Yesterday on my way into work I decided that I wanted some of that cheddar popcorn I like so much. So I stopped at the mini mart, grabbed a Coke Zero and a bag of the popcorn and made my merry way to the office.
Then, once lunchtime rolled around, I grabbed my Coke from the refrigerator and opened the bag...
And was disgusted by what I was tasting. It was awful. Tasted like chemicals poured over a pair of crusty gym socks. I couldn't understand it. Until I looked closer at the packaging and saw that Smartfood didn't just update their packaging... this was a "Simply" version of the product that was low-calorie or whatever...
"GAH! THIS POPCORN IS WOKE! I exclaimed.
Because people seem to be incredibly fond of using "woke" to describe things they don't like now-a-days, despite it simply meaning to be awake and empathetic to what challenges other people are facing. But People who don't give a fuck about other people have co-opted it, branded it as "wokeness," and use it to show people just how un-empathetic they are towards anybody but themselves...
Brilliant creator unknown.
Today I went back to the mini mart to buy a replacement for the WOKE popcorn I had to throw out because I was still craving it.
Yes, from now on I'll be very careful to buy only UN-WOKE popcorn.
The way God and the Founding Fathers intended it to be.