I'm steeped in sadness with a broken heart today, but writing my way through it... because an all new Bullet Sunday starts... now...

Except it can't just yet.

This blog has been a blessing in so many ways, but the long-term friendships I've gotten from it have been a part of the bedrock upon which my life has been built. Bricks carved from stones that never falter, carrying the load from those which cracked and crumbled to dust. — Regardless of time. Regardless or distance. Regardless of consequence.

One of the biggest rocks in my life was Aaron, whom I first met as Jester from his JesterTunes blog. He was a key member of the "West Coast Blog Mafia" of which I was lucky enough to be a part back in the day.

We became good friends from the start.

And now he's gone.

Of all the people I know, he was the most unapologetically himself at all times, and it was something I couldn't help but admire. I was drawn to him... as most people were who met him. He was a magnet with a big musical talent and an even bigger heart. If you were lucky enough to know him, he made your life better just by being there.

Which is why I'm crushed that he isn't any more.

Except he is.

Because I have so many memories of him which will live on as long as I do. Here is a small sampling of some of my favorites, complete with a link.

At least those I can post publicly!

   
• Tattoo Me! I had wanted a tattoo for 26 years by the time I finally got my first one. Aaron was there to document it...

He was also consulted on my other tattoos. He saved me from a goof in the art I drew up for one of my favorites. This was also the tattoo where I told him that I was hesitant to get it inked because of what other people might think about my cartoony choices. He immediately shot back with "If you're going to care about what other people think, maybe you shouldn't get it then. But you should work on not giving a fuck about what other people think." A life lesson to live by. Then I got the tattoo. Mostly because I wanted it. But also to remind me that life is too short to give a fuck about what other people think.

   
• Thank You For The Music! Aaron lived and breathed music. He was a great singer, and I was lucky to see him perform from time to time...

Jester as Ace Fontana as Ace Frehley — ©2016 by Tananarive Aubert Photography

His greatest gift to me will always be the music he shared which he thought I might like. And I always liked it. He was forever sending me a new artist or song to listen to. And most of it has found its way into my playlists. Yesterday, after I was able to drive again after getting the news, the next song to play was Hey Jane by Low Millions. A group I never would have found if not for Aaron...

I couldn't possibly put into words what a musical influence Aaron was on me. For better or worse. Once he sent me a video by Scissor Sisters, a band I didn't really know. I think I had probably heard a few of their songs, but hadn't really took a dive into the band. Aaron was appalled... "You don't know who Scissor Sisters are?!? You need to fix that." And so I did. And after I made my way through Magic Hour, I texted him that I couldn't wait to hear what they do next. He shot back with "Oh. The band broke up." And I was all "WHY WOULD YOU GET ME HOOKED ON A BAND THAT BROKE UP?!? Last Winter he let me know that I could stop hating him because the band was going on tour, and it might lead to new music.

   
• 1975 Live! Despite the fact that he was living in San Francisco and I was in Central Washington, we managed to get together for a number of concerts. He'd text or call that an act was playing and I'd Venmo the cash for my ticket and fly down to see it. From Walk the Moon to Wrabel to Betty Who, it was a guaranteed fun time seeing a show with Jester. And then there's that time we saw The 1975 live on December 17th, 2015... one of my all-tie favorite bands which, naturally, Aaron discovered for me...

It ended up being one of the best concerts I've ever been to and one of the best experiences I've ever had. And it never would have happened without him.

   
• JesterRolling! Back in the heydey of the blogging trend, one of the things that bloggers did was have a radio show on BlogTalkRadio. Given his phenomenally entertaining personality, Jester's was that one show you could not miss. You tuned in because you had no idea what the heck was going to happen. And one of the best things to happen was "JesterRolling" where Aaron would find some show with no listeners, give everybody the address, then we would all jump over to participate in the show. It was absolute madness. Sometimes it would be heartwarming, where a host would be genuinely touched that all of a sudden 30 people were listening to what they had to say. Sometimes it would be bedlam, where the host was a monumental asshole spouting hate or otherwise being awful. Something Jester never tolerated in real life... and was not afraid to confront on the internet. It was glorious.

I was a guest or caller on the show several times. I had taken one of those stupid internet quizzes where you answer questions and it tells you how gay you are. Turns out I'm 20% gay. Which means I could promote my appearance on the show in interesting ways. Like saying "When you combine my 20% gay fierceness with Jester's 100% gay fierceness, that's 120% gay fierceness all in one radio show, which just might exceed the BlogTalk Radio standards for overall gay fierceness!"

