UPDATE! If you have eclipse glasses you will be throwing away, donate them instead! This is so great.

The first eclipse I remember viewing was the Great Eclipse of February 1979. We were right on the edge of the "Totality Zone," which means that everybody in the region was eclipse-crazy. "We don't even have to travel to have the best seat in the house!" Except... Central Washington in February (especially back then) is usually overcast skies, so nothing (especially the "best seats in the house") was guaranteed.

But then the Big Day arrived and, miracle or miracles, the skies were not terrible. It was a school day, which meant that our science teacher showed us how to view the event with a piece of paper with a hole in it casting the shadow of the sun onto another piece of paper. AKA the shittiest way to view an eclipse. You'd think for this monumental event, the Washington State Department of Education would have sprang to give us all safety glasses, but it was what it was. We all went outside with our papers, and I remember a lot of it very well despite my being 12 years old (almost 13) at the time. But mostly I remember how thrilled I was to get out of science class.

The next eclipse was only 92% where I lived back in 2017, but I had great equipment to view it and take photos, which made it a heck of a lot more memorable than looking at a shadow on a piece of paper...

Plus... my cats had fun because I was staying home with them, so there's that.

The eclipse today wasn't that eventful... we were told it would be just a small chunk out of the bottom. I brought my glasses to work to have a look since the skies weren't too terrible, but then forgot. Oh well.

INTERESTING TO NOTE: My last kidney stone was in 2017. The date of the last eclipse here was 2017. — OBVIOUSLY NASA IS CAUSING KIDNEY STONES WITH THEIR WOKE "ECLIPSES," WHICH WE ALL KNOW IS REALLY JUST THEM REPAIRING HOLES IN THE FIRMAMENT DOME! I DEMAND THAT MARJORIE TAYLOR GREENE USE HER FULL POWER IN CONGRESS TO INVESTIGATE IMMEDIATELY!

IN OTHER ECLIPSE NEWS: No wonder people thought that The Rapture was going to be today. It happened on Rex Manning Day! (happy Rex Manning Day to all who celebrate)...

I can't celebrate Rex Manning Day without looking up this awesome commercial that Ryan Reynolds gave us last year...

I will spend tonight watching Empire Records for the hundredth time, of course. Such a classic.

IN OTHER, OTHER ECLIPSE NEWS: So how about that Rapture? A ridiculous number of people were coming out of the woodwork claiming that the pending eclipse was clearly a sign that the End of Days was here because they were "activating" the CERN Super Hadron Collider to open a portal and invite the devil to invade so his demons could collapse society and power off the grid (or whatever dippy shit they came up with). Did God change His mind? Shouldn't all these false prophets be getting stoned to death? I'm not holding my breath that the same people posting this shit to social media are going to recant and say they were wrong. Oh hell no. They're already off to the races on whatever other stupid crap they can dream up. Like blaming President Biden for the high cost of shit while corporations are reporting record high profits. Almost as if the corporations are using inflation as an excuse to raise their prices to all-time highs so they can make billions upon billions of extra dollars without getting blamed for it (thus driving inflation even higher). Imagine that! Nope. BIDEN DID IT! And it's like, come on. The Biden Administration has done plenty of actual fucked up shit without having to push stuff like this. But, it's an election year, and high prices are an easy campaign talking point for people to understand, so here we are.

IN OTHER, OTHER RELIGIOUS NEWS: Today The Vatican took time away from their busy schedule of passing around photos of altar boys to declare that surrogacy and gender-affirming care are on par with euthanasia and abortion when it comes to being an affront to human life and a violation of God's Divine Plan...

First of all... if God didn't want surrogacy to produce life, he wouldn't allow it to be possible. Period. My theory is that Catholic priests just find confessional stories about surrogacy to be boring, and would rather hear about a parishioner confessing to getting raw-dogged by a football team because it gives them something fun to beat off to (because they're not having sex... right? RIGHT?!?). Otherwise, why are people who can't have children weighing in on how other people have children? It's insane. You'd think that they'd love the idea of the new Catholics this might create. That's just sound financial sense when it comes to the number of donations on the plate.

