My work necessitates that I drive between my hotel and the job site every 2 or 3 hours, which doesn't leave me much time for things like eating and sleeping. But that's the job, and I'm used to it, so I try not to worry about what my freaky schedule required of me. Of course, doing that for eighteen hours straight on only 3 hours of sleep is not the best way to spend an evening, but I do my best not to let the hallucinations and voices in my head get the best of me.
This time, the situation was made all the stranger by the weather here. Wisconsin is flat and on a big lake, so the environment can be really freaky and changes quickly...
After relatively calm weather all day, I was surprised when I left my hotel at 2am and couldn't see anything. The fog was so thick that I could barely see the front of my car, and the headlights were reflected back as if they were hitting a wall. Two hours later, it was mostly clear, but pouring rain. The two-minute walk from my car was enough to soak me to the bone. Two hours after that, it had stopped raining... but there was a nasty haze and winds so strong that I was very nearly blown off the road.
Two hours after that, blue skies were starting to peek through the clouds, and it was time for breakfast at McDonalds.
So there I am eating my Egg & Cheese Biscuit when I hear this "CLICK! CLICK! CLICK!" - the dreaded and unmistakable sound of some COMPLETE F#@%ING IDIOT CLIPPING THEIR F#@%ING FINGERNAILS IN A F#@%ING RESTAURANT!!! AAAARRRRRGGGHHH!! How gross to be trying to eat your breakfast only to have some UNBELIEVABLY RUDE AND TOTALLY DISGUSTING WHITE TRASH BITCH performing her personal grooming two tables back with fingernails flying all over the place. I mean, holy shit! How big of a f#@%ing moron do you have to be to realize that this is not appropriate behavior in a restaurant?
But that's not the worst of it.
SHE WAS A F#@%ING McDONALDS EMPLOYEE ON HER BREAK!!!
Yet no manager told her she was a DISGUSTING BITCH or instructed her to STOP DOING THAT GROSS SHIT WHILE PEOPLE ARE TRYING TO EAT AND SHOVE THOSE F#@%ING FINGERNAIL CLIPPERS UP HER ASS. Oh no. They just merrily let this REVOLTING, REPELLANT, ABHORRENT, SICKENING, NAUSEATING, FOUL, NASTY, DETESTABLE PIECE OF SHIT keep clipping away!!
I left before this REPUGNANT VOMITOUS DUMBASS CRAP-BAG BITCH had a chance to start on her toenails.
And yet, if I had pulled out a gun and shot her, I WOULD BE THE CRIMINAL HERE!! That's just wrong. How will these IGNORANT HALFWITTED RUDE IDIOTIC SHIT-HEAD WHITE-TRASH ASS-LICKERS ever learn proper manners if nobody pops a cap in their ass from time to time?
I wonder if she shaves her legs and gives herself enemas in public too? I wouldn't doubt it.
My nightmares are going to be particularly nasty tonight.
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That’s disgusting. I’ve sat next to someone on a bus who was clipping their fingernails a couple of times and I was grossed out there. I can’t even imagine someone doing it where I am eating. Yuck. I might have nightmares now myself!
Oh man, that is absolutely revolting. I’ve never experienced that thank goodness. It’s things like that which always confirm my suspicions about the general population. They are as truly rude, inconsiderate, and stupid as I thought they were. At what point did people lose a sense of decorum? It seems like common sense that you don’t clip your fingernails in public and most certainly not at a restaurant! It’s time to pull out a giant dildo and start flogging this idiots with it! Actually, that’s a bad idea because they’re probably too stupid that you’re trying to hurt them and not engaging in some form of kinky foreplay!
And yet, if I had pulled out a gun and shot her, I WOULD BE THE CRIMINAL HERE!!
Oh no you wouldn’t! Murdering idiots is legal out here in the Midwest. Fire away!
“IDIOTIC SHIT-HEAD WHITE-TRASH ASS-LICKERS”
Best quote ever. 🙂
Someone I work with has absolutely no problem clipping her fingernails in the lunchroom. As a result, I take my breaks at my desk or outside.
Totally sick. Reminds me of the time that a friend of mine went with me to what was THEN one of my favorite Vietnamese restaurants in Houston. We were sitting there, practically done with our Pho, when I look behind my friend and see the cook come out of the kitchen. He proceeds to sit down at a table 2 spaces behind my friend, take off his shoes, and start plaing with his disgusting feet and fungus loving toenails. BLEGH!!
