Ooh! Spring is finally here! But am I going outside to enjoy it? No... because an all new Bullet Sunday starts... now...
• Stuck on You! Betty White's social media advertised that the US Postal Service tribute stamp to her was finally released. As my favorite celebrity of all time, of course I wasted no time heading to the USPS website to buy a sheet and also get the cancelation release...
Note the paw print earring. I also picked up some of the Keith Harring "Love" stamps which I had no idea existed.
• Close to You! Okay. First of all... how could you have never heard Karen Carpenter before? Second of all... I wish I could erase my memories of Karen Carpenter's phenomenal voice so I was able to hear her for the first time again...
What's interesting is searching YouTube for this topic. There are a LOT of reaction videos. And all of them go about how you think they would. If you've never heard Karen Carpenter with the music stripped away... you need to do that.
• Tariffs, Anyone? Aerogarden is shutting down, so their hydroponic systems are on sale for half price in a variety of places. I had one at my old place and loved being able to have fresh herbs available... but it broke when I moved.
So I just bought two of them (they only seem to have the small 6-pod units left @ $60, though I'm told they can be had for $50)...
I also bought a boat-load of seed pods (third party, because the Aerogarden has always been crazy expensive). Given how groceries aren't going to get cheaper any time soon... or ever, given how much of our food is grown in Mexico or harvested in the US by migrant workers who are getting deported... I need to do what I can to afford to make meals I love more affordable. Cilantro, which I eat a ton of, has reached $1.70 a bunch. Parsley $2 a bunch. Basil $3 a package. Thyme $3 a package. Jalapeños are 50¢ each. Butter lettuce is $4 a head. It goes on and on.
My $120 Aerogarden investment plus cheap seed pods will end up paying for itself in under a year. Now I'm considering growing my own tomatoes, tomatillos, cucumbers, and peppers outside to save money. The problem is that I work so much I won't be able to tend to them as they need. I dunno. I should try and find a way, because holy shit is eating expensive.
• Nice Beaver! Yeah, baby beavers are about as cute as it gets. Around the 90-second mark you can really hear them crying and squeaking. My heart. The total video is 10-1/2 minutes long, and the babies are just in the first two minutes, but you'll want to watch it all...
Half the video was a beaver eating avocado and beaver chow. I couldn't stop watching.
• License to Kill... A Studio! So I don't get accused of misogyny by hammering away at another incompetent female movie exec (the first being LucasFilm's Kathleen Kennedy) I'm going to let a woman do it in this video (oh man how I love Nerd Cookies!)...
But I am going to chime in and say "Amazon Prime Video... WHAT. THE. FUCK. TOOK. YOU. SO. LONG?!?" Jennifer Salke made so many moronic and expensive mistakes that it's beyond shocking she lasted this long. Usually you have to be a straight white man to get a pass on being this bad at your job. Hopefully Amazon will get their shit together and hire somebody who knows what the fuck they're doing and take advantage of their many amazing IPs. Because MGM deserves better.
• M'Baku to the Future! The Avengers: Doomsday cast announcement video was fun, I guess. But the only addition that truly made me want to happy-dance was Winston Duke as M'Baku. Don't care about the X-Men, but I've wanted a Disney+ M'Baku series since we've had Disney+, and it boggles my mind we haven't gotten one yet...
No Daredevil. No Moon Knight. No Blade. No Eternals. No Marvels. No Spider-Man?!? Strange. Oh... and no Doctor Strange?!?
• U-S-A! U-S-A! Thank heavens anti-vaxers and RFK are intent on bringing back preventable diseases by presenting misinformation about vaccines! The companies who makes iron lungs could use the business after the polio vaccine was developed and wiped out a need for their product. To get a look at what future generations of Americans may be in for, here's an interesting (but sad) look...
I remain absolutely floored at how anti-science rhetoric and "alternate facts" are fucking up this country. And I'm mortified that kids who have no say in getting vaccinated are going to pay the price for it.
And, on that happy note, I'm going to go enjoy this fine (albeit a bit overcast) Spring day... by cleaning my house.
