Yesterday the boxes came to return my old Apple Watch and iPhone.

And I just spent nearly two hours trying to follow the instructions on how to prepare the devices for return. Because of course the instructions I received didn't reflect reality. Log out of the App Store? Out of iCloud? How? You've greyed out all options that allow me to get anywhere near my account. It's insanely fucking stupid how Apple doesn't ever seem to know what the hell is happening with their own shit. Absolutely nothing I was given for my watch or phone was as they said. And even when I got to the screen which (maybe?) allowed me to log out and de-register my devices, I kept getting error screens popping up telling me that my iCloud account and my iMessage account didn't match so nothing would work. I finally clicked the "do it" button fast enough that the mismatch error didn't have a chance to display, and I think everything it removed. Maybe. I mean, the "hello!" welcome message is showing now, so I guess I'm good?

For the love of God, how fucking difficult is it for the people who write the fucking instructions to actually give them a try before posting them? If it were my job to write the shit, that's what I'd do.

But apparently Apple doesn't give a fuck, because they're perfectly happy posting bad information... regardless of whether or not it makes their customers want to take a sledgehammer to their shit.