Yeah, yeah, it's Friday and I'm two days early... but I can't mess up my end-of-year lists, so... Bullet Sunday starts now...
• Box! Ooh... look... it's the day after Christmas!
Assuming you celebrate that kind of thing.
• Monkeymedic! When a monkey was badly shocked by an electrical line, a monkey friend did their best to revive him...
Monkey buddies for life!
• Land! One of the gifts from Cards Against Humanity's Ten Days or Whatever of Kwanzaa ended up being one square foot of an island in Maine that they renamed Hawaii 2. My piece is here...
Looks like I'm going to have to see if there's a way to get there for my next trip to Maine!
• Cute! There's an article titled 25 of The Cutest Parenting Moments In The Animal Kingdom that's totally worth a look. Though I'd say a photo I took when I was at Mana Pools in Africa of two elephants teaching a baby elephant how to wash grass is just as cute as any of them...
And a photo I took of a mother lion giving her reluctant cub a bath when I was at Hwange National Park is equally sweet...
Doesn't get much more adorable than nature.
• Horrifying! And now for something that's the exact opposite of cute. I was playing Godus (quite a trick when the pile of crap crashes all the time) when a rival tribe, the Astari, started having a celebration. If the celebration makes their people happier than my people, some of my people will defect. I didn't want this to happen, so I used my god powers to call down a meteor strike. I was hoping if I busted some of their buildings they wouldn't be quite so happy. Unexpectedly, all hell broke loose. Before I knew it, all the buildings... and all the little people... were on fire...
The whole scene was just awful, and I felt terrible all day for the horrific destruction I unleashed. I was going to call down some rain to extinguish everything, but the population plummeted to zero and the entire tribe was gone. Guess this is what happens when people try to play god.
• Quest! I'm a bit obsessed with Questlove, best known as co-founder and lead drummer for The Roots (the house band on The Tonight Show with Jimmy Fallon). He absolutely mesmerizes me with his musical talent... especially when he sits in on drums with a guest band at the last minute (always flawlessly). He can play drums on A.N.Y.T.H.I.N.G. Despite being a fan, I never knew he had a memoir out until last week when I discovered... quite by accident... the book "Mo' Meta Blues." It is fantastic. The guy is even more brilliant than I imagined. Highly recommend checking it out...
If you need convincing, here's a terrific excerpt over at Salon.
• ASSHOLERY! One of my favorite internet services is DropBox. It's a storage space in the cloud that allows me to share files and keep my work handy no matter where I am or which computer I'm using. I've been paying for DropBox space for years, and have come to rely on its ease and convenience. At least I did until the last update when the fucking assholes moved the buttons to open the DropBox folder and open the DropBox website... replacing them with a "Pro" button...
And since I am so accustomed to where the buttons used to be, I'm forever accidentally clicking on that stupid-ass "Pro" button, opening up their idiotic "PAY US MORE FUCKING MONEY" website which I DON'T WANT. And I am absolutely livid. First DropBox trains everybody where to click to get what they need... then they trick you into clicking on an ad? terrific way to treat your customers.
UPDATE: I do have a "Pro" account that doesn't expire until April 2015 and has PLENTY of space available. So I have no idea why I am being told I have to go Pro Pro?
And... that's the last Bullet Sunday of 2014!
Beautiful. Magical.
Big Hero 6 is a movie well worth a look.
And, if you're a fan of the film like me, I'd recommend checking out the art book. Disney usually does a great job on these, but this is above and beyond...
If ever there was a reason to celebrate Disney buying out Marvel Comics, this would be it. Hopefully this isn't the last animation collaboration we'll see.
I miss reading. I used to read a lot. Like... really a lot.
I'd easily tear through 25 books a year, and it wasn't unheard of to do double that. I'm a fairly quick reader, so a book a week is a piece of cake if the material isn't too challenging (Foucault's Pendulum by Umberto Eco was insane and took over a month to get through).
But then stuff started getting in the way.
Video games got more complex and time consuming.
