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Winterized

Posted on Wednesday, October 13th, 2010

Dave!This morning there was frost on my windshield. Not thick enough or strong enough that I had to scrape it off, a quick swipe of the wipers and it was gone, but it was a horrifying reminder that winter is just around the corner. Not that this is a big deal to me. I've lived in a climate with winter for as long as I can remember. A part of me actually likes the snow and chilly days.

The problem is with travel. Winter makes an already shitty travel experience even worse. In some instances, much worse. You never know whether or not an airport is going to shutter, or a mountain pass is going to close, or some other craziness is going to descend like Bill O'Reilly and fuck up your day in some incomprehensibly stupid way. It's for this reason that I avoid traveling from November through February.

The fact that I already have four trips scheduled during that time is beside the point.

Which brings me to the actual point... I am sick to death of the rampant hypocrisy I'm exposed to on a daily basis...

hypocrisy |hiˈpäkrisē| • noun ( pl. -sies) • the practice of claiming to have moral standards or beliefs to which one's own behavior does not conform; pretense.

I will be the first to admit that it's entirely my fault. I watch television, I read the news, I drop by blogs, I interact with people... all of which puts me in danger of being exposed to lethal levels of hypocrisy. You simply cannot escape it. Especially during the mid-term political elections in these here United States of America.

My first serving of hypocrisy came with breakfast as I watched a reporter interview people at a "Tea Party" rally where this elderly woman was railing hard and fast against the evils of "government-run socialized health care"... all while holding up a sign that says "DON'T TOUCH MY MEDICARE" (which is hypocrisy laced with delicious irony). I kept waiting for the reporter to ask her if she understood that Medicare is a form of "socialized medicine" (Socialism Light!) which is (surprise!) run by the government, but it never came. Instead she rambled on about how "the government can just keep their damn hands off my Medicare!" (presumably this means they aren't to hand it to her directly, but instead leave it on her bedside table?). I just sat there trying to keep my brain from exploding all while wondering if this ignorant bitch had a clue what the ramifications would be if the government puled out of the health industry altogether as she was advocating. Not only would she lose her Medicare, but all publicly-funded medical research through the National Institute of Health (from which she undoubtedly benefits) would also be lost. And don't get me started on all those government tax-break subsidies given to employers for their company health insurance programs. Honestly, it's not that I begrudge people who don't want a public option for health care, that's perfectly fine. But don't be such a hypocritical ignorant asshole while doing it.

Unfortunately, hypocritical ignorant assholes are the flavor of the day, as I got it served up for lunch and dinner too.

Lunchtime hypocrisy was delivered by the USDA "Health Pyramid" on my cereal box* which suggests 75% of our diet should be grains, fruits, and vegetables... all while knowing full well that only a mere 15% of government food subsidies go towards these consumables (75% of government food subsidies go to the beef and dairy industry, so enjoy that cheap-ass Big Mac!). It's not that I mind our government making food affordable (a boy's gotta eat!), it's just the blatant hypocrisy of telling us to eat one type of food while subsidizing another which I find hard to swallow. So to speak.

Dinnertime hypocrisy was served up by Microsoft with their Windows Phone 7 "it's time for a phone to save us from our phones" ads. I have no idea what this is supposed to mean. Taken literally, it's the very definition of hypocrisy, but I don't know that it's meant to be taken literally? So what could it be? Windows Phone 7 is so awesome that you never have to use it? From past Microsoft phone development history I'd say it's more likely that it's so unusable that you never want to use it... but whatever. I have an iPhone which saves me from MicrosoftPhone, so at least my Apple-branded hypocrisy looks good.

So...

Hypocrisy. It's what's for breakfast, lunch, and dinner!

And, unlike frost on your car windows, that shit sticks like super glue and is not so easily scraped away.

   
*Yes, I eat cereal for lunch. Cereal is delicious, and makes the perfect meal any time!

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Categories: News - Politics 2010Click To It: Permalink
   

Comments

  1. metalmom says:

    I liked this post. I thought I was the only one who noticed the “Medicare Matrons” who seem to be all over the news railing against government healthcare. You say it all nicer than I can.

  2. RW says:

    There are no words to describe the political air in our country any more. I’m out of explanations.

    I heard one GOP candidate explain that the teaching of Creationism in school alongside evolution was a constitutional right.

    Poor said, sick, distracted country…

  3. martymankins says:

    You know people are not thinking clearly when they rant against something they don’t want but are currently getting. The pure definition of hypocrisy.

    As for the frost on the windows, that would be my back window the last few days here in Utah. Cold is coming. This is when I think of moving to the southern hemisphere where snow is a street term for cocaine.

  4. Suebob says:

    Don’t you understand? It’s all because Obama is a socialist Islamic terrorist!!

    I got my Microsoft phone.

  5. Oh I’d eat cereal every meal of every day.

  6. Sybil Law says:

    Your Bill O’Reilly/ weather simile made my night. :)

  7. MsChick74 says:

    I wish it would get frosty here. I”m of it being sunny and 90. It’s easier to avoid hypocrisy than it is the heat.

  8. Erin says:

    I eat cereal as a snack. I would say that I do that to stay healthy and to make up for the fact that, more often than not, my breakfast consists of Pepsi and Doritos but my favorite cereal is Frosted Flakes. And sometimes I put extra sugar on them.

  9. Walt Lansberry says:

    When I see these protests, I am reminded of the big welfare reform protests of the 80’s and early 90’s where farmers we so ticked off about “all this money being given to people and the incentive not to work” all at the hands of social welfare. A few days after the sweeping reform passed the same folks were hit with the reality the subsidies they were getting all along was part of the welfare reform and were soon gone. Surprise!

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