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Sparkles

Posted on Monday, November 20th, 2006

Dave!I very nearly just died. I think I turned blue and everything.

All because I was stupid enough to attempt drinking a Coke with Lime while watching How I Met Your Mother when Robin's dirty secret was revealed. Seriously, for everybody who has ever wanted me dead, your wish nearly came true as I choked to death watching Robin Sparkles GOING TO THE MALL! Best. Video. Ever. My apologies to our Canadian neighbors, but this is about the funniest thing I've seen all year. Could this show be any funnier? This second season is even better than the first, but I will absolutely be buying the DVD set when it hits tomorrow. Suit up!

How I Met Your Mother

The good news here is that if I had died, I would have done so wearing my totally awesome Milwaukee Admirals Limited Edition Custom Hockey Jersey which arrived today!

Admirals Jersey Front

Admirals Jersey Back

I used to think that my red leather thong was my favorite piece of clothing... but this is SO much cooler than that! If it didn't smell like toxic fumes and need to be washed, I'd wear it to bed.

Now that I know I'm not going to die tonight, can I just say how disappointed I am that the only thing that went through my mind as I was laying on the floor gasping for breath was "holy shit... if I die, I won't get to see Veronica Mars tomorrow night!" — how sad is that? Though, I suppose if you turn it around, you could say that my desire to see the next episode of Veronica is what got me through this.

I'll bet that's not the first time Kristen Bell has been responsible for giving a guy the will to live.


Categories: Dave Approved, Television 2006Click To It: Permalink
   

Comments

  1. adena says:

    Ooh….Lime Coke out the nostrils HURTS!

    (not that I speak from experience, or anything…)

  2. Göran says:

    Red leather thong and Milwaukee Hockey shirt sounds like the perfect match.

  3. The Chad says:

    Tight jersey.

    You put the lime in the coke you nut….

  4. Mooselet says:

    I really like that shirt. You should make sure that if you die prematurely you not only do it in that shirt, but be buried in it as well.

  5. Brandon says:

    That seals it. I’m asking for a personalized Admirals jersey for Christmas. That is awesome!

  6. serap says:

    The good thing about your red leather thong and your limited edition custom hockey jersey is that they are not mutually exclusive. You wear those two items together and what you have is a serious party outfit ;-)

  7. Robin says:

    This show rocks. I found it about halfway through the season last year. The music video last night was the funniest thing I have ever seen. I can’t wait to see the full 1st season.

  8. Avitable says:

    I tried to watch that show when it first aired, but at the first sound of the laughtrack, I turned it off and could never convince myself to try it again. No matter how much I love Alyson Hannigan.

  9. Jeff says:

    That jersey rocks. I would totally wear it – and I don’t even like hockey!

  10. delmer says:

    Robin Sparkles tore me up. That song was bouncing around in my head before I even clicked the Blogography link.

    The slapping was pretty good too.

    I wish Lily would go back to being a redhead.

  11. nancycle says:

    Now, if I die laughing at this entry, my last image will be of you in a red leather thong, hockey jersey (nice one I might add) and cowboy boots (purely for my entertainment) which are interchangable in my mind’s eye with a pair work socks, Kodiacs and a Lumber jacket…Ooohhh Dave, you’re looking fine.

    Hope to see you in the food court! ;-)

    p.s. Canada says “You’re Welcome”.

  12. diane says:

    Ever since the first time I saw my little cousin play hockey I’ve been a hockey junkie. I really need to get myself to more live hockey games. And I need a personalized jersey to wear! How awesome would it be to have, “SPARKS” on the back of my jersey??
    (I’ve shot gingerale out my nose–it stings far less than the more harsh options)

  13. Hilly says:

    That episode was legend – wait for it – dary.

    OMG, how funny about the mall thing; I seriously almost fell on the floor laughing!

  14. Dave2 says:

    Adena… it’s even better corroding your lungs!

    Göran… I agree. I should write to the Admirals and suggest it as the official team uniform.

    The Chad… Actually, Coke does it for me. It’s pre-canned!

    Mooselet… I’m going to be cremated and have my ashes spread over Mt. Haleakala in Maui, so I think I’d rather the jersey go to the Dave Museum.

    Brandon… It takes weeks to arrive, so you may not get it in time for the holiday. And, by the way, the custom lettering is pricey, but SO worth it.

    Serap… Totally! It’s what I plan to be wearing to TequilaCon PACNW in March!

    Robin… The show kind of changed focus in the second season by jettisoning some things that weren’t working and focusing on the things that were, but the first was still entertaining.

    Avitable… Don’t blame you. I learned to tune out laugh tracks ages ago. Otherwise, their sucky nature would ruin a lot of shows. I wonder why their still used? Seems kind of antiquated. I guess most television-watching Americans are too stupid to laugh on their own and need to be told?

