epic. And also so very Türkiye. I give you Yusuf Dikeç...

   
Now see, if the Olympics was nothing but stuff like this, I would absolutely tune in!

June 29th was the sixth anniversary of my mom's passing. I wrote this entry, but didn't feel like reading through it to post until now...

There's a rule of thumb which states that the amount of time it takes to get over someone is half the time you were together. If you were together 10 years, then it takes 5 years to get over them not being in your life any more. And though this was coined about relationships, it can easily apply to anybody, really. I was close to my mom since birth, which means I was with her 52 years. I assume this meant I'd be 78 before I'd be over her passing. Assuming such a thing were even possible. It's my mom, after all. How do you get over that?

My mom only made it to 73½ years, which makes it easy for me to envision never making it to my 78th birthday.

But here's the thing... I think there's levels to being over somebody close to you who has died. At least that's how it's been for me...

• The first level is where you're inconsolable. You can't imagine how you will ever be able to carry on... ever be able to be happy again. You think about that person multiple times a day and it cuts you to you core. For me this was the first six months. Fortunately I had cats to feed or else I probably wouldn't have gotten out of bed in the morning.
• The second level is where you're starting to accept that life goes on, but randomly think about the person all the time and the waves of sadness makes you think this is just your life now. This lasted for weeks after the first anniversary of her passing.
• The third level is where all the sadness and all the bad things start to mostly fade away leaving you only happy memories. I could start looking through our travel books again and be joyous that I had such a great relationship with my mom and got to do so many wonderful things with her. Sure Mother's Day, birthdays, anniversaries of their passing, and other memorable dates (like Christmas) are tough, but they're manageable. Mom's birthday that came four years after she passed was when I crossed this threshold. From then on I had made peace with no longer having her around and stopped feeling like I was enduring some kind of torture.
• The fourth level is where you aren't thinking of the person all the time. And when you do, it's without the kind of deep sadness that rips through you. From here on it's just your new reality. You miss them (sometimes more than others) but you've moved on. I notice a photo of mom hanging somewhere or see a Facebook memory of somewhere I went with her and it's almost like I'm looking through it. Do I still miss her? Of course I do. But I rarely think about how much I miss her... it's just a photo that makes me think "Oh yeah, that was a fun trip" followed by a flash of sadness that she's gone, and then I carry on.
• The fifth level was where it just all... stopped... for me. And I remember the day clearly. It was Mother's Day of this year. The night before I went to bed dreading waking up on the day that was most special to me because it was the day I'd buy her a card and ask her where our next trip would be. Then I'd make plans and take her there. In the five Mother's Days past, it hurt realizing that there were no more trips to be had. No more Mother's Day cards to give. But Mother's Day 2024? For whatever reason I woke up, looked through the photo book of our final trip together, and thought "Kinda cool that our last trip was to someplace as amazing as Zimbabwe!" Then I put the book back on the shelf and went to work feeling nothing but happy that I had such a great mom and was able to see the world with her. Now I just coast on all the good memories when they pop up (while still missing her, of course), and that's it. No more random panic attacks from the crushing realization I don't have a mom any more. Because I still do, and I can think about her any time I like...

And here it is, six years since my mom died. It feels like I'm writing all this in a detached kind of way. I'll say "This is what happened and this is the awful way it felt," but from an observational point of view. I'm not reliving it every time. I'm not in there feeling it any more. Thankfully, I'm not able to feel it any more.

And it's very strange putting that out there, because I honestly didn't think it would ever happen. Or at least not until I was 78 years old...

In many ways I still feel robbed. It's not fair that she got dementia and the last four years of her life were so hard (for her and for me). It's not fair that I didn't get another ten years of her company. It's just not fair. And I don't think that feeling will ever go away. Even though I fully realize that there are people out there who got less time with their mom or had a terrible relationship with her, and I'm so very, very lucky...

So, um... yeah.

Still wishing I had mom around.

No longer sad that she's not around because my mind just doesn't go there with her any more. It goes places like this...

It's all happiness, gratitude, and love from here on out.

A month ago I came home from floating on the rive in absurd heat to find Jenny wouldn't come near me after I applied lotion on my sunburn. Apparently she didn't like my new smell, and would rather run away than get her nightly pets before I fall asleep.

Jake on the other hand?

Oh of course he as all over me, because no amount of smells or burning flesh was going to deter him...

last night when I got home, one of the little monsters had knocked the bottle of moisturizer on the floor of the bathroom, and I remembered thinking that it was either Jake (by accident) or Jenny (on purpose), and that I will probably have to stop leaving stuff out on the bathroom vanity.

Or leave anything out anywhere, because although my cats are really good about not pushing things onto the floor, apparently their cat nature takes over sometimes.

Or Jenny really, really hates my moisturizer.

I'm buried in work today, but fear you not... because an all new Bullet Sunday starts... now...

   
• Overrated Olympians! Michael Phelps the greatest Olypian of all time? Eh. Here's something to keep in mind as you're watching the Olympic Games...

He's not wrong.

   
• Whoa! I have wondered for years and years why Hallmark never made a movie from a man's point of view. I understand their audience is mostly women, but you'd think that they would love seeing things from the opposite viewpoint! They kinda got onboard with Three Wise Men and a Baby, which must have been a success. Because Hallmark decided to not recycle the same stuff for the millionth time and give us a trio of films that switch things up...

I don't get Hallmark Channel any more, but I will be finding a wy to buy it to watch these films because this looks really good, by Hallmark standards... maybe by any standards! Nice!

   
• ARTICLE: I have aphantasia: my mind's eye is permanently closed! Every time I read a new article about somebody finding out they have aphantasia, I have a flashback because I went through the exact same thing. It was in my mid-30's. I was hanging out with some fellow graphics people after a job in Seattle. Somebody was describing what they wanted to do for the next project and said "I'm having a tough time picturing it though." Then somebody else piped up and said "I have aphantasia... so I can't picture anything!" And I sat there like "What's aphantasia?" And was then told that most people when they close their eyes can LITERALLY visualize stuff when they concentrate on picturing it. I, on the other hand, only see blackness. When I am "picturing" something in my head, I'm not actually seeing anything... I'm just describing to myself what I know the things look like. And, yes, it is very bizarre to me how it works for others. Because it would be so cool to picture stuff literally instead of figuratively when I close my eyes to see something. I would love to close my eyes and be able to look at Von Gogh's Starry Night... but instead I see nothing but black and I have to describe it to myself based on what I remember.

   
• Olypian! I've already mentioned how I'm not an Olympics guy... I absolutely love stories like this...

If you don't care about coming in last... have money to burn to chase qualifying competitions around the world... and your only goal is to be an Olympian? There you go! This is so great.

   
• Tabasco Hot! I've been re-watching all the James Bond movies for the hundredth and noticed something odd...

I wonder who it is involved with James Bond who loves Tabasco? Nick Nack brings it to Scaramanga in The Man with the Golden Gun and Stromberg has it on the table in The Spy Who Loved Me. It's kinda cool that Bond villains love Tabasco so much, they have it flown in to wherever they are!

   
• Country-fied! I've never been a Country music fan and, when I listen to it, it's usually the classic stuff. But ever since Kacey Musgraves's album Golden Hour was my second-favorite album of 2018, and Sam Hunts album Southside made my list in 2020, I've been listening to the Contemporary Country more and more. So much so that YouTube has started suggesting Country artists thanks to my playlists on YouTube Music. This morning I got recommended the song Laid Back by Chris Housman, an artist I never heard of before. Turns out he a part of the ever-expanding Gay Country genre that has been cranking out some amazing music...

It's such a good song. Nice that we're getting such a diverse pool of artists across all genres of music. Gatekeeping is so last week.

   
• Fuck. This. Shit. Cut out the fucking middle man. Medicare for All. Do you know how much health care could be had for 70 FUCKING BILLION DOLLARS... which doesn't even count the operating costs of these shitty fucking insurance companies, which are not designed to provide good care... but to maximize profits. And look how successful they are at that...

Health care in this country is so fucking broken and will remain broken so long as insurance companies are allowed to own our politicians.

   
And now I gotta get back to work. I have fucking medical bills to pay for.

I don't usually feature other people's content... it's a rare event. But I saw this tweet being shared and love it so much that I couldn't help myself.

Courtesy of @Micahs_Nice and @EmmieAward19 comes the ULTIMATE. BRO. SLEEPOVER! Which should totally be a normal event that happens all the time!

My first thought?

"Sounds epic! UNTIL HE FINDS OUT THAT HIS WOMAN IS USING THIS AS AN OPPORTUNITY TO GO BACK TO HER SMALL HOMETOWN TO VISIT HER PARENTS... AND HAVE AN AFFAIR WITH ANOTHER DUDE! DON'T DO IT, BRO! SHE'S CHEATING ON YOU!!! DON'T YOU WATCH ANY HALLMARK MOVIES?!?"

I'm terrible.

But not without reason...

One of my favorite things to watch is home renovation shows. My favorite streaming service is YouTube. So when I find a new home renovation show that I like on YouTube, I am all in. I watch every episode available and then subscribe so I can pore over every new video that comes along.

Last week YouTube, which is well aware of what I like to watch, dropped a video from Tyler and Todd, two guys who bought 10 acres of land in Nova Scotia and are building a shipping container home there with their two dogs Eddie and Charlie and their cat Squirrel. They are incredibly entertaining, have a lot of great ideas, and I was immediately obsessed with their videos...

Todd, Tyler, Eddie, and Charlie (Squirrel not pictured)

More amazing than the work they do is the fact that they've been married for ten years and have been together for fifteen! Now, I've been involved in many home renovation projects, and I cannot fathom having a relationship last through that drama for 15 minutes, let alone 15 years! So good on them.

I think this is the first video I watched of theirs? What I like most about their channel is that they aren't only building stuff, they also talk a lot about their lives and what's going on, which is just as interesting as the work they do...