Work got more and more involved.
Social media became a time-suck of epic proportions.
Now-a-days the only time I get to read is when I travel, and even that's diminishing. I'm either catching up with movies on my iPad, using in-flight wi-fi, or playing with my Nintendo 3DS. For a while I thought audio-books were a way to keep "reading" in my life, but so few books are enjoyable to me that way (David Sedaris, for example, is better on audio-book, but good sci-fi is almost impossible for me to get through).
In 2013 I read three books.
Pathetic.
And so I've set a goal for myself to read six books in 2014.
Wish me luck.
This is my second year trying to put together a list of my favorite comic books, which isn't easy given that I just don't read many comics any more (my reading has taken a dive now that "The New 52" has kind of died down). But I still love comic books, so it's important to me to put some good books out there in the hopes that more people will support them.
As always, I'm doing most of my reading digitally on my Retina Display iPad, because I just don't have room to store any more comics. Comixology makes it so simple... and they regularly have sales that actually make comic books affordable. So here we go...
THE TWELVE BEST...
#1 Hawkeye.
How in the heck can a non-Batman book take the top spot in my list of 2013 favorites? When it's this tale of continuing brilliance by Matt Fraction and David Aja. It's just the whole package. Fantastic writing infused with enough action and humor to keep the pages blowing by... paired with some beautiful Giffen-esque art that services the story flawlessly. If I had to point to one thing that pushed this series over the edge for me, it would have to be issue #11. This one issue which... stay with me here... was told entirely from the perspective of Hawkeye's dog, illustrates beautifully just what makes Hawkeye the best book going in 2013.
#2 Batman.
My favorite comic book character of all time continues to chug along with some of the best Batman stories ever in his signature book. While the title has been a bit uneven compared to 2012, Scott Snyder still knows what makes Batman tick, and Greg Capullo still knows how to thrill with his jaw-dropping art. With "Death of the Family" wrapping up at the start of the year, I was wondering what could possibly come next... the answer? A prequel once again retreading Batman's origins? Really? And yet "Zero Year" kept things entertaining for the rest of the year.
#3 Jupiter's Legacy
This book was hyped as "The Comic Event of 2013," which would normally cause me to roll my eyes and move on. But it's by Mark Millar and Frank Quitely, so you couldn't help but take the buzz seriously. Yes, the book is basically a coat of fresh paint slapped on The Authority which has been fused with Watchmen-esque elements and injected with high Americana... but it's a really good paint job. The story is kind of a Greek Titans / Greek Gods situation, where an older generation of super-heroes are having to deal with the emergence of their super-powered offspring. There's only been three issues released, but you can already tell that Millar is building up to something really special.
#4 Batman, Incorporated
My number 4 from last year is my number 4 again this year... even though the title was canceled mid-year at issue #13. The reason is simple... Grant Morrison kept on doing what he was doing right up until the bitter end, and it worked beautifully. Even when he killed Damian Wayne, which was probably my favorite Robin ever. It's still a bit of a shock that there's no Morrison Batman to be had any more.
#5 Wonder Woman
Still love the book. Probably even more than I did last year, even though it was in the No. 5 spot then as well. What Azzarello and Chiang are doing is taking Greek mythology to epic heights which, given how epic Greek myths already are, is pretty frickin' spectacular. Gods, monsters, and surprises permeate Wonder Woman, and with every issue I have to check my disbelief that somebody isn't building a movie franchise for her. Screw the upcoming "Batman/Superman" cameo... everything you need for an amazing film is right here.
#6 The Sandman: Overture
More Gaiman Sandman? Yes please. And while the story for this mini-series isn't up to the lofty standards of the original book, it's absolutely the most beautiful presentation of the character I've ever seen thanks to the jaw-dropping art of J.H. Williams III. And what else is there to say? It's Sandman.
