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Funded By A Grant from Darlington Electronic Instruments

Posted on Wednesday, November 1st, 2017

Dave!It's not every day you get to see your colon on TV!

But for me, that day was today because I had a colonoscopy. And, though you're gloriously sedated on The Good Drugs, you can still watch the ass-cam as it plays on a television.

Real Genius: The Colon
Tonight we're going to look at something most of us take for granted... the colon. What does it look like?

   
And you get take-home souvenir pictures too!

Dave's Colon
So that's what it looks like! I gotta say, I have a damn sexy colon!

   
Colon cancer is one of the few cancers you can prevent if you catch polyps before they go bad. Turns out that I had one small polyp that was easily burned off. No telling if it would have ever became cancerous, but better safe than sorry, I suppose.

Despite the invasiveness of having a camera shoved up your butt, the procedure itself is not a big deal. As I said, you're mildly sedated, so you may even sleep through it.

No... where the problem lays is the preparation for the procedure.

For obvious reasons, you have to clean out your colon so that there's no... errr... "stuff" in the way of the camera. You start off with a no-fiber diet four days before your colonoscopy, then... ZOMFG... the day before your appointment... you have to drink 4 liters of this heinous stuff called "CoLyte" that CLEANS. YOU. OUT. Seriously cleans you out. As in "Stay-By-The-Toilet-Forever-Cleans-You-Out." As in "Turns-Your-Sphincter-To-Hamburger-Cleans-You-Out." It's so awful. But necessary. Because the benefits far outweigh the horrors of the prep.

So... once you turn 50, you should really get a colonoscopy.

Then look forward to your next one every five years...

Real Genius: The Colon
The gravy stain? — No, that came out.

   
The colonoscopy prep though? Not so much. Ain't nobody looking forward to that. In the meanwhile, time to watch Real Genius again for the hundredth time.

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Categories: DaveLife 2017Click To It: Permalink
   

Comments

  1. Matthew Westergard says:

    My dad died two years ago due to complications from colon cancer. He never got a colonoscopy. Glad you’re getting yours. I’ll be getting mine when I turn 50.

  2. Nicole says:

    I can’t stomach the prescription prep so I do Dulcolax first and then Miralax mixed with Gatorade. Works just as well without the disgusting drink factor. I highly recommend it when you have your next one.

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