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Posted on Friday, November 9th, 2012

Dave!Despite the fact that blogs are kind of dying now that Facebook and Twitter have takeover, Blogography still gets a considerable amount of traffic. And a good chunk of that is thanks to Google searches. My blog has been around so long and has built up so much content that I guess people can't help but run across it. And since I update every day, search engines tend to toss a lot of results my way.

As I was sitting at the airport waiting for my flight to Atlanta this afternoon, I was bored enough to check my web stats... only to find out that my visitor counts have gone through the roof. Turns out that people are Googling to find out about "gay marriage" (or, as I now like to call it, "marriage") in Washington, and being directed to an entry I wrote back in 2008.

Something tells me that what they find there is not quite what people have in mind when they click through...

Honey, I'm home! - Oh darling, it's horrible... we have new neighbors!
What's wrong? Are the black? - No! It's worse! They're gay!
Gay? Well at least their yard will be well-kept! - You don't understand, they're married!
MARRIED?!? We've built our lives on beliefs so fragile that any contrary belief will destroy them... so marriage is MEANINGLESS! It's over!!
WHAT? Where are you going? - So long... good luck with your life!
WOOOO! (partying with hookers)
WOOOO! (fucking a sheep)
WOOOO! (fucking a pig)
WOOOO! (view of earth from space)
KABOOOM!!! (the earth explodes)
THE END! (of the entire universe)

Yes, I was being a smartass about marriage equality leading to the end of the universe, but now that same-sex marriage is actually happening, there are people who seem to honestly believe it's true. This blows my mind on a number of levels. Not the least of which being that TWO DUDES OR TWO GALS GETTING MARRIED DOESN'T AFFECT YOU. And if you think it does, then that's your problem. The rest of us well-adjusted straight people will be standing over here not giving a shit about your insecurities. And I guarantee you that the people who have been waiting all their lives for the right to celebrate their love in marriage aren't giving a crap either...

Some people fall in love with someone that has the same genitals they do. Get over it. Contrary to cartoons you might find on the internet, it's not the end of the universe.

Categories: News - Politics 2012Click To It: Permalink


  1. ian says:

    I find how people come across my blog and the searches used to do so both equally hilarious and disturbing.

    I have a gay brother and some of the searches have included stuff like, ‘I want to have sex with my brother, I had sex with my brother. Hot brother and brother sex’.

    They are always very disappointed, I assume when they read the associated posts.

  2. LeSombre says:

    I like this cartoon, but couldn’t find the like button.

    My favorite part was the “OINK!”

    And I kind of hate you: even your matchstick people look better than anything I can draw! 🙂

  3. Mel says:

    Amen to that! Also, amen to finally having my state recognize my very legal, secular marriage.

  4. martymankins says:

    Sometimes a cartoon and post is that great it needs a re-post with updates for current events.

  5. You can call me, 'Sir' says:

    Best. Cartoon. Ever.

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