And... I have no internet. And... I'll be traveling for a week. So this very special HEAVILY DELAYED edition of Bullet Sunday starts... eventually...

   
• Sisko! I have been totally addicted to the feral rescue project from TinyKittens.com. They've taken in a young feral kitteh named Sisko whom is very, very pregnant. Feral kittehs are a particular challenge in that they have no trust in humans whatsoever and have to be handled delicately. When they're pregnant, it's doubly so. You can drop by and watch her live here. Or relive past videos like this one...

Not a very comfortable-looking momma, that's for sure.

   
• Asshole! Just in case you need lessons...

I meet at least a half-dozen professional asshole drivers every day!

   
• Biblical! A very interesting look at "Your Deeply Held Religious Beliefs."

   
• Electra Woman! This is really happening...

Flawless casting.

   
• Pointless. Can I be honest with you? When celebrities completely miss the point on something and go all sanctimonious with their bullshit, it drives me crazy...

Listen, Harry Connick Jr., that's not what people are saying at all. When somebody says "better get a shotgun" because your daughter is of dating age... this has absolutely nothing to do with your daughter, her self-esteem, or her judgement. It has everything to do with the fact that horny teenage boys are going to be busting down your door trying to plan and scheme to date your daughter... or, more likely, have sex with your daughter. Your misunderstanding here is that only guys "of a certain caliber" are going to be attracted to her when, in fact, every heterosexual boy on earth is going to be attracted to her. Especially in today's highly-sexualized society. The metaphorical shotgun is so that you can fend off the bastards so your daughter has the opportunity to attract the guys of the caliber she deserves. So climb off your high horse and calm down before your inane rant makes you look like an idiot or something.

   
And, I'm out. Here's hoping this gets posted before next Bullet Sunday comes around...

Just goes to show... you can't have a debate over the Confederate Flag without dragging marriage equality into the mix!

Any bets on how long it'll be until this asshole is caught with an underage male prostitute in some seedy airport hotel?

Yeah. Definitely overcompensating for something.

Probably hates they idea of gay marriage because it's just so damn tempting to him.

Meanwhile, the rest of the world is waking up to the novel concept that UNLESS YOU'RE IN A SAME-SEX RELATIONSHIP, SAME-SEX MARRIAGE DOESN'T FUCKING AFFECT YOU.

Unless, of course, you want to be happy for all your friends, co-workers, and family who can finally get married the same way every other tax-paying American can.

Your life just got a little bit more complicated... because Bullet Sunday starts... now...

   
• Married! I'm a huge fan of Murad Osmann and Natalia Zakharova's Instagram artistry. Osmann's series of photos featuring his girlfriend leading him all around the world is captivating...

There's plenty more of these amazing shots over at Instagram.

Congratulations to you both! I look forward to where you'll be taking us next.

   
• Dingbats! I was saddened to learn that Hermann Zapf, world-famous German typographer had died. He created some of the most beautiful typefaces ever crafted, and left a body of work that will be admired as long as we still communicate with letterforms. As noted in the article above, Zapf's favorite typeface he created is "Optima," which is one of my favorites as well. Most people probably know him best for Palatino and Zapf Dingbats, which are fonts that have been installed on a lot of computers over the years. Your artistry will be missed.

   
• Two Bits! Refusing to let a gay man to cut your hair is like refusing to let a Michelin Three Star Chef make you a sandwich. Sublimely stupid. But nobody can accuse homophobic bigots of being smart.

   
• Robertson! What a dumb fucking asshole...

With that logic, how can Pat Robertson be against abortion? Maybe abortion doctors are just an instrument of God who wants to stop the next Hitler from happening. Just die already, you heartless, vile, hypocritical, disgusting turd.

   
• GAH! Guess I'm going to be getting Alzheimer's any minute now: Poor sleep might be the mechanism that triggers Alzheimer’s memory loss.

   
• Moose! Probably the best thing I saw all week...

Hopefully more Alaskans will show some kindness for animals caught in the middle of record high temperatures.

   
So long, bullets.

Why is it whenever I get yet another letter saying "Our systems have been breached and your personal information may have been accessed by attackers..." it is always... always... prefaced by "We were the target of a sophisticated cyberattack?" Sophisticated? Is that supposed to make me feel better? Like I'm sitting here thinking "Boy, I WAS going to be outraged that this company was so careless with my personal information... but since it was a sophisticated attack, I guess there's nothing that could have been done, so I'm totally okay with it!"

I'm guessing they think that putting "sophisticated" in there (usually multiple times) makes them not sound like the incompetent fucking morons they are. But all it does is make me even more outraged that they're trying to whitewash their gross negligence by playing the victim. The company isn't the victim here, it's their customers who trusted them with their personal shit that are the actual victims.

But that's not even the worst part.

At no point in any of these letters do you ever get an actual apology, statement of liability, or admission of negligence.

All you get is worthless promises to do better in the future and possibly a membership in a credit fraud monitoring company for a year or two. In other words, there are zero consequences for a company completely fucking you over by failing to protect your privacy.

Not counting the billions of dollars that insurance company lobbyists pay our politicians to look the other way, of course.