I may not be at home, but I'm still tossing bullets aplenty... because an all new Bullet Sunday starts... now...
• Cinematic Apathy! Simon Stålenhag is a brilliant, brilliant writer/artist who has crafted some of the most amazing books you'll ever see. The Electric State is a beautifully dark and haunting tale where every illustration looks like it belongs in a museum. The Russo Brothers, whose Avengers movies are genius, made a boring, safe adaptation that completely misses the point (on Netflix). It's awful, even though the source material is phenomenal still...
Even if it were a completely new movie that was an original work it would be awful.
• Qualls! This is easily one of the best Hollywood interviews I’ve ever seen...
What a fascinating guy.
• Port of Seattle! I’ve been saying for decades that SeaTac Airport (AKA Seattle-Tacoma Airport) is one of the shittiest airports in the world, even on the Federal level at Border Control. As you can see here. The airport is busted, nonsensical, inconvenient, and prioritizes space for businesses over space and comfort for passengers. I am filled with dread every time I fly out of the shithole. And I’m filled with embarrassment whenever visitors have to use it.
• Found On The Internet Part 7,365,411! I could use this award almost daily...
And so could you if you read this blog daily!
• Reagan?! I'll just put these videos here for no particular reason...
No reason at all.
• Lumon Terminal Pro! BWAH HA HA HAAAA! If you're watching Severance on AppleTV+, then Apple's latest computer may interest you...
• Vaccinate! I feel bad that anybody suffers the consequences of science-denial... it's all programming and ignorance... but I feel even more terrible that their children have to suffer with them. Because Jesus Christ...
Your God gave us vaccines, but here you are... wanting your child to die instead of accepting a literal miracle that was handed to you.
See you on the other side of the mountains. One of these days.
A couple weeks ago, I started blogging 4-5 posts ahead, scheduling everything in advance to post at 7:00am each morning. The reason I did this was because I had a work project I was trying to finish, and knew I might have to skip a day or two here and there. I care like that.
On the 27th of February I re-scheduled the post that was due to publish so I could recognize Gene Hackman dying, and my blog apparently did not like this. My post never published. No subsequent posts published. Everything was broken somehow.
Now, over a week later, I finally had the time to re-install WordPress, copy my database from backup, and verify that everything is working again.
Except I lost all the posts I wrote in advance, because they weren't in the backup I had.
Lovely.
Rather than going back and trying to remember what I was talking about in those posts, I decided to just start over again from today.
By recognizing the passing of Gene Hackman.
The guy is one of my all-time favorite actors. I had likely seen him before he played Lex Luthor in Superman: The Movie (probably in The Poseidon Adventure) but it was his Lex Luthor that made me remember his name...
He was absolutely brilliant in the role. Menacing but not overly-scary for a comic book villain. His delivery of his every line was crafted to push his character forward, and I loved him for it. In the sequel he was no longer the main villain, but managed to steal absolutely every scene he was in.
But that was true for most all his movies. He was so compelling an actor that playing opposite him was a daunting prospect. You knew you were getting eclipsed.
The first headlining role I recall him having was in Hoosiers, which I've seen a ridiculous number of times because it's such a great movie and he's great in it. But the film that made me most appreciate his flexibility is the Kevin Costner classic No Way Out. He has a critical, but relatively small role that cemented him as one of my all-time favorite actors. From there he just kept rolling through all these memorable roles where he killed it every time... Unforgiven, The Firm, Wyatt Earp, and Crimson Tide.
And then came the back-to-back brilliance of his finest comedic works... Get Shorty and The Birdcage. He played a lot of villains, but his comedy chops never faltered (the movie Heartbreakers, which isn't a great film, had his most hysterical role).
Mr. Hackman's final film was Welcome to Mooseport from 20 years ago, which I didn't care for... but before that he worked with one of my heroes, director Wes Anderson, on The Royal Tenenbaums and had a great part in the very good adaptation of John Grisham's Runaway Jury. Not a bad way to end a prestigious career.
When it comes to actors, Gene Hackman will very much be missed. Rest in Peace, sir.