A part of me is sad that BlogTalkRadio shut down in January. It would be fun to listen to some of those old shows again. And yet... a part of me is probably glad that it has shut down, because oh boy.

   
• "Most guys would be pretty upset if another guy grabbed their ass. I'm just glad to know I have options!" Even though I was only 20% gay and probably not qualified to intrude on those spaces... having gay friends means I end up in a lot of gay places. But only with Aaron did it end up being educational. There's few things Jester loved more than regaling me with the more, ahem, "interesting" aspects of gay life and gay culture. Probably to get my reaction, which was usually a mixture of shock and awe. Even though the absolute last thing anybody should be when hanging out with him is shocked. Once we went to a good bye party for a mutual blogging friend at a gay bar in The Castro called "Hi Tops" (home of cold pitchers and hot catchers!). We were talking at the bar while waiting on our drinks when I suddenly said "Oh!" mid-sentence because one of the waiters grabbed my ass as he rounded the end of the bar. Jester thought this was hilarious, and reminded me of it. Often. Once he took me to a gay bar down the street from a restaurant where we were early for our reservation. After we ordered, he told the waiter "Feel free to grab his ass when you come back. He's straight, but he likes it." He was forever doing things like that. One of the times we met up in Vegas, we were in a shopping plaza on an escalator where he started rubbing my back and saying loudly all the things he wanted to do to me when we got back to the hotel room. I don't know if he was trying to embarrass me or shock the people around us. It could have been both. It was probably both. Oh come on, this is Jester we're talking about... it was definitely both.

   
• If you come to San Francisco! I couldn't count the number of times I ended up hanging with Aaron in The City By The Bay. I often had work there, and Aaron lived in nearby Oakland. Most times, it was dinner or drinks (more likely, both) but we also did a lot of other things there too. Like visit The Walt Disney Family Museum...

Or driving north to Marin so we could visit Point Reyes and pick out a pumpkin for his Halloween decorating...

Most of the time, we would meet up in San Francisco. But we actually met in a lot of places. We met in Las Vegas for Certified Princess Cher & her husband Nis's second wedding...

We met in San Diego for the DaveDiego meet-up...

Then in San Diego again for his 40th birthday party...

And we even met in Seattle for a concert once.

   
• i/o! The last time I saw Jester in person was when he flew to Seattle with his partner Henry and his brother Seth to take me to the Peter Gabriel i/o tour two years ago...

I would chat with Aaron after that night, of course. But I didn't know it would be the last time I'd see him. If I did, I would have done more than just hug him goodbye. I would have told him how much he has meant to me all these many years. I would have thanked him for the multitude of memories he's responsible for which have brought such joy to my life. I would have told him that I loved him and my life would be poorer if he weren't in it. I would have said so many things that you can only say to somebody who really means something to you.

Instead I just have to hope that he knew what he meant to me.

Aaron was loved by so many people. And being his friend put you in a far from an exclusive club because he has so many of them. But he had a way of making you feel like you were his only friend on this earth. I will miss that about him. I will miss my friend more than I can say.

I put this post in a Bullet Sunday entry because I met Aaron through blogging and it seemed the most Blogography way to talk about him. The problem being that there's just so much I could say that these bullets could have gone on for pages and pages. But eventually the bullet points have to end, just like they always do.

Eventually, you have to say goodbye, even though you really don't want to.

Today I was driving back home from my holiday across the mountains when I got a phone call that was a punch in the gut so unexpected that I had to pull off the road because driving a car became a foreign concept in my head.

And then, after ten minutes to mostly get my head on straight, I was off again...

Because this is the only major East-West route left across the state (flooding destroyed the other one) and it snowed last night, there was major congestion in places... which meant that a 2-1/2 hour trip took 3-1/2 hours to complete.

But at the end when I finally walked through the door to my home, the trip was worth it because it wasn't just Jake waiting for me... both Jake AND Jenny were waiting for me. Which is strange, because Jenny usually prefers to make sure it's safe before venturing downstairs when anybody walks in the house. Including me.

It was a repeat of when I got back from Florida...

...except this time I really needed it.

When I was a kid, it felt that the entire year was a build-up to Christmas and, once it was over, there was a depression that crept in because it was all downhill from there.

Until the next Christmas.