In fact, their lives have been so interesting that they started a podcast to discuss it. Their first episode of Tangents goes into some good depth about how they got to where they are now...

What blows me away is their work ethic. They are darn hard workers, having multiple jobs in their early twenties to save up money for all their doing now. So much for the myth that modern generations are lazy and don't want to work.

But anyway...

Whether you start at the very beginning where they quit their jobs to wander North America in an RV... or when they first bought The Land and started living out of a dome... or when they decided to build the shipping container home... or even when they bought a cabin to live in and renovate until the shipper container home is finished... there's no bad place to dig in.

Tyler and Todd on Youtube.

Strap yourself in, because this is a long one.

Sorry, but I got stories to tell.

It all started when I was on Facebook I saw this map (thanks to Terrible Maps) pointing out the drunkest city in every state...

And so...

I was going through this map trying to check off all the cities in states I've been drunk in: Pullman, Boise, Corvallis, Las Vegas, Park City, Dallas, New Orleans, ALL OF WISCONSIN, Nashville, Lexington, Cincinnati, Savannah, Virginia Beach, Atlantic City, Boston, New York City, and Lewiston.

That's 17.

Out of 50.

So a full one third of them. Which I'd like to chalk up to my having traveled a lot... but is more likely a consequence of my having drank a lot.

And because I am up with a gippy tummy and cant sleep, I present to you all 17 times I was drunk in the drunkest city of these states...

• Pullman, Washington: AKA that time I got drunk up the Wazzu. Pullman is home to Washington State University, AKA WSU, AKA Wazzu. It's a city in the middle of nowhere (an hour-and-a-half south of Spokane, ten minutes from the Idaho border, which tells you everything you need to know). I was there for training on a subject I didn't want, didn't need, and felt was a total waste of my valuable time. Remarkably, I found out that all I had to do was pick up my badge, sign in, and I was marked as having taken the class. You have no idea how quickly I bailed and ended up at The Coug, a nearby bar that absolutely did not believe in over-serving once I had too many. But I ran across a loophole whereas I volunteered to buy a round for the table next to me if one of the beers could be for me. Something I did twice. Now beyond sobriety, I told the table that I was going to walk back to The Hampton Inn and asked if somebody could point me in the right direction. At which point they told me that it would be a 40 minute walk. I had gotten a ride to class, and didn't realize it was so far away. One of the guys from the table said he'd run me there because it would only take a couple minutes by car. I took him up on it because I had bought him two beers. On the way to his car he introduced himself. Turns out I knew his older brother. Small world.
• Boise, Idaho: AKA that time I got drunk because I was in Boise. Come on. What else is there to do in Boise frickin' Idaho? This was a stop on a drive with my girlfriend at the time, who wanted to visit her parents in EASTERN MONTANA But didn't want to fly, so I had to drive. 12-1/2 hours. It was one of the worst things I ever did and our relationship didn't survive it. On the way back we were dumb enough to take an EIGHT HOUR DETOUR so we could pay a quick visit to Yellowstone and "experience" Southern Idaho. It was the only good thing about the trip... until we actually made it to Boise to stay the night. I was so frickin' done at that point that I got just drunk enough not to lose my mind. She ended up having to drive the 3-1/2 hours to Pendleton the next morning so I could sleep off my hangover. I then drove the remaining 3-1/2 hours home. Which was almost entirely in silence. My biggest regret (other than taking the trip in the first place) was that I didn't get drunk when we passed through Butte as well. That would have been another city for this list, and probably would have made the journey a bit less awful.
• Corvallis, Oregon: AKA that time I got drunk with a cats. The title says it all. I went to a house party. There was a cat named Rover. I spent all night drinking and petting Rover. Eventually Rover left and I was very drunk. Apparently you lose track of your alcohol consumption when a cat is around. Fortunately I was a guest of the house so I didn't have far to go to get to my bed. The next morning I stumbled out of the guest room with a hangover to find something for breakfast. That's when I found out from my host that I hadn't been petting a cat, I had been petting cats... plural. As in three of them. In my defense, they did look a lot alike. Rover, Chuck, and Tom. All were girl cats. The situation was just as confusing to me as when I was (mostly) sober as it had apparently been while I was drunk.
• Las Vegas, Nevada: AKA that time I got drunk on power... but mostly alcohol. It would be easier to count the times I went to Vegas and didn't get drunk than it would to find a story that's suitable to tell where I was drunk. Let's go with the time that I got drunk barhopping in The Wynn (a hotel I ended up in often from work). I had just got off work and wasn't flying back until the day after next because it was cheaper to pay for a night at the hotel than it was to fly back home after I was off. When you're there alone, Las Vegas is one of the loneliest places on earth (despite being surrounded by tons of people) so I decided to drink. And drink I did. First I drank for free while playing slots... got tired of watered down drinks... then decided to drink everywhere else you could drink. While exiting the lobby bar, a guy covered in a bunch of electronics asked if I could help him out, as his phone charger had come unplugged. I went to plug it back in and... ended up getting electrocuted. It was so shocking (pun intended) in my inebriated state that I passed out for a second. Next thing I know there's a bunch of people trying to sit me upright while the guy I was helping was asking if he should call an ambulance. Instead of going to the hospital I went back into the bar and had another drink.
• Park City, Utah: AKA that time I got drunk at the wrong hotel. I got stuck in Park City when I missed my ride back to SLC. So I decided to just grab a cheap hotel since I was too tired to figure out a way back. After checking in, I went to a bar down the street and drank. A lot. So much that I didn't remember which way I came and left going the wrong way. Ended up at an entirely different hotel. Not knowing what to do, I explained the situation to the front desk. They called the first hotel in the opposite direction, confirmed that this was the hotel I was at, THEN TOOK ME IN THEIR SHUTTLE BACK TO MY HOTEL BECAUSE THEY DIDN'T TRUST ME TO GET BACK ON MY OWN! Boy do I have a lot of stories like that. Too many.
• Dallas, Texas: AKA that time I got drunk waiting for fries that never came. After having been in L.A., I stopped in Dallas on my way to Atlanta to visit the new Hard Rock Cafe there. The property was a disappointment, so I said good bye to a friend that met me there and ran to Reunion Tower so I could see the city at dusk from the observation deck. Closed for renovation. I went back to my hotel, blogged about my visit, then decided to call it an early night and get some sleep before my early flight. Instead I went downstairs for a nightcap. Or several. Eventually I was told that if I wanted another drink I had to order some food. I wasn't drunk (yet), but food sounded great, so I ordered fries. While I waited for my fries to arrive, the guy who told me to order food left, and I ended up ordering more drinks from the woman who took over because I had food coming. Except my fries never came, so I asked where they were. Turns out the order was never turned in and the kitchen was closing. Now I was absolutely drunk and had no fries to absorb all that alcohol. The woman took pity on me and brought out numerous tiny bags of pretzels. I was still drunk when I got on the plane the next morning... where I was served yet another tiny bag of pretzels.
• New Orleans, Louisiana: AKA that time I got drunk for the first time. Look, I have gotten drunk ever single time I've been lucky enough to visit my favorite American city. And I've blogged many of them. My first time getting drunk was in New Orleans after winning a state DECA competition. My supervisor couldn't make it, so I was in the city alone and unsupervised two weeks before my senior year of high school... at the young age of 17. Drinking age was 18, but absolutely nobody asked for my ID so I ended up drinking way more than I should have. Unaccustomed to being drunk, I was a bit of a mess and left my new Kodak Disc camera in a taxi. But don't feel too bad, I may have lost my camera but I also ended up losing my virginity. Ah New Orleans. I've been to The Big Easy dozens of times, but that first time was pure magic.
• ALL OF WISCONSIN: AKA that time I got drunk on cheese and gave a guy constipation. I've been drunk in cities all over the state, so I guess I just pick one? But which one? Lots of good Milwaukee stories. HA! And that one time in Madison. But let's go for something less obvious, shall we? One of my work sites was 15 minutes south of Fond du Lac. Most of the times I was put into campus housing, but one time I wasn't. So I ended up at a hotel in Fond du Lac (French for "the foot of the lake" or something). It was a real shithole that looked nothing like the pictures, so I decided to celebrate my misfortune after my last day of work by heading to a bar down the street. But before I left the hotel, I cruised by the lobby where they had a big plate of snacks out. I asked if I could take some cheese with me as a snack for when I walked to the bar. The woman said she'd "hook me up" and came back with a massive bag of cheese cubes. She said she had loads of cheese that was expiring, so I might as well have it. And when I say it was a massive bag, I mean massive. Take a gallon Ziploc bag and triple that. And so I walked over to the tavern that was 10 minutes away eating cubes of cheese. When I got to the bar I asked if it was okay to bring my cheese in with me if I left a good tip. I was expecting to get the "NO OUTSIDE FOOD ALLOWED!" drama, but the barkeep said he didn't care what I did. So I sat at the bar and ordered drink after drink while eating tons of cheese out of my big bag on the bar. A guy took the seat next to me and asked "So you're just going to sit there drinking and eating cheese?" I told him this was my life now, and he shouldn't knock it until he tried it. At which point I was sharing my pile of cheese cubes with him. He then informed me that he was going to end up constipated and it was all my fault. The barkeep, however, din't blame me for anything because I did indeed give him a great tip.
• Nashville, Tennessee: AKA that time I got drunk waiting for somebody who never showed up. Because of this blog, I end up "knowing" a great many people wherever I go. One time I was in Nashville for work and had a Blogography reader from the city ask if I wanted to meet up for a drink. I said sure, then went to the restaurant to wait for him. After he was 15 minutes late, I had a drink. Then another. Then another. Then another. Pretty soon an hour had flown by so I went ahead and ordered dinner without him. And more drinks. I finally gave up and took a taxi back to my hotel. Miffed, I emailed the guy telling him that I was at the restaurant for nearly three hours and finally left. Then I passed out. When I woke up I had an email from the guy I was supposed to meet. He apologized profusely and said he had an emergency pop up, then asked if we could meet up that night instead. I said sure again. This time he showed up before I did. That's when he apologized again and said that he had to take his daughter to the hospital. I said "The hospital? Holy cow, what are you doing here then?" Turns out that she works there. He had to drive across the city to take her to work, then get her car fixed. This was pre-mobile-phone days, so he had the valid excuse that he "couldn't contact me." Except he could have called the restaurant and saved me from a hangover, so it wasn't much of an excuse. I was going to mention it, but he paid for dinner... which excuses a great many things.
• Lexington, Kentucky: AKA that time I got drunk with a bunch of bloggers. Hollywood Nights, baby.
• Cincinnati, Ohio: AKA that time I got drunk for Jesus. Like you wouldn't get drunk after visiting The Creation Museum.
• Savannah, Georgia: AKA that time I got drunk from too much Paula Deen. Oh boy. I went to Savannah for a work conference about web sales. One of the activities was a visit to the Paula Deen warehouse where all her cooking stuff is distributed. This was before her controversy involving using racial slurs (in the worst way possible), so she was everywhere in that warehouse. She slapped her face on every product, and there were a lot of products. I was so fucking sick of Paula Deen's face that I headed straight to a bar after the conference was over so I could drink to forget. Four years and two months later, I'm betting it was Paula Deen who was drinking to forget as she lost everything.
• Virginia Beach, Virginia: AKA that time I got drunk in drag. Many years before drag queens were being wrongfully vilified by a bunch of weird assholes trying to deflect from their own bullshit, I attended my first drag show in Virginia Beach. It was such a great time. So great that I can't even remember why I was in the city. I only remember that incredible night where I got incredibly drunk while being fully entertained. And while I didn't end up in drag makeup, a queen did wrap her boa around my neck, put her hat on me, and sing to me during her number after she found out it was my first time at a drag show. It was everything you could hope for. Except RuPaul wasn't in attendance, and she was the only drag queen I knew. It was a couple years before the first episode of RuPaul's Drag Race would air.
• Atlantic City, New Jersey: AKA that time I got drunk because John F. Kennedy Jr. died. I was in New York the day after John F. Kennedy passed and it felt like the whole city was mourning. The vibe was sad and hopeless. So I decided to head to Atlantic City to get away. My seat-mate on the bus was also escaping the city, and we spent nine hours together talking about our lives as we rode the bus, gambled, visited the Hard Rock Cafe, then rode back to NYC (which I wrote about in this blog entry). I was drinking the whole time, of course, and ended up pretty lit. I am not an emotional person, but when I got back to NYC and bid my new friend adieu, I went straight to a restaurant with a full bar so I could continue on drinking and keep from having a mental breakdown. It was either that or join in on the despair that fell over the city and burst into tears.
• Boston, Massachusetts: AKA that time I got drunk because the Red Sox won... or lost... or something. One of life's greatest joys is getting drunk at Fenway while watching a Red Sox game. A veggie dog. A beer. The Green Monster. A blue sky. And the Red Sox. Then more beer and more beer and more beer. You kinda have to get drunk because if the BoSox win, you're already in a party mood. If they lose, you're inebriated and it doesn't hurt as much. The drunkest I ever got at a game was courtesy of the guys seated behind me who had money and kept buying everybody drinks. "Yah wann-ah nuh-dah bee-ah der bud-eh? Well fuck yeah I wanna beer if you're buying! And I had many, many beers on a flawless Summer day. I think we won. Either way, I left happy. It's impossible not to be happy at a Red Sox game. Have no idea who we were playing.
• New York City, New York: AKA that time I got drunk in The Big Apple's then bought an Apple. I was in NYC for work. I closed a massive deal for the charity I worked with. To celebrate, I met up with my colleagues at a pub in Midtown Manhattan. The rest of the night is a blur. And when I woke up the next morning I had upgraded my iPhone to the latest model. I have zero recollection of how, when, or where I bought it. Though I had a bag from The Apple Store, so at least I didn't steal it. Though I wouldn't know for sure until I got my credit card bill a couple weeks later. Drunk shopping is the best shopping, isn't it? Sure. Until you have to pay the price...
• Lewiston, Maine: AKA that time I got drunk across the river in both Mexico and Ireland then went to work. For over a decade I had work that took me to Maine twice a year. And every time I would stay at the Hilton Garden Inn Riverwatch in Auburn. There were not a lot of restaurants within walking distance, and so I asked at the front desk if there was anything I could try instead of the same old places. I was recommended a Mexican-Irish(!) restaurant across the river in the city of Lewiston. Named "Pedro O'Hara's" they had a menu and atmosphere I liked. Plus a full bar. My work was often at odd hours with a schedule that could change on a dime. On one such incident, my work was pushed an entire day, after which I went for dinner at Pedro O'Hara's and drank. A lot. Because there was nothing else to do. I could walk back to my hotel, so no biggie, right? But what can be pushed can also be un-pushed, something I found out the hard way. Not able to drive, I had to take a pricey taxi ride to work (which I had to pay for). Then try to work while under the influence (which came surprisingly easy to me). Fortunately, the people at my worksite drove me back to my hotel so I didn't have to pay for another taxi. Unfortunately, I had to be back at my worksite at 3am. I had sobered up just fine, but was in no mood to work. But who is at 3:00 in the morning?