It's a rainy post-vacation weekend, but we're all good... because an all new Bullet Sunday starts... now...
• Jack is Back! God how I love Reacher. The third season just started on Amazon Prime. Alan Ritchson was born to play the part. And the fact that Amazon.com Prime Video puts the money into adapting the stories, and casting good actors, and making it look like a million bucks... well... the show is perfect. If you like action serials, you need to be checking it out...
I am beyond elated that they've already renewed the show for a fourth season. I really wish that they would shoot two series back-to-back each year and get them backlogged so we could get as many of the books shot as possible before Ritchson wants to reture from such a punishing role. Heaven only knows that Amazon can afford it. They're blowing a billion dollars on the gut-wrenchingly awful prequel series to Lord of the Rings travesty.
• Short Round! If you don't adore Ke Huy Quan and find joy in his renewed success after watching this, then I don't know what to say to you...
The guy just released a new movie and has four more coming up, so I guess everybody does adore him.
• LIES! If you know me, you know I LOVE a good advertisement. This one featuring the main three characters from The Californians (Bill Hader, Kristen Wiig, andFred Armisen) from SNL is absolutely perfect...
But it gets better... the leading comment on the video is "STOP SPREADING LIES SNL! The PCH is closed at Santa Monica due to the fires. Stuart would need to take the 5 to the 405 to the 101 then exit Kanan to reconnect to the PCH to get to Point Dume where this is filmed. WUUUUHT ERRRRR YOUUUUU DOOOING?" — Priceless. I still think the Betty White appearance at the SNL 40th Anniversary is my favorite The Californians sketches with its stacked cameos...
How awesome would it be if this was an actual limited series? Peacock needs to make it happen.
• Death to Pennies! President Trump has been doing a lot of heinous shit (I mean, my God), but amongst all that he said we're going to stop making pennies, which is something that should have happened over a decade ago, so okay then...
Here's CGP Grey's original video from 13 years ago on the subject, which brought me onboard killing the penny...
Now if he can do away with changing the fucking clocks twice a year and either make Daylight Saving Time permanent or, ideally, split the difference and have us Spring Forward or Fall Back a half hour... that would be great.
• Good Bye Miss Yvonne! Lynne Marie Stewart, best known for her role as "Miss Yvonne" on Pee-Wee's Playhouse and "Bonnie" on It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, has died...
My favorite thing she's done, however, is this hilarious guest appearance on SNL writer Jimmy Fowlie's series Go-Go Boy Interrupted...
Rest in Peace... you made us laugh, and that's a gift that will never pass.
• Carr Ride! Look, I know that Jimmy Carr is highly problematic. That's his entire brand. You know what you're getting into when you tune in because he's never not offensive to somebody. He works hard to be offensive! That being said, the guy is a brilliant comedian if you get what he's trying to do. His latest "Heckle Amnesty" video is amazing...
What gets me is that Jimmy isn't just finding comedy at the expense others... he goes out of his way to find comedy at the expense of himself. Which is why I find him funny. No, I don't think he's as talented as people who are able to find comedy without punching down on anybody at all (Nate Bargatze is the current king in my book). But this kid is doing alright...
I gotta say... with all the punching down on the trans community by comedians, it's refreshing to find those doing the work to be inclusive. This is what laughing with a person instead of at a person looks like. Yeah, he struggles a bit to get those jokes formed because it's a new situation for him... but he's trying his best to adapt without bigotry and, to me, it seems as though he's succeeding.
• TransAmerican! I am trying my best to take a seat and renew my efforts to listen to what marginalized communities are facing day-to-day. I have a couple trans friends who mean a lot to me, so I've been subscribing to some trans video channels to help me to understand their lives better. In the Year of Our Lord 2025 in these United States of America, I don't get why people who contribute to society, pay their taxes, and live their life the best they can with the cards they were dealt, are actively persecuted just for existing. A lot of lies and misinformation gets peddled against trans persons, and it makes no sense to me. I guess sending unwarranted hate to others makes a good distraction to keep people from looking at what you're doing? I dunno. In any event, this is a good video to watch if you're wondering what a small group of your fellow Americans are dealing with right now...