In a lot of ways, it's still like that. Not because Christmas means the same thing to me as it did way, way back then, but because that's life in these United States. The entire country is on a collision course with Christmas, and you're in for the ride whether you want to be or not. It's everywhere.

And then, just like that, it's gone.

Remnants remain, of course. The Christmas trees are still up everywhere. Stores have all their Christmas junk on sale. Christmas decorations won't be coming down until the New Year. Some people are saying things like "I hope you had a Merry Christmas!" And people are posting their Christmas photos. Etc. Etc. Etc.

But it's nothing like it was just two days prior.

Two weeks prior.

Even nearly two months prior, when the madness begins the day after Halloween. If you're lucky. I saw a Christmas section going up in a store the week before Christmas.

It's all a little sad.

Something I am definitely not sad about is that I have the day off work. Turns out Christmas has benefits even for the heathens amongst us.

And so it's Christmas.

Which, to me, is pretty much a day off with friends... which is perfect.

Despite the fact that it's not my holiday, I do very much enjoy this time of year. I like the memories of it and the festivity of it all. And here's the three things outside my bubble that I saw and liked best of all...

First of all, there's these amazing Krispy Kreme donuts that are Peanuts-themed and beautifully presented. I wish so badly I had a shop near me, because I would buy a box in a hot second...

ZOMG! JUST LOOK AT SNOOPY HERE!!! HE'S PERFECT!

Krispy Kreme really knows how to do these promos. Their Dolly Parton box was flawless too.

Next up is this promo piece that was for the New Heights podcast with Travis and Jason Kelce...

Now, if you don't follow their podcast, here you go...

Genius. I'm betting they'd sell thousands of those sweaters if they'd release them!

And lastly, here's a holiday advert for grocery store chain Intermarché created by Romance Agency. It's in French, but you don't have to understand French to understand the message...

A Happy Christmas to all who celebrate.

Yesterday I headed over the mountains which, depressingly, was an easy drive. This time of year, the road should have an unfathomably deep layer of snow off the side.

Six feet. Eight feet. Maybe even more. But it was just covering the barriers, even at the very top of the pass...

Here I am coming down the other side of the mountain, and you can see that the barrier is still visible...

So right now we're having major flooding and rain in the valley, which is a bad enough sign because it means that it's too warm to snow. And now seeing this in the mountains has me seriously worried we're in for drought this coming Summer.

I mean, I guess I'm grateful that it was an easy drive.

But not really.

Christmas is not my holiday, but I live in the USA so it might as well be.

And, hey, I'm not complaining. The country pretty much shuts down from December 24th through January 2nd, which means I can catch up with my work without distraction! There's so much needed to be done to close out the year that I'm always grateful to have the extra time to get ahead of it.

And this year, since I had a vacation earlier in the month, I'll also appreciate having some time to CLEAN MY FILTHY HOUSE. Seriously, I never realize how much of a mess my cats make on a daily basis until I'm not here to keep on top of it. They are so messy. Cat fur... everywhere. Kitty litter... everywhere. Cat toys... everywhere. And an occasional hairball or scarf-and-barf deposit. It ain't at all pretty after more than 3 or 4 days.

I'm coming up on 21 days, and I've barely had time to touch the place.

And now snow is supposed to be coming in the next few days, which means I'll be cleaning up outside my home as well.

'Tis the season.

I believe in supporting the artists whose media I consume, so I buy the media I want to own.

For the longest time this meant VHS Tape, then LaserDisc, then DVD, then Blu-Ray, then Digital. I liked digital because I didn't have to make space for physical media in my home, and it seemed the ideal solution for being able to access the stuff I buy from wherever I'm at. Except it didn't end up working that way. Unlike when you buy a movie on DVD, when you purchase via Digital, you aren't purchasing the media. Instead you are purchasing a license to view that media... and it's a license which the studio or licensee can terminate at any time. And when a TV show I bought was removed by the studio, I swore I would never buy digital again and went back to physical media.

Physical media that I ultimately rip into a digital format as a personal backup (because physical media can deteriorate and become unusable). But all that digital media has to be stored somewhere, and that's where Network Attached Storage (NAS) comes in. This is a box of hard drives that hooks up to your network and can serve your files to wherever you allow it. Meaning that I can access my purchased media wherever I want.

