Once again my rant is going to have to be postponed, because I am just so frickin' overrun with drama that I can barely function.
Today the blogosphere (or, to be more accurate, a small section of the blogosphere) imploded. If you run in the same blog circles as I do, you know what I'm talking about. If you don't, it's no big loss, because drama is drama regardless of the details. Suffice to say there was a very disturbing, very public, turn of events that ended badly. This had a ripple effect throughout The People's Republic of Blogistan* where a great many people were left with dropped jaws saying "what the fuck?"
For the most part, I am unsympathetic to the bloggers involved. If you are going to disclose every frakin' detail of your sordid affair to the entire internet... but then disappear when things turn to shit... well, people are going to speculate, gossip, and discuss the situation because you invited them to. And yet, to say I am unsympathetic does not mean I wish anybody ill-will. On the contrary, I am hoping with all my heart that everybody comes through this okay and can find happiness once again. All I ever want is for people to be happy and live in peace.
But enough ambiguous chatter, let's talk about me.
I am the polar opposite of a life-sharing blogger.
I do not discuss my family, my offline friends, my work, my relationships, or anything that's truly personal. This blog is all at once a highly superficial yet deeply reflective look at my life. Or at least (being honest here) the parts of my life I choose to share.
Take yesterday, for instance. It was a very, very bad day. But all the horribleness revolved around things I choose not to blog about, so I posted a DaveToon of my world raining shit and hoped that people understand this is all I have to say about the situation. Fortunately, most do.
But today's events have me thinking back to a conversation I had with my good friend Bad Robert a few weeks back.
Robert observed that I invite my readers to speculate about the Big Picture because I leave them hanging for details. At first I protested, but (and this is the thing about Bad Robert's brilliance) I quickly realized he's absolutely right. For everything I don't reveal or discuss, it's like opening a big door towards speculation. It's human nature.
So am I really any better off than those who choose to share their dirty laundry?
People read about my frequent travels and speculate that my career is everything from hired assassin to jewel thief to gigolo to terrorist. The truth is far less interesting but, since I'm not talking about it, I might as well be inviting other people to guess...
FACT CHECK: I'm a graphic designer. I fly around a lot for all aspects of my work, and often add-on extra personal time to my trips because I love to travel and see the world. I am, for the most part, forbidden from sharing details of my work, and so I don't. It's really as simple as that.
People read my joking around about being 20% gay, don't read about any girlfriend, and speculate that I'm 100% gay. Again, the truth is far less interesting but, since I'm not talking about it, I might as well be inviting other people to guess...
FACT CHECK: I'm straight. If I were gay I would have no problem being the most "out" homosexual you know, because my friends, family, co-workers, job, and beliefs just wouldn't care. There's no reason for me to be in the closet if I were gay, and I wouldn't be. Just because I don't blog about women in my life doesn't mean they don't exist.
And so on.
This is not to claim that I don't ever reveal myself on my blog.
There are occasional glimpses into my life that I consider highly personal.
There are other times I've written an entry and realize that it tells a lot about who I am even though it actually says very little.
Sometimes I surprise myself by drawing a simple cartoon that reveals me more deeply than any words could ever express.
Occasional controversial topics do enter into the fray from time to time as you would expect them to.
Though people tend to forget, I have blogged about sexual encounters, albeit in a way that admits to nothing.
And, of course, women and romance are not entirely off-limits, I just don't get too close.
Even my family turns up on rare occasions, if people were to take a minute to notice.
And so on.
Is it better to reveal everything and risk repercussions?
Or is it better to reveal very little and risk speculation?
I honestly cannot say.
Something tells me that this would get a little too personal.
* The People's Republic of Blogistan, courtesy of mah Hilly-Sue.