I wish I understood how we got to where we're at.
Onwards and upwards...
I detest watching shows on ad-laden HBO Max.
Because I know I'm going to have to endure those shitty "HAVE A LITTLE FUN!" Volkswagen ads over and over and over and OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER. This is clearly HBO ripping off Volkswagen by saying "GIVE US LOTS OF MONEY BECAUSE WE DISPLAYED YOUR AD A MILLION TIMES LAST NIGHT!" without telling Volkswagen that those million ads were served to only 50 people. I have nothing against Volkswagen, per se. But the way HBO abuses their advertising has me on the verge of HATING Volkswagen.
I'd walk into one of their dealerships, hear that song in my head, then walk right back out the door.
The movie I am watching... again... is Taking Chance.
Years ago it was mentioned as a good film to watch so as to understand why Dover Air Force Base should be open to the media to cover fallen soldiers returning home. And so I watched it. I was not prepared. I don't think you ever could be prepared to watch it. But it's such an important film that's so beautifully crafted that I think everybody should watch it...
I make a point to see it every couple years when I want to be more emotionally devastated than I already am.
Which is most days, lately.
Finally. FINALLY... after twenty years of attempts to bring the Fantastic Four to film... the actual Fantastic Four from the comics is landing. The Thing finally looks like The Thing. The core concept of the book that is based on a CLOSE FAMILY who are EXPLORERS that go on INCREDIBLE ADVENTURES together has been embraced. And having their story begin on an alternate earth from the 1960's which will differentiate the movie from all the other super-hero movies is absolute genius..
H.E.R.B.I.E.!
THE FANTASTICAR!
THE BAXTER BUILDING!
GALACTUS!
And how flawless is that casting?
Wait... I take it back... The Incredibles was a brilliant adaptation of The Fantastic Four. By far the most accurate, even though it wasn't actually The Fantastic Four. Yet they managed to capture who The Fantastic Four are better than any of the movies with the name did.
The marketing is phenomenal...
My mind is reeling over how the team will be brought to the Marvel Cinematic Universe proper. Will their earth be eaten by Galactus but they're able to cross over to the MCU to try and save our earth from Galactus? Who knows! But I'm dying to find out!
Awww, man. In many ways, David Lynch is a genius who cannot be touched. Between Twin Peaks, Blue Velvet, Mulholland Drive, Eraserhead, and even Dune... WHICH I ARGUE WAS A FANTASTIC ADAPTATION FOR THE DAY... I admire his work so much, and was sad to hear that he had died.
YouTube is not letting me embed an awesome video where David Lynch is talking about the time he met George Lucas because Lucas wanted him to direct Return of the Jedi. But it's awesome so I am giving you the link right here. Everything I love about David Lynch is encapsulated in this story. You MUST watch it. Even if you're not a fan and don't understand his work. Especially then, because it will explain why so many people are fans of his, and how it translates to what he does.
Rest in Peace, sir.
I'm just a boy. Standing in front of the blogosphere. Asking it to love him... because an all new Bullet Sunday starts... now...
• Well Hello Hello! YouTube's algorithm has found me some really cool content over the years. But sometimes it comes too late. This small channel of blacksmithing videos was being shut down. The two guys who created it could never seem to get any traction, as they were continuously buried by the algorithm. But then? YouTube promoted their final video. And it finally took off. They ballooned to 15,000 subscribers, and a lot of people who would have watched had they only known about it, commented as such. And so here they are... coming back...
Kinda a happy ending for everybody. I hope they can keep growing their channel. If you want to take a look, it's pretty cool.
• Future Dutch! So there I was taking a phone call after putting my television on pause. Eventually the Google screensaver engaged, and I came very close to saying WHAT THE BLADE RUNNER ALTERNATE FUTURE IS THIS SHIT?! And noted that the title of the photo included "Vinkeveen" from the Netherlands. So I looked it up and Google Maps and, sure enough...
© Google Maps
© Google Maps
© Google Maps
That is very cool, isn't it?