Now that marriage equality is blowing across the country like a righteous wind of rainbows and glitter, it should come as no surprise that homophobic political bigots are devising new ways to be on the wrong side of history.

Take it away, Jon Stewart...

   
There's a lot of hypocritical idiocy on display here, but Tony Tinderholt is the cherry on top of the bigot sundae...

This piece of shit can get married as many times as he wants... FIVE times at current count... but it's the gays who are ruining the sanctity of the institution?

Uh huh.

Amazing how somebody who lied about their employment history... committed insurance fraud... left children in the care of drug-abusers... and allowed a minor to be served alcohol, become intoxicated and then drive drunk... is in a position to dictate what people are and are not allowed to do with their personal lives.

Uh huh.

It's only a matter of time until he's exposed for sleeping with an underage gay prostitute, busted for cocaine, or is caught strangling a puppy. These people can't seem to stop themselves. The rules don't apply to their lives, after all.

Uh huh.

You can stop being depressed that the end of Daylight Saving Time stole an hour of your life... because Bullet Sunday starts... now...

   
• Saturday Night! How refreshing to watch an episode of SNL that doesn't have you fast-forwarding through the whole thing! The highlight of the episode, of course, was guest host Chris Hemsworth as Thor celebrating The Avengers' triumph over Ultron...

"Victory Party at Dave & Busters" is probably one of the best things to appear on Saturday Night Live in over a decade.

   
• Heroic! And speaking of Marvel comic book movie heroes named "Chris" doing amazing things... even though Chris Evans won his Super Bowl bet with Chris Pratt, he appeared at Seattle Children's Hospital in costume as Captain America anyway...

This is after he appeared with Pratt (who was in costume as Star Lord) at Boston's Christopher's Haven after winning the bet...

What a decent couple of guys. It would have been so easy to skip the effort involved in doing something so amazing... on top of raising $27,000 for these terrific children's charities... but they're using their fame and fortune exactly how it should be used, and that's the best kind of hero you can be.

   
• Super! Well, it's not as hideous as I feared... a little dark maybe... but the suit for the upcoming Supergirl television show has been revealed...

Costume designer Colleen Atwood has a pretty darn good track record with the costumes for Arrow and The Flash, and it looks like she's got another home run on her hands. Melissa Benoist is certainly looking super enough for the part, that's for sure.

   
• Presidential? HE'S offended?!? I don't know what offends ME more... that Rand Paul is a bigoted piece of shit... or that he's propagating anti-vax idiocy... or that his concept of foreign policy is so far removed from reality that he might as well live in Narnia... or that some of his domestic policy ideas are so impossibly naive that you have to wonder if he's switched bodies with his younger 13-year-old self like what happened in that Jennifer Garner movie 13 Going on 30... or... or... or... holy crap... he's probably going to run for president, isn't he?

   
• McCarthyism! If my name were associated with being a complete and total piece of shit who is responsible for children getting sick and even dying, I'd want to change it too.

She's just the absolute worst.

   
• Lonny! I have no clue how Next Time on Lonny escaped my notice... for two seasons... but catching up on the web series while working at work this fine Sunday was definitely the best part of my day. WARNING: Contains all matter of profanity, depravity, and violence... definitely NSFW...

Sure thing, Dog Moon! You can't just watch just one, because the insanity escalates with each new episode.

   
• Sausage! If Lonny wasn't enough to satisfy your comedy craving this fine Sunday, the guys at Nacho Punch have created a porn film "by Wes Anderson" that's beyond dead-accurate...

You know you're getting tired of the repetitive wackiness of Wes Anderson films when you can't tell the parodies from the real thing any more.

   
The end. I'd post more bullets, but with only 23 hours in the day, I haven't got the time.

A couple years ago, I pledged $58 to a Kickstarter project by Peter Molyneux's "22 Cans" so they could complete a new game called Godus. It was to be inspired by the game Populous, which is one of my favorite computer games of all time. In it, you are playing a "god" who uses their ever-escalating abilities to control the lives of your in-game "followers."

At first, things were good. 22 Cans provided regular updates, often videos with Peter Molyneux himself. As the weeks turned into months, I was quite pleased to follow along with their progress, and thought everything was coming along beautifully. When the beta was released, I played around with it for a while... but didn't have time to devote to something that was still pretty rough. Eventually I deleted the game and thought I'd wait until it was finished.

But it hasn;t been finished. They're still working on it.

Nevertheless, I wanted to see what was happening with the $58 I paid, so I downloaded the Mac and iPhone versions to see what was happening.

As expected, the game looks beautiful. I love the design aesthetic, and am very impressed with how things are working...

The game is also kind of touching, as using your god powers can have terrible consequences for your followers... like when you destroy somebody's home so you can clear the land for bigger and better things...

Good stuff.

Untill...

Things eventually turn to shit.

Because Peter Molyneux and 22 Cans aren't creating a complete game. They're building a half-baked piece of shit that contains "in-game purchases." Yes, the game is free to download (thanks to the money I and a lot of other people donated) but, in order to get the most out of it, you have to pay real money to get ahead. Dubbed "freemium" games, these horrendous blights on gamers are fucking awful because you don't own the whole game. In order to play the way it was meant to be played, you have to keep paying for it. And paying and paying and paying...

