Blogography Logo
spacer

  Home  

Sidewalk

Posted on Saturday, January 30th, 2010

Dave!So there I was, minding my own business as I was walking to the mini-mart, when the woman walking ahead of me unknowingly dropped her vagina on the sidewalk.

This was surprising for a number of reasons... foremost of which was her wearing a mini-skirt in the middle of winter. Granted, the weather has been getting warmer lately, but it's still cold enough that there's snow on the ground. This made the whole mini-skirt thing pretty bizarre. Though, in the woman's defense, she was wearing boots and a jacket.

Neither of which were providing warmth to her crotch, which is why her vagina apparently froze and fell off...

DAVETOON: Bad Monkey finds a vagina on the sidewalk.

I was going to run up and tell her what happened, but I was too embarrassed.

Instead I carefully nudged it to the edge of the sidewalk with my foot so nobody would step in it. I figured eventually she's realize that something important had gone missing, then she'd retrace her steps to find her vagina there waiting for her.

A little colder, but no worse for wear.

   

I MEAN, SERIOUSLY! A MINI-SKIRT IN THE MIDDLE OF WINTER?!?

Though I suppose it could have been her work uniform. Maybe she's required to wear a mini-skirt as part of the dress code.

I wonder what kind of profession requires a mini-skirt dress code?

Tags:
Categories: DaveLife 2010, DaveToons 2010Click To It: Permalink
   

Comments

  1. Hilly says:

    So you didn’t take it home and play with it a little? What a shame.

  2. DutchBitch says:

    * SNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORTTTT *

    Thanks, now you’ve made me snort out my perfectly good English cuppatea!

    I don’t even wear a miniskirt in the house! (Well, not Lady Penelope’s house anyway, it’s fucking freezing in here e.v.e.r.y. time)

  3. Avitable says:

    That was rude of you. Every city has a Municipal Vaginal Lost & Found, and you should have taken it there.

  4. MIke says:

    When I worked as an HR manager (I don’t recommend it) there was one employee who just wanted to dress like a skank. (I never used those words, of course.) First I had to warn her about her BO, which left a foul aftertaste when she passed through a room. Onions or something a little too organic. She caused the office to come to a stand still when she announced she had stained her chair with her monthly period. ( This actually happened twice.) By her third month, she was commanding a lot of attention with her get-ups. Every day, she would push the limit a bit further. A top a little lower, the skirt a little bit higher until it looked like she was coming from a pole dancing competition- and the pole had won. Even she had to tie a sweater around her miniskirt one day because it was too high and crossing her legs became impossible or rather, pornographic. Unfortunately for me, my boss loved her and told her to ignore my warnings. Lovely.

  5. Sybil Law says:

    Hookers and skanks both need miniskirts all year ’round.
    Other than that, I have no clue.

  6. A. Lewis says:

    It probably just layed there with the rest of the crap on sidewalks — wheel covers, cigarette butts, chewed gum…oh, and a vagina too.

  7. B.E. Earl says:

    A simple “Excuse me, Miss…you dropped your kitty” would have worked.

    Meow.

  8. martymankins says:

    I hope you nudged it up on the grass so it felt more at home in a bushy area.

    Mini skirts work during the winter, mostly inside a dance club or bar. Maybe she was going from her car to a dance club. Of course, if the night is good for her, she’ll need to go back to get her vagina for later on.

  9. Tracy Lynn says:

    Whores. Whores wear mini skirts in winter. All year round, actually.

  10. claire says:

    Guess all the inappropriately clad dudes stick to the East coast. Seriously, this winter I’ve seen so many guys in SHORTS & t-shirts… maybe a hoodie, but certainly no jacket, when it was 30 degrees out tops, often much colder & windier. Effin’ crazy!

  11. Sarah says:

    I don’t understand people who wear miniskirts and shorts in winter. It’s freaking cold.

  12. Peggy Archer says:

    Hooters waitstaff? They have to wear skimpy clothes.

    Or, she could have just been on the prowl for fresh meat.

    Either way, having one’s vag freeze off is a terrible thing.

    There should be some sort of telethon.

  13. sizzle says:

    Maybe she had an accident and lost the other half of her skirt?

    Yeah. Not likely.

  14. Ben says:

    I love it when you see a girl (anytime of year) wearing a miniskirt that is so short things start winking at you.

Add a Comment

Blankatar!

   
I love comments! However, all comments are moderated, and won't appear until approved. Are you an abusive troll with nothing to contribute? Don't bother. Selling something? Don't bother. Spam linking? Don't bother.
PLEASE NOTE: My comment-spam protection requires JavaScript... if you have it turned off or are using a mobile device without JavaScript, commenting won't work. Sorry.




   


   


   
   
   
Your personal information is optional. Email addresses are never shown, and are only used by me if a public reply would be too personal or inappropriate here. The URL link to your web site or blog will be provided, so only fill this in if you want people to visit!



   

  Home  

spacer
Welcome:
Blogography is a place to learn and grow by exposing yourself to the mind of David Simmer II, a brilliant commentator on world events and popular culture (or so he claims).
Dave FAQ:
Frequently Asked Questions
Dave Flickr Gallery:
Dave Contact:
dave@blogography.com
Blogography Webfeeds:
Entries Feed
Comments Feed
Dave Social:
Blogography Tumblr
Blogography Instagram
Blogography on Pinterest
translate me
lost & found
Search Blogography:
thrice fiction
Thrice Fiction Magazine - March, 2011 - THE END
I'm co-founder of Thrice Fiction magazine. Come check us out!
free iphone app
Ask Dave iPhone App
Put Dave in your pocket with this FREE app for iPhone and iPod Touch. All life's answers await you with the Ask Dave app!
hard rock moment
Visit DaveCafe for my Hard Rock Cafe travel journal!
travel picto-gram
Visit my travel map to see where I have been in this world!
badgemania
Blogography Badge
Atom Syndicate Badge
Comments Syndicate Badge
Apple Safari Badge
Pirate's Booty Badge
Macintosh Badge
license
All content copyright ©2003-2017
by David Simmer II
   
Creative Commons License
This weblog is licensed under
a Creative Commons License.
ssl security
Comodo SSL