#7 Chew
This is one of those titles I've enjoyed for a while... but it's finally gotten to the point where it's essential reading material. Police detective Tony Chu has the unique ability to get psychic impressions from objects he consumes. Including people. Which means he's got an inside-edge in solving murders... all he has to do is start chowing down on the corpse. But the title is so much more than that, and very much worth your valuable time.
#8 FF.
Okay... okay... even though it was written by Matt Fraction and drawn by the incomparable Mike Allred, the wacky premise behind a substitute Fantastic Four in FF was just too much for me (a woman in a Thing-suit named "Miss Thing? Ugh). Until Marvel gave away the first issue for free and I actually read it. I should have known better. I should have given the creative team a chance. Because Fraction (who writes my #1 book, Hawkeye) is at his most unique right here, and Allred is Allred... churning out his magical art page by page. The sheer surprise of how much I enjoy this book should probably rate it higher on my list, but I've settled in and am "just" loving it now.
#9 Superman Unchained.
What happens when Scott Snyder sneaks away from his awesome Batman book to dip his toe in the Superman universe? Well, some pretty great stuff, as it turns out. And it doesn't hurt that he has Jim Lee onboard to illustrate the thing. In many ways, Unchained, should have been the title that anchored "The New 52" all along... it's just so much more streamlined and entertaining that what we've been getting from the launch titles.
#10 Adventure Time.
Yes. All the things that make the Adventure Time cartoon so awesome are perfectly translated to a comic book series. If you love the wacky insanity that defines every episode of the show, this book is a must-read. And if you don't love the cartoon, then you don't love life. Get onboard, will you?
#11 Invincible
Robert Kirkman continues to pump out issue after issue of the most consistent quality super-hero book there is. And even with all the storyline ups-and-downs of 2013, it was still a book I was anxious to read every month. If you want to rediscover what makes super-hero comics such an enduring genre, this is probably the best place to start.
#12 The Wake
What does Scott Snyder do when he's not crafting some of the best Batman and Superman stories running? Oh... he dabbles in a series that leaves the super-heroics behind with The Wake, a 10-part series that explores the ocean depths... with a survival horror twist that's a mind-bogglingly good read. Half the fun of this series is speculating where it's all leading to... the other half is just grabbing hold and enjoying the ride.
ALSO WORTH LOOKING AT...
Lazarus
Science fiction cut with politics cut with action... all of which rolls together in a surprisingly fresh way. In this book, the super-wealthy own the world, but the world is not enough, and epic battles between families is only survivable by genetically-engineered protectors.
Indestructible Hulk #6-8
Walt Simonson returns to Thor... in the pages of Indestructible Hulk? Wha-?!? But, yes, it's true. Mr. Simonson takes on the art chores for Mark Waid and blows the doors off, much as you'd expect he would. As if that weren't enough, the storyline was pretty darn entertaining.
East of West
I was late coming to this series because Westerns are not my thing... but then the praise-laden reviews started rolling in, and I was compelled to take a look. More like a "Sci-Fi Western," Jonathan Hickman's East of West is a battle between the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse at the end of the world... with Death as mankind's only hope. Really good writing in an imaginative work that's worth checking out.
Today would have been the 61st birthday of one of my all-time favorite authors, Douglas Adams.
Sadly, he died twelve years ago, leaving a void in the universe where his wit, humor, and astounding talent once resided. Best known as the author of Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, he was also a big supporter of the environment and tireless advocate for wildlife conservation... in particular those animals which are most threatened. One of his lesser-known works, Last Chance to See, is among my most favorite books, and documented Adams' attempts to see some of the world's most endangered animals... perhaps for the very last time.
Today Google came up with a Google Doodle in his honor...
It features his most famous phrase "Don't Panic" from his most famous work and it has been words I've tried to live by for decades.
I've met the man at book readings three times. Each time I was allowed to get an item autographed, and these pieces are among my most treasured possessions...
The credit card form was chosen very carefully, as I wanted something unique that he probably hadn't autographed very many times. As I handed it to him, he said "Well this is a first!" as he signed it, and then told me that if I got the credit card approved with his name on it, to please restrain myself when using it.
