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Day Five: Warszawa

Posted on Wednesday, January 30th, 2008

Dave!Ooh look at me! Thanks to Germanwings Airlines* and Flugnummer (flight number) 720, I'm someplace I've never been before... Warszawa (Warsaw), Poland!

Today officially marks the end of what I affectionately refer to as "HellQuarter"... the months of October, November, December, and January... where I am at my busiest. Sure I am busy the rest of the year too, but this is the time where it's the worst. This is the time of year I consider wearing adult diapers so I don't have to waste precious minutes running to the toilet. The problem is that I can't find anybody to come change my diaper, and I'm sure as hell am not going to be the one to do it. I already have my hands full with my monkey...

Bad Monkey Diaper

This is the reason why I haven't had much time to comment on your blogs or reply to comments on my own blog (which I've just learned is a major pet-peeve of Avitable's, so I guess I'm not invited to his Halloween party this year). It was a daily struggle just to keep writing in Blogography and stay current with my blogroll, so something had to give. But I still read and treasured every comment I got during HellQuarter, so I hope that counts for something.

Anyway, my original plan after work was done was to go to Bucharest, Romania for the Grand Opening of the Hard Rock Cafe there. But the opening date had already slipped once or twice at the time I needed to buy my tickets, and I was worried it would slip again, so I didn't want to risk it (the cafe ended up opening January 20th, darn-it!). Looking at the big map of Hard Rocks, I took note of those properties I haven't yet visited in Europe (Oslo, Gothenburg, Warsaw, Malta, Moscow, and Gran Canaria)... then selected the location with the cheapest airfare, which was Warsaw (probably because it's the closest). And here I am.

In a happy stroke of luck, my friend and fellow Hard Rock enthusiast, Perry (who was my partner-in-crime for our now-infamous Hard Rock Run in 2004) was able to join me for dinner at the beautiful Warsaw Hard Rock, which is in the massive new Złote Tarasy complex that's across from the very cool Palace of Culture and Science building...

Warsaw Palace

Tomorrow we're going to tour a bit of the city, which promises to be interesting. It's always fun to explore someplace you haven't been before.

In the meanwhile, I'm going to try and make the most of my internet access, which costs $40 for 24 hours at my hotel here. I had thought perhaps I might have better luck with the OVERWHELMINGLY FUCKING TRAGIC STATE OF THE US DOLLAR in Poland, but apparently I'm wrong about that. Our currency is worthless everywhere.

Stupid economy.


* By the way... if you are looking for cheap inter-European air travel in or out of Germany, I highly, highly recommend Germanwings. Despite their rock-bottom prices and lack of assigned seating, they are still one of the best airlines I've ever flown. The planes are super-clean and impeccably maintained. The staff and cabin crew are exceedingly friendly and helpful. All of the seven times I've flown with them, my flights have departed and arrived on schedule. All-in-all, a wonderful airline I'm thrilled to be flying.

And, on that note, I think I'm off to bed now, where I'll be dreaming of Köln's Spritzringe donuts.

Categories: Travel 2008Click To It: Permalink


  1. Göran says:

    why wear diapers? you have a laptop and wireless, sit at the toilet while working! 🙂

  2. Lewis says:

    And you want me NOT to comment after your bold and brazen “Map of Hard Rocks” comment? Yeah, right. I’m not so sure I’m exactly right for the job (I think I’m overqualified), but I may be interested in applying for the diaper-changing position.
    Give Warsaw my rememberances. I think of the German army meeting the Soviet one there…on the river. And the huge Jewish ghetto (largest one, I believe). And the time that I actually sang in the old town square. I loved it there.

  3. Miss Britt says:

    And now you’re in Poland.

    Listen Dave, if you’re ever looking for a trophy date to be a sugar daddy to – I travel well.

    I’m just sayin’.

  4. Too bad Germanwings can’t open up a passel of flights in the US. Wait, no, never mind. If they did, they’d start to suck. So, nah.

  5. Beth says:

    Dude, you are a serious HRC junkie. Do you always order the same meal or is there variety to your twisted ways?? 🙂

  6. Avitable says:

    Dave, you get a pass, but only because you’re so good at oral sex.