Interesting to note that I've been to a lot of these cities, I just didn't get drunk in them. Which is to say that the damage could have been so much worse. I could have gotten drunk in Tallahassee instead of Destin, just 2-1/2 hours away. I could have gotten drunk in Iowa City after visiting The Field of Dreams. I SHOULD have gotten drunk in Boulder. And Tempe! Oh well. Maybe when I retire I can make a run though all 50 states and get this figured out.

Are you kidding me?

International cat DAY?

EVERY DAY IS INTERNATIONAL CAT DAY! Ask any cat owner! Cats demand it!

Because they're cats.

The longer I live on this earth, the more I'm convinced that humans are the most inhumane creatures on the planet. We seem intent on destroying each other and destroying the planet we live on... along with every other creature that exists here. So much needless cruelty by people who enjoy being cruel.

This morning I wanted to sign up for a newsletter. Before the form would process, I had to "Confirm Humanity"...

Fortunately I passed the test.

Because there are days I seriously wonder if my existence is some kind of A.I. hallucination in a computerized simluation to see how many horrors my subroutines can endure before my program terminates itself.

At least now I have something I can show to people when they ask how I know I'm real.

Though I was kinda wishing I was a robot.

Why wouldn't I? Just look at what humanity hath wrought.

Poor Jake.

He's been getting more and more agitated lately, and I'm not sure what's up. I'm going to try to get him into the vet sometime soon to see if it's anything physical. I hope that his urinary problems haven't returned after all these years. He doesn't seem to have any trouble at the litter box. Though he has started announcing when he poops.

In the meanwhile, he's got this kind of ennui thing going on at random times where he seems depressed. Or bored. Or something. Trying to engage with him is tough because all he wants to do is get petted and fall asleep...

Maybe it's because it's been too hot out for him to go out to the catio? He has been going out at night when it's cooler, but he does spend a lot of time looking out the window during the day. If he goes outside, it's just for a few minutes.

Or maybe he's just getting old and cranky like his sister.

And me.

Put your Mouseketeer ears on... because a very special, all new D23 Edition of Bullet Sunday starts... now...

   
• D23! I've been fixated on all things Disney since I was a kid, and it's not something that's faded away. As I've gotten older I've just shifted my focus to the work that goes into making Disney happen. The animation that goes into the films and shows. The imagineering that goes into the parks and properties. The drive. The creativity. The planning. It's all so fascinating to me. Which means the D23 Expo which Disney puts on to announce the stuff that's going on is something I look forward to each year. So let's take a look at some of my favorite things that happened, shall we?

   
• Villains Land! While Disney has been teasing this for decades, Universal Studio's Universal Monsters Land at their upcoming Epic Universe park finally made them get off their stupid asses and actually make it happen. For the love of God I don't understand why Disney has been so regressive in their parks given how profitable they are. They limp along, giving us remakes of old rides by slapping new window dressing on them like Tiana's Bayou Adventure... drop new attractions after frustratingly long intervals like Guardians of the Galaxy: Cosmic Rewind, Mickey's Runaway Railway, and TRON: Lightcycle Run... but the only thing that's really been new-new at the American parks has been Star Wars: Galaxy's Edge Land from five years ago. Meanwhile Universal Studios has been eating their lunch by dropping tons of cool stuff at their parks on a regular basis and building an entirely new park. So thank you, Universal, for being the reason that Villains Land is finally happening...

Copyright ©2024 by Disney

Getting new attractions beats having Disney whining about stagnating attendance. BUT WHEN YOU KEEP RAISING PRICES IN A POOR ECONOMY WHILE NOT DOING SOMETHING EPIC TO DRAW IN NEW VISITORS, WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU EXPECT?!? It's like Disney management is brain dead. They just want to keep the status quo, not spend any money to do great things people want to see, then expect people will continue to pay for that just because their Disney. It's just so bizarre.

   
• Monsters, Inc. Land! Wow. It's like Disney has been reading my blog or something. I have long said that Disney Parks is missing a massive opportunity by saddling Monsters, Inc. with lackluster attractions. Laugh Floor is boring. And the videos of Mike & Sulley to the Rescue! doesn't look much better with its lackluster animatronic retreads from the disastrous Superstar Limo ride that was a total bomb. But creating Monstropolis at Disney Studios and coming up with an actual attraction that's worthy of the movies? I'm all in...

Copyright ©2024 by Disney and Pixar

Copyright ©2024 by Disney and Pixar

Copyright ©2024 by Disney and Pixar

Interesting that Disney doesn't have a suspended coaster attraction and this will be the first one. Looks darn good, if the implementation is anything like the concept art. Reeeeeally going to need to convey massive depth for that to work. Looks like it's not, so I hope that there's an illusion or screen extension or something...