My favorite memory of Mr. Adams was at a reading for one of his books... I'm thinking perhaps Mostly Harmless, but it could have been The Long Dark Tea-Time of the Soul. Anyway, at this particular reading he had a sign language interpreter that he decided to torture for his audience's amusement. All of a sudden he'd read a paragraph impossibly fast, then put the book down and stare at the interpreter while looking at his watch and tapping his foot as he waited for her to catch up. Later in the reading he got to a passage where the character had an impossibly long and complex name (akin to Hitchhiker's "Slartibartfast"). After saying it, he immediately glanced wryly at the poor girl so he could watch her struggle to spell out the name. It was all in good fun, and the interpreter got a hug at the end, which was just the sort of wonderful thing you expect from Douglas Adams.
I cherish everything he wrote, and have read his books many times over. But oh how I wish he had lived to tell more stories. Just as it always goes, you can never get enough of the good things in life.
Happiest of birthdays to you, Mr. Adams.
One of my all-time favorite books from when I was a kid was Curious George Goes to the Hospital.
Recently I was needing to add a cheap item to my order to push my order total above the FREE SHIPPING threshold. For some reason I remembered this Curious George book, so I ordered a copy.
I am happy to say that it totally holds up, even after all this time. If, for no other reason, than to see Curious George get high on ether fumes (turns out this is from an earlier George book, sorry!).
My review on GoodReads...
★★★★★
After re-reading Curious George Goes to the Hospital I am convinced that it is the peak of literary perfection, unmatched by any other human accomplishment. The entire spectrum of drama is fully represented in a tale so filled with wonder and delight as to make all other books redundant. The fact that the story's wealth of knowledge and inspiration is so remarkably accessible to persons of most any age is surely a testament to the unarguable brilliance of Margret & H.A. Rey. I loathe to attribute something as mundane as a "Star Rating" to such a transcendentally significant work which redefines the boundaries of human/primate existence, and so eloquently conveys the folly and ultimate triumph of monkeykind... but if forced to do so under the GoodReads review standard, I offer TWENTY-SIX STARS (of which only five are be visible for some reason). You owe it to yourself... nay, you owe it to ALL HUMANITY... to read this literary masterwork and thrill to the sublime illustrated artistic triumphs which accompany it. Curious George Goes to the Hospital is, quite simply, the most profoundly perfect book ever created, and shall undoubtedly remain so until the end of time.
Obviously, I give the book my highest possible recommendation. If you haven't read it yet, I'd get on that.
Since I have never even attended a "zine show" I'm a little nervous about exhibiting at the Portland Zine Symposium this weekend. Part of the problem has to do with a sentence out of the tabling guidelines...
"In order keep the Portland Zine Symposium focused on zines and to maintain the DIY spirit of the Portland Zine Symposium, at least 51% of merchandise at any table must be handmade zines and/or independently published materials."
Sure, THRICE Fiction is independently published... it's just Bob and myself... but we're hardly "Do It Yourself" when it comes to the actual production of the magazine. Digital copies are given away for free, but anything people want to physically purchase is professionally printed. So... the question becomes "Will we be welcomed with our slick printed magazines and books?" or "Will people stop by just to slap me in the face and set our table on fire?"
I honestly don't know.
So last Wednesday I went to Flickr and did a search for Portland Zine Symposium photos.
Oh crap.
It's just table after table of handmade books that looks like they were copied at Kinkos and stapled together in somebody's living room.
So now I've gone from being "a little worried" to being "a lot worried." I considered canceling, but I had already bought a non-refundable airline ticket and spent a lot of money printing a book to sell. "Oh well," I thought. "Guess I'll just show up and hope we're 'indy' enough that I don't get slapped and set on fire."
And then realized I don't want to risk getting slapped, so I decided to hand-make a zine instead (which is something Bob had suggested years ago... go figure).