When I went shopping for a NAS years ago, all I wanted was Synology hardware. But I couldn't afford it, so I went with QNAP which was supposed to be the next best thing. It was not. Multiple problems culminated with a ransomware attack that would have lost all my files if not for the fact that I maintain a backup. Between this horrific bullshit and the fact that QNAP apps are always numerous versions behind in their app store and I was done with QNAP, but still stuck with it because I couldn't afford to replace the thing. Instead I turned off all outside access, which was a bummer because I could no longer access my media away from home.

Fast-forward to May 2025 and Synology made a move towards requiring proprietary drives, something to which I said "Oh fuck no!" and scratched them off my list of NAS manufacturers I wanted to deal with. After the fiasco with WD, I buy Seagate IronWolf Pro drives. Period.

Fast-forward again to Black Friday 2025, and I ended up buying a replacement NAS from UGREEN because my QNAP NAS has gotten old with its Celeron J1900 processor, and the 8.5× to 10.5× speed jump of the Pentium Gold 8505 processor in the 4-Bay UGREEN 4800+ was too good to pass up. Even if I had to put it on a credit card to pay the $550.00 price tag.

UGREEN, which is a highly reviewed relatively new player in the NAS market, wasn't originally on my list of options. I don't have anything against a device made in China (because isn't everything?), but knowing that their government might have built a back-door into the system which may compromise my cat photos, and that was a deal-breaker.

But then I found out you can replace the OS with TrueNAS Open Source, if needed, and was like... alrighty then. Not that it much matters, because I was going to firewall it off completely, remove UGREENlink, and go with VPN-only access.

But Anyway...

I've been slowly transferring all my media to the new NAS and have been quite happy with it. The UGREEN model is freakishly faster compared to the old QNAP model I had. Usually, NAS manufacturers put old, slow CPUs in their boxes because you don't need really fast chips to perform file serving tasks. Except serving files is not all that a NAS does. In my case, the NAS also has to run apps to serve media for my laptop and my television (which I do with an app called Plex)... along with a bunch of other apps which do various tasks with my data. And having a fast CPU for those tasks is important.

One of those apps is TailScale, a secure connectivity app which allows me access to my data without having to go through QNAP or UGREEN. Kinda like a private VPN. Thus eliminating my distrust of major companies... no matter where they're located.

Overall I'm very happy with the UGREEN 4800+ NAS. If I have a gripe it's that they don't have many app packages available. For example Plex can't simply be downloaded, installed, and set-up from within the UGREEN app repository. It don't exist. Instead you have to download an abstraction layer called Docker which has all kinds of apps (including Plex and TailScale) to be run and set up as containers that are interpreted for UGREEN. It's nowhere near as easy to go this route than to have a native app, but it does work if you're willing to put in a little research, time, and effort. It took me a couple days to get Plex working correctly because the various "instruction" videos were contradictory and often glazed past critical information, but it's running just fine now.

The quality of the hardware is also very good. The housing is an aluminum alloy instead of the janky plastic housing on my QNAP, for example. I also like the trays for the hard drives, which are tool-free fr 3.5" drives. There are a variety of ports... including SD card slot, USB-C, and USB-A on the front... and HDMI, 3 USB-A, plus 2.5Gb and 10Gb ethernet ports. As if that wasn't enough, the unit arrives with upgrade tools to install an SSD cache and more memory, two CAT-7 ethernet cables, and a power adapter. Maximum capacity is a whopping 136TB over four drives (I have four 16TB drives in a RAID 6 configuration which gives me 29TB of usable space, because I like redundancy for safety).

If I have an outright complaint to offer, it has nothing to do with UGREEN. Instead it's with Plex. This is by far my favorite media serving platform (I bought a lifetime pass within a month of installing it), but it's not without its faults. For one thing, it wants to build movie "collections" even if you tell it not to by setting it to "disabled." And most all of these collections are fucking useless and stupid, so I end up deleting them all. Which takes a crazy amount of time because there are so many. But even worse is the fact that I have found no easy way of transferring all my title adjustments and poster art from my old install for all the titles I have. Which means I'm going to have to start all over again from scratch. That's hours and hours of work. Why there isn't just a folder I can copy over I have no idea. There's a "config" folder, but what I'm looking for isn't there. I guess. Because if there is, I'm not finding it. You'd think that this would be a no-brainer.

I just wish I had the free time to get my latest media purchases ripped so I could add them to my new NAS. I've been wanting to re-watch Superman, and this would be a great excuse to do that.