Second of all... as a former Catholic, I feel that I'm completely within my right to say that I don't give one single solitary fuck as to what these assholes think is "dignified" about "life." They continue to protect their priests who routinely abuse and sexually assault children. They continue to exploit people in ways that are in direct contradiction to the Bible. They are a monstrous corporation masquerading as a church. Until they clean their own fucking house, they have absolutely ZERO authority to even have an OPINION about what people do with their lives (especially when it comes to gender-affirming care, which can literally saves lives... lives that they don't give a fuck about in the first place, mind you). And even if they did clean house, they can still fuck off with their bullshit, because unless somebody CHOOSES to turn to them for guidance, their OPINION is worth less than jack-shit. Keep your idiotic bullshit within the walls of your fucking child indoctrination camps for the benefit of sexual predators, AKA "Catholic Churches."

I realize that my time as a youngster spent with the Catholic Church was me wearing rose-tinted glasses... but it still pains me to be gunning for them like this because, for better or worse, it was an important part of my life. Particularly when it comes to my grandmother. In all honesty, I don't think the majority of Catholics approve of how The Church deals with many things, but they need their Faith in their lives, so they continue to look past all the heinous shit out of self-preservation. And honestly? I don't blame them. This world is a cesspool, so whatever you need to get through the day is what you need to get through the day. I just wish that more Catholics would hold The Church accountable so that it wouldn't get to keep abusing people and ruining lives without consequences.

Now... I'm off to make dinner and get ready to Say no More, Mon Amour with Rex Manning!

I should have baked cupcakes.

It's the time for April... fools?

Every once in a while I fall down a flat earth rabbit hole, knowing full well that I'll be saying "What the fuck?" at least a hundred times.

And this time around it all started because somebody commented "Nobody believes the earth is flat. You're just being trolled." and I'm like "Holy shit! Somebody actually believes that flat earthers don't exist?!? Obviously they don't get out enough, because flerfers are everywhere, and invest huge amounts of time defending their beliefs with "irrefutable proof" (that's neither irrefutable nor proof).

The insanity surrounding the impending eclipse just makes it all the more mind-blowing. Eclipses occurr where and when scientists say they do because of a model which involves a globe earth. They can literally show you how the calculations work so you can see how they arrive to their conclusions. And yet... people will look at all that and be "Nah, it's flat."

Even when they fail to prove it themselves. As with my favorite flat earth video of all time, which is a whopping one minute and seven seconds long...

Uh huh.

Meanwhile there are people saying that the National Guard being deployed for the eclipse is proof positive of the government knowing it's the End of Days... when, in fact, it's just because the expected influx of people to the totality zone (along with people trying to watch the eclipse while driving) makes for a potentially dangerous situation that local resources simply cannot handle.

And of course CERN has decided to fire up the Large Hadron Collider on the same day of the eclipse to drive the tin-foil hat brigade off the rails.

Now THAT'S trolling. Expert level.

Can't he just sell Mar-A-Lago and be fine with the fines? He says it's worth $739 million!

Of course the property was valued at more like $75 million in court documents, so he might have to sell some other stuff too... but he's got the assets to post that bond. Not a problem at all. He's apparently worth billions of dollars, so it really shouldn't be any problem at all, even if all his money is tied up in "assets and investments." Sell your stuff. That's what everybody else has to do. It's what I've done when I needed money. Granted, it wasn't $464 million, but I don't have a bunch of pricey properties available to me, so...

In other news... Jordan laughing at his own jokes is always a classic...

One more sleep until Hump Day.

Don't even worry about the fact that the world is going to hell in a hand basket. Don't give it another thought. There's no need... because an all new Bullet Sunday starts... now...

   
• Biggie! This video shows the largest city on earth throughout history, and it's absolutely mind-blowing...

Fascinating how the USA doesn't even register until the end.

   
• Good on NASA! In a day and age when young Black men are getting told left and right that they have to cut off their locs or they can't be in school or can't be in sports... Tyrone Jacobs released his NASA headshot...

If NASA doesn't have a problem with natural hair, why the fuck do schools think they have a right to say a damn thing? Newsflash: THEY DON'T. Same goes for tattoos. Same goes for any outward appearance which doesn't keep you from doing the job.

   
• Queer Comedy! Hannah Gadsby is headlining a gender-queer Netflix Special and I finally got around to watching it. I was expecting her to not touch on the controversy she had with Netflix because, well, how can you use your platform to criticize your platform? But she just went for it. Nothing held back. And Netflix is obviously airing it, so good on Hannah and good on Netflix, I guess...

