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Bludgeon

Posted on Friday, April 11th, 2008

Dave!


Bludgeoning Morons
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Bludgeoning Morons

   

   

Blame it on Friday.

Last Saturday when I was flying to Salt Lake City and had my first layover in Seattle, some crazy bitch sat down next to me and pulled out a book by an author I positively loathe. I'd go so far as to say that I hate this author, but I try really hard not to hate anybody. Suffice to say I dislike the author enough that it makes me want to rip the book out of crazy bitch's hands and beat her to death with it.

Except I try really hard not to be violent either.

In real life, anyway.

In cartoons I don't mind a little violence thrown in for entertainment value.

So as I sat there fuming that somebody paid money for a book that's filled with gross exaggerations, half-truths, blatant lies, and vile hatred... all in the name of selling books to morons who are too lazy to seek the truth and too stupid to care that they're being manipulated... I drew a cartoon.

Then decided it went too far and promptly filed it away, never to be seen again.

Until today.

Because I'm lazy, don't feel like blogging, and it's Friday.

But mostly because it's Friday.


Categories: DaveToons 2008Click To It: Permalink
   

Comments

  1. Neil T. says:

    Don’t worry Dave, it had to be done. Those people need removing from the gene pool anyway.

    (Note to the FBI: I’m only joking. Really. You can send the black helicopters away now.)

  2. Brandon says:

    Either way, she’s dead to me.

  3. Penelope says:

    I just adore angry Dave. Those cute furrowed brows!
    PS. I actually have no idea who this woman is that people keep mentioning and I’m too scared to Google her, should I keep it that way? ;o)

  4. kaelb says:

    Well, since I don’t feel like saying something related (because it is Friday), I thought I should tell you about the new games announced by telltale games for the Wii. But its Friday and I am lazy so you can check it out for yourself.

  5. IronicMoth says:

    HA.. Ann Coulter.
    I wonder if you hold those sentiments of absolute hatred (with such intensity) towards any other author?
    Because I totally see what you mean!.. I dislike many authors, but Coulter is one bitch (and I don’t use that term lightly) I would not mind see go through a jet engine while I watch in amusement from my window seat : )

  6. Turnbaby says:

    Excellent!! Dispatching justice, improving the gene pool and not one speck of blood on Lil Davey.

    I’m impressed ;-)

  7. That’s an awesome cartoon! And sorry about your stone :(

  8. kapgar says:

    You know I’d totally forgive you for that. But only if you burn the book afterwards.

  9. Karl says:

    The problem is you just left the Coulter book on the floor, all bloodied, but still totally available to be picked up by another moron. Seriously, Dave, I’m surprised at your incompetent cartoon violence.

  10. Miss Britt says:

    You should have made a sign and started a protest right then and there.

  11. Jeff says:

    What’s the line from Rocky Horror Picture Show? “Society must be protected”? That’s all you’re doing. Protecting society.

  12. Poppy says:

    The image series made me burst out laughing, thanks for that. My favorite part is the X X eyes in the last image.

  13. Avitable says:

    That was awesome – never should have been filed away in the first place.

  14. sizzle says:

    I totally think the violence was called for in this instance.

  15. Jeff says:

    I noticed the other two guys in the cartoon didn’t seem to mind that you beat her to death either, so I’d say it was the right move.

  16. Winter says:

    I love how the guy on her other side has blood on him and his expression never changes. He saw that book and knew what was coming…

  17. Hilly Sue says:

    It’s true! You ARE a hit man!

    I love how Lil Dave just sits back down all “la-la-la” like he didn’t just beat the shit out of a woman with a book.

  18. kilax says:

    I often find myself disliking people because they believe in certain things. I think I am judgmental, but I can’t help it.

  19. I beat up some random person on my flight last week because they interrupted me while I was watching “The Golden Compass.” Seriously. Idiotic travelers frequently need beatings to keep them in line. Or dead.

    Great cartoon!

  20. lizriz says:

    Maybe she was a feminist who believes that you can’t criticize a book if you haven’t read it.

    Although, perhaps in that case a book cover is called for. :)

  21. martin says:

    What worries me is the total lack of interest from the fellow passengers. Is this the society that we now live in, a woman beaten to death on a plane and no one cares ?.

  22. ChillyWilly says:

    Classic Dave Toon. And one that I’m glad you didn’t permanently file away.

    As a fellow A.C. hater, I don’t understand why people read that trash. I would rather see people reading romance novels or even *shudder* THE SECRET. At least something that expands the mind or makes an attempt to better one’s self. Ms. Coulter’s blatant shit-for-text is just wrong for anyone.

  23. Dave2 says:

    Neil… I don’t think the FBI cares, because their domestic and you’re a Brit… but I’m sure the CIA will be knocking on your door any minute now…

    Brandon… Yes, but only one of them will land you in prison for manslaughter!

    Penelope… I would. :-)

    Kaelb… If you’re talking about Sam & Max, I got it on my news feed!

    IronicMoth… Oh I have pent-up rage for a lot of authors whose only interest is dividing people to make a buck!

    Turnbaby… Lil’ Dave knows the important of blood evidence in a jury trial… he watches CSI!