    Jeff… I don’t mind hockey, but Seattle doesn’t have a major team, so I never got into it growing up. :-(

    Delmer… Just about everything was funny about last night’s episode, Robin being a teen pop star in Canada (where the 80’s didn’t arrive until 1993) was just the icing on the cake. Love that show.

    Nancycle… Canada is the greatest country ever, because it gave us Robin Sparkles!!

    Diane… OMG! YOU COULD CHANGE YOUR NAME TO DIANE SPARKLES AND BE ROBIN’S MALL-SISTER!

    Hilly… I think we should all go to the mall now!

  15. Kristin says:

    hey Dave. Glad you’re not dead. :)

    But don’t knock the Thunderbirds.

  16. karla says:

    ok so the words ‘red leather thong’ are burnt into my brain. And I cannot read anything else on your blog but ‘red leather thong’.

    red leather read leather red leather THONG.

    Is it a theme thong?

  17. The Chad says:

    ok….you didnt get it. you remember that super annoying coke commercial where they were introducing the coke with lime and they had that retarted ass song? oh well.

  18. Dave2 says:

    Kristin… Uhhh… I didn’t know I had knocked the Thunderbirds! :-)

    Karla… If you’re still in Oslo when I’m there, I’ll knock on your door wearing a red leather thong and my Admirals jersey. Then you can sing my theme song! Errmmm… if you don’t jump out the window first…

    The Chad… Holy shit! They were saying “Lime with the Coke In It?” Well that makes a lot more sense than “coconut.” Gee… I really am as stupid as I look! Quick, somebody submit me to PYMMOTI!

  19. Laurence says:

    AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH !!!!
    “Veronica Mars” and now “How I met your mother” !!!
    NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!

    And the Milwaukee Admirals Limited Edition Custom Hockey Jersey… I think I could wear it like a nightdress !!! Sorry Dave, but I couldn’t wear it for work… It’s only my opinion !

    PS. Do you choose the number 00 ? If yes, why ? Out of curiosity…

  20. Dave2 says:

    00 is a squad number that isn’t used in hockey (at least, not that I know of)… so I picked it because I knew that no other player on the ACTUAL Admirals teem would be using it.

    Since it’s not a “real” number, it kind of shows I’m not a “real” player. :-)

  21. yellojkt says:

    The Robin Sparkles video is awesome. They kinda glossed over that she is at least ten years too young to be a Tiffany Wannabe.

  22. Juli says:

    I can’t help it… every time I see your last name I think about the time Garth Brooks was on SNL… SIMMAH DOWN NOW…. SIMMAHDOWNOW…. oh that was funny stuff. Hey, cool jersey and thanks for yet ANOTHER dvd recommendation.

    OH, totally off subject. I met with my mentee last night and she told me about the story she wrote for school. A kid’s story about a monkey, appropriately named “Monkey”. Monkey and his sister go into the woods to play. There, he eyes a beautiful bunch of bananas hanging in a tree. He jumps, leaps, does everything he can think to do to knock those beauts down but to no avail. He wears himself out and ends up falling asleep beneath the tree. He is scared awake when wouldn’t you know it, the bananas fall on him! Come to find out, his (bad monkey) sister was in the tree earlier holding on to the bananas and made sure he couldn’t get them. He happily grabs the gorgeous bananas and takes them home with him.

    Not bad for an 11-year-old, eh??

  23. I *just* wrote about how HIMYM makes me laugh til I cry an come here to find out you beat me to the punch. That’s cool though since it was your writing about ti that made me satrt watching it this season.

    Also, totally gonna steal the jersey from you. You’re against violence so I’m fairly certain I’ll win. ;-)

  24. Wayne Hall says:

    If I could call myself a year ago and say “dude, you’re going to switch from Pepsi leaded to Diet Coke with Lime because some guy online said something about it” I’d be all like “shuddap, dude”.

    But it’s true. I called myself and that’s what I said.

    Thank you, Dave, for saving me a couple hundred calories a day. Makes room for the buttery goodness.

  25. Kevin says:

    I can’t believe a MySpace profile really exists. Gotta show Katie. She and I nearly died watching that episode. God we love that show. But this episode still doesn’t best Swarley.

  26. Belinda says:

    And I thought that the “Slap-Bet” sub-plot was the best part of that episode. I can’t believe how hard I was laughing every time someone got slapped. We got to have a lengthy debate over the whole “10 immediate slaps vs. 5 random slaps over a lifetime” issue.

  27. Anthony says:

    Man you are always right about TV shows. I’ve watched the complete first season and it kicked ass.

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