It's not a home-run, but a lot of the jokes are very funny. I enjoyed it.

   
• More Clavell! The new Shōgun series is magical to me. I love that the Japanese is subtitled and not dubbed. The language is taking me back. And bless you, Hulu, for putting some money into this. It looks incredible. Sure they wander from the book a bit, but I think that their choices are interesting ones. And I love the cast...

If only we'd get a 12-part adaptation of Noble House next. Not a gutted version, but complete with the Cold War elements and fascinating look at Hong Kong through its people.

   
• Just Poor! Am I being punked? I do not in any way understand the acclaim for Poor Things. I fucking hated this movie despite loving the other films from most everybody in it. Yes, it’s gorgeous, the imaginative sets are genius, and the cinematography is incredible (the use of different lenses throughout is just =chef’s kiss=)... but the story is a big departure from the book. And absolutely not in a good way...

The book is a wonderfully layered story of how men view women, and it uses the concept of “unreliable narrator” so that you truly don’t know who or what to believe. And there are multiple conflicting “truths” that are tainted by things like misogyny, perspectives, and even the wishful thinking of different characters. But the movie? Bella is a child’s brain in an adult body as a matter of fact, which makes the entire thing a fucking nightmare. It’s child porn with a loophole. And it lacks the subtlety and complexity that made the book so interesting. In my view, Bella loses a lot of her agency in the movie. Her experience and story is viewed entirely through the lens of men she encounters, even as she is rapidly maturing and coming to understand how the world works for a woman. Movie Bella really doesn’t face adversity to truly understand anything either. It’s all observational, and nothing feels earned as she wanders from place to place. And, good Lord, the music is a horrific assault that made me want to turn on subtitles and view it on mute. Who the fuck wants to listen to this? So many times I am able to dislike popular movies for myself, but appreciate that they exist for others. But this time? Hell no. I regret the precious time I wasted watching this mess. It gutted a wonderfully interesting book and turned it into soft core porn for the male gaze which is contrary to what I took away from the source material.

   
• Whistle Broken. John Barnett did not shoot himself? Or maybe he did. Regardless, I am putting the 100% entire complete blame on Boeing. The guy dedicated 32 years of his life to this company but had a conscience. So when management decided to ignore his concerns about declining quality and falsify data on serious issues with manufacturing, he reported the cover-up as a "whistleblower." And now he's dead. Right in the middle of the lawsuit against his former employer. Again, this guy devoted 32 YEARS of his life to this company. They then set out to absolutely destroy what life he had left because he wanted passengers to be safe. They finally succeeded. Regardless of whether he ended it himself or somebody did it to him.

   
• Cancel, Please! Why don't streaming services allow you to block shows and movies? Take HBO Max, for example. I never want to watch Bill Maher. Ever. Never ever. I don't care who he has on. I'd rather light my pubes on fire and jump into a barrel of gasoline than watch that moronic self-righteous piece of shit asshole for even two minutes. But every time I start HBO Max, there he is. There's no way to block the dipshit. No way to get him off my TV. And no amount of ignoring him will get HBO to get the fucking message. On Facebook I can block somebody I don't want any contact with. But with HBO, there's no options at all. Can't even give him a thumbs-down so the algorithm will stop inundating you with his bullshit. It's nearly enough for me to cancel HBO, because having to look at Maher's smug face is tantamount to torture.

   
Hope the rest of your Sunday is a good one.

The annual rebuttal to the State of the Union address is a thankless job which never goes well on either side of the aisle. And yet, for reasons which escape me, politicians are always lining up to take on the task. I honestly don't see an up-side of any kind for doing so. Best case scenario is that you perform so well speaking out against the president that you impress people enough to further your political career.

But that would take somebody who's truly crafty, clever, and smart... with charisma to match.

Katie Britt has none of those things.

But boy did she ever think she did. Which just goes to show that people are never lacking the ability to overestimate their smarts. She's about as smart as a stick of butter, and she put that on full display for everybody to see (much like I put mine on full display with this blog!).

She also was willing to show what a lying piece of shit she is, but that's neither here nor there given how politicians don't seem to be penalized for lying.