Christmas is coming, the goose is getting fat. Pleased do put a penny in the old man's hat. And an entry in his web browser... because an all new Bullet Sunday starts... now...

   
• Joining! I am utterly ensnared by PLUR1BUS. It's slow... but deliberate... you just know that Vince Gilligan is building things up for a payoff, because otherwise there wouldn't be a point to the show? But what form that takes for the first season when we have more seasons to go? No idea...

There's one episode left until the long wait for Season 02.

   
• Full Disclosure! I can't remember the last time I was even remotely excited for a Steven Spielberg film. I am a bit excited for this...

The film looks suitably disturbing, which is about the only way the subject like this could be interesting.

   
• Ignorance! “I don’t even know how to pronounce it, so it must be bad... and I’m too big of a dumbshit to do a Google search before cluttering social media with my ignorant bullshit, so here you go...”

We are so fucked. All the vanquished diseases are coming back, and these idiots are intent on keeping it that way.

   
• Blunder Woman! The first Wonder Woman movie was a revelation. It's one of my favorite super-hero films ever made, and definitely one of the best DC movies they've ever made. The scene where she steps out of the trench brought tears to my eyes, because it was that moment Diana is Wonder Woman. In a way we haven't seen since Lynda Carter's flawless take on the character decades ago. But the sequel, Wonder Woman 1984, was a steaming pile of crap. I was mortified by it. There was no single area where it didn't fail. I couldn't believe that Patty Jenkins would release this. And this video explains why...

I am still furious that the franchise was destroyed by this one film. I can only hope and pray that James Gunn will be sure we get a Wonder Woman film that's deserving of the character's legacy.

   
• B- B- B- Buck! I was sad to learn that Gil Gerard died this past week. Though, to be honest, I don't remember much about his work. The only show I can even think of him appearing is Buck Rogers in the 25th Century, which I only watched because Erin Gray's "Col. Wilma Deering" and Pamela Hensley's "Princess Ardala"...

The writing on the show was pretty bad, something I was able to recognize despite the fact that I was watching it at 13 years old. Though to be fair, the writers were likely under massive constraints to reign in the budget. But I do remember that Gerard dug into the corny, campy scripts with gusto, which meant that it was at least entertaining. And for that he'll be remembered.

   
• We're All Paying for AI! There it is.

I have found shockingly little use for AI, which is surprising, because I thought it would be changing everything for me. And maybe one day it will. But right now it's just so... bad.

   
• UnShock! Shocking. — I lie. This may be the least shocking story I've read in recent days...

Turns out there didn't need to ever be some kind of "deep state" conspiracy. It's all being done right out in the open.

   
And now I'm decorating the Christmas tree! Just kidding. My cats would murder it.

There is no "worst day" for me after my mom died. That was it. That was the one I get.

Which is why one of the books I'm working on is currently titled Travels with My Mother (and the five worst days of my life). It's a collection of travel stories from when I was visiting places around the world with her interspersed with me recounting the five worst days of my life. It's been fun to write... but difficult too, because it just makes me realize all over again how much I've lost with each new page.

But anyway...

Yesterday was my mom's birthday. She would have been 81 years old.

It's also the day my car tabs are due. Which is one of those unhappy coincidences that I never thought about when I had to buy a new car last December.

So I went to the bookkeeping office where I pay for the tabs, then drove home.

The road to which goes right by the cemetery where my mom is buried. Which is another one of those unhappy coincidences that I never thought about when I picked the easiest route to my home.

But anyway...

Today is Caturday, which only exists because of the two cats I got to keep my mom company and help distract her from being confused all the time. A job Jake and Jenny did exceptionally well...

Yes. I just shared this three Caturdays ago, but I didn't know it would be needed again so soon.

   
And so... happy birthday mom, one day late.

As I've mentioned an insufferable number of times, I watch more YouTube than any other media source. It's playing 90% of the time on my television while I'm working, and it runs the gamut when it comes to topics.

Here's the previous five videos which are in my watch history for you to enjoy when you can't find anything good on TV.

First is this trailer for an upcoming movie about... SHEEP DETECTIVES?!?...

A 30 second video where The Good Liars ask a very good question...

Sigourney Weaver breaks down some of her most famous roles...

Thomas Flight picked his favorite films of 2025...

And, lastly, this glorious two hour video takedown of a notorious scammer and fraudster...

You're welcome!