• Oh, Grand! Just a reminder to everybody who hasn't already used a VPN to watch the new Wallace & Gromit movie on the BBC (they've had it since Christmas)... Netflix finally got off their asses and has it available for streaming in the USA. I'll be watching it again just to show Netflix that this is the kind of awesome content I want to see... not another pile of shit that Zack Snyder crapped out his ass...
The movie is just amazingly well-done and well worth your valuable time.
• The Prologue and the Promise! I recently watched a video on the history of Walt Disney World's Epcot. That lead me to a video on one of the earliest pavilions in Future World called Horizons. I always thought it was a bit shit to two times I visited before they closed, but there was a giant mural inside that I loved. Never really knew who painted it until I watched this video. Apparently some genius at Disney thought to hire renowned futurist painter and celebrated "space" artist Robert McCall to create it. And it is stunning...
© Disney and McCall Studios
© Disney and McCall Studios
You can read more about this amazing work (plus see many others) on the artist's website here.
• Mixbox! WELP! Looks like somebody finally solved the thing I hate most about painting digitally... pigments never work as they should. Programs like Photoshop and Procreate use an additive model which turns everything into a muddy mess. But now a company has come up with a model which simulates actual pigments. This is incredible...
I hope that the Mixbox technology is added to mainstream apps very soon now... it's amazing to me that it's taken this long to get here.
• IT'S THE FOG! The Mystery Government Fog is out to get us! DEFEAT THE FOG 2025! (here's a link in case TikTok is being a dick).
@dr.eric.b #fyp ♬ original sound - Eric
FINALLY! The threat of alien spores is being taken seriously by the health care community! Thanks, Dr. Eric!
• Unsurprised! My grievances against PayPal are well documented. They stole money from me. They said that a customer didn't get merchandise I sold to them and reversed the money. I provided USPS tracking showing the delivery. I provided an email from the customer saying that they received their order and that they didn't receive a refund. PayPal didn't give a single fucking shit. They kept the money. And since they are not governed by banking regulations, there's NOTHING I CAN DO ABOUT IT. After pestering them for months, they simply stopped responding. So I closed down the Artificial Duck store and was done. I never made a single dollar profit on the shop, sold everything at cost and exact shipping, and did it for the fun of it all. There's no way I could continue and take a loss because payments are revoked over a total lie.
And now it comes out that these heinous fucking assholes at PayPal are just as bad as we knew they were. They've been fucking over their advertisers and their customers with their "Honey" service. Get a load of this...
Nothing would make me happier than PayPal being sued out of existence and shut down. But that will never happen. They get protection from shitty fucking laws that our government creates because our government is too busy sucking Big Business dicks to give a shit about protecting the citizens that elect them. Welcome to the hellscape that it The United States of America.
Alrighty then. Until next Sunday then!
And here we go... my annual wrap-up of my favorite films of the year! Or, to be more accurate, my favorite films that I actually saw. Which has been hampered severely by my unwillingness to go to the theater. The experience is absolute shit in a day-and-age where people are inconsiderate assholes, and I am just not doing it. And so I am stuck to streaming services where I sometimes miss movies because I rotate through all of them rather than paying the stupid prices they charge. Oh well. Still love movies though.
THE TWELVE BEST...
These are my favorite movies from this year that I managed to see.
#1 Dune: Part Two (Legendary/Warner Bros.)
If Villeneuve's Dune: Part One was a masterpiece, then Dune: Part Two is whatever word is beyond a "masterpiece." It's the grand payoff that the first film sets up, and every second of it looks stunning. Based on one of my favorite novels of all time, the second installment continues the story of Paul Atreides as he forges ahead towards becoming the Fremen messiah. Once again his enemies are all around, headed by the evil Harkonnens and the Emperor himself. While Villeneuve made a few choices I didn't care for (Thufir Hawat was short-changed in the first film... and he was nowhere to be found in this one?) but the vast majority of his approach to the material is interesting and flawlessly executed. Especially when you consider how rich, dense, and impossible to adapt the book is. Overall a stunning cinematic achievement that's my favorite movie of 2024... and has me anticipating Villeneuve's finale to the trilogy with Dune Messiah when he gets around to it.
