I may be back from a few days vacation and mentally preparing myself to return to work, but the bullets cannot be stopped... because an all new Bullet Sunday starts... now...

   
• Andor! The first thing I did after getting home from vacation was take a nap. I had been up for 23 hours and needed sleep. The second thing I did? Watch the final three episodes of Andor...

And, yes, this is officially the best thing to ever come out of Star Wars in my humble opinion. So as not to spoil anything, I'll wait a while before breaking down my thoughts (and I do have them). Suffice to say that you should watch this. Whether you're a Star Wars fan or not.

   
• Murdery Goodness! The second thing I watched? Murderbot on AppleTV+. I was surprised that they are deviating from the excellent source material like they are... but I don't hate it. The show is just a separate thing. Not always in a bad way. Especially with the opening credits, which looks like it was made with dolls...

I can see where some diehard fans of the books will not like it, but I still think it's worth a watch.

   
• Super! The final Superman trailer has dropped...

This looks so good. I may actually end up in the theater for this one.

   
• Blast From the Past! Something that got brought to my attention... somebody has an old Blogography Bad Monkey hat for sale on eBay...

Wasn't expecting that! And $25... I think I sold them for half that?

   
• Duke's! If you think that I went all the way to Honolulu, Hawai‘i and didn't have lunch at Duke's, just like the good ol' days, you don't know me at all...

That Falafel Sandwich was ever so dreamy!

   
• Puka Dog! If you think that I went all the way to Honolulu, Hawai‘i and didn't grab a Puka Dog, just like the good ol' days, you don't know me at all...

I mean, yeah, it's called "Hula Dog" outside of Kauai now, but it's still a delicious veggie Puka Dog.

   
• Maters! When I got home, I noticed that tomatoes were starting to grow on my AeroGarden. At last...

I'm still not convinced that AeroGarden is feasible for anything but herbs, but here we are.

   
And now? Back to my post-vacation blues.

Aulani is a beautiful resort which strives to feel authentically Hawai‘ian in many ways. But because it is a Disney property, it is built with their movies and shows in mind to make it a destination that's uniquely theirs and worth a visit for their fans.

As you might guess, Lilo & Stitch is a big part of the intellectual property littered throughout the property. Stitch and Angel make regular appearances...

As does the title character from Moana, which is where you'll find the most stunningly authentic-looking film-to-screen representation of a cartoon character you'll ever see, because... holy crap...

Now here's where things get interesting.

Many people do not know about Mickey Mouse's teddy bear "Duffy." He was a gift from Minnie Mouse to keep Mickey from getting lonely when he's traveling the world. I know about Duffy because he's the signature character at Tokyo Disney Sea theme park (across from Tokyo Disneyland). I'm not kidding when I say that Duffy is at least as popular as Mickey Mouse there. Walking through the park it's all-Duffy all the time. He's everywhere.

My mom collected teddy bears and fell in love with Duffy after I brought her a small plush souvenir from one of my trips to Japan. He's never been very popular with Americans, but Duffy does appear at the USA parks anyway to appeal to visitors from Asia. My mom got to meet him a couple times when I took her along on work trips to Orlando and Los Angeles...

Because Hawai‘i is such a big tourist destination for Asia, Aulani has appearances by Duffy and ShellieMay (Minnie's teddy bear)...

But the signature Duffy character at Aulani is Olu Mel, the turtle. He was created specifically for Aulani, but can be found at the Disney parks in Asia too...

The line to visit him is long... packed with Duffy super-fans who may very well have come to Aulani just to see where Olu Mel came from...

A huge part of the entertainment for me came from the many art installations around the resort. There's a lot of it, and you could probably spend an entire day walking through every floor and the grounds trying to see it all...

Hey... Look at That! It's Maui's Magical Hook!