Absolutely everybody who saw her heinously embarrassing performance of the rebuttal was just waiting for her to be the subject of Saturday Night Live's cold open and, well, SNL wasn't about to pass that up (as I noted on Bullet Sunday). Here it is again in case you're one of the three people who hasn't yet seen it...

And now Katie Britt is doubling down on her stupid shit as if her speech was perfect, and is blaming Democrat lies (instead of her own?) for the perceived problems with all the stupid shit she said. Which is baffling. President Biden has done plenty of things that are worthy of scrutiny... so why make shit up? Why over-dramatize it when it speaks for itself? Just point out where the problems are, explain why you thnk they're bad, offer up real solutions, and tell people why you're a better alternative.

It seems as if doing that is a no-brainer, but... well...

Remember how I said that best case scenario is that you perform so well speaking out against the president that you impress people enough to further your political career? Worst case scenario is that you perform so badly that your political career is over.

If there's any justice in the world, that's exactly what we have here.

To say that Akira Toriyama is influential in the pantheon of manga creators is a massive understatement. The guy is best-known for having created Dragon Ball, but he had other works which were worthy of praise.

One of the most famous stories about this absolute legend is that he used the same pen to draw every manga he ever created, and the reason he stopped drawing was because he lost his favorite pen holder, which he had been using since he was a teen. I don't know if it's true or not, but boy is that a good story...

Whenever another of my manga and anime heroes passes, I always look back on those we've already lost. Satoshi Kon. Fujio Fujiko. Isao Takahata. Satoshi Iwataki. Yoshito Usui. Kentaro Miura. Kazuki Takahashi. Among others.

So much talent gone from this earth.

And yet their works remain...

Dragon Ball isn't going anywhere.

Rest in Peace, sir.

Total TikTok ban is imminent? - So... it's okay for US corporations and our government to give our private information to China without our consent... but we can't choose whether or not we want to watch TikTok and potentially give our viewing habits and location directly to China? It's okay for US corporations and our government to unload their bullshit propaganda onto social media users, even when it suits Chinese interests... but if China uses TikTok to do it directly, it's a problem?

Got it.

So long as the Chinese monitoring data and propaganda is collected for them by American companies, it's great. But collected directly by China is bad.

God Bless America.

I find it laughable that Congress thinks they're doing something here. They're fucking us on a daily basis while inventing some scenario so they can say they're keeping us from being fucked. Sounds about right. BECAUSE FREEDUMB!

Telling you right now, if Patty Murray, Maria Cantwell, and Dr. Kim Schrier support this bullshit... but will still allow Facebook, Instagram, Threads, Twitter, and the rest to exist (ALL OF WHOM HAVE SHIPPED OUR INFORMATION TO CHINA)... They will never get another vote from me.

Just kidding. I didn't vote for Murray and Cantwell last time... they're shills for Big Pharma who voted against drug-importation from Canada out of "safety concerns." Because, you know, you can't turn on the fucking television without hearing how prescription drugs have killed another million people in The Great White North. And, as if that wasn't enough, they have the fucking gall to talk about people not being able to afford life-saving drugs like they weren't responsible for taking money from pharmaceutical companies to protect their profits.

I fucking DESPISE Patty Murray and Maria Cantwell. And yet every time I bring up their hipocrisy, everybody tells me about all the "good" things they do. And I'm like REALLY?!? Washington is the fucking bluest state in the entire country. Anybody replacing them would be Democrats who would do all the "good things" they do... plus be there for the other votes we need our Senators to weigh in on. So vote them the fuck out of office.

Banning TikTok is just another fucking smokescreen for all the heinous shit that's actually going on in politics. But you can't blame politicians for exploiting it because their voters keep believing the shit they shovel.

So more (political) power to them, I guess.

There's no lack in irony that China bans all foreign social media platforms. But here in the good ol' USA, we don't do that because we believe in freedom.

At least we did.

I am not a big football fan. I rarely watch it. I don't care about it. My spectator sports are hockey (Blackhawks) and baseball (Red Sox) and those are the only sports I bother to keep up with. I do like an occasional basketball game because, like hockey, it's fast-moving and can be exciting to watch if you've got two great teams that are well-matched.

That being said...