#2 The Fall Guy (Universal)
Well, well, well, color me shocked. An old TV show turned into a film that doesn't suck? Will wonders never cease. And not only does the film not suck, it's actually very darn good. Ryan Gosling playing stunt man Colt Seavers knocks it out of the park yet again in a story that has a perfect blend of action, twists, mystery, and humor to make it a great watch from beginning to end. Add in Emily Blunt, Hannah Waddingham, and a few surprises and, well, it's unapologetically my #2 film of 2024.
#3 The Wild Robot (Dreamworks)
Chris Sanders created my favorite Disney film of all time, Lilo & Stitch... plus had his hand in loads of other classics like Aladdin, The Lion King, and How to Train Your Dragon. It should come as absolutely no surprise that his take on a beloved children's book would be aces... and it is. Beyond gorgeous in execution, every frame is a work of art, and the story unfolds in a way that is the very definition of "heartwarming." The film was so well-received that a sequel is already in the works, and I can't wait to see it.
#4 The Ministry of Ungentlemanly Warfare (Starz/Amazon)
Inspired by Winston Churchill's declassified files, Guy Richie unleashes his cinematic genius in WWII a film that doesn't reach his past heights, but was still entirely great and worth my valuable time. Henry Cavill and Alan Ritchson lead a team that excels at stylized violence with a comedic edge. And if you love nothing more than watching Nazis getting slaughtered by the hundreds while witty banter ensues, this is your film.
#5 The Beekeeper (MGM)
After wasting away in The Expendables, The Meg, and Fast & Furious franchises, Jason Statham is finally back in true form for the first time I can think of since 2016's The Mechanic sequel. And it's a glorious action-revenge flick that has some of the best Statham action beats I've seen in a long time. A former "Beekeeper"... one of a mysterious group of assassins with government ties... Statham is out for blood after his landlord is scammed out of charity money and commits suicide. It's a fantastic ride which features... Jeremy Irons? And is one of my favorite flicks of 2024.
#6 Deadpool & Wolverine (Marvel Studios)
I've watched the first two Deadpool films more times than I'd ever admit because they're just so hilariously entertaining. The third film was sure to be a slam-dunk for me, but didn't really live up to my lofty expectations. Not because I'm tired of the character or think the film was bad, but because the franchise swerved from where it seemed to be heading. Wolverine was great fun and handled well... and the action was great, but the whole diversion into the multiverse of Deadpools was boring Fortunately there was a slew of awesome guest appearances and Emma Corrin's deliciously wicked Cassandra Nova to make it all worthwhile.
#7 Wallace & Gromit: Vengeance Most Fowl (Netflix)
This is what it looks like when somebody takes their time to make sure a project is perfect before starting in as opposed to throwing something together just because you want to release something. A sequel to The Wrong Trousers, infamous criminal Feathers McGraw is back to wreck vengeance on our favorite clay duo for ruining his plans to steal The Blue Diamond and getting him jailed. Hilarity ensues. This is a stunningly beautiful animated feature which uses traditional clay-based characters and physical sets instead of CGI. Really hope that Aardman is not done with the characters yet, because this was gold from start to finish.
#8 Nowhere Special (Lucky Red)
A 2020 film that didn't make it to the USA (or streaming) until 2024, this is a slow, methodical character piece that will destroy you with its exceptional performances. Inspired by a true story(!), a window washer in Ireland finds out he doesn't have long to live and tries to find a home for his young son who's his entire world. And while James Norton adds a depth to his character which is remarkable to watch... it's Daniel Lamont as the kid that will crush you. The majority of the time I find child actors insufferable with their artificial delivery and stiff presentation, but when you get a child actor who just... works... it's gold. Do not go in expecting anything more than a touching observation on love and letting go, and you'll be rewarded. That's all the film is.