Other than the beach itself, the resort has plenty of water-based entertainment... pools, kiddie splash areas (including the terrific Menehune Bridge), and a lazy river, of course. Though too many people are hanging on a tube and practically running around the route. Which is kind of frustrating for people who just want to be lazy and float in the sun because you're constantly having to move out of their way...

There's also a couple water slides that go through lava tubes in the volcano that's in the middle of the resort. One for people and another for people on tubes...

Disney sells "MagicBands" at their parks and cruise ships that you can wear to open your room/cabin door, pay for purchases, and interact with stuff. You can also buy/use MagicBands at Aulani for the same purpose. Alas, there's not many interactive elements to be found and they are really difficult to activate. The biggest is the main lobby where a bird lights up on the floor and magical raindrops appear to hit the ground. Outside there's a hole in a rock where an owl lives... and a magical rock where a turtle appears when you wave a MagicBand over it...

It would be nice if Disney were to make these interactions work more easily and consistently, and had a lot more of them. Otherwise it's pretty tough to recommend buying a MagicBand except for the convenience of opening your hotel room door and paying for stuff.

Disney provides a bunch of free activities throughout the day. There's walking tours for art, wildlife, culture, and the resort design... fire pit storytelling... ‘ukulele lessons... etc. In addition, there's plenty of traditional free activities to be found. Ping pong, cornhole, crafts, boogie boards, and the like.

But there's also some "premium experiences" that are paid activities. Like yoga lessons on the beach. You can feed fish, snorkel, or even scuba dive at Rainbow Reef. You can take a painting classes. You can design your own Mickey ears. You can learn to mix cocktails. You can rent a cabana. You can go for a boat ride. And of course you can visit the pricey spa.

Overall there's plenty to do at the resort if relaxing on the beach is too boring for you (which was pretty much all I did, other than eat, during my first two stays). And, naturally, the rest of the island is there for you to explore... something I'd highly recommend. Just be warned that if you rent a car, parking is something like $40 a day at Aulani. If you're only running into Honolulu once or twice, it might be better to take a shuttle from the airport and use Über (the nearest bus stop is at least a mile from Aulani).

Ultimately, the high cost makes Aulani out of reach for most people. And I honestly don't know that I'd recommend it given the many, many other options on Oahu that are far cheaper. But if you're a Disney super-fan with money to burn, it's an experience that's tough to beat.

Disney's Aulani Resort on Oahu has plenty of dining options, and there's always at least one "plant-based" option on the menus for vegans and vegetarians, so you won't starve if you share my dietary choices. Furthermore, service is impeccable everywhere you go. Even at the one bad food experience I had, the server was beyond great. Food, generally is pretty darn expensive, but worth the price. You're paying to stay inside the Disney Bubble here, but I think that they put in the effort to at least give you some value for the money.

Here are the restaurant options I saw while visiting for my all-too-brief stay.

‘AMA‘AMA — 5 course, $130 (not including drinks)
Insanely expensive, but some of the best food you'll eat with service and views to match (we had a beach-view table). I started with a Waipoli Greens Salad, substituted the Ginger Chickpea Spread for the mushroom appetizer I couldn't eat, had a Local Vegetable Fricassee for my entrée, then the Pineapple Tart for dessert. Everything was perfect except reservations. I booked through the app at the only date and time available... 8:00pm on Wednesday, then saw it in my future plans. Before I left for Hawai‘i, I got a "Robo-Caller" call that I didn't pick up. Once I listened to the voicemail from ‘AMA‘AMA wanting confirmation, I immediately called back and confirmed. At which point my reservation disappeared. I eventually confirmed at the desk that my reservation had been canceled with no explanation, but got them to re-activate it. Finally stopped by the concierge desk because the reservation never appeared after too many shenanigans, and they got me a new reservation at 6:00pm for the same day (out of pity, I'm guessing). This nonsense was unacceptable, even though it resulted in a better time. Phenomenal experience though. You may even get an adorable teeny-tiny gecko friend to join you...

