Blogography Logo



Posted on Friday, June 12th, 2009

Dave!It's getting to the point that I can't stand to attend public functions because there's bound to be people there.

And most people suck.

Today I attended a conference with other people and came very close to having to kill them all. It started with the dumbass who came in late then sat next to me eating an apple. I didn't pay good money to attend this shit so I could listen to an asshole chomp an apple while somebody is speaking. Then I nearly had to kill the two idiots behind me who were talking the entire time. And don't get me started on the bitch wearing fifty bracelets who was clanking and jingling every time she moved... which was often, because she was taking notes and flipping her hair every ten seconds.

It's this kind of inconsiderate bullshit that causes me to become homicidal. People PAY to attend conferences so they can learn stuff. But you can't learn stuff when you can't hear anything because people won't shut the fuck up and stop being a distraction.

It makes me want to hold my own conferences.

With an attendance of just one person... ME!

Unfortunately, the fee to attend such a conference would be a lot more money than I got.

Psycho Cat sez...

Psycho Cat Hypnotizes You to Give Dave Ur Munneh!

The good news is that once I blow this popsicle stand, I'm off to my sister's house.

It's party time.

Tags: , ,
Categories: DaveLife 2009Click To It: Permalink


  1. Crail00 says:

    The bitch with the jangling bracelets reminds me of a scene from the original “Auntie Mame” with Rosalind Russell.

    A great movie, IMHO.

  2. Jeff says:

    Oh noz… Blogography can haz becum a cat blog!

  3. jenny says:

    I have this overwhelming urge to send you my bank account number, SSN and mother’s maiden name.


  4. Nicole says:

    I feel your pain as the same thing happened to me many years ago when I paid to attend Nikon Digital Photography School. Idiot eating an apple was there too! That bastard. It’s people like him that keep me from going to most public events and the reason why I rarely see a movie within two weeks of opening, and when I do, it’s the first showing of the day @ 11 am. Even then there’s some dickweed making too much noise which leads me to concur that most people are douchebags. Present company excluded. 🙂

  5. Colin B. says:

    That is sooooo annoying. It happens to me every time too. I have found myself in situations like this too many times. It’s even harder when you are running the conference because you don’t want to be rude to the attendees.

    Having said this, I feel the same way about being around people lately too. I thought I was just PMSing but since I’m not alone (and I doubt we’ve managed to sync our cycles from such a distance), I’ll put the blame where it belongs: On them and their jingling bracelets.

  6. Mik says:

    I hate conferences too for similar reasons but then I always have trouble staying awake, I have to the Ipcress File thing and jab nails into my hands!

  7. whitenoise says:

    psycho kitty, que est que c’est
    Fa fa fa fa fa fa fa fa fa far better

  8. Faiqa says:

    Oh, dear, hahahahahaha at “Today I attended a conference with other people and came very close to having to kill them all.” Funny.

  9. whall says:

    Maybe you should attend a conference on how to pay better attention to things you care about.


    And maybe this would help you focus on happier things.


    You know,


    that’s probably the cause of many of your


    “episodes” where you feel homicidal. Know what I mean?


Add a Comment


I love comments! However, all comments are moderated, and won't appear until approved. Are you an abusive troll with nothing to contribute? Don't bother. Selling something? Don't bother. Spam linking? Don't bother.
PLEASE NOTE: My comment-spam protection requires JavaScript... if you have it turned off or are using a mobile device without JavaScript, commenting won't work. Sorry.



Your personal information is optional. Email addresses are never shown, and are only used by me if a public reply would be too personal or inappropriate here. The URL link to your web site or blog will be provided, so only fill this in if you want people to visit!



Blogography is a place to learn and grow by exposing yourself to the mind of David Simmer II, a brilliant commentator on world events and popular culture (or so he claims).
Dave FAQ:
Frequently Asked Questions
Dave Contact:
Blogography Webfeeds:
Atom Entries Feed
Comments Feed
translate me
flags of the world!
lost & found
Search Blogography:
thrice fiction
Thrice Fiction Magazine - March, 2011 - THE END
I'm co-founder of Thrice Fiction magazine. Come check us out!
hard rock moment
Visit DaveCafe for my Hard Rock Cafe travel journal!
travel picto-gram
Visit my travel map to see where I have been in this world!
Blogography Badge
Atom Syndicate Badge
Comments Syndicate Badge
Apple Safari Badge
Pirate's Booty Badge
Macintosh Badge
All content copyright ©2003-2022
by David Simmer II
Creative Commons License
This weblog is licensed under
a Creative Commons License.
ssl security