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The Fake is the Thing

Posted on March 9th, 2026

Dave!I honestly don't understand why the fuck people concern themselves with what other people are eating. Or, even worse, condemn people for their choices. A lot of times this comes down to "food influencers" shaming everybody for content. Telling people that their cheaper foods are garbage and they should be eating expensive organic stuff instead. Whether people can afford it or not. Or, in the case of truly fucking shitty "food influencers" (like the Queen of Bullshit Misinformation, "Food Babe" Vani Hari) dishing outright misinformation about food, and condemning methods of food production which they deems "bad" even though science may not support the claim. But influencers doesn't give a fuck. All they care about is the clicks for cash.

In my case, I simply don't want to kill animals to eat. Period. That's what guides my dietary choices. And, lucky for me, food options exist which help me achieve my goal. And, much to my joy, these options are getting more versatile, convenient, and delicious all the time. I am currently hopelessly addicted to Beyond Stack Burgers. I would eat them morning, noon, and night if the coconut oil content didn't cause me digestion woes. So instead I just eat them morning and night.

And, yes, I know what the fuck is in it. The ingredients are right on the package, so I don't need some shitty "influencer" to read them to me: Water, Pea Protein, Canola Oil, Refined Coconut Oil, Rice Protein, Natural Flavors, 2% or less of Methylcellulose, Potato Protein, Apple Extract, Salt, Pomegranate Concentrate, Vinegar, Lemon Juice Concentrate, Potassium Salt, Dextrose, Spices, Faba Bean Protein, Vitamins and Minerals (Zinc Sulfate, Niacinamide [Vitamin B3], Pyridoxine Hydrochloride [Vitamin B6], Cyanocobalamin [Vitamin B12], Calcium Pantothenate [Vitamin B5]), Vegetable Juice Color (with Beet).

And, yes, I know what the fuck the nutrition values are. That's printed right on the package too. The only problematic values to me are saturated fat (from the coconut oil) and the sodium (260mg).

But God-forbid I be allowed to make decisions for myself without somebody stepping in to tell me where I'm going wrong.

Lately I've been inundated with videos about why plant-based meats have "failed."

Most of it is the shitty fucking influencer brigade, praising people for finally coming to their senses by dropping horribly "unhealthy" fake meats and going back to real meat (mad cow, cancerous tumors, feces, steroids, and all). Because nothing screams "health" than having cow shit in your hamburger, I guess.

But the real story is more nuanced and interesting than that. Which is where actual journalism comes into play... like this story from Business Insider...

I'm glad they didn't leave out the fact that real meat is heavily subsidized by the government while plant-base "meat" is mostly left to fend for itself. This, coupled with the economics of scale, put fake "meat" at a disadvantage compared to the slaughterhouses. I'm happy to drive a (relatively) cheap car so I can afford my chosen diet (among other things), but a lot of people aren't. Though given the current high price of food, the extra money is a drop in the bucket compared to the total grocery bill which is hurting vegetarians and carnivores alike.

If "food influencers" truly gave a shit about people's well-being, they'd put their energy into advocating being able to afford food in the first place.

But that doesn't pay as well, so here we are.

   

Food Shaming for Fun!

Posted on February 5th, 2024

Dave!Food-shaming "influencers" can fuck all the way off.

Because what they're about has absolutely nothing to do with wanting people to eat healthier. It's all about making people feel bad about what they're eating... regardless of WHY they're eating what they're eating.

Especially "influencers" like this nightmare who honestly thinks that they're doing something with their shitty condescending attitude...


I've covered up this "influencer" because I don't mean to be sending any hate their way...
this is just one example of a huge problem that I picked to illustrate my point.

"This is not food." YES IT IS. It's not the healthiest food, but it's food. And if you'e working three jobs to get by and the only thing you can afford and have time to eat for breakfast is an Egg McMuffin and a McHashbrowns THAT'S OKAY. If you have difficulty cooking for whatever reason and this is what you can manage? THAT'S OKAY. If you don't have a kitchen available to cook food? THAT'S OKAY. Eat what you can eat and don't let people who don't care about you shit all over you for it.

"Imma keep saying it until y'all hear me!" Okay, I heard you. Now if I tell you that I don't give a shit about your food-shaming rhetoric, will you leave people alone? Because everybody already knows this. It's not news. Nobody eats at McDonald's for its health benefits. And your treating people who eat McHashbrowns like they're stupid and don't know any better just makes you a horrendous piece of shit.

If you want to suggest a way for people to eat healthier and peddle it to people who are looking for that information content, then go right ahead. But food shaming makes me crazy because the gall it takes is just beyond the pale.

Unless you are going to pay to have healthier food made available which people can afford... and have access to... and fits their particular situation...

FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, JUST SHUT. THE. FUCK. UP!!!

Seriously. Go eat a head of lettuce and just fuck off already.

   

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