Makahiki — 3 course, $80 (not including drinks)
The only disappointment during my stay. My starter of a Roasted Tomato Soup was excellent. My dessert of Warm Mickey Brownies was great. But my entrée of Vegan Sausage Pasta? Inedible. Not even joking. No idea if it was cooked wrong or what, but the vegan pasta was tough, bone-dry, and gummy like glue. The sausage was rubber. Horrific. Could not believe it was served to me. Furthermore, when it comes to the view you can't see much past the greenery, so it wasn't as nice as what you could get elsewhere. Maybe the Character Breakfasts are good, but I would only eat here if you're not vegetarian.

The ‘Ōlelo Room — Price Varies
Gorgeous, intimate bar off of neighboring Makahiki. The malasadas donuts at breakfast were the best on the island I've had outside of Leonard's. But it's the drinks that are out of this world. We put ourselves in the hands of master mixologist, Aukai, who started with a menu drink... then took us on a custom cocktail journey built around the alcohol we started with. Two nights of some of the best-crafted cocktails I've ever had. Highest possible recommendation, but prepared to keep coming back and spending way more money than you plan because it's that good.

Off the Hook — Price Varies
This is a poolside and ocean-view bar which serves elevated bar food. Lunches are great. Plant-Based Burger ($23) is much better than average. Drinks are tasty.

KA WA‘A, A Lū‘au — Buffet, $190 (general seating) or $219 (preferred seating)
The Polynesian Cultural Center has what's probably the best lū‘au on the island of Oahu, but it's produced by The Mormons, so no alcohol is served. The entire point for me is getting plowed on unlimited cocktails which, surprisingly, Disney has available at Aulani. What they also have is a beautiful show that feels respectful to the art of hula, albeit with a small amount of Mickey and Minnie injected, which is a little inappropriate(?). I've done this lū‘au before but, not surprisingly, I don't remember much about the food. This time I can confirm that the food was pretty darn good for a lū‘au! And there was enough vegetarian options to satisfy me too. The price is crazy-high, but the production values are top-notch and more kid-friendly.

Ulu Cafe — Price Varies
This is a "grab-and-go" cafe/market which also has pizzas that are surprisingly good quality. My 12-inch Cheese Pizza had tasty sauce and a great crust. Don't know that it's worth the $20 price tag, but it's one of the cheaper meals at the resort.

Little ‘Opihi's — Price Varies
This is a beach-side stand that serves Pineapple Dole Whip or Pineapple Dole Whip swirled with Vanilla Soft Serve ($8). What can I say, it's awesome.

Mama's Snack Shop and Pāpālua Shave Ice — Price Varies
Just cute little snack shops with fries ($8) or other fried snacks like fish or chicken ($20) or shave ice ($8) in the pool area. I wasn't here long enough to eat at either, unfortunately, but the shave ice is in the shape of Mickey Mouse, so how bad can it be?

One of my favorite things to do on vacation is eat. Disney's Aulani Resort makes it worth the trip if you don't look at the prices until you get back.

To be continued. Tomorrow I'll look at the entertainment at Aulani.

I used to get to Honolulu fairly often for work. In many ways, it's just another big city. But it's a big city in Hawai‘i, which means it's more than that. And the island of O‘ahu is more than Honolulu. And over the years I've tried to reach as much of it as I can.

On Monday I flew into Honolulu again, but made a point to get as much vacation out of the trip as I could. Which wasn't much, but we do what we can.

I've been to the Disney Aulani Resort twice before. So far as too-big too-crowded too-commercial options go for a visit to "The Gathering Place" of Hawai‘i, it's quite nice. Assuming you can afford it. Like everything Disney, it's crazy-expensive and not for those without deep pockets. Which hardly describes myself, but if you get lucky and plan far enough in advance and stay only a few days, you can happen across deals which won't cost you a second mortgage.

Then Disney Magic™®© is just a flight away...