I'm hopeful that Disney doesn't cheap out on this, because it could be such a cool attraction if they put the money into it.

   
• Cars Land... East! California Adventure has had a Cars Land for a while. It features the excellent Radiator Springs Racers attraction, a version of which is coming to... Frontierland in Magic Kingdom? FRONTIERLAND?!? Bonkers. Apparently this will be themed to the American West to "fit in"... albeit in an animated contemporary setting (seriously... this is bonkers). Which is essentially a mountain version of Radiator Springs Racers...

Copyright ©2024 by Disney and Pixar

Copyright ©2024 by Disney and Pixar

There's also a kid-friendly ride coming, which looks like a retread of Autopia. Something I thought would happen to the literal Autopia in Disneyland and Tomorrowland Speedway in Magic Kingdom...

Copyright ©2024 by Disney and Pixar

Don't know if this means that Tomorrowland Speedway will be paved over for something new, exciting, and completely inappropriate for the space... but we can hope!

   
• Talk About Bruno! It would appear that Walt Disney World is paving over Dinoland U.S.A. in Animal Kingdom to create a Tropical Americas Land. This will involve a new Encanto attraction that's a ride through Casa Madrigal...

Copyright ©2024 by Disney and Pixar

Copyright ©2024 by Disney and Pixar

And they'll also be tearing out the theming in DINOSAUR to make it become a new Indiana Jones attraction. Which is ironic given that DINOSOAUR is a retread of the much, much better Countdown to Extincion attraction that used to be there. The Indy ride will have a bit of a head start because DINOSAUR uses the same vehicles that are used in the Indiana Jones Adventure ride in Disneyland...

Copyright ©2024 by Disney and Lucasfilm

Copyright ©2024 by Disney and Lucasfilm

No idea what in the heck these attractions have to do with animals to belong in Animal Kingdom, but here we are. Remember when Disney was focused on building immersive experiences that created entire worlds? Well that's out the window now, apparently (see: Cars Land above). At least Pandora tried to build attractions that have alien animals in it.

   
• Avengers... Assemble? I haven't been to Disneyland's Avengers Campus because the scathing reviews make it sound like there's just no reason to go. They slapped Guardians of the Galaxy all over Tower of Terror then surrounded it with crap which has impressed nobody. Apparently Disney is finally going to address that by tossing in two new "E-Ticket" attractions. The fist being Stark Flight Lab (featuring Robert Downey Jr.)...

Copyright ©2024 by Disney and Marvel Studios

The second ride is Infinity Defense which will have you helping the Avengers battle Thanos in New York...

Copyright ©2024 by Disney and Marvel Studios

The ride vehicles makes it look like this is a rehash of what Universal Studios did for their Spider-Man ride. Regardless, it also looks I finally may have a reason to give a shit about California Adventure again. That's nice.

   
• Coco! And speaking of California Adventure, it's also getting a new boat ride based on Coco, which will hopefully be a wash of color with fantastic animatronics and a good story as promised in the concept art...

Copyright ©2024 by Disney and Pixar

Anything less would be a complete waste of everybody's time.

   
• Avatar! And yet another new attraction announced for California Adventure is something based on Avatar: Way of Water that's, surprise, another boat ride...

Copyright ©2024 by Disney and Lightstorm

Copyright ©2024 by Disney and Lightstorm

Copyright ©2024 by Disney

I don't know if this will be in California Adventure proper (which seems to be rapidly running out of room) or if it's part of the Disneyland Forward expansion. Either way, it will be nice to get some fresh IP in the park.

   
• Walt Disney: A Magical Life! The idea of having an animatronic Walt Disney talk to people ala the Abraham Lincoln attraction seems like a no-brainer. Apparently the issue was waiting for technology to catch up to the point where Disney was satisfied that Walt could be brought to life, and now we're here...

Copyright ©2024 by Disney

So as not to enrage fans of Great Moments with Mr. Lincoln, Walt Disney: A Magical Life will somehow rotate with the existing Disneyland show. I would be very interested in seeing how that's going to work. Are the show stages on motorized engines which slide them into place? Hoping that they release a behind-the-scenes documentary on Disney+ for that.

   
• Lion King Paris! Apparently Disneyland Paris is bypassing Tiana's Bayou Adventure and getting a Lion King flume ride instead...

Copyright ©2024 by Disney

Remains to be seen if they do something stupid like making the ride be some kind of unwanted sequel to the film like Tiana's Bayou Adventure or actually try to tell the story of the movie which is what everybody wants to see.

   
• Spider-Coaster Shanghai! And Shanghai Disneyland is getting a roller coaster based on Spider-Man...

Copyright ©2024 by Disney and Marvel Studios

I hope they make it more exciting than the crappy Incredicoaster that they made for California Adventure. Slapping static statues on sticks around the track is just sad.

   
• Spider-Man Hong Kong! Also in Asia? What looks like a Spider-Man drop-tower ride looks like it's coming to Hong Kong Disneyland...

Copyright ©2024 by Disney and Marvel Studios

I can't think of drop rides in Disney Parks with the exception of Twilight Zone: Tower of Terror in Magic Kingdom, the former inferior duplicate in California Adventure (which now has a Guardians of the Galaxy makeover, and another copy in Disneyland Paris. It will be nice to see a fresh take on the concept.

Sorry Tokyo Disneyland and Tokyo DisneySea, nothing new for you!

   
And that's a wrap on D23 PART ONE. See you next entry!

Did you take your Mouseketeer ears off? Well put them back on, because PART TWO of a very special, all new D23 Edition of Bullet Sunday on Monday focusing on the TV and movies stuff starts... now...

   
• Agatha! Marvel's marketing for the new Agatha Harkness series has been genius. The kept changing the title, which was worrisome... like they didn't know what they were doing... but then they announce it was Agatha All Along and the joke was too good (IYKYK). And now we have a trailer...

Looks like it could be entertaining. A little sinister. Except it also looks like there's going to be a lot of time of her coven not having powers, which isn't great. One month and some change away, so I guess we'll see.

   
• Maui! I loved Moana. It was beautifully realized, was funny in the right places, had a good story, and featured amazing songs by Lin Manuel Miranda who, sadly, isn't returning for the sequel...

Still looks stunningly beautiful.

   
• IncrediSequel! Pixar's gorgeously stylized world of The Incredibles is a real joy in my life. I've watched, studied, and obsessed the two movies over and over. And now there's a third one coming...

Copyright ©2024 by Disney and Pixar

Cannot tell you how much I'm looking forward to this!

   
• More Video! Here's a run-down on all the stuff that was talked about. Think there was also something about Percy Jackson but I don't know what it is.

• Zootopia 2 - This was a good film with fully-realized world-building that was cool to watch. Apparently they took their time to get the sequel right, so I am anticipating good things.
• Frozen 3 - The sequel to Frozen, however, was a complete mess. Overly-complex and nonsensical, I couldn't believe the direction they took the story. While it was good to see the characters again, I really hated it. Hopefully the threequel will right the ship.
• Dream Productions - A spin-off from the wildly successful Inside Out movies, I'm not a huge fan of the material so this is kinda lost on me. Maybe the concept will make things interesting enough to watch, but it doesn't seem like something I'll want to watch.
• Win or Lose - I have heard nothing about Pixar's first TV series, but it's debuting December 6th, so I guess I'll find out what it's about soon.
• Elio - I love me the sci-fi and the teasers we've gotten for Elio are almost too good to be true. Except... we're not getting anything significant about the movie. At D23 we learned that Zoey Saldaña is joining the cast and a new trailer which looks phenomenal (it's been leaked though not officially released yet). This is near the top of my list of films I'm looking forward to.
• Hoppers - A young girl who can transfer her mind into a beaver? Alan Tudyk? TAKE MY MONEY!
• Toy Story 5 - I honestly thought that the franchise should have ended with Toy Story 3 because it was such a perfect end to the story. But then we got Toy Story 4 and it was fantastic, so now I'm optimistic that Pixar can pull another miracle out of their battered old hat.
• Skeleton Crew - As much as I'm mortified at the thought of a Star Wars series featuring kids... the fact that Jude law is in this kinda has me intrigued to see how it's going to go. The trailer certainly looks interesting.
• Andor: Season 2 - One of the absolute best shows to ever come out of Star Wars (heck it's better than most of the movies too), Andor was shockingly good. And we're promised that the second and final season leading right into Rogue One is even better? Sign me up.
• The Mandalorian & Grogu - I don't like the idea that Disney is milking the franchise by cutting a movie out of it (this should have been the next season of the series) but I am excited to see it. Sure, The Mandalorian has stumbled a bit, but it's still a show I love and look forward to.
• Marvel Studios - I talked about their announcements from Comic Con here.
• Ironheart - A huge part of me wonders why this series seems to keep getting buried. Now it's not debuting until frickin' September 2025?!? At least they brought Ryan Coogler out to assure everybody it's not dead (like I'm assuming Armor Wars is). But where's info about his animated Eyes of Wakanda series? When does that come out? Is it still 2024? It had to be mentioned, but I'm not seeing it talked about?
• Daredevil: Born Again When it comes to television adaptations, the Netflix Daredevil series is top-tier. Marvel Studios knew not to mess with perfection, so they are integrating the show into the MCU. And there are few things in television land that I'm looking forward to more. Especially after watching the leaked trailer, which looks like everything we could want. When the trailer is officially released I'll definitely be breaing that down.
• Avatar: Fire and Ash - =sigh= we keep being told that the third Avatar flick will be a complete departure from what's come before. And Lord, I hope so. Because right now I can appreciate the movies from a technical standpoint because the visuals are mind-blowing, but they are only mildly entertaining from a story viewpoint. The sequel was more of the same, trying to get you to care about giant blue people by injecting tragedy into their story. I'm betting Fire and Ash will be more more of the same. How many blue kids do they have left to kill off? One for each of the planned sequels, I guess.
• Freakier Friday - This was created because of "demand" from fans, but that seems a suspect claim to be making. At least they aged up the characters so they're not pretending the sequel takes place a week after the first film.
• Lilo & Stitch (Live-Action Remake) - Oh gag. The original movie is one of my favorite films of all time. The direct-to-video sequels and television show are something I've watched many times. And what makes it perfect is that the animation was this gorgeous 2D throwback that's incredible to watch. So why make a 3D live-action remake to trash it? I will talk more about this travesty as more info is released, but right now the CGI Stitch character is abhorrent, and they really need to take another pass at it or face a "Sonic the Hedgehog" situation.
• Snow White - And speaking of shitty, unnecessary remakes... this one is highly problematic, even for Disney. Because when you've got people like Peter Dinklage outright trashing the idea, shouldn't you reconsider going there? I couldn't be less interested.
• Tron: Ares - The leaked trailer throws the series into a direction which should have been obvious after the ending of Tron: Legacy, but seemed too wild to entertain. Not too sure how I feel about Jared Leto being in this... or Jeff Bridges, which should be impossible... and it's weird that Sam and Quorra are nowhere to be found given the story, so has Tron: Legacy been removed from continuity? Is this a full-on reboot of the franchise? Very confusing.
• Mufasa: The Lion King - I'm so meh on all these live-action movies of beloved animated films. There's been so few that have been worth my valuable time (I liked The Jungle Book, but that's it) so I honestly don't care about yet another one strip-mining Disney's treasures for cash.

