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And So Jake is Trying to Kill Me…

Posted on Wednesday, December 27th, 2017

Dave!Living in the upper latitudes as I do, winter makes for crappy weather. It's cold, wet, and dark. And its dark for a really long time each day. When I get up to feed the cats at 7am, it's still pitch black out. Luckily, I have an Alexa Echo Dot in my bedroom upstairs to illuminate my home on command.

Or not.

"Alexa, turn on morning lights."
= nothing =
"Alexa, turn on morning lights."
= crickets =
"ALEXA! TURN ON MORNING LIGHTS!!!"
= nothing =
ALEXA? ALEXA? ALEHHHHXAAAAAAHHH?!???

It's then I notice a red glow coming from Alexa over on my dresser. That can't be good.

So I get up in a dark room... stumble over all the cat toys that have been dropped on my floor... nearly tripping into the dresser as I step on a hard compressed catnip mouse toy... then make my way into the hallway.

NOTE: Had I taken a header into the dresser, I could have been killed!

Sure enough, Alexa is all red glowy angry and ignoring me...

Alexa Red Ring Light of Death

"Why U Mad, Alexa?" I mumble as I head out into the darkened hallway... where I trip over Jake on the landing and nearly fall down the stairs.

NOTE: Had I tumbled down the stairs, I could have been killed!

I have been letting Alexa control everything for so long I forget that there are light switches... somewhere... around this place.

Eventually I make it downstairs where my "Smart Home" has turned on the lights for me and I can see again. Jake and Jenny stare at me impatiently as I dish up their breakfast, then chow down while I absent-mindedly ask Downstairs Alexa to turn on the stairway lights... and she does!

Apparently it's only Upstairs Alexa who is broken?

So I Google "ALEXA RED LIGHT" and find out she's not broken at all...

If the light ring on the top of your Echo is solid red, you have disabled the microphone feature. Alexa will not be able to respond to your requests until you have enabled the microphone feature, which will turn the solid red light off.

I missed the little microphone button with the slash through it on top of Upstairs Alexa.

THEN I remember.

Last night as I was falling asleep I was playing Jeopardy with Alexa (totally swept Tuesday's clues!). My cats wanted attention, but I was too tired to do anything. All of a sudden Alexa stops playing and I catch a glimpse of Jake on top of the dresser. I assumed he was laying on the speaker so Alexa couldn't hear me... then I fell asleep.

But that's not what happened at all!

Clearly Jake turned off the microphone so he could kill me in the morning! Remember how he tried to trip me on the stairs? Remember that? Remember? I COULD HAVE DIED!

And so... I am guessing he's more upset over the furry blanket I brought home than I realized.

Looks like I need to be watching my back for a while...

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Categories: Cats 2017Click To It: Permalink
   

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