Jenny likes a vigorous massage. Earlier this week she was complaining because I was half-assing it, focusing more on my work than her. So I used two hands to really rough her up... and she went bananas.

BELLY RUBS AND BUTT SCRATCHES AT THE SAME TIME?!? MORE!!!

Boy was that a mistake. Now she complains when she doesn't get two hands! She meows. She looks at me in disgust. She paces back and forth next to me.

But since I have to work, I've just gotten better and making sure she gets a good one-handed massage and that seems to be okay...

But sometimes I can't resist that sour little face, so I give in and give her that full-body two-hand massage she loves. What a hit to my productivity!

A couple people have been asking for an update on Fake Jake. He's still doing fine... though apparently he doesn't want to sleep inside my neighbor's house much any more. I guess now that the most bitter days of winter are behind us, he prefers his freedom and sleeping in the shelter I made for him. The old warming pad was dying, so I installed a new one that is at 65° when he's off it and gets up to 80° when he's sleeping on it, so he's pretty comfy...

We've had rain which has created a thick enough crust that Fake Jake can walk on it, so I went out and made sure there's no bird feed left out in the open to lure birds for him to attack...

So... all-in-all he's not doing bad at all. I still worry about there being no heat from above when he sleeps, and I know the cold will be harder on him as he gets older, so I think for next winter I will build something to address that. Maybe even find a way to build a caged run in my garage that he can enter that would make sure he doesn't get run over? I dunno. I've got the whole summer to think about it!

Even though Jake and Jenny can't really go anywhere outside the house except the catio, they are still seem restless and feeling trapped because out every window is nothing but snow. Every once in a while they will go out and meow at it just because... but, for their sakes, I'm anxious for Spring to arrive.

And for my sake.

With each passing day, it seems as though my cats are looking more and more like they want to eat me...

It's The Shining all over again.

And now I leave you with... KITTENS! (here's a link if TikTok is being a dick)...

Times like this I feel like I need another cat.

This morning while I was working I decided to have New Carl vacuum the house. But first I had to pick up a few things, including the big cardboard box that my cats have been playing in this past week off-and-on. I set it on the sofa and almost immediately Jenny climbed up and jumped inside it. Then she wanted to see out... went towards the side that was on the edge of the couch and... well... there she went. It was hysterical. It started so slowly. She realized she was moving, her little ears laid back flat, her eyes opened wide, and you could see she was trying to process what was happening. Just before the box hit the floor, she hopped out... nearly landing on Jake who walked in to see what the ruckus was about. She was not happy.

My cats are growing more different from each other.

When I am on a Zoom call, Jenny comes walking up meowing and wants to be petted. Then she'll sit and stare at me until my call is over...

Jake waits too... but from a safer distance...

Jenny comes in after breakfast and wants to nap next to me, but she insists on belly rubs while she falls asleep...

Jake just wants to curl up next to me and fall immediately asleep...

In other cat news, Jenny spotted some birds outside and went running to the catio at top speed. They eventually flew off, and she laid there waiting for them to come back, which must have been cold with her belly on the frozen concrete...

Eventually she gave up and came inside so she could thaw out on a warming pad.

And lastly, I leave you with this. Kinda reminds me of how Jenny used to plop down and watch TV with me... completely absorbed by what was happening on the screen...

Jake has never really been into television. No idea why.

Tonight while I was waiting for my dinner to get out of the oven, I glanced into the kitchen after I heard Jake and Jenny romping around in that direction. To my horror, I saw Jake on top of the kitchen counter. This is exceedingly rare. The only thing I will (gently) yell at my cats for is to get off the counters. After a couple years, they finally get the message, and just don't do it. I have a motion alert from my cameras that tells me when they've been up there so I know to sanitize and steam clean them... but it hasn't gone of in months. Probably even a year now.

So seeing Jake up there was pretty shocking.

And after I (gently) yelled at him to get down twice (I don't ever scream at my cats... just raising my voice a little is enough for them to get the message), I was disappointed that he was still up there.

So I walk into the kitchen to shoo him down and...

...it wasn't Jake. I left my backpack on the counter. Which is apparently Jake-shaped from a distance.

And now I felt bad, so I found him cowering in the guest bedroom and told him how sorry I was and gave him lots of pets so he would know that I wasn't mad at him. I was mad at me, apparently.

I ordered some things from Amazon that I couldn't get locally. It all came in a nice big box with a long string of packing pillows, so I was sure to set it out for the cats. They both love a nice-sized box filled with packing pillows. Jake just likes to stand around in there looking at everything. Jenny will jump in and smack all the pillows around and roll around like a maniac. It's adorable. The excitement usually wears off after a few days but, in the meanwhile, something new to do that's indoors where it's warm! They go out in the catio from time to time, but never for more than a few minutes now that the temperature gets below freezing.

A box. Best toy money can buy!

Christmas pushed by Saturday and Bullet Sunday posts... again this week.

