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Godliness

Posted on Tuesday, August 3rd, 2010

Dave!Reading back through my blog entries these past couple weeks, I'm reminded just how unlucky a traveler I am. Anything that could possibly go wrong, usually does go wrong. Delayed flights? Check. Missed flights? Check. Cancelled flights? Check. Lost luggage? Check. Vomiting co-passengers? Check. Whatever horrible thing you can think of? Check. Been there, done that. Many times.

Why me?

But through all the pain and suffering, at least I could take solace in the knowledge that those two crazy kids Bristol Palin and Levi Johnston finally got back together and will be married at last!

Bristol Palin and Levi Johnson on US Magazine

But then... BLAM! Just minutes later, they're separated again and the wedding has been called off!

Why me?

Oh well. At least I still have the marriage of Herpes Simplex One and Herpes Simplex Two to reignite my faith in humanity and maintain my peace and happiness in the face of adversity!

Spencer (Herpes Simplex One) and Heidi (Herpes Simplex Two)

What? What's that?

Son of a bitch! Not Spencer and Heidi too?!?

Why me?

What have I done to deserve this?

After my non-stop battle with misfortune, I have come to the only possible conclusion: God is totally messing with me...

DAVETOON: God Says

I wish He would unleash His "Divine Love" on somebody else for a while.

P.S. Any resemblance between myself and The Almighty is purely intentional.

   
In other non-theological news... why is it that every company seems to have shitty customer service anymore?

For reasons unknown, I started receiving paper bills in the mail from Charter Cable a couple months ago. It's a mystery because I set up automated payments and paperless billing. Usually, I just ignore the statements when they arrive, but thought I'd open the one that wasn't as thick as a usual bill. Turns out it's a past due notice. So I call to find out what the hell is going wrong, and am told that they don't know... sometimes automated payments don't go through. But they verify my account is correct and volunteer to credit the late fee on my next bill (apparently they can't credit on the bill they fucked up on)... but only IF I pay my late balance immediately.

Except I can't pay for their screw-up with the service rep I'm already on the phone with unless I pay $1.99 fee.

Yes, that's right. THEY fuck up and I have to pay for it.

Except I'd rather never watch television again than pay for their bullshit, so I use their crappy automated system.

I'd use their website, but it won't let me login.

I'm guessing God has a part-time job on the web development team at Charter Cable.

What other possible conclusion could there be?

Tags: , ,
Categories: DaveLife 2010, DaveToons 2010Click To It: Permalink
   

Comments

  1. muskrat says:

    Your conclusions may have been rushed a bit, but they seem fairly sound nonetheless.

  2. Sybil Law says:

    I was JUST ranting yesterday about shitty customer service, so in order to not have my head explode all over again, I will simply say…
    pudding.

  3. Wow. That Charter Cable thing is ridiculous! And I’m glad Heidi & Spencer are splitting. She had all kinds of plastic surgery for him and changed a lot for him, plus he isolated her from her family. I’m pretty sure they are both unstable and bad for each other. Yes, I watch The Hills. Go ahead and judge. You already know I like some really crap-ass shows.

  4. Now I lay me down to sleep,
    I pray the Dave my soul to keep;
    if I die before I wake,
    I pray for Dave my soul to take.

    :)

  5. kapgar says:

    Bristol and Levi dated, had a kid, broke up, got back together, got engaged, broke up, got back together, got re-engaged, broke up…

    Are they 10 years old?

    BTW, this post was the first I’d heard of them breaking up. You’re my TMZ.

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