   
And that's a wrap on D23 because I refuse to talk about Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson's Monster Truck movie... because didn't somebody already make a monster truck movie that failed miserably?

Whoa! Better put those Mouseketeer ears back on! Turns out there's a surprise PART THREE of a very special, all new D23 Edition of Bullet Sunday on Tuesday focusing on the TV and movies stuff starts... now...

Yesterday afternoon when I took a minute for lunch I saw that Disney is confirming that in order to make room for Cars Frontierland, they're plowing over Rivers of America and Tom Sawyer Island!

I admit to being more than a little shocked. Those are staples of the "Disney park experience" in America, and I really thought that both Cars Frontierland and Villains Land would be dropped in behind Frontierland like this...

But nope! We don't know exactly how the configuation will be, but it's probably something more like this maybe...

Now, when it comes to Magic Kingdom in Walt Disney World, you can kinda get away with paving under Rivers of America and Tom Sawyer Island. It's just an abstract of the West Coast original. But if Disney announced that they were paving over Rivers of America and Tom Sawyer Island AT DISNEYLAND?!? Disney fans would probably burn the place to the ground. That was dug out by Walt Disney Himself, by God, and nobody better touch it!

   
In Disney other news...

I skipped over some important news concerning Disney Cruise Lines. They announced four additional new ships ON TOP OF the four they have being built and the five that are in operation. That's a total of thirteen ships. That's a lot of ships. But DCL is a very popular way to cruise, so I guess we shouldn't be surprised...

My mom loved cruises, and we actually cruised with Disney once. It was a fantastic cruise... and I'm saying that as somebody who is not a big fan of them. There's many, many things that Disney does right which made the experience great by comparison.

My favorite is that even though you shift to different themed dining rooms from night to night (which is so cool), your wait staff stays the same. And it made a huge difference. I loved the pizza on the ship. One night while mom and I were at dinner, I mentioned that I wish pizza was on the menu. Not only did the wait staff say "We can do that!"... they asked me every other night if I wanted to have some pizza again. Most of the times, I took them up on it, because I'd rather have pizza than bread. By the end of the cruise, I was so spoiled by my service team that I was more than a little depressed at our last dinner together. On other ships, the servers were just there and not much else. Even if their service was fantastic, you were on to other servers next time and it was forgotten.

My second favorite thing about DCL is that they have character meet-and-greets. As a massive Mickey Mouse fan, I absolutely took advantage of the opportunity to have my photo taken with him. One night at dinner I wore my Mickey sweatshirt and Mickey went ape-shit pointing and laughing at it... pantomiming "THAT'S MEEEEE!" and then he wanted a guy at our table to take a photo of us (pay no attention to how drunk I am in this photo)...

Mom made friends with Mickey, Minnie, Chip and Dale, Goofy, and... PLUTO!

Yeah. It was pretty great. Like when I met him the following day and he once again freaked out that I had him on my shirt...

My mom, on the other hand, loved Donald Duck (because he was also in the Navy) and after she explained that to Donald, he ran and got her when the YMCA started playing so they could do the YMCA dance together...

Now, I'm not saying that mom didn't have fun on the other cruises we took together. She always had fun. It's what made it so fun to take trips with her. But when I say that dancing with Donald Duck was a high that lasted the entire trip... well... it did. She talked about it for years after. It didn't make the entire cruise for her. But it came close.

There are many, many other great things about cruising with Disney. The most surprising being... sure there's kids onboard, but Disney puts a lot of effort into keeping adult guests kinda separate so they're not bothered. Since you rotate with your same table and service staff to every restaurant, mom and I had the same all adult table every night. Which was great. There's also places that adults can escape where children aren't allowed. Which is also great. I don't recall ever being bothered by any kids the whole cruise.

And also the ships are beautifully appointed and unique...

And, yes, that actually is a Dale Chihuly chandelier hanging in the atrium there.

But anyway... my days of cruising are likely over. I only ever did it because mom liked it. But if I ever were to cruise again, it would probably be with Disney.

But anyway... this should be the final part to my D23 commentary. But you never know. Tomorrow Disney could announce that they are blowing up the Matterhorn and you'll have to go find those Mouseketeer ears once again.

I don't get a lot of checks in the mail, but I get enough that I am adept at spotting them when I clear out my mailbox every week. Most of them are tiny residual checks or usage checks or clearance negotiation checks and what not. Seriously tiny. My favorites are those for pennies which cost more to mail than to pay out. A lot of the time I just toss them if they're less than $1, because they're just not worth the effort to cash. I doubt they add up to $20. And it's like... hey... $20 is $20, but if it takes signing and processing 40 checks to get it... well...

All of these checks are machine-generated into those oragami-folded nightmares where you have to fold and tear it on both sides (sometimes three sides) to even open it. Then risk a paper-cut to try to break the glue seal to unfold it. They're called "snap-pack checks," and I loathe them.

But it gets worse!

Now scum-sucking asshole companies are sending ads that look like checks. So if you are used to getting these kind of snap-packs in the mail, you go to the effort to open it to see if it's more than a dollar only to find it's not even a check at all!

But it gets worse!

Some companie DO include a real check... but it's a trap. Because if you cash it (even if it's by accident because you get a lot of these things and don't look carefully) then you've committed yourself to some kind of service or product you don't even want...

The above sample is a check for $20,000, which most people would investigate before cashing. But a check for $4.58 or whatever?

This kind of deceptive bullshit should be illegal.

But it's not because politicians get paid big money to look the other way when it comes to Americans getting scammed.

If there's an "American Way" anymore, that would be it.

I am sure there are people who go their entire lives without physical agony but, alas, I am not one of them. Kidney stones have seen to that.

And, as it turns out, food poisoning gets me there too.

I should preface this by saying that I've had a cast-iron stomache for as long as I've been alive. I don't get food poisoning. I've been around the world a dozen times and have eaten all kinds of questionable things without any ill-effects. Everything from the horrors of Nattō (fermented soybeans from Japan) to suspect cheeses of every kind... didn't affect me in the least. Any time I do get affected by something I'm not accustomed to eating, it's mild. Maybe an upset stomach for an hour or two... or a mild case of diarrhea.

But recently? Disaster.

A couple months ago I had a rice dish that made me so sick I thought that I would never be able to eat again. I was vomiting for days. A sip of water was enough to send me into painful convulsions.

And last night (or rather, tonight since I am writing this on Friday about last night)... I had food poisoning so bad that I was praying for death.

It all started when I grabbed a slice of leftover pizza as I was headed out the door. I felt a knot in my stomache within a half hour. That should have been a sign to go force myself to puke it up. But I endured. By the time I got home from work I was sweating and starting to have cramping.

Two hours after that I was rolling around in bed screaming my head off.

Around 8:00pm I swallowed an old Oxycodone I had found in my travel bag. I swallowed it dry because I had already been puking all night. Somehow I managed to keep it down and fell asleep. Or passed out. Or something.

When I woke up at 10:15pm I was still in pain, but knew the minute my pill wore off that I'd be in agony again. So I took the last decade-old Oxycodone I had and went back to sleep.

And managed to sleep through the night, not waking up until 5:30am.

My pain was still there, but dulled enough that I could go to work. Which I really, really didn't want to do... but really, really needed to do.

Now the agony is but a memory. Though a foggy one. I remember wanting to die. I know I was in pain. I'm just so far detatched from it as to wonder if maybe it was a dream. But then I found the empty bottle from my pills which expired 9 years ago and know it was all too real.

Just when I think I couldn't hate Sonos more than I already do... this happens...

Sonos laying off 100 people amid expensive app problems.

These employees aren't at fault for MANAGEMENT'S stupid fucking decisions that screwed customers and fucked the company. But of course they're the ones losing their jobs. Not management.

MANAGEMENT didn't give a shit that the app wasn't ready.

MANAGEMENT decided to fuck their customers so their headphones could ship by some date on a calendar.

MANAGEMENT sat on their asses as the company imploded when they could have just brought back the old app.

But MANAGEMENT wasn't the ones who would lose their jobs over their decisions causing customers to abandon Sonos... so why should they care?

Last week I spent three fucking hours trying to get my bedroom speakers working again after they randomly stopped the night before. Right in the middle of a song, they died and never came back. No amount of power cycling... no amount of resetting and re-adding them... no amount rebooting my fucking routers or taking down the entire system and bringing it back up again... will get them to work again.