Today's drive over the pass to get home was a little better than my drive over on Thursday. About 50% less terrifying maybe? Though there were still plenty of emergency vehicles and ambulances blowing past me in both directions thanks to numerous asshole drivers out there driving like maniacs... going way too fast for conditions and spinning out of control.

Still... kinda pretty though...

The cats were very happy to have me home. Mostly because I decided to give them some treats to hold them over until dinner. But which one? I currently have six different flavors...

I ended up going with Salmon, which is their favorite I think. It's the least I can do since I abandoned them for the past three nights.

On a most decidedly sad day for me (my mom's birthday) my cats have been working overtime to distract me. They've been chasing each other around the house ALL. MORNING. NOW. and it's driving me a little crazy. No idea what's gotten into them, but I'm glad they're getting their exercise in, I guess. And so it's Caturday a day late today.

Thanks to my electric blanket, both cats are spending any time I'm working in bed (the warmest spot in the house) laying next to me. Jenny, who is usually majorly annoyed when Jake intrudes on our morning time seemed all to happy to have one more warm body around. Even though Jake literally walked over her to lay down...

Jenny is unhappy, however, when Jake arrives first...

Jenny gets upset a lot this time of year. She's very upset when I am taking a Zoom call instead of working in bed, for example. Fortunately, she's just fine with it is I'm giving her some attention while I Zoom...

Amazing how Jenny's adorable little sour face still hasn't changed after six years...

Just like Jake's appetite hasn't changed. He still investigates every single meal I make... even if he just finished eating minute before...

Oh well. Consistency is a good thing when it comes to cats, I suppose.

Since Jenny was little, she's always brushed up against my leg as I put her food down... like she's thanking me or something. Jake is too busy scarfing his meal to thank me, but I'm sure he's grateful. Last night my phone fell out of my pocket as I was bending over and it scared her so bad that she ran off and hid. Eventually she came back to eat, but this morning at breakfast she kept her distance until I left. I felt pretty bad about it and was wondering if she'd ever trust me again. But then tonight she was back to rubbing up against me, so I guess she's forgotten about the Friday Dinner Disaster.

Or not?

   
And before I go... here's a gem to make your holiday brighter! (here's a link in case TikTok is being a dick)...

Yeah, I think we're done here.

Believe it or not, Jake and Jenny's sixth birthday is this coming Monday!

Two kittens I got to keep my mom occupied while I was at work have become more of a fixture in my home than my furniture! It seems like just yesterday that I brought them home from the shelter... little confused and terrified balls of fuzz that hid under the couch for weeks... only coming out to eat after we'd gone to bed.

But eventually...

Now they're still terrified of strangers... and sometimes terrified of me... but they own the place, and they know it. Just look at the adorable little assholes that run my life...

I wouldn't have it any other way. Happy birthday!

As I've mentioned several times now... Jake can't meow. He can cry, but any attempt to meow just ends up in a squeak or a squawk. I always react as if he just meowed his head off because I don't want for him to feel bad, but sometimes it's pretty soft and difficult to hear, so I've trained myself to listen for it.

Unlike Jenny, who has an entire menu of meows to choose from. An impatient meow is different from an excited meow is different from an upset meow is different from an angry meow is different from a frustrated meow. And I've gotten to the point where I can apply context and understand exactly what the issue is baed on which meow I get.

But Jenny doesn't meow a lot. Sometimes she'll go for days... maybe even weeks.

Not so with Jake.

My little guy, if he could meow, would be meowing several times a day.

Most of his squeaks-that-would-be-meows are just getting my attention. Squeaks to let me know tha the dinner alarm is going off (in case I didn't hear it). Squeaks to let me know that he wants attention as I walk by. Squeaks to greet me when I walk up to him. Squeaks to greet me when I walk into a room.

It's actually kinda adorable.

Which is nothing new, because I think that most everything my cats do is adorable.

Jake and Jenny finally seem to be adjusting to the end of Daylight Saving Time. There's a bit more harmony... a lot less fighting, hissing, and chasing. On the contrary, they actually seem to be fine with each other.

When I checked in on them yesterday afternoon, THEY WERE GIVING EACH OTHER BATHS AND SLEEPING ON MY BED NEXT TO EACH OTHER! I stopped making my bed ages ago because Jake likes having a berm to rest up against, and now I know that Jenny does as well...

Jenny has also stopped running off with Mufasa (as often), which makes me a lot less worried about leaving for work. It's more than a little heartbreaking looking at the security cameras and seeing Jake wandering around crying because he can't find his toy lion.

Lately I've been setting Mufasa at the bottom of the stairs when I run across him so that when Jake wants it, he will have a place to start looking...

Because if I were to just give it to him every time I find it, he'll just set it down and forget where he put it... so this seems a smarter way to go.

Though, as with most things to do with cats, being smarter isn't always the advantage you'd think it would be.