  7. Bec says:

    Germanwings has a clown on their website. A clown! and now I have to try and sleep thinking about the clown and the ridiculous prices!

    But…ooo… they are cheap…! And they fly from Edinburgh and Stanstead! Ooo…

  8. bogup says:

    I still can’t get over that donut pic from yesterday and want one so badly and know there isn’t one like it within 5,000 miles from here!
    Warsaw should be a wonderful experience even if you don’t eat any sausages.
    Don’t comment on this post. Just don’t.

  9. Have fun. Glad things are going to slow down )(relatively speaking) for you in the near future.

  10. Hilly says:

    I’m happy that you made it to Poland safely and even more happy (for you) that the hell is over. But this whole diaper thing makes me giggle so keep that on the back burner for ALWAYS okay? 😉

  11. Dave2 says:

    Göran… I’d have to install a refrigerator/freezer and a microwave in my bathroom so I could eat there as well. In one end, and out the other… all in the same room!

    Lewis… And where, pray tell, did this diaper-changing experience come from? I’ll sing a few bars of Madonna’s “Holiday” while I’m in the Old Town Square to remember you to Poland.

    Miss Britt… In order to be a sugar daddy abroad, you have to be using currency that’s actually worth something. Right now, the only sugar I could send your way would be the free piece of chocolate they put by your bedside table here in my hotel!

    Granddaughter… Actually, they’d probably still be great, but really, really expensive. I think the reason they stay so cheap is that they never really stray too far from home. The longest flight they have is something like three hours to Moscow.

    Beth… I rotate between five different meals, depending on my mood. There’s really only two vegetarian options (veggie burger and veggie Spring rolls) but many others that can be adjusted to be vegetarian (by leaving off the bacon bits, or whatever).

    Avitable… So now you are going to be PAYING me to attend your Halloween party? That kind of expert service doesn’t come for free…

    Bec… I think the clown is there because of the Köln Carnival coming up. There are scary clowns everywhere in the city. It’s like a nightmare… but with really good donuts.

    Bogup… Hey, I have to find some way of making use of my FORTY FUCKING DOLLARS INTERNET CONNECTION!! Ouch. 🙂

    Absurdist… Yes, it will be nice to finally not feel guilty about going to the bathroom!

    Hilly… Yeah, yeah… it’s all funny until I actually start wearing the diapers! Then it’s just scary. 🙂

  12. Tobi says:

    Why is it that everywhere but Canada has ridiculously cheap flights? Asia has so many cheap airlines too, so much nicer to travel when it doesn’t cost you hundreds of dollars to get anywhere quickly.

  13. Mr. Fabulous says:

    I don’t think Adam likes “donuts” to be spelled that way, either…

  14. Avitable says:

    Same payment as last time – unlimited cheesy fiesta potatoes!

  15. diane says:

    *claps hands* So glad hell quarter is over!! No self-flagellation, please. We all get busy. 🙂

  16. I’m so glad the “hell” is over for now, and that you’re out enjoying some new adventures.

  17. Karl says:

    Poland, wow. I’m so jealous of you and your travels. Even if you do wear diapers.

  18. I read this post this morning, and again just right now after coming back from the theatre… I still laughed my ass off.

    Aside from my giggles – at least you get to be in a new country! It’s worth the $40/hr for a new IP address, I say.

  19. Dave2 says:

    Tobi… The USA isn’t much better. I’ve yet to find $20 flights that will take me across a state, let alone to another country!

    Mr. Fab… That’s my preferred spelling, so I’ll just have to risk Avitable’s donut wrath. 🙂

    Avitable… I am so there!

    Diane… Yes, but few people consider wearing diapers because of it! That’s worth a little bit of self-flagellation, isn’t it?

    Bombshell… Nobody is happier about that than me, so thanks!

    Karl… No no… I only CONTEMPLATED wearing diapers. I just don’t like the added bulk they add to my profile…

    CuriosityKiller… Any cost is worth the price for my dear readers!

  20. Wayne says:

    I was wondering when my habit of printing my own money was going to bite me in the behind. But luckily for me, it bit you and the rest of the country instead! yay me!

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