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Posted on Thursday, January 19th, 2012

Dave!ZOMFG! I have a cold y'all!

I'm fairly lucky in that I rarely get hit with colds or the flu. After going back through my blog, I see that the last time I had a cold was in February of 2009... or three years ago. Not surprisingly, everything I'm feeling now was pretty much summed up when I wrote about it then. LOL! LMFAO! ROTFL!

Dayquill box says "My dosage is two pills every four hours!"

Dave Says "But what if I really, REALLY don't like being sick?"

I say "not surprisingly" because my "cold routine" is always the same...

SYMPTOMS: Sinus tickle... beginnings of a sore throat.
DIAGNOSIS: Dude! You're coming down with a cold!
PRESCRIPTION: Overdose on Vitamin C, Spirulina, and Excederin PM for sleep.

SYMPTOMS: Runny nose, congestion, sore throat.
DIAGNOSIS: Dude! You totally have a cold now!
PRESCRIPTION: Overdose on Vitamin C and Spirulina. Take DayQuil to survive the work day. Take NyQuil to go comatose at night. Go on a Pine-Orange-Banana juice fast. Zinc lozenges throughout the day.

SYMPTOMS: Congestion so bad your head will explode, very runny nose, sore throat.
DIAGNOSIS: Dude! You are dying!
PRESCRIPTION: Same as day two... PLUS chocolate pudding.

SYMPTOMS: Minor residual symptoms... little bit of a runny nose left.
DIAGNOSIS: Dude! You're gonna live!
PRESCRIPTION: Regular doses of Vitamin C and Spirulina. NO cold medications.

Now... if I'm lucky, Day Four is the end of it. I wake up on Day Five and am pretty much cured. But every once in a while, I get "The Cold Cure Fake-Out" which means your cold comes back stronger and harder than ever on Day Five. In which case I'm screwed. Colds like that can hang on for weeks.

Right now I am at the end of Day Three. I can already feel my cold breaking, and have stopped taking all cold medication (I find it's good to stop as soon as possible, because cold meds seem to prolong a cold if taken too long). Which means tomorrow I'll start recovering. That's awesome, because two days of misery is more than enough.

But then there's Day Five. Where I'm either cured or screwed.

Now there's a Saturday to look forward to.

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Categories: DaveLife 2012Click To It: Permalink


  1. Invader_Stu says:

    I think this shows a great idea for a get well card. Get well ‘soon’ is too generic. There should be cards that read, Get well on day 4 :p

  2. Neil T. says:

    Zinc is about the only thing that is proven to beat back a cold. Vitamin C may help ease the symptoms, as will paracetamol-based painkillers, but it won’t make the cold go away.

    Also, generic unbranded paracetamol works just as well as premium brands, if you’re trying to save money!

    • Dave2 says:

      According to the research, the purpose of Vitamin C in large quantities is to reduce the duration of a cold… it doesn’t really do anything to eliminate or ease symptoms. Apparently it doesn’t work for everybody, but it definitely works for me. Before I started the Vitamin C overdoses, my typical cold was 6-8 days instead of the 3-4 it is now.

  3. Fogspinner says:

    So I rant on this to everyone and I swear it works. I have a million things I’ve tried it on and since A) I have no immune system (but shiny new lungs!) and B) was terminally ill before, most OTC/hoax/hippy cures don’t even begin to touch my illnesses.

    1T honey
    1T unpasteurized vinegar (I use braggs)
    1C hot water

    Vinegar and honey are both antibacterials and the honey will sooth your throat. The unpasteurized vinegar with the muddy looking mother in it has TONS of vitamins and minerals your body needs too!(Oddly, I found this mix when looking for a “cure” for my sour stomach. It works really well for that, though you wouldn’t think adding acid would help.)

  4. martymankins says:

    I caught my wife’s cold, which she had for over 4 weeks. The cough and chest congestion is the worst. I fought if off for so long, but being in Vegas for 4 days without following my routine of antioxidants did me in.

    I need to remember to add in the chocolate pudding next time I get really bad cold symptoms.

  5. Oh noes. I hope you get to feeling better by Day 4. Or before!

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