I became a fan of the Kelce brothers before it was cool (e.g. before Travis started dating Taylor Swift), and so while I don't keep up with football, I definitely keep up with them. Their podcast is excellent, especially when they talk about life outside of football. And their appearances everywhere are always entertaining (Travis Kelce's appearance on Saturday Night Live is one of the best episodes ever).

But anyway...

Jason Kelce retired. Have a tissue ready...

Football is a brutal sport which takes a heavy physical toll. I can't believe that he managed to power through for this long. Regardless, wishing him all the best. I really hope that the podcast continues, because it's filled with so many great moments. And you learn stuff about stuff!

Congrats. You've left quite a legacy.

Growing up in Washington State, you can't help but be very aware of Boeing. It was founded in Seattle just over 100 years ago, and it's tough to grow up here and not know somebody who was touched by the company in some way.

Well, at least until 2001, when Boeing moved its HQ to Chicago (and then subsequently moved to Arlington last year). Since that time, this once-great titan of industry has had its share of problems.

And it turns out that they were bigger problems than I could have guessed, for all the reasons that I should have expected...

Sad. Horrifying. And oh so predictable.

Who I feel bad for are the many Boeing workers whose jobs are in jeopardy because of decisions that were entirely outside of their control... and airlines like Alaska Air who trusted Boeing to put out a quality product that's safe and reliable.

Not to mention all the passengers and crew whose lives are put into danger because Boeing management cares more about making a buck than human lives.

Wah! My weekend is already half over and I'm not ready for it to be Sunday! But Sunday it must be... because an all new Bullet Sunday starts... now...

   
• Goonies Never Die! I watched this video reflecting on the career of Josh Brolin solely in the hopes that he would talk about Men In Black 3. That movie is so incredibly underrated. It's an amazing film. And a large part of that is Josh Brolin doing a Tommy Lee Jones impression... perfectly... for most of the runtime. And obviously GQ knew that's the thing everybody wanted to hear, so they saved it for last...

I sure wish that we could have heard more about his experience working on that movie.

   
• Otin! Oh man. The new Disney+ series, Iwájú, is Afrofuturism done very well... but it's so much more than that because there's like a lot going on. And it's very much steeped in Nigerian culture, which is to say that it's something wonderfully different than the same old shit we usually get. Bravo to Disney for giving us something fresh and new for a change. And for using amazing voice actors who breath life into these characters...

The frickin' FOOD in this show is unreal. They put a lot of focus on it as a part of entrenching you into Nigerian culture. And, I tell you what, the emotion they pack into these 20 minute episodes is substantial. Tola is the main character of the show... but it's her best friend Kole who will break your heart. Dang they put a lot of hardship on this poor kid. The villain in this series is a very, very bad man! AND GOOD LORD THIS SHOW IS BEAUTIFUL. They use color to illustrate the class divide in this future Nigeria, and it's very, very hard not to see it because it's the visual language they paint with. And, as if all that wasn't enough, the sound design is equally wonderful. Great surround effects to envelope you in the environment. If you have Disney+, it's very much worth checking out. The episodes are short, so it's a quick watch.

   
• Ramona! Ramona Fradon is a legendary artist whose gorgeous illustration style has been seen on a vast number of comic book characters. I think I first saw her work on Aquaman reprints or the Super Friends comic. But over the years the thing I most remember her for is the "special event" Wonder Woman stories they'd get her to draw. She had a more "cartoony old-style" that wasn't my favorite for the comics I was into, but that didn't mean I couldn't appreciate it from an artistic standpoint. Far from it, her minimalist style is beautiful because she could get some very expressive line-work that stood very well on its own. I remember reading about her retirement (which was January 5th) and she passed four weeks later on February 24th at the age of 97. Her final work was a trio of covers for Women's History Month...

Though one of her more brilliant works was a private commission piece that she did a few years ago...

Rest In Peace. You were a trailblazer and true artist from the start.

   
• Help Me, Todd! Okay... let's do the math. Paramount+ wants $60 a year to subscribe with ads. Without ads is $120 a year. BECAUSE IT COMES WITH SHOWTIME, WHICH I DO NOT WANT! No option to get CBS shows without ads and without Showtime. I would pay $90 to get a year of ad-free, but Paramount is a joke of a company who wants me to subsidize their Showtime programs which I have no interest in watching. And so... do I pay $60 so I can watch So Help Me Todd with ads... or do I just subscribe to the show on iTunes for $30 without ads and I can watch it as much as I want? Well, because I don't believe in paying for stuff I don't want AND I detest ads, I'll just buy the show on iTunes. It is, after all, my favorite network show on television...