This was easier said than done, as there wasn't time to hand-draw a new zine from scratch. Not knowing what else to do, I figured I'd just assemble some stuff from my blog and see how that went (which is something else Bob had suggested years ago... go figure). Ultimately I decided to make a zine filled with Bad Monkey cartoons. I figured since everybody loves monkeys, this was my best chance of not getting our table set on fire.
Then I spent the next couple nights cobbling together a zine. Then I ordered a booklet stapler and a stack-cutter. Then I printed copies (in color, because I'm That Guy). Then I spent the next couple nights saddle-stitch stapling everything together. My stack-cutter never showed up, so today I had to go bother a print shop to trim my books for me.
And so now I have a hand-made zine for our table...
To make them seem more "hand-made," I worked hard to get them looking beat up and aged. All the interior pages are yellowed and textured. The cover has wear and tear marks printed on it. Then I took each copy and rubbed it on a gem cutter's cloth to add a little bit of scuff. They're as hand-made as I can get, given the time constraints I'm under...
Overall, the experience of making this zine sucked. And I'm still not 100% convinced that the DaveToons will even make sense out of the context of my blog. Oh well (again).
But... it definitely has me anxious to try making more zines in the future. With more time and less anxiety, it seems like this kind of thing would actually be something fun to do!
In the meanwhile, everybody cross their fingers that my first zine show doesn't end up with my getting slapped and a visit from the fire department...
Back in April, I wrote about a Kickstarter project that I desperately wanted funded...
"The holy grail for Stanley Kubrick fans (outside his movies, obviously) is a copy of a book called Full Metal Jacket Diary by Matthew Modine, who was an actor in the film. The reason it's such a big deal is twofold...
I was over the moon when the project was successfully funded.
Today the app was finally released. And it doesn't suck...
The menu system is fantastic, and disappears when not needed.
The photos change as you scroll the text, which you can have author/actor Matthew Modine read to you.
All the amazing photos have been scanned at hi-resolution and can be zoomed in on at any time.
On the contrary, it is a stunning app. Not only do you get the entirety of the original diary book, but you get complete audio narration by author Matthew Modine. All of which means nothing if the app is bad and hard to use... but it isn't. This project was a labor of love through and through and it shows. Everything is really well thought out... and optimized for Retina Display, which means if looks fantastic.
If you have any interest in film and want some insight into the mind of a true artist of the medium... or you're a fan of Full Metal Jacket... or you're a fan of Kubrick... or you just want to see the kind of apps that iPad was made for... click here to go get a copy. It's just $14.95, and worth every penny.
I was very sad indeed to learn that beloved children's author Donald J. Sobol has died. When I was a kid, I was positively obsessed with his Encyclopedia Brown books... so much so that I would re-read them over and over again, even though I already knew how the stories would end. I pretty much had to, because there were less than a dozen of them at the time. I also remember reading Sobol's Two-Minute Mysteries, but I think there were only two of those books.
Even after outgrowing Encyclopedia Brown, Boy Detective, I would still revisit the books on occasion... like when I saw them in the library or something. I think the last one I read was just two years ago. Because they're just that entertaining...
And orange. So very, very orange.
The drive back home this morning was relatively uneventful.
If you discount all the screaming I did when people were driving in the passing lane... WHILE DRIVING TEN MILES UNDER THE SPEED LIMIT WITHOUT PASSING ANYBODY! Could not possibly explain in mere words how badly that pisses me off.
What I need now is a chocolate chip cookie...
People offer to send me free things all the time in the hopes that I'll review their stuff on my blog. I always say "no" because if somebody gives me something, then I feel obligated to say something nice even when it's a lie. Sure it means I have to pay for crap that I could get for zero dollars, but at least then I can say what I really feel.
So when my blogging pal Rob "Diesel" Kroese said he wanted to send me a preview copy of his new book, Mercury Rises, I was torn. On one hand, I really liked his first book, and so I'd probably like the sequel too. But, on the other hand sequels can be bad, so what if it sucks ass like REVENGE OF THE NERDS II: NERDS IN PARADISE? What then?