    LSL… Thanks. I’ll be better soon. :-)

    Mr. Fab… And here I thought you’d be upset because I didn’t take things far enough and violate her corpse or something!

    Kapgar… A fire in the middle of an airport would probably attract security.

    Karl… It’s a trap!

    Miss Britt… Killing is far easier than going to all that trouble.

    Jeff… Indeed. Society isn’t going to protect itself you know!

    Poppy… Shame on you for laughing at such heinous violence! :-)

    Avitable… Probably. Except I do worry that if I ever become a serial killer in real life that things like this could be used as evidence against me.

    Sizzle… Yes… this is one of those things (like World War II) where it’s okay to be violent.

    Jeff… Isn’t it sad how society has been desensitized to such violence?

    Winter… He probably figures that getting a little bloody was a small price to pay for such a serious offense.

    Hilly Sue… Well, there’s no sense him getting all upset over it. There’s not much he can do about it now!

    Kilax… Human nature?

    Granddaughter… And yet killing idiotic travelers that ruin the experience for the rest of us is considered a crime! Is there no justice?

    Lizriz… She was using her cash register receipt as a bookmark which means that she bought it (instead of borrowing or stealing it) and her money went towards supporting an author who utilizaes hate, lies, and divsionist tactics to destroy what’s left of this country. I think that pretty much warrants getting beat to death. :-)

    Martin… Well, technically they are in the gate waiting area at the airport… but yes, while it’s very sad in a cartoon, it’s downright tragic when it happens in real life. How many times have we read where somebody was viciously attacked, raped, or killed while people stood by and did nothing?

    ChillyWilly… They read it because they actually believe the author is an unbiased resource for information. Never-mind that most of the author’s books (and this one in particular) has been torn to pieces by researchers pointing out all the gross misinformation it propagates, some people would rather believe what’s easy than true.

  24. Chris says:

    Now Dave, maybe she’s really open minded and she’s just reading the book to get the insight of a man living as a woman…

  25. Hey – I was just scrolling through the cartoons – and like Wow, lil’ Dave got some cool book-killer kung-fu moves!

  26. Dustin says:

    I knew the second I saw that bony ass bird face on the book that it was Coulter.

    If ever there was as bride of Satan…

  27. Tracy Lynn says:

    Dude, going too far is AWESOME. I go too far ALL THE TIME.
    It looks good on you.

  28. That’s a great way to work out your aggression… The cartooning, I mean… Not the bludgeoning.

  29. Jonathan says:

    I saw her books (along with her comrades in the “Social Science” section of a Waldenbooks.

    Seriously, Coulter and Social Science?

    Hmmph.

  30. Sue says:

    I don’t like Ann either. I would have been just as pissed.

  31. Aunt Robin says:

    Maybe this calls for a good old-fashioned book burning. I’ll bring the matches.

    And gasoline.

  32. ETinNY says:

    In response to Chris’ “insight of a man living as a woman..” A.C.’s not even human. She’s the spawn of Satan. Dave, you should’ve taken an ‘interested’ glance at her book and then told her: “I hope the hijackers get you first!” and then gone back to playing with your iphone.

  33. claire says:

    I’m always a bit appalled that my dental hygienist leaves the tv in her space on Fox news, but I don’t have enough facts memorized to make a convincing argument against the station. Also, I’m sure there’s self-preservation at work too.

    I ended up putting it on Flash Gordon (even though it’s awful). I would’ve turned the tv off, but it’s like refusing a beverage from your host when you do.

  34. Mrs. K says:

    A.C. was beaten with an ugly stick from the inside out! Thank you Dave for expressing how many of us feel.

  35. Catherine says:

    I love how the pupils dilate in the third panel. You are a terrific artist and great communicator.

    I hope you completely resolve this story and kill the BOOK in part 2. You’d be hard pressed to find anyone more anti-censorship than myself, yet I wouldn’t mind at all seeing even the most wretched, horrifying violence committed against anything by that particular author.

  36. Jake Titus says:

    I too am not inclined to hate. I dislike quite a few people but find it hard to hate them. That bitch is pushing the envelope!!!

  37. joy says:

    This post is 100% awesome!

  38. kapgar says:

    You think the fire would attract more attention than you bludgeoning a woman with a book?

  39. annie says:

    I glanced at the cartoon and said, “Huh?” then I squinted a little closer and saw Ann Coulter.
    Gah! Then I TOTALLY got it. Ha-ha-ha!
    She is SICKENING.

  40. Samantha says:

    I wouldn’t have blamed you if you beat her with it…

    I am a used bookstore junkie and whenever I come across one of her books I don’t mind shoveling out the $3 to buy it and then throw it in the trash to prevent it from going into the hands of others….works well with Rush Limbaugh books too.

  41. Alexander says:

    MOST excellent, Dave! I’ve long believed that civilization (with it’s laws and whatnot) firmly put an end to human evolution, by preventing the removal of the gene pool rejects. Just see where it’s gotten us!

  42. yellojkt says:

    I think Ann Coulter books are great. It’s unfortunate that most bookstores file them under Politics rather than Satire.

  43. Justin Scott says:

    This is absolutely hilarious. I keep imagining it as an animation… can we make such a thing happen?

    Note to self, relearn Adobe Flash.

  44. That’s why I read Sci-Fi on planes.

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