In Godus you're buying gems. The gems can then be exchanged for things like "follower flags" that increase the happiness of your followers. Because if your followers aren't happy, they'll leave. You can also buy things you need to keep the game moving... like wheat. Because if you don't buy it, you'll be waiting days to make progress and keep playing.

I'm sure Molyneux will argue that you don't have to keep paying extra money... but he'd be full of shit. Because any time you try to do anything where you don't have enough power, Godus will literally keep wagging an invitation for you to buy more gems in the corner of the screen...

And it's annoying as shit, as you might imagine.

So how do I feel after paying $58 for a complete game and getting this bullshit?

Betrayed. Lied to. And very, very angry.

I don't buy "freemium" games. They're moronic crap and I have no interest in being jerked around like this. If 22 Cans had been honest from the beginning with their intent to nickel-and-dime their supporters, I would have never donated the money.

So lesson learned. Guess I won't be Kickstarting games any more.

Jesus, what assholes.

UPDATE: And it just keeps getting better. Godus requires you to be online while playing. If you don't have internet access, you don't play. If you do have internet access, but Godus servers are down, you don't play either...

It's almost comical just how shitty this app is. I've reset my iPhone more times since installing Godus than I have in all the years since I bought my first iPhone. So much for Apple's Editor Choice awards meaning a damn thing.

I know I just wrote about the Greenpeace desecration of the Nazca lines yesterday, but I've only grown more enraged over the issue, and can't seem to let it go. This is outrageously disgusting on every level, and all those involved should be fucking shot. They have caused serious damaged to an artifact of massive historical significance and just don't give a shit. Greenpeace apologizes for "offending anyone" but seems to think they are above apologizing for the damage they've done to this cultural treasure...

It's stuff like this that makes me crazy.

And it's not limited to Greenpeace... plenty of other organizations who proclaim to advocate causes with "peaceful protest" do this kind of stupid crap all the time. And they feel fully justified because their "message" is more important than the destruction they cause. Well fuck that. No matter how important their message or how just their cause, Greenpeace made it perfectly clear that the real reason they fight for their environmental issues is for self-glorification and self-promotion. In the end Greenpeace only really cares about... Greenpeace.

Shocker.

No more holiday shopping for you... because Bullet Sunday on Monday starts... now...

   
• Little! One of the most wonderful books ever crafted, Le Petit Prince has inspired a new animated motion picture of the same name...

Yeah. Definitely going to make time to see that.

   
• TURN IT! So there I was... freaking out because yet another video had been shot in vertical and posted to my wall... when I run across THIS...

AND THIS...

YES. FOR HEAVEN'S SAKE... TURN YOUR DAMN PHONE!

   
• Last Days of Ivory. An elephant is murdered every 15 minutes...

   
• Petty Assholes! Take, for example, genocide...

Yeah. Somebody definitely needs to focus on The Big Picture here.

   
• Peace? And Greenpeace moves to the top of my Stupid Assholes list. Not only did they not give a crap about preserving a glorious WORLD HERITAGE SITE... it's obvious they did this idiotic stunt because they're self-serving pieces of shit. They made this perfectly clear... WHEN THEY SIGNED IT WITH THEIR LOGO!

Image front Reuters

Their subsequent non-apology apology only makes them even worse... not sorry we did it... sorry you're offended. Yeah, take your "message of hope" and shove it straight up your hypocritical asses.

   
And... Bullet Sunday out.

"House committee no longer requires public travel disclosure."

Read it. If you dare.

Politicians once again vote themselves accountable to nobody for anything. Exactly what our founding fathers intended for political office, I'm sure!

Yet dumbfuck Americans sit back and let bullshit like this keep happening instead of doing what they should be doing... which is either A) Demanding transparency in who's buying off our elected officials... or B) Lighting their shit on fire.

I hope I'm alive to see our government razed to the fucking ground and rebuilt without all this disgusting corruption that has choked the shit out of the democratically-represented republic we were supposed to be.

To all the traitorous douchebag assholes on the House "Ethics" Committee who made this pile of crap happen... fuck you. Seriously... fuck you, you fucking fucks...

      Susan W. Brooks, (R) Indiana
      Michael E. Capuano, (D) Massachusetts
      Yvette D. Clarke, (D) New York
      K. Michael Conaway, (R) Texas
      Charles W. Dent, (R) Pennsylvania
      Ted Deutch, (D) Florida
      Trey Gowdy, (R) South Carolina
      Patrick Meehan, (R) Pennsylvania
      Pedro R. Pierluisi, (D) Puerto Rico
      Linda T. Sánchez, (D) California

You have all betrayed the public trust so that you can further attempt to betray the public trust. The people whom you pretend to represent... the people who fucking VOTED for you... deserve to know who's PAYING YOU to be their bitch.

So enjoy your lobbyist-sponsored vacations while you can, you unbelievable pieces of shit.

Which will probably be forever, because Americans just don't seem to give a crap.