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Shame

Posted on Thursday, November 3rd, 2005

Dave!I am so totally bummed. My PowerBook appears to be dying. I guess I shouldn't be surprised... the poor thing is three years old and has been drug around the world a dozen times over. I've grown quite attached to her, but the constant overheating and erratic behavior makes her unreliable, and I need a PowerBook I can count on.

Sadly, methinks it's time to consider a replacement. =Sob!= It seems like only yesterday I was waxing poetic over my Titanium-covered baby...

DavePowerBook

In the midst of my grief over my ailing PowerBook companion, I received an odd call on my mobile phone. Unfortunately for the anonymous bitch who called, I was in no mood for a wrong number, especially with her attitude...

Dave: Hello?
   
Anonymous Bitch: WHERE ARE YOU? YOU'RE 30 MINUTES LATE!! WE'RE GOING TO ORDER WITHOUT YOU!!!
   
Dave: WELL I'M SORRY!! I crapped myself on the way to the restaurant and thought it would be better to change my pants and be late rather than show up smelling like shit! Order me a jelly donut and a fifth of Jack Daniel's and I'll be there in ten minutes!
   
Anonymous Bitch: WHAT? WHO IS THIS??
   
Dave: I SAID TEN MINUTES!! And that donut had better be fresh!

Sigh.

Can you appreciate how difficult it is being me? I am forever lashing out with smart-ass comments and then immediately regretting it afterwards. My only excuse is that I am so incredibly brilliant that my evil brain is capable of bypassing my sense of shame on its own accord. Either that, or I have no shame to begin with. Either way, it's just not my fault, so I suppose I should stop feeling bad about it.

There. I feel much better knowing that I am not to blame for my poor behavior.

The day wasn't all bad news, however... a big congratulations to James & Erin on the birth of their new baby girl! Welcome to the world Vivian Bow! I must admit to being a bit surprised that they didn't name their first-born child after me though.

Oh well. Even though "David Vivian Bow" has a nice ring to it, I'm very happy for the three of them.

Speaking of happiness, have you registered yourself on the Blogography Reader's Map over at Frappr? Other than sending me a million dollars, it's the easiest way to ensure you will be spared my wrath once my evil plan for world domination has been unleashed. Only by registering now are you assured of my benevolence come D-Day! Mwah ha ha haaaaah!


Categories: Apple Stuff 2005, DaveLife 2005Click To It: Permalink
   

Comments

  1. Chaz says:

    I’m sorry to hear about your PowerBook. I know that I can’t live without my laptop (it seems to go everywhere with me), and I’d be crushed it if started to go on the fritz. On the note of wrong numbers, man… I wish I’d thought of that as a retort for those rude individuals who don’t bother making sure they’ve called the right person. Then again, knowing me, I probably wouldn’t get up the courage to say it, but I’d have been thinking it. Nonetheless, I’m sure they’d have cowered merely from my thoughts!

  2. ssp says:

    Sorry for the Powerbook. I’ve been there… and it’s a very sad experience. What exactly is troubling the machine?

    That Frapper thing looks pretty neat… but definitely unfinished. Let’s just say it has severe difficulties to accept Göttingen as a city name due to at least one of non-ASCII unawareness and encoding problems. Not that it was particularly difficult, but I even made my own map called qlc… be the first to put your mark on it!

    Oh, and what did you regret about that phone call?

  3. Dave2 says:

    Living without a portable would be torture for me, and I am totally crushed… especially since the new “aluminum” models aren’t as sexy as my older “titanium” version.

    My PowerBook seems to get corrupted easily… even though the hard disk has checked out okay every time. Right now, for instance, Mail doesn’t work, NetNewswire won’t hide, and the menu bar for the Finder is all messed up. And I just did a re-install two days ago for similar problems with completely different apps. Not only that, but she’s running really hot and both fans are on continuously.

    As for the phone call… I regret swearing to a total stranger who was obviously upset. She was having a bad day, and all I did was make things worse for her. Granted, she shouldn’t have torn into me without verifying that I was the right number, but still. And now I worry that maybe the guy she was waiting for died in a car accident or something, and that’s why he was late. Thoughts like this always plague me after being a smart-ass. I should learn my lesson, but never seem to…

  4. Kevin says:

    I actually held a conversation in Spanish with a woman who called with the wrong number to me once. All she spoke was Spanish. It had been years since I had a convo en Espanol, but it all came back to me rather naturally. Scared the bejeezus out of me.

    “it’s the easiest way to ensure you will be spared my wrath once my evil plan for world domination has been unleashed.”

    Huh? I thought what you were doing was the equivalent of the aliens’ plan in ID4 where they had satellites at equidistant locations around the globe to help coordinate the attack. You mean we’re just being spared? We’re not Dave’s Evil Little Minions of Destruction (TM)?

  5. Kevin says:

    Oh God! Can’t believe I didn’t get this in my last comment… sorry about the PBook. It’s not a good thing to have to say goodbye to a friend like that. My PBook is now about 6 1/2 years old. It would kill me if it died.

  6. Dave2 says:

    But how can my minions perform their part in my evil master plan if they are incinerated when I rain fire upon the city in which they live? Minions must be spared before they can carry out my divine retribution! And only by registering their home town on the Blogography Reader Map will I know where they reside. :-)

  7. Gringo says:

    Has been.. drug? Or did you mean dragged? :D

  8. ssp says:

    It’s of course impossible to diagnose this correctly from far away, but it doesn’t really sound like a hardware problem to me. Perhaps just some broken preferences? Have you tried using a fresh account on the same machine?

    I fully see the point about the current Powerbooks being mediocre at best. That (and some price vs. quality issues) is why I went for an iBook and feel limited by the even smaller screen now…

  9. apryldawwn says:

    i thought your answer to the anon call was ingenious and made for a good laugh.

    you never know, maybe she was intrigued by you…

  10. kilax says:

    What an adorable baby!

    Sorry bout the shitty phone call. People are dumb!

    Have fun picking out the new computer!

  11. Craig Hind says:

    Sorry to hear about your PowerBook.

    I also had a TiBook that died recently. Must be that time when old PowerBooks die. Mine was also 3+ years old.

    Now I’ve got me a nice shiny new PowerBook and believe me, as much as you likes the TiBook you’re gonna love all the cool new features of the newer ‘books.

    Pity Apple didn’t let us know that they were updating the range before I bought my new baby…

  12. Belinda says:

    Three years? That’s all you get? Wow, I understand your heartbreak!

    I luuuuuuv me some baby pictures.

    Also, I just learned from watching Hitchcock’s “Shadow of a Doubt”, that if you are nearly killed by carbon monoxide poisoning, someone should rub your feet immediately. Just thought you should know.

  13. Umm, why would you regret that lash-out? It was HILARIOUS! I’m gonna have to misdial your number more often. PS: Shame is totally overrated.

  14. Chris says:

    Sorry to hear about the Powerbook. You have got backups of everything right? Hope you get a good replacement soon.

    And as for the phone call transcript it’s the funniest thing I’ve heard in a while!

  15. Dave2 says:

    I have back-ups, so it’s not the data I am worried about… I just don’t like the new aluminum models as well as my beautiful titanium PowerBook. =Sob!=

  16. Neil T. says:

    Hey – saw this and thought of you: http://appleinsider.com/article.php?id=1359

    Looks like Apple may be transitioning to Intel a little earlier than they originally said they were.

  17. Dave2 says:

    Yeah… there’s always something better on the horizon.

    I like the idea of a 20% thinner PowerBook… but unless the Intel model runs significantly faster, I’m not too disappointed. :-)

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