My first stay at Aulani was an early-access kind of thing with a room facing the heart of the resort, which would be nice except it was a lower floor and there was a big palm tree in the way. My second was a "partial ocean view" which was mostly a view of the Four Seasons Resort next door. This time I also had a "partial ocean view" which had the Four Seasons in it, but a considerably more "ocean" view than before...

Where I was at on the 14th Floor is high enough to have a great view of the resort every time you leave the elevator, which was nice...

This morning I did something I wanted to do on my previous visits but was too lazy to actually do... get up just as the sun rises at 5:30am and photograph the incredible architecture without annoying people around...

I wanted to get a photo of the moon setting on the beach at Aulani, and was surprised to see that it aligned perfectly between the reef break in the lagoon...

I walked out to the point of the lagoon that they carved out to look back at Aulani at sunrise, which was a nice walk and worth it...

Shooting into the sun was not easy, and there's only so much that an iPhone can do, but it's still pretty...

Disney does try to work in some history of Hawai‘i and its peoples in-between all the Disney IP, which was nice...

And... The End. I went back to get some sleep, which is the best part of vacation, really...

To be continued. Tomorrow I'll take a look at the Eats of Aulani.

Don't worry about all my looming deadlines at work, I still have time for you, dear reader... because an all new Bullet Sunday starts... now...

   
• The Bicycle Thief! All this pupper wanted was some pets... even if it was from a bicycle thief...

I hope that the dog didn't run away. That would be worse than losing a bike because your automated garage door opener (likely) screwed up (it's happened to me).

   
• Cat Coaster! I can't get enough of this (here's a link in case Instagram is being a dick)...

I wonder if, from the cat's viewpoint, they feel like this is the real deal? And that has me wondering if it's traumatizing. Though I suppose they could alway jump out.

   
• Virus! Yeah... I'll take all the vaccinations. All of them. SCIENCE, BITCHES!

Even that might be enough to save me, but at least I can say I tried.

   
• Strange New Gorn! Despite a bit of a continuity problem when it comes to the Gorn, the second season finale for Star Trek: Strange New Worlds was incredible...

My mind is still boggling at the thought that this is my favorite Star Trek now. I never, ever thought that anything would eclipse the original series for me.

   
• Florida? The repugnant shit going on in Florida to teach kids that slavery was a good thing because enslaved people learned “job skills” that could be used after emancipation can be easily refuted. But this gentleman vividly illustrates why it’s a bullshit concept that doesn’t deserve any consideration (here's a link in case TikTok is being a dick)...

Fuck FOX “News” and their white suprematist agenda forever.

   
• Rao No! Well, shit. Campbell's Soup bought Rao's Homemade sauces. Guess we can kiss that brand goodbye. Like every other great brand that gets bought by a mega-corp, Campbell's is most certainly going to fuck up the recipe with cheaper ingredients so they can squeeze more money out of it. The way Kraft fucked up Boca Burger is still very fresh in my mind. It was good while it lasted, I guess.

If there's one thing you can count on, it's that companies with billions of dollars to throw around will ruin the brands they absorb, despite them always saying "We won't change a thing!" Because do you know how many times this has been promised? Current CEO of Campbell's says "WE WON'T CHANGE THE RECIPE!!!" But then he gets replaced or fired and the new CEO is all "WE MUST USE CHEAPER INGREDIENTS TO GET MORE PROFITS!" and then it's "WE ARE CHANGING THE RECIPE TO REFLECT CURRENT TRENDS" or some such bullshit. I do not believe it for one second. Not one. This has happened an astronomical number of times with a crazy number of brands. Profits are always the focus of these huge companies. ALWAYS. Maintaining the integrity of Rao's isn't the priority. It's a short game to buy the brand and squeeze as much money out of it as they can before they ruin it. And then they're on to the next beloved brand.