It's not like CBS has any other shows I can't live without. I'll just watch episodes of NCIS Hawaii once Paramount runs out of money from trying to force crap on people they don't want and they're forced to sell episodes of the show to Netflix because the person in charge of the company is a fucking moron. Can't wait for the spin from the Paramount PR office when profits drop to record lows and they have to convince shareholders that the people running the company aren't fucking idiots who just lost $60 from me. Of course, this is the network who canceled Magnum P.I., so it's not like I expect rational thought to come out of their leadership. But hey, maybe they'll renew So Help Me Todd and get another $30 out of me next year? Stranger things have happened!

   
• Keep Your Fucking Bullshit Politics Out of People's Lives! The insane... FUCKING INSANE... crusade against IVF is usually seen as something that affects only women. That's not true. It affects women, men, and those identifying as neither... it affects families. And I am disgusted to my core that dumbfuck politicians who don't give a shit about facts... or ANYTHING or ANYONE except MONEY and POWER... put these dipshit laws on the books. Fuck them and all the people who vote them into office. A man wrote an article for GQ Magazine talking about what he and his family went through, and it's worth a read.

   
• NEWSFLASH: Republican senator blocks bill to protect IVF. Cindy Hyde-Smith is a literal ghoul. She's a shell of a woman who has been filled with a hatred for other women that's shockingly brutal and cruel. Nothing quite like watching a woman embrace the patriarchy to dismantle an option for women who want to be mothers. I get why regressive men vote for toxic, misogynistic pieces of shit to represent them in government. But I will never in a million years understand how women vote for... whatever the fuck this horrific excuse of a human being is... who works overtime to endanger their lives and strip away their rights...

If your God didn't want IVF for us, HE WOULD HAVE DESIGNED HUMAN EMBRYOS TO BE DESTROYED WHEN FROZEN! But of course their belief in an all-powerful deity doesn't allow logic to be applied to anything, so here we are. Fucking anti-science dumbshits making a decision for others in the "Land of the Free" over an issue they probably don't even fucking understand. Sadistic fucks.

   
• Spam! Just when I think I've hit all the keywords to stop spam texts from politicians reaching me, along comes one more to add. Eventually I'll get there! I regret more than just about anything I've ever done sending money to one candidate... ONE... via "ActBlue." And the spam texts and emails have never, ever stopped ever since. No matter how many emails or phone numbers I block. The fuckers just keep making up new ones...

I love how ActBlue, which is about as skeezy an operation as you'll find just says "It's not our fault you keep getting donation requests from us... we just just provide tools for candidates to fundraise! You can't blame us!" And yet... all the people "using their services" are constantly saying "It's not the criminals! It's the guns that are the problem!" So... which is it? If ActBlue acted responsibly and forbade people from using their donation processing system if they send spam texts, and accepted complaints from people getting spammed with ActBlue requests who never "opted in," then there wouldn't be a problem. But ActBlue doesn't give a fuck. The more people using their service, the more money they make. And so I will never, ever donate to any candidate using ActBlue. I wish others would do the same. Then candidates would have nobody to blame but themselves for getting into bed with these fucking assholes.

   
• Fishy! The first Aquaman was dopey fun. So long as you didn't think too hard, it wasn't horrifically bad. Kind of a fantastical globe-spanning adventure. But Aquaman 2? Yeah, it's horrifically bad. And though some of the visuals are really great... most of it is so bad that it practically looked animated like a cartoon. And not in a good way. As if all that wasn't enough, the film is obsessed with Aquaman having piss be squirted in his mouth. Baby piss. Octopus piss. I spent the movie pretty sure that his wife is going to be pissing in his mouth any minute now. Or just full-on brick in his mouth. Which is the natural escalation we need. Hilariously, they ended Aquaman 2 the same way that they ended Black Panther... and THEN they ended it AGAIN the same way they ended Iron Man! They copied TWO Marvel Studios movie endings in the same film! Holy shit am I glad that the Zack Snyder reign of terror over the DCU is now officially over.

   
I guess that's enough trash for one Sunday. See you next week.