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The Fake is the Thing

Posted on Monday, March 9th, 2026

Dave!I honestly don't understand why the fuck people concern themselves with what other people are eating. Or, even worse, condemn people for their choices. A lot of times this comes down to "food influencers" shaming everybody for content. Telling people that their cheaper foods are garbage and they should be eating expensive organic stuff instead. Whether people can afford it or not. Or, in the case of truly fucking shitty "food influencers" (like the Queen of Bullshit Misinformation, "Food Babe" Vani Hari) dishing outright misinformation about food, and condemning methods of food production which they deems "bad" even though science may not support the claim. But influencers doesn't give a fuck. All they care about is the clicks for cash.

In my case, I simply don't want to kill animals to eat. Period. That's what guides my dietary choices. And, lucky for me, food options exist which help me achieve my goal. And, much to my joy, these options are getting more versatile, convenient, and delicious all the time. I am currently hopelessly addicted to Beyond Stack Burgers. I would eat them morning, noon, and night if the coconut oil content didn't cause me digestion woes. So instead I just eat them morning and night.

And, yes, I know what the fuck is in it. The ingredients are right on the package, so I don't need some shitty "influencer" to read them to me: Water, Pea Protein, Canola Oil, Refined Coconut Oil, Rice Protein, Natural Flavors, 2% or less of Methylcellulose, Potato Protein, Apple Extract, Salt, Pomegranate Concentrate, Vinegar, Lemon Juice Concentrate, Potassium Salt, Dextrose, Spices, Faba Bean Protein, Vitamins and Minerals (Zinc Sulfate, Niacinamide [Vitamin B3], Pyridoxine Hydrochloride [Vitamin B6], Cyanocobalamin [Vitamin B12], Calcium Pantothenate [Vitamin B5]), Vegetable Juice Color (with Beet).

And, yes, I know what the fuck the nutrition values are. That's printed right on the package too. The only problematic values to me are saturated fat (from the coconut oil) and the sodium (260mg).

But God-forbid I be allowed to make decisions for myself without somebody stepping in to tell me where I'm going wrong.

Lately I've been inundated with videos about why plant-based meats have "failed."

Most of it is the shitty fucking influencer brigade, praising people for finally coming to their senses by dropping horribly "unhealthy" fake meats and going back to real meat (mad cow, cancerous tumors, feces, steroids, and all). Because nothing screams "health" than having cow shit in your hamburger, I guess.

But the real story is more nuanced and interesting than that. Which is where actual journalism comes into play... like this story from Business Insider...

I'm glad they didn't leave out the fact that real meat is heavily subsidized by the government while plant-base "meat" is mostly left to fend for itself. This, coupled with the economics of scale, put fake "meat" at a disadvantage compared to the slaughterhouses. I'm happy to drive a (relatively) cheap car so I can afford my chosen diet (among other things), but a lot of people aren't. Though given the current high price of food, the extra money is a drop in the bucket compared to the total grocery bill which is hurting vegetarians and carnivores alike.

If "food influencers" truly gave a shit about people's well-being, they'd put their energy into advocating being able to afford food in the first place.

But that doesn't pay as well, so here we are.

Comments

  1. Christopher Stogdill says:

    1st off love you David.

    That being said, I have no qualms about killing animals for food, and would/have no issue having to do so personally. I think everyone willing to eat meat should have to, at some time, have a more personal stake in putting meat on the table. Might get more vegans that way, but I also don’t think that vegans get off so easy either as there is so much killing that occurs in growing, well anything really. It’s the circle of life and whatnot. I can’t stand people with holier-than-thou attitudes when it comes to food (not saying this is you by any means). I also can’t stand making animals suffer needlessly, but I’m sure my opinion on what is needless is different that somebody else’s.

    I’m looking forward to the day when I can raise my own meat and realistically have my own garden. At least then I can have a more direct say in how my food is produced and what the cost to everyone and everything involved.

    “God-forbid I be allowed to make decisions for myself without somebody stepping in to tell me where I’m going wrong.” There is nothing wrong with your choices and that’s a hill I’d (theoretically) die on, even if I didn’t have the same opinion. Those self-important “influencers” can go fuck themselves.

    • Dave2 says:

      I have no problem with people who eat meat… just like I don’t appreciate being lectured on my food choices, I’m not doing that for others. That being said, conversations about food are always welcome, regardless of diet. The only line I draw is food-shaming, which is the bread and butter of “food influencers.”

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