   
• RUINED!!! I had to step away from my TikTok "For You Page" for a while, because people who "Had their Maui vacation ruined!" or "Had their Maui wedding ruined!" or what the fuck ever were enraging me to entirely new levels. There was a "social media coach" bitching because her 25th birthday to Honolulu was ruined when her flight was cancelled... SO SHE WENT TO MAUI... and took away much needed resources from people trying to survive the fires. I’m amazed... but not surprised at these assholes. This guy says what I’ve been thinking (here's a link in case TikTok is being a dick)...

Sorry about your vacation... but there are people still missing. Have some perspective for crying out loud.

   
And that's a wrap on bullets.

Home again and all is well... because an all new Bullet Sunday starts now...

   
• Homeward. And, just like that, Hawaii is over for me. I would have liked to have stayed another couple days to hang out with my friends and relax but, alas, I've got a cat back home that is undoubtedly really, really anxious to get out of the hospital. I did get bumped to First Class, which is kinda like a vacation. A vacation with a bowl of warm nuts...

The last time I came to Hawaii for fun was when I managed to tack a few days on the back-side of a work trip in 2011. The four times since then were all work all the time. And while I wouldn't have missed this wedding in Oahu for anything, coming to photograph an event is still work!

   
• Salmon. I have been this close to flying Alaska Airlines' Salmon-Thirty-Salmon too many times to count. But I'm always a gate or two away. Like today...

It's not every day you get to fly in a plane painted to look like a big fish... and, alas, today is not my day either.

   
• Simon. On my trip to Honolulu on Friday I saw the available movies I hadn't seen (Tomb Raider, yawn... Won't You Be My Neighbor, awesome... and Blockers, surprisingly watchable) and so on my trip back I watched movies I enjoyed that I've already seen... Deadpool 2 and The Disaster Artist... and also Love, Simon...

This movie is so amazingly good (despite a rough start to the third act) and has an ending that's ten tons of wonderful. I've seen it three times now, and one thing continues to stand out... the casting on this film is phenomenal. Not just the main characters, but supporting roles as well. In particular, Josh Duhamel and Jennifer Garner as Simon's parents. I knew Garner could pull off the emotional weight... but Josh Duhamel?!? And yet...

And that clip has been edited down from the original scene.

The first coming-of-age-love-story with a gay lead character from a major studio was going to be a landmark film regardless of how good it was. Or how terrible. The fact that Love, Simon turned out to be something great is just icing on the cake. One can only hope that more films like this entering mainstream culture becomes a step towards more acceptance and less bullying in our schools. Because isn't high school hard enough?

   
• Haerts. In addition to being one of the sweetest, most charming, funny, genuine films in recent memory, Love, Simon has a great soundtrack. It was especially awesome that Wings by Haerts got a snippet into the movie. It's such an amazing song...

And now I'm addicted to it all over again.

   
• Photography. It didn't actually rain on the wedding yesterday, which was nice. A lot easier to shoot photos when you're not soaking wet. The problem was my poor back, which was in spasm the entire day. I was eating muscle relaxers like candy in an attempt to keep being able to move. The good news is that the photos turned out pretty good. Not so much because of my talent as a photographer, but because the bride and groom are phenomenally good-looking... and patient.

And... despite my not being a professional photographer (and especially not a wedding photographer), this was my sixth wedding shoot. No idea how this keeps happening to me.

   
• Home. Jenny meowed when I walked through the door. Meowed after me when I rolled my bag in. Meowed after me when I went to the bathroom. Meowed after me when when I went upstairs. Meowed after me when got undressed. Meowed after me when I got in bed. She did not stop. "Sheesh. I am sorry I had to leave you all alone! Are you going to calm down if I can bring your brother home tomorrow?!?"

Such a sweetheart. I hope that Jake and Jenny's reunion goes well.

   
And... I turn into a pumpkin at midnight, so... much aloha.

Flying to Hawaii for just one day would be depressing if I didn't already have to do it all the time for work. As it were, I'm accustomed to flying across half the Pacific Ocean, spending a day working, then turning around and flying back.