I am told that resetting them and adding them to a different system before resetting and adding them back to mine might help. Who the fuck knows. I don't have time right now to deal with that. If I had money to burn, I would take every fucking stick of Sonos gear I own, throw it in the middle of the street, and take a flamethrower to it.

Management firing 100 employees over their idiotic decisions only makes me want to burn it faster.

Yeah, Sonos put us through all this shitty "new app" bullshit to sell some headphones before a date on a calendar. They unleashed an app that doesn't work, is missing features, and causes endless fucking problems because they just don't give a shit. Which is not surprising because they let their "Pop of Death" fault plague their Arc soundbar for years before they addressed it.

All I can do is hope that once management has destroyed Sonos to the point where it's dead that somebody finds a way of hacking their crap so it doesn't become worthless.

As I've mentioned, my cats have a serious case of FOMO when it comes to anything new and exciting. If one cat seems to be doing something interesting, the other will immediately come running to see what's happening.

This morning Jake was out in the catio when Fake Jake wandered by. He was beside himself. And when Fake Jake walked outside of his view, Jake came bombing into the living room and high-tailed it into the bedroom so he could keep watching him.

Jenny was sitting next to me when all this went down. She LAUNCHED off of me to run after her brother.

And scraped up my arm with her back feet while I was scratching her.

So that was fun.

Fortunately she decided to use her brother as a foot-rest instead of me tonight. And he was thrilled...

I don't know why Jenny loves sleeping with her feet up against something. Maybe she just likes to know she's not alone?

And who could blame her. It's been thundering like crazy.

I'm too tired to blog, but I can't seem to let it go... because an all new Bullet Sunday starts... now...

   
• Yes, Ma'am! I ADORE Dolly Parton... but I also love Post Malone. He seems so genuinely kind. Every interview I've ever seen with Posty is wonderful. And he extends Dolly the respect she's due, which scores all the points...

Doesn't hurt that he's got some truly wonderful tracks under his belt. Including this banger with Dolly herself...

Incredible that Dolly can still belt them out with the best of them.

   
• Famous! I was very sad to learn that Wally (Famous) Amos has died...

I loved his cookies and buy them often. But on top of being a cookie master, he seemed like a genuinely nice man who had some real wisdom to him. Always sad when we lose a light like Famous Amos.

   
• 私は日本人が大好きです! This gentleman is a perfect example of why I adore the Japanese people. He's very diplomatic and generous when rating the American sushi... even though it's not actual sushi...

Not joking... I could watch videos like this for hours and hours. I really need to get back to Japan for a visit one of these days. I used to go fairly often but haven't been in years and years.

   
• Money Well-Spent! Targeting marketing on Facebook is usually so bad. It's either targeting me with something I don't give a shit about and should have never been shown... or it's crap like this...

That's not Chelan County, you stupid fucks. That's King County. Chelan County is across the mountains in Redneckistan. My comment on the post...

How can I trust anything you say when you don't even know where the area is that you're targeting? I never click on this shit.

   
• HEADLINE: Californians can soon add driver’s licenses and state IDs to Apple Wallet! Of course they will! And where's tech-backwards Washington State? Killing bills which would give us digital licenses!

Thanks again to Maria Cantwell and Patty Murray for continuing to prove that they need to be voted out of office for not taking us into the future... but tying our necks to boat anchors in the past! I am fucking livid that Washington State politicians are so fucking worthless.

   
• HEADLINE: Brian Cox Says Cinema Is In “a Very Bad Way”, Cites Marvel, ‘Deadpool & Wolverine’: “It’s Become Party Time.” Today's "Old Man Yells at Cloud" moment... courtesy of Brian Cox. These short-sighted morons always fucking blowing it out their ass over something they don't understand. WITHOUT MARVEL, WHERE WOULD CINEMA EVEN BE? Marvel movies are keeping theaters open so that the art films he's pining for have a cinema to actually play in! Without Marvel Studios, a lot more theaters would likely have closed a lot earlier because cinema has been dying for years now that people can get a "good enough" experience at home. AND THEN... Cox played Stryker in one of those truly awful X-Men flicks, so... yeah... YOU'RE PART OF YOU'RE OWN PROBLEM, MY DUDE!

   
• Miss Jackson, if You're Disgusting! I don't wish anybody ill will. I honestly don't. Even a complete ass like Victoria Jackson deserves compassion. I am truly sorry that her cancer has returned. And I would never tell anybody how they should deal with such news. THAT BEING SAID... it is horrific that she choses to mock the multitudes of people who died after getting COVID. She can be a dumbass COVID denier all she wants. But I am all too familiar with the many work colleagues in Italy who were desperate to save lives as the hospitals maxed out and people had to be turned away... essentially waiting to die because overworked doctors and nurses couldn't keep up. Those early days were horrifying. And it didn't get any better as people started dying in vast numbers around the world as the pandemic took hold. So fuck you, Victoria Jackson. You must have a truly evil heart to make a punchline out of such tragedy...

I wish you well with your cancer battle, but that's all I have for you. There's nothing else I'm willing to give. If there's anything left in you that gives a shit for others, I hope you'll use your remaining time on this earth reflecting on just how awful you are and try to do better.

   
• Parts! I've watched RuPaul's Drag Race since... Season 03 I think? (but I've seen all episodes, of course). This morning I've been watching Trixie Mattel's documentary Moving Parts and was shocked to see that the queens in the Drag Race finale don't know who actually wins until the finale airs. Which means that they film multiple endings with each queen "winning" and then they edit the show to reflect who actually won. Mind. Blown.

This documentary is actually a tough watch. It was meant to document Trixie before and after Drag Race All Stars (which she won)... but ultimately a big chunk of it was the fallout of Katya's substance abuse. I was amazed that they would share some of the awful things that Katya said... but it turns out that Katya wanted it in the documentary. Because she's incredible like that. So grateful that she and Trixie made up and went on to do so many great things together. A comedy duo unlike any other that has made my life better just by existing. Highest possible recommendation for Moving Parts. Just $3 to rent.

   
Blergh. I need a blogcation.

Since I've just returned from Walt Disney World, I think I'll come up with some Disney-related posts for a while.

And I'm going to start with my favorite Disney characters.

Favorite Disney Original Characters

1. Oswald the Lucky Rabbit
   
2. Orange Bird
   
3. Mickey Mouse
   
4. Donald Duck
   
5. Pluto
   

Best Disney Modern Characters

1. Stitch from Lilo and Stitch
   I have never been so immediately captivated by a character as I was with Stitch. The minute he appeared on screen, I knew that I would be obsessed with him. And I have been ever since.
2. Sulley from Monsters, Inc.
   Not only did John Goodman bring him to life with a beautiful subtlety that somehow topped his great performance just two years earlier in The Emperor's New Groove, the character is one of the best-animated CGI characters ever made.
3. Genie from Aladdin
   Robin Williams owned the film. And that character was all him. His incredible improvisational skills and energy pushed Genie to the front of every scene he appeared in... but not to the detriment of the film.
4. Maui from Moana
   Based on the song You're Welcome! alone, you can't help but love Maui. Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson threw himself 100% into the role and made Maui far more interesting than he might have been otherwise.
5. Luca from Luca
   It will forever be sad to me that Luca was kinda lost in the shuffle of the pandemic. Not only was it gorgeous in every way, it also had a compelling story that was wonderfully served by the main character.

Favorite Disney Princesses

1. Rapunzel from Tangled
   What makes Rapunzel my favorite? I don't know whether it's that her movie is one of my favorites... or whether it's Mandy Moore's ability to match the multi-dimensional aspect of her character both emotionally and lyrically... but probably both. When it comes to Disney princesses, it's tough to do much better than this.
2. Tiana from The Princess and The Frog
   That Disney made a love letter to my favorite American city, New Orleans, wouldn't have meant much if not for the fact that they crafted a terrific story to go with it. Tiana is smart, driven, capable and a huge part of what makes everything work so well. Even when she turns into a frog. Especially when she turns into a frog.
3. Moana from Moana
   I tend to like princesses that are more take-charge and proactive in the story, and that's definitely true for Moana. She had an interesting challenge, she met it head-on, and she was changed because of it.
4. Merida from Brave
   Another character that took charge and wasn't content to sit around and wait for some dippy prince to show up and fulfill her life's ambitin. Plus she was a lot of fun to watch in action.
5. Mulan from Mulan
   You probably guessed she would be here already. The ultimate kick-ass princess, Mulan also had one of my all-time favorite voice performances in Ming-Na Wen.

Favorite Disney Princes

1. Kristoff from Frozen
   It was refreshing to finally have a (future) prince who acted like a... well... actual guy. But the thing that makes Kristoff appealing is that he so effortlessly subverts toxic masculinity tropes to be a positive example of what an actual guy should be.
2. Aladdin from Aladdin. I love that Aladdin only became a prince because he married a princess. Before that he was a "street rat" who had a life that was anything but royal. That guy worked hard to woo a princess who wasn't going to put up with his crap if he wasn't the genuine article and somebody worthy of her time.
   
3. Naveen from The Princess and the Frog
   Okay, just like I preferred Beast over Prince Adam, I preferred Naveen when he was a frog... and he was such a fun character as a frog. But Naveen has some nuance to him that at least made him interesting in human form too. So much better than Prince Adam, who might as well have been a doorknob. How Belle didn't immediately lose interest when Beast went away and Adam appeared I don't know.
4. Flynn Rider from Tangled
   Though sometimes annoying, Flynn would likely be a contender for the top spot because he's just so fully-realized and funny... and is actually a huge part of the story for once. If not for the fact that he's voiced by Zachary Levi, whom just seems to be getting worse and worse, he would likely rank higher. From being anti-vax during a fucking pandemic to his stupid-ass comments about the actors strike (actors, mind you, who were fighting for him to not be exploited by AI and be paid fairly too), he kinda ruins the character. And this is despite the fact that he did an amazing job voicing Flynn. I'm just happy that I had some years with the movie before he went all problematic.
5. Eric from The Little Mermaid
   Up until Eric happened, there weren't many prince characters who had much to do in the film. They just kinda showed up to kiss the princess and wake her up (Sleeping Beauty) or kiss the princess and wake her up (Snow White) or whatever. Eric actually had stuff to do that meant something.