Yup, definitely working out some anger issues there! Good on you! It’s not quite in the same league, but when kids pick their nose and stick their fingers in their mouth, thinking no one’s watching….that’s just disgusting. Makes you wonder where they get these habits from…*ahem* PARENTS! *ahem*
Just what you’d expect from McDonalds…
I guess that calling them ‘restaurants’ rather than ‘fast food outlets’ is where your problem starts.
That is the most disgusting thing I have heard all month. I don’t even like to be in the same room when my fiance clips his fingernails… yuck, Yuck, YUCK!!!
That is wrong on so many levels. At least it was Wisconsin and not Illinois. I feel better.
I love the windblown frame. I pretty much wish I’d stopped reading there. Blaghgh! I would’ve completely lost my appetite.
It’s bad enough people have no basic manners anymore (excuse me, thank you, etc.); clipping nails in public, particularly where food is served, is egregiously uncouth.
It must be official nail clipping day or something, because I nearly killed my brother this morning when I awoke to that very same sound… He wasn’t even doing it over a trash can or in the bathroom!
REDRUM… REDRUM!!!
Sorry, I’m a bit confused–are we to understand that you ARE or ARE NOT in favor of finger/toenail clipping adjacent to your dining area by restaurant employees? Just wanted to clarify, since you were so wishy-washy about the whole thing.
That’s almost as bad as the time I was in the bathroom at Dairy Queen and the cook came in, did his business, then left…without washing his hands. Forget the Hungerbuster, buster. Make that a Dungerbuster!
People today have no sense of etiquette.
I felt exactly the same way about the Video iPod, in everything I saw the screen looked too small but when I had one in my hands I wanted one. (I still don’t have one)
All the times I’ve been in the Chicago area and it’s been a long time since I was at a museum. I’ve been to the planetarium a dew times lately but not the museum. I’ll have to add that to my list…
It’s in German, but somehow relevant:
http://www.spiegel.de/reise/aktuell/0,1518,387905,00.html
Perhaps you’ll have to stop flying as well as visiting junk food outlets.
Oh horrors… my German skills are rather poor… but if “manikuere” means “fingernail clipper” I think I will cry!
Hmm, brings back memories of someone clipping their fingernails over leftover pizza. How could this possibly happen to you, Dave, TWICE in one lifetime? I’m sorry.
OH THANK YOU VERY MUCH MICHELLE!! I HAD FINALLY GOTTEN THAT OUT OF MY MEMORIES, AND HERE YOU ARE BRINGING IT UP AGAIN! 🙂
Ghastly.
At least now I can appreciate where my hatred of fingernail clipping in restaurants originated. Pizza Bash indeed!
And oh no… here come the memories of people who should never be nude going to a nudist camp… the horror! THE HORROR!!
Heigh ho, heigh ho, it’s back to therapy we go… omg, I had totally forgotten about the nudist camp. I feel a seizure coming on.
Dave,
Whenever I hear people making noises or talking at movie theatres I give them the “HUSH” sound quickly, you should have told the nail clipper to stop doing that because her white trash actions are grossing out the customers. Also, tell the manager. Sometimes, it is nice to be rude!!!!!!!!!!
I too HATE PEOPLE WHO F*CKING CLIP THIER NAILS IN PUBLIC TOO. Thanks for writing about this in such a profound way!
I think you’re both the criminals here… eating at mcdonalds, YUCK! How can you live with yourselves… there are definetly more worse of things in this world to be complaining about then clipping finger nails, jease….!
i was in a mall once and going up to the next floor in a glass elevator, and i just happen to look out the glass and what do i see? a woman sitting on a bench WITH BOTH OF HER SHOES OFF and CLIPPING HER TOENAILS in the mall. i immediatly pointed this out to my friend and everyone in the elevator started looking and soon i learned that ALL OF THE 7 PEOPLE SQUISHED IN THE ELEVATOR HAD HAD ALMOST THE EXACT SAME THING HAPPEN TO THEM.
ew
Wow! I have my own blog but it is nowere near as cool as yours! and EEEWWW! By the way… GO DAVE!