Oh well.

Yesterday at the rehearsal ended up being a pleasant enough day in paradise...

But today? On the day that I'm photographing a wedding? Looks like rain.

And here we go...

Hope my back can hold up for the next twelve hours!

After spending some quality time with Jenny, I said my goodbyes and walked out the door shortly before 4am. That's an hour earlier than I would usually leave, but it's almost impossible to find out what the hell is going on with road work... road closures... road detours... and other road-related crap, so better safe than sorry. Maybe one day our State will have current and accurate information available that's easy to get to... but that's not now.

Turns out my drive was completely without incident, which meant I arrived 3-1/2 hours early. Just as a different flight to Honolulu was boarding. They had room for me in Premium Class, and so...

Oahu's beautiful North Shore awaits.

So there we are, waiting for our ghost hunt to begin when Coal Miner's Granddaughter turns to me and says "Hey, did you see that Kilauea erupted in Hawaii?"

I hadn't.

In March of 2008 a new fissure opened on Kilauea, causing a "vog" (volcanic smog) alert to be issued. Not just for The Big Island, but for neighboring islands as well. I ended up traveling to Hawaii later that year, excited at the prospect of finally seeing a lava flow. But, alas, Pele (Hawaiian goddess of fire) had other plans and there was no lava to be found. There was still vog happening though...

   
Now Pele has unleashed the Real Deal on The Big Island, and unfortunately there are people in the path of her wrath...

Bruce Omori from Paradise Helicopters via Shutterstock and Time Magazine

Bruce Omori from Paradise Helicopters via Shutterstock and Time Magazine

   
The footage is pretty dramatic...

   
Though this is the story that's probably most disturbing!

   
Holy Watchmen, Batman!

   
Such beautiful destruction.

I'm in Hawaii later this year. If the lava thing is still happening, perhaps this will finally be my chance to see it.

Assuming the world hasn't ended by then, of course.

I was looking for background noise to play while I work and ran across Miss Congeniality playing. It's one of those guilty pleasure films that I really don't need to see for the tenth time, which is perfect because I won't be distracted by it.

At one point in the film Sandra Bullock as hapless undercover FBI agent beauty contestant Gracie Lou Freebush is practicing a dance routine and ABBA's Dancing Queen...

   
And now I'm screwed.

Because any time I hear ABBA, I am immediately sucked down a rabbit hole of their amazing oeuvre of pop genius.

There are few songs of theirs that I don't love, but there's one song in particular that's my hands-down favorite... The Name of the Game. It's so beautifully constructed that it's easy to say it must be one of the greatest pop songs ever written. Couple that with the flawless voices of Agnetha Fältskog and Anni-Frid Lyngstad and... well... it's pretty tough to find fault in the magic of it all...

   
Listening to ABBA always leads me to A*Teens, a Swedish teen group that hit the Disney circuit back in 2000. Originally formed as "ABBA Teens," their first album was filled with ABBA covers, including their take on The Name of the Game...

   
What's interesting is that A*Teens ended up having surprising depth, moving past their ABBA covers and creating their own stuff. Yes, it was teen-pop. But it was pretty good teen pop...

   
A*Teens always leads me to Hoku... aka Hoku Ho, daughter of Hawaiian legend Don Ho... who was gaining popularity around the same time that A*Teens were blowing up in the US. Her one album is actually really good, though the song she's probably most famous for is Perfect Day from the movie Legally Blonde...

   
As an interesting aside, Hoku is apparently working on new music and plans on releasing an album this year! The EP has her listed as a "Christian Artist," so I can only imagine that she's no longer going to be singing the bubblegum pop songs that made her famous.

   
Anyway... Hoku always leads me to fellow Hawaiian artist, Iz, and his magical version of Somewhere Over the Rainbow...

   
The voice of Hawaii obviously leads me back to ABBA and Happy Hawaii...

   
And now it starts all over again...