Best Disney Villains

1. Yzma from The Emperor's New Groove
   Eartha. Kitt. Despite being a more comedic villain than anything truly scary, she was a great villain through and through. She made that movie. The Emperor's New Groove would have still been entertaining, but not the level of greatness it reached.
2. Ursula from The Little Mermaid
   Pat. Carroll. That woman was such a treasure, and the way she brought Ursula to life was no easy feat. The character was just so bad-ass and over-the top evil, you would have rooted for Ariel even if Ariel was not entirely good. That's the mark of a real Disney villain!
3. Scar from The Lion King
   Jeremy. Irons. I swear, the more times I watch The Lion King the more I'm convinced that Scar steals the entire movie. Which is a tall order given that James Earl Jones is in it!
4. Maleficent from Sleeping Beauty
   Eleanor Audley, whose voice was so wonderfully distinct that she actually voiced two Disney villains (she was also Lady Tremaine in Cinderella), brought a menace to the screen that you could actually feel.
5. Jafar from Aladdin
   The character was just so deliciously evil. So much so that Aladdin would have been a very different movie if his parrot Iago wasn't there to temper his menace with some humor.

Best Disney Sidekicks

1. Hei Hei from Moana
   The only thing more hilarious than the hapless, disturbed chicken himself is the fact that they got Alan Tudyk to voice his clucking. There's no scene he appears in that Hei Hei isn't stealing the show.
2. Dug from Up
   Dug was hilarious when he appeared in Up, but where he really shines is his spin-off cartoons that appeared on Disney+. Talking animals in Disney features are normalized, but here they actually gave him a reason to be talking (science!) which was a nice change of pace.
3. Sven from Frozen
   It's entirely possible that I'm projecting my love for Kristoff onto his faithful reindeer, but I honestly don't think that Kristoff's appeal would have been as great if not for what the other half of this comedy duo brought to the team.
4. Ray from The Princess and the Frog
   Jim Cummings, who has voiced such iconic characters as Winnie the Pooh and Tigger, Monterey Jack, Darkwing Duck, and the singing voice of Scar(!), plus the Tasmanian Devil(!!) took a huge left turn to voice a Cajun accent for Ray. And though the character has been criticized as being a negative Cajun stereotype, I'd argue that he's one of the wisest, bravest Disney characters yet created. And if you've seen the film, then you'd know that his loyalty is second to none. Easily one of the most positive sidekicks we've seen.
5. Pascal from Tangled
   Had I the room, I would have added both Maximus and Pascal to the list, but if forced to choose I'd give the edge to Pascal just because I love how he was animated. His range of emotions was surprisingly deep for such a little guy, and he added to the story in meaningful ways rather than being a distraction from it. But the real kicker? He is responsible for killing the villain at the end! Crazy! But so very un-Disney and cool. I just wish they had given him more to do.
6. Dory from Finding Nemo
   What's odd is that I preferred Dory to Marlin or Nemo. Ellen gave her a personality that made her more interesting, and her faulty memory made her far more interesting.
7. Iago from Aladdin
   They wanted a grating, annoying sidekick for Jafar, and it's impossible to get more annoying and grating than Gilbert Gottfried. As I mentioned above, Iago taking the edge off of Jafar made Jafar be able to be much more evil.
8. Mushu from Mulan
   Oh come on. It's Eddie Murphy. He was perfectly cast for the part and made it fairly easy to ignore that the character was woefully out of place in the actual story. Plus he miraculously managed to not let Cri-Kee (the cricket) upstage him.
9. Abu from Aladdin
   Who doesn't love a monkey? But better than that, he wasn't just a sidekick, he was an important part of the story, and his moments with Magic Carpet are some of my favorite in the film.
10. Dante from Coco
    The derpy puppy from Coco was loyal to an extreme degree and played so well against the main character with his flappy tongue and mindlessly happy attitude. There was a Dante plastic statue I saw that I would have bought if I could have found one. That's not something I say about a lot of Disney characters!

I've been to Walt Disney World many, many times because I used to have work there. Eventually I would only go into the parks to eat or get a haircut because I had rode all the attractions multiple times and don't really like standing in line. But Disney has added a bunch of stuff since I was there in September, 2019, so when I went to Orlando this time, I made a vacation out of it.

And I have some thoughts about what it takes to ride the attractions now-a-days...

Virtual Queue!
There are three rides at Walt Disney World that you can't just walk up and stand in line to ride... Tiana's Bayou Adventure, Guardians of the Galaxy: Cosmic Rewind, and TRON: Lightcycle Run. The only way to ride them is to wake up at 7am and join a "Virtual Queue" so you can earn the right to then go stand in line. Can't get a spot? Then you have to wait until 1pm to see if you can grab one then. Can't get one of those spots? Then you're out of luck. At least that's the way it is for Tiana's Bayou Adventure. For the other two rides, there's another way which I'll get to below... all it takes is money, of course. On one level, I get it. Disney really doesn't want lines so long that they don't have space to fit them. But what a bummer to go all the way to Disney World and not be able to ride something you had your heart set on. That's a huge problem, but as long as Disney continues over-sells tickets, it's an unavoidable one.

A NECESSARY ASIDE: Remember FastPass?
Back in 1999, Disney introduced the FastPass. The goal was to reduce the time you spend in line waiting to ride the most popular attractions... which, as you can imagine, is a common complaint of guests. It's essentially a "virtual queue" where you go to the ride, get a ticket with a time on it, then return at that time. In the meanwhile you can go do something else. It was a thoughtful addition. And it was FREE. And if you stayed at certain Disney hotels, they gave you a couple "universal" FastPasses that would allow you to go on any FastPass attraction without having to get a ticket. After that was FastPass+ which allowed advanced reservations. That was eventually replaced with Genie+, where you could PAY to skip the lines. Needless to say, it sucked to have to pay money to have something that used to be free.

Leeloo Dallas Lightning Lane Multi-Pass!
Fast-forward to today, and Walt Disney World has unleashed an all new version of Lightning Lane Multi-Pass, which allow you to pay in advance to reserve attractions and experiences. You pay a daily fee, then get to reserve three Lightning Lanes for attractions that have them. After you use a Lightning Lane, you then immediately get to reserve another one for later in the day. It actually works very well... assuming you're willing to pay minimum $30 a day to use the feature. Not exactly cheap, and the price can go up depending on how busy the resort is and which park you visit. Alas, this means you really have to plan out your vacation in advance, because you want to reserve those Lightning Lanes as soon as you can because popular rides will lose all available windows quickly. You can reserve seven days in advance if you're staying at a Disney resort... three days in advance if you're not. Just another way that Disney can squeeze money out of you and make their parks a perk only rich people can enjoy to the fullest.

Individual Lightning Lane!
The most popular rides in all of Walt Disney World... Seven Dwarf's Mine Train, TRON Lightcycle Run, Avatar Flight of Passage, Star Wars: Rise of the Resistance, and Guardians of the Galaxy: Cosmic Rewind do not qualify for regular Multi-Pass Lightning Lanes. Oh no. You have to pay per ride to jump those lines. And it's ridiculously expensive... currently $12 to $25 per person, per ride. Don't want to spend 90 minutes waiting to ride Star Wars: Rise of the Resistance? Pay to skip the line. All the Virtual Queue slots taken for the day but you want to ride Guardians of the Galaxy: Cosmic Rewind? Pay to ride it. This is abhorrent. Disney is happy to take money from people who might have been saving their pennies for years in order to be able to afford to go... but if they can't chip in even more money to have access to certain rides, then it's entirely possible they are beyond their reach. Given the way this works, why the fuck doesn't Disney just go back to pay-per-ride with A-to-E tickets instead of promoting the pretense that you can pay one price and ride everything? Or, ha ha ha, start capping the number of tickets they sell so their parks aren't overflowing with so many people that you don't have a hope to ride stuff unless you've got additional money to do so.

And so...

I think the way that Disney pretends to be a vacation destination for families everywhere, but is actually a vacation destination that only the wealthy can truly enjoy to the fullest, is incredibly dishonest. Instead of thinking that you can buy a ticket, take your own food, stay at a cheap resort outside of the park, avoid souvenirs, and somehow afford to "do Disney World"... Disney should just be honest and charge higher prices up-front that allow people to realistically budget how much their trip will cost.

Because the nickel-and-diming... excuse me... the hundreds-and-hundreds-of-dollaring... Disney is doing right now is absolutely awful. Rich people will always have a better experience because money doesn't matter to them. I accept that. But people who are not rich shouldn't be made poorer because Disney is misrepresenting how much it costs to have the vacation they sell you in their brochures and ads.

That's anything but magical for the "most magical place on earth."

Continuing on with my recent trip to Walt Disney World... I'm just going to put this out there, Tiana's Bayou Adventure was a hugely missed opportunity.

The re-theming of Splash Moutain was a long time coming. There was only so long that Disney could pretend that a ride based on Song of the South didn't have ties to a film filled with racist stereotypes. That they decided to use The Princess and The Frog to do this was pretty exciting. It's a great movie that's filled with awesome things to build a ride around, not the least of which was the city of New Orleans (my favorite American city). Plus the main characters are frogs! You can do some cool stuff with frogs! Plus there were other sweet characters like Louis and Ray and Mama Odie and the incredible Dr. Facilier to put in it! After the announcement, I remember thinking "Holy cow... the Disney imagineers must be going nuts designing everything!"

But Disney inexplicably threw out all of the things I was dying to see.

And I am still trying to understand why.