I'll tell you what.
First you make a donation to my favorite charity Doctors Without Borders in Rob Kroese's name so you don't feel bad about what you're saying about his book...
Then you sit down and write a review on your blog because you promised you would.
Mercury Rises is a story about rebel FBI agent Bruce Willis protecting some autistic kid who has unwittingly discovered the key to cracking a top-secret government code. Because of this, the government wants him dead, and only Bruce Willis can save him. Formulaic absurdity ensues. About the only bright spot in this entire mess of a book is villain Alec Baldwin, who manages to deliver some of the cheesiest dialog ever written in a way that makes you not quite want to kill yourself. Which is about the best thing I can say about Mercury Rises.
What I want to know is what Kroese was thinking. I mean, his first book, Mercury Falls, had memorable characters, witty dialogue, and some genuinely funny situations. Why did he jettison all that this time? I guess the pressure of writing a sequel to a successful book was more than Diesel could take, so he traded in his unique and humorous voice for big budget stars and a by-the-numbers action-thriller that fails to deliver. Overall, a big disappointment.
If you're a die-hard (heh) Bruce Willis fan, this might be worth a look. Otherwise I'd skip it.
UPDATE! Umm... it was just pointed out to me that I was confusing Rob's book Mercury Rises with the film Mercury Rising. I could say this is my fault, but honestly... it's easy to see how I would get the two mixed up. Quick suggestion to Mr. Kroese... name your next book something more clever (like Mercury Rises: Nerds in Paradise or Mercury Rises: The Phantom Menace or Weekend at
Anyway, here's me reviewing the BOOK version of Mercury Rises...
It's a pretty darn good read.
IF you've read the original book Mercury Falls. Otherwise, the sequel won't make much sense because there's noooooo hand-holding here. The story picks up right after the original with absolutely no recap or explanation as to what's going on.
But if you HAVE read Mercury Falls, then you're in for a treat, because The Apocalypse is back on and only rogue angel Mercury and recently-out-of-work reporter Christine Temetri can save the world. Again! Along the way we get a peek into the distant past with the origins of Tiamet's Apocalyptic scheming and even more of Kroese's crazy characters and outlandish situations. But past, present, or possible future, it's all wrapped up in the same witty, pop-culture-infused trappings that I enjoyed the first time around.
In more ways than one, Mercury Rises is a more challenging read than the first book. There's a lot going on, a lot to process, and a lot to wade through as the plot moves along. I kind of appreciate this, because it gives me something interesting to latch onto now that the "newness" of Mercury and his heavenly bureaucracy has worn off. But you do have to prepare yourself for some uninterrupted reading time to fully appreciate where the story is taking you. Try to read this one during commercial breaks in Dancing with the Stars and you're in for a tough time of it. Still, it's worth the effort.
I'm giving Mercury Rises ★★★★☆. If you enjoyed Mercury Falls (★★★★★), then you'll probably enjoy the sequel as well. It's available in paperback by following this link to Amazon (or you can buy it for a mere $2.99 by getting the Kindle Edition).
And now a warning.
SHIT! Just a second...
About the only thing I didn't like about Mercury Rises is that it's not complete. It is, in fact, a cliffhanger set-up for the third book, Mercury Rests.
I really, really hate it when this happens.
What if Diesel dies before he can finish the tale? What if Mercury Rises only sells five copies and the publisher doesn't want to print the sequel? What if the ACTUAL APOCALYPSE happens before the third book is released? What if I die and never get to find out how the story ends?
A part of me wants to say the same thing I say whenever I talk about a book with a cliffhanger "ending"... wait until the actual ending is released before you buy it so you can be sure you'll be able to read the complete story. But, in this case, that would be a shame. Mercury Falls is one of those books that leaves you wanting more. Well, here it is. If, like me, you've been waiting... I begrudgingly say take a chance and pick up a copy.
Mercury willing, the grand finale of the trilogy will find its way to us soon enough.
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