#9 Robot Dreams (B-Team/Wild Bunch)
To be honest, this could have easily gone in my #1 spot. It is an amazing film with an emotional core so devastating that it's more than a little hard to wrap your head around. What helps is the simple animation style for a simple story that has something much, much deeper going on beneath the surface, because it's relatable in a very human way. Which is ironic considering it's about animals and robots. That it manages to communicate so much with no dialogue is just icing on the cake.
#10 Furiosa: A Mad Max Saga (Warner Bros.)
Despite the fact that I was pissed off Charlize Theron was not reprising her amazing turn as the titular character, I tuned in because the critical acclaim was too good to ignore. Turns out it was justified. While not as good as the first film, the prequel has an awful lot going for it, providing back-story for a character that needed to be told. Action-packed with brilliant performances by Anya Taylor-Joy and an unhinged Chris Hemsworth, I'm pretty bummed that it wasn't a much bigger success because I want to see more of George Miller's post-apocalyptic saga.
#11 Alien: Romulus (20th Century)
The Alien movies started with the mind-blowing space-horror original from Ridley Scott that seemed impossible to follow. Then James Cameron said "hold my beer" and proceeded to take things in a fresh direction while honoring every frame of the original. From there it's been a futile series of attempts at continuing the franchise which have moments of brilliance mired in stories that were ultimately forgettable. Fortunately, the curse has been broken with Romulus, which is slick, stylish, scary, and smartly told. No, it's not perfect (resurrecting deceased actors will never feel right), but it's got enough going for it that I was happy to have a new Alien movie.
#12 Beverly Hills Cop: Axel F (Netflix)
Yeah, I know. This is just another retread of an old movie that is banking on nostalgia in order to sell the entire movie. But here's the thing. It works. Eddie Murphy is back as Axel Foley and everything else is secondary. While not the fresh take on the character you'd hope for, it's still funny in the right ways.
HONORABLE MENTION
DISAPPOINTING
WORST
DIDN'T SEE, MIGHT HAVE MADE MY LIST
DIDN'T SEE, MOST CERTAINLY SHIT
Ho Ho Ho! Christmas may be around the corner, but the gift that keeps on giving is here, because an all new Bullet Sunday starts... now...
• Not so flat as we were lead to believe! NEWSFLASH: Flat Earthers realize 'they are wrong' after traveling to Antarctica to prove the Earth isn’t round in hilarious footage. And yet it won't move the needle much (if at all) because flerfers are so accustomed to ignoring painfully obvious empirical evidence in order for their deranged worldview to work that they'll just come up with even more deranged ideas to explain it. Oh well. It was fun while it lasted.
• Selfish Cow! I laughed way too long at this...
But can you blame me?
• Swap! The SNL tradition that never disappoints...
• Sad Milk! NEWSFLASH: Infectious Bird Flu Can Linger in Refrigerated Raw Milk for 5 Days. I wish I understood the whole raw milk movement. It makes zero sense to me. And the fact that people are getting really fucked up (or dead) after drinking it, yet people are still drinking it? That makes even less than zero sense.
If only those who developed the first Disney units could see where Imagineers are now.
• Cravin' No More Kraven! The latest super-hero movie fiasco, Kraven The Hunter, is struggling to make $30 million on its likely $120+ million budget. And that's =chef's kiss= because it probably needs at least $250 million to break even. Between this abomination, Madame Web, and Morbius, you have to ask yourself if our Sony Pictures Spider-nightmare is finally over. Lord I hope so. We're already at peak super-hero movie fatigue, we don't need complete shit like this making it worse. Why doesn't Sony sell their Spider-rights back to Marvel Studios and just stop with this nonsense. FOR THE LOVE OF GOD... PLEASE STOP!!!
• Data Broken! I finally went with one of those data-finder services to scrub as much personal information about me from the Internet as possible. Every time they send a new report, I'm dumbfounded at the number of places I've been popping up. These data brokers are absolute parasites that should shut down. No wonder I get shitloads of spam and spam texts... there's companies working overtime to make it happen. If you want to take a look at the service I picked, DeleteMe, here's my link for 20% off. If you don't want my link, that's okay... you can visit the site without it here.
Only one more set of bullets left in 2024.
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