Instead of telling the story of The Princess and The Frog, the attraction is a sequel to the movie and continues the story. And since Dr. Facilier died in the movie, they didn't put him in the attraction. And that is categorically stupid as fuck. He is a fantastic villain that made the movie so cool. He's got magical abilities that would be visually stunning to experience. But even worse? Tiana and Naveen turned back into humans at the end of the movie, so they don't get to be frogs in the ride.

What the fuck?!?

But anyway...

The exterior of the attraction is mostly nice. I don't think it's as cool as the orange rocky mountain that tied into Frontierland and Big Thunder Mountain Railroad so well, but the greenery is pleasant, and I think that it would be particularly pretty at night (which I didn't get to experience... see yesterday's entry on why). But otherwise? Not what I was hoping to see.

In the concept art that Disney gave us, there was a big tree with a crashed boat in it that made the mountain look incredible...

The story of the ride (if you can call it that) is that Tiana is enlisting Louis's help to find musicians for a big New Orleans party that she's throwing. This is okay, in concept, but not great, in practice.

The ride queue is good. You're walking through Tiana's store, and they packed it to the gills with nifty stuff to look at. If there's a single part of the ride that's improved, this would be it.

Then the story falls apart as you board your log vehicle because you're in the bayou. So... was Tiana's store in the bayou too? I thought her restaurant was in New Orleans, so shouldn't that be where her store is? Who knows? It's sloppy shit like this that is very telling. Splash Mounain had a highly cohesive story that made sense. The new ride really doesn't.

Putting that aside, you leave the bayou and climb up to the main ride building where Tiana explains her plight to find musicians (which, in itself is crazy... YOU LIVE IN NEW ORLEANS, HOME OF SOME OF THE MOST AMAZING MUSICIANS ON THE PLANET, BUT YOU'RE GOING INTO THE SWAMP?!?). This section of the ride is really clunky because the amazing Tiana animatronic is completely frozen until your log approaches it. Very creepy. How hard would it have been to have her make movements in-between logs?

Even though you just climbed up a mountain, you're suddenly back in the bayou where Louis joins you to look for musicians. Just like Tiana, the animatronic for Louis is incredible. The other animal characters are well done as well. But here's the thing... because it's just Tiana and Louis in this story, there are long stretches of nothing in the ride because you can't be seeing two Tianas and two Louises at the same time. There has to be big breaks to keep the illusion working. And this right here is where the idea of a sequel should have been jettisoned. Because if they had followed the movie, you could have had moments with Ray and moments with Dr. Facilier filling in that space. But instead? Swamp. Wheee.

Eventually you get to Mama Odie, who shrinks you down to the size of a frog, though I don't quite understand why. But what's worse? YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND WHAT HAPPENED WHEN IT HAPPENS! I didn't understand because while, yes, the props are bigger in scale, that happens all the time in Disney rides to draw your attention to them! The second time I rode it, I heard Mama Odie say something about shrinking you down... but it's still ridiculously and needlessly confusing. You then float through the bayou at a small size for no reason until Mama Odie decides to embiggen you again.

The original Splash Mountain had a lot of fun things going on throughout, but the entire point of the ride... that massive drop... was treated with a sense of danger and foreboding. Splash Mountain didn't set out to scare you, but it did want to play a psychological game as you were climbing up to that drop. There was a frightened Br'er Rabbit and vultures lamenting your fate and harrowing music. And now that's just... gone. All the tension has vanished. And the ride suffers because of it. Mama Odie makes you big again (if you manage to understand that's what's happening), you plunge down the mountain, and there's nothing more to it. What a shame.

But anyway...

You end up back in the bayou yet again as you roll up on Tiana's big party (back in New Orleans?). Whereas Splash Mountain overwhelmed you with tons of moving parts that weren't terribly detailed as you reach the Zipadee Doo Dah riverboat, Tiana's Bayou Adventure does the same with quality animatronics that are incredibly well-done. It's quite a sight to see, and a marked improvement over the original attraction.

The end.

And that's it. That's what it took Disney four years to figure out. It may sound like I'm disappointed with the attraction. That's not really true. It's an enjoyable distraction from life that's fairly well done. What I'm disappointed in is what a huge missed opportunity this was. I expected so much more, and was ultimately let down. Tiana's Bayou Adventure isn't bad... it's just not great.

So let's recap, shall we?

The Bad...

• Story. As I hope I made clear, the story doesn't make sense. Partly because they were re-theming an old ride that had a specific story, but mostly because they made this a sequel to the movie, which was just dumb.
• Video Screens. There's some pretty important parts of the ride where they cheaped out and used big screens instead of animatronics. It's bad. Especially the big screen where Tiana and Louis are looking in at you when you're tiny, because it's so glaringly obvious. No attempt at all was made to integrate the screen into the "world" you're inhabiting. There's a migration of fireflies where they at least tried, and it makes all the difference. As background elements, screens are okay. But as a major section of the ride? No.
• Blank Space. With only two characters carrying the story (three if you toss in Mama Odie, which I do not because her segment is nonsensical and irrelevant), there has to be long stretches of nothing. That's a huge problem. The ride feels empty in spots, even though it really isn't, because you can't see the same character in two places at once.
• Stalls. Having your animatronics freeze up and wait for you to arrive looks incredibly tacky and bad. Maybe they move too little to notice, but Tiana and Mama Odie both have weird pauses where they should be moving more.
• Lip Sync Weirdness Tiana and Louis have really good mouth movements, but the final Mama Odie animatronic must have been broken, because the sync looked terrible.

The Good...

• Animatronics. These are next level animatronics at every turn outside of the Mama Odie problem. Tiana and Louis are stunning. Even minor animatronics are beautifully done. The costumes and theming are all beautiful.
• Ceilings. Some actual effort was made to conceal the ceilings so you're not looking up at big stretches of paint. But heeeeere's the thing... if ever there was a place that I would advocate for the use of video screens, it would be on the ceiling! That's a way to make the height of the space appear far more vast. Show the stars twinkling in the sky. SHOW RAY NOW THAT HE'S A STAR! This is a no brainer, and yet it was completely overlooked. But still... at least some effort was made.
• Queue. As I mentioned, they did a very good job trying to make standing in line be a bit more interesting than it used to be. Always appreciated.

And now? Time for some beignets.

Continuing on with my recent trip to Walt Disney World... Let's get on the gaming grid, because Shanghai Disneyland's TRON Lightcycle/Run has come to the USA, y'all! Well, technically in China it's "TRON Lightcycle Power Run," but I think it's the same ride. And, spoiler alert, I love the attraction despite the fact it's really short (I think the ride time is under two minutes!).

The story of the ride is that you are getting digitized to ride for the Blue Users to battle the evil Yellow Programs on the lightcycle grid (which will make sense to you if you've ever seen the film TRON... and if you haven't, why not?).

There's three things about the experience which make this such a good ride...

1) Most of the ride is in a building where there's screens that show you your opponents whizzing along with you as you race to block them with your lightcycle hard light trail. But after launch you exit the building for a nice loop under a canopy that lights up at night... and has hex grids which follows the cycles as they pass. It's wildly cool and you can see the canopy at night from various places in the park. A beautiful addition to Tomorrowland...

2) You're not sitting in a roller coaster car, you're sitting on a roller coaster lightcycle (kinda a futuristic motorcycle). It's not incredibly comfortable, but it's for two minutes and you just don't care because you're on a lightcycle...

3) The track is fast. 60 miles per hour fast. Launch coasters are my favorite and, while this isn't my favorite, it's nice to have another one added to the growing list of Walt Disney World coasters.

And my recap? Glad you asked!

The Bad...

• Length. This ride needed to be longer. Yeah, I know that two minutes is not really that short when it comes to launch coasters (Aerosmith Rock 'n' Roller Coaster is a minute-twenty... and my favorite, The Incredible Hulk Coaster is two minutes-fifteen), but the amount of time (or money) it takes to ride this thing demands that it be a longer experience.
• Cost. Whether you are able to snag a Virtual Queue spot for the privilege of standing in line to wait to ride it... or you spend the cash to skip the line by buying an Individual Lightning Lane (either because you don't like lines or you couldn't get in the Virtual Queue) there's a cost involved. I really hate that.
• Risk. It is entirely possible that you could go to Walt Disney World specifically to ride this coaster only to not be able to. You couldn't get a Virtual Queue. You couldn't afford the Individual Lightning Lane. You couldn't get an Individual Lightning Lane because they sold out. It could happen. The days of going to a park and just standing in line to ride do not apply to TRON: Lightcycle/Run.

The Good...

• Everything Else. But Mostly The Design. Everything about it is cool. The canopy. The lightcycles you sit on. The story. The queue. The way you "race" against your competitors. Even the pass-though lockers to store your stuff. It's all so good. Worth the effort to ride even though it doesn't last that long (THAT'S WHAT SHE SAID!).

And now? Time to watch Tron for the hundredth time.

>Continuing on with my recent trip to Walt Disney World... I usually buy something for my cats to play with when I go on vacation.

After I got back from my trip to Disney World, I had to order a replacement Orange Bird MagicBand+, so I ordered a small plush for my cats so they had a souvenir as well. Except when I got it, the thing wasn't "small" at all. Orange Bird was as tall as my cats and maybe even a little taller! So there goes my plan where they (but mostly Jake) would be dragging him all over the house as they do with their other plushie toys.

Jenny ran back upstairs the minute she saw it. Jake, on the other hand, was curious...

He gave Orange Bird a couple sniffs. Batted at it once or twice. Then walked away...

Jake and Jenny both has been ignoring Orange Bird ever since.

Oh well. I tried.

As for myself? The souvenir I bought for me was a Grinning Loth Cat collectible tiki mug from Oga's Cantina at Galaxy's Edge...

The matte grey one from Walt Disney World Florida is not as cool as the glossy shaded brown one from Disneyland California, but I still love it.

And, as much as I'd love to set it out, I worry that it would then become another souvenir for my cats once one of them knocks it off a table or something. So it gets to be put in my glassware cabinet.