Blogography Logo



Posted on Friday, December 28th, 2007

Dave!I'm not sick, but I feel like I am.

For the third day in a row, I've barely been able to get motivated enough to climb out of bed in the morning. It's like I have no energy, and am tired all the time. When I was finally awake enough to start working at 8:30, I was in a zombie-like state and could barely function. A simple project that should have taken 30 minutes ended up taking over an hour to complete. Worried that I might never leave my hotel room, I forced myself out so I could have a "black bean burger" at Chili's. It was delicious, but didn't help. All I wanted to do was go back to bed...

Dave Malaise

But instead I spent the next six hours working my ass off in an attempt to get caught up before the weekend.

To be honest, I don't know that I'm much further along than I was when I started. Being so badly unproductive is really depressing, and I'm getting worried that I'm not going to snap out of this funk any time soon.

I need to hire somebody to give me a really good bitch-slapping.

Unfortunately, looking under "B" in the Yellow Pages hasn't turned up any results.

I suppose this must be a job for Craigslist?

Categories: DaveLife 2007Click To It: Permalink


  1. Lewis says:

    I hate to hear it when anyone is sick, let alone a good friend. Really sorry! As for the slapping the bitch, just let me know when. I typically charge for those sorts of things, though. But we may be able to work something out. You taking your vitamins each day? I’ve got a whole plethora (gosh, that’s a big word) of vitamins that I take daily.

  2. Suzy says:

    If you find someone, send them down to LA after they’re done with you and I’ll split the cost.

  3. Laurel says:

    As many members of my family will attest, if there’s bitch-slapping to be done, I’m your gal. I do love to travel, so perhaps we can work out a plan…
    Perhaps a cocktail (or five) and a good night’s sleep?

  4. Michelle says:

    Maybe it’s jetlag. I’m sure you’ll be back to normal in a couple of days. But maybe you should pay attention to your body and take it easy for a few days.

  5. It doesn’t suprise me that you feel like shit. I mean, look at the hours you keep. You are manic without the increased dopamine issue. (You are lucky in that respect).

    I would imagine that you have crash days based upon the frenetic hours that you keep.

    Do what I do. When you have a day like that, don’t try to force yourself to do things. It’s not in the cards for you, my friend. Just sleep it off. Your body knows what it needs. You, apparently, don’t. 🙂

  6. Dagny says:

    I thought that Hilly Sue already had that job. If not, then yeah, Craigslist would be the place to go.

  7. Kyra says:

    Are you kidding? I’m sure we have plenty of bitch-slapper-professionals right here!

    I’m sorry you are feeling this way…. unfortunately, I am too. It’s awful. I just want to bundle myself into a corner and not speak to anyone for days. Sick but not sick, exactly. Blah.

    Maybe it’s the “calm” before the new years party night or something? (except we don’t go anywhere or do anything… but I could totally see you and bad monkey riding the ball on the countdown!)

  8. Mary Dawn says:

    dood, Kentucky Girl would so be on that bitch slappin’ for ya

  9. Maybe you need to look under “K” for “Kick my ass and make me get more rest?” Perhaps “G” for “Get a new job that doesn’t involve traveling so much and therefore allows me to get into a regular routine?”

    Seriously, sweetheart, I worry about you. Selfishly, I want to be able to read Blogography well into my 90s and I’m worried that you’re working yourself into an early visit to the “Great Bloggers Meetup in the Sky.” So take care of yourself, damn-it!

  10. Hilly Sue says:

    Yanno…the ORANGE COUNTY Craigslist is always good for a free bitch slapping. You just have to find the one nice girl here who won’t slap you too terribly hard ;).

    Seriously though, I am sorry you are feeling such malaise and hope a little sunshine comes into your days very soon :).

  11. sizzle says:

    that’s how i felt before i got the fever and then fainted- careful! i know it’s not really your usual way of doing things but maybe you just need to stay in bed for at least one day?

  12. Lisa says:

    You need a six pack of Red Bull, a pound of chocolate covered espresso beans and some protien bars. That should kick start you.

    I know when I’m feeling run down it’s because I’m not eating right and not taking vitamins.

  13. Wayne says:

    I thought “malaise” was French for “badass”. Turns out I’m wrong.

  14. diane says:

    I’m beginning to wonder if there’s some viral menangitis floating over the West Coast (you, Sizzle’s comment). It’s either that or the winter blahs…

  15. iddly says:

    A bitch-slap is a Dave-rating of 1 or 2?

  16. yellojkt says:

    I had a stomach flu on Christmas Day, so I feel for you. Get better soon.

  17. Whit says:

    Sounds like mono.

  18. Robin says:

    Feel better soon!

  19. jenny says:

    Hope you feel better soon!
    Come on down and I will bitch slap ya,
    jenny from jennyschickenshack

  20. Avitable says:

    When Mario Kart comes to the Wii and they have online gameplay, I’ll bitch slap you with some red turtle shells.

  21. Patty says:

    I think it’s the season for no energy. I find myself wanting to sleeep way longer than usual even though I’m not sick any more. Hope you are feeling better soon! I wish we could get some damn sunshine around here in Washington….it bums me out!!

  22. SJ says:

    I’ve been feeling this exact same way for almost a month. The only thing that makes me feel better is lots of filtered water and sitting outside in the sunshine, and even then it’s only temporary. I’m thinking it must be SAD.

Add a Comment


I love comments! However, all comments are moderated, and won't appear until approved. Are you an abusive troll with nothing to contribute? Don't bother. Selling something? Don't bother. Spam linking? Don't bother.
PLEASE NOTE: My comment-spam protection requires JavaScript... if you have it turned off or are using a mobile device without JavaScript, commenting won't work. Sorry.



Your personal information is optional. Email addresses are never shown, and are only used by me if a public reply would be too personal or inappropriate here. The URL link to your web site or blog will be provided, so only fill this in if you want people to visit!



Blogography is a place to learn and grow by exposing yourself to the mind of David Simmer II, a brilliant commentator on world events and popular culture (or so he claims).
Dave FAQ:
Frequently Asked Questions
Dave Contact:
Blogography Webfeeds:
Atom Entries Feed
Comments Feed
translate me
flags of the world!
lost & found
Search Blogography:
thrice fiction
Thrice Fiction Magazine - March, 2011 - THE END
I'm co-founder of Thrice Fiction magazine. Come check us out!
hard rock moment
Visit DaveCafe for my Hard Rock Cafe travel journal!
travel picto-gram
Visit my travel map to see where I have been in this world!
Blogography Badge
Atom Syndicate Badge
Comments Syndicate Badge
Apple Safari Badge
Pirate's Booty Badge
Macintosh Badge
All content copyright ©2003-2022
by David Simmer II
Creative Commons License
This weblog is licensed under
a Creative Commons License.
ssl security