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Posted on Wednesday, July 18th, 2007

Dave!So there I was, waking up after a good night's sleep* so I could check my email, when Harry Potter dropped by for an unwelcome visit.

The very first email I opened was sent to my Blogography address, and had a subject line of "Hard Rock Cafe Hong Kong." Thinking that somebody had news of yet another unfortunate cafe closing, I opened it up only to find that is was a photo collage of pages from a book with notes scrawled above them. But not just any book, it was Harry Potter and The Deathly Hallows, the final book in the series (not yet released).

This was completely baffling. From appearances, the person sending the photo had fully intended to spoil the book for me. They knew me. They knew I like the Hard Rock Cafe. And they used an email subject they knew I was likely to open. About the only thing they didn't know is that I don't care about Harry Potter, and have read only the first book, part of the second, and made it through the third only by skipping large chunks of it. So seeing all these spoilers meant nothing. The sender's address looked disposable, so I didn't even bother replying.

A couple of emails later, and it's a comment notification for my blog... that turns out to be nothing more than a dozen Harry Potter spoilers typed out in ALL-CAPS (left anonymously, of course).


Why would anybody work so hard to ruin a book that I'm not even interested in? I can only assume that I am not alone, and soon the entire internet will be plagued by juvenile assholes with nothing better to do than try to ruin the ending of the book for people. I just wish that I could figure out what in the heck they have to gain from this. If making other people unhappy is their incentive, that's pretty frakin' lame.

Sleepy Dave Teddy

*Last night I adopted drastic measures so I could finally get some sleep... PILLS! Two sleeping pills, a melatonin, and a Midnite, all combined into a sleep cocktail that managed to knock me out for an entire seven hours. I worry about trying this kind of thing too often, but it's nice to know I can get some drug-induced rest from time to time.

And now, before I go, why not head on over to NYC Watchdog's Cereal Wednesday... not only is he one of the best-dressed vloggers out there, but you could win a box of Krusty-O's cereal!

Categories: Blogging 2007, BooksClick To It: Permalink


  1. Jay Sewik says:

    That just blows my mind that people would do something like that. Internet bullies suck. My wife has taken to treating the internet like a leper until the last book comes out and she reads it for fear of someone spoiling it for her.

  2. ally says:

    i don’t care if someone drops me a spoiler because i’m going to read the book anyway. i just dropped by because i’m digging those pj’s!!!

  3. Mooselet says:

    Some people truly have nothing better to do. Glad you got some sleep.

  4. Amanda says:

    aw the duckie pj’s are so cute.

    I didn’t want to resort to sleeping pills, but I find that drug-induced sleep is better than no sleep at all

  5. whit says:

    Shoot, I thought you liked Harry Potter. I can’t believe I wasted 8 hours sending you spoilers.

    Dude, the best stuff I’ve found for inducing sleep, besides lots of liquor, is Percogesic. It’s a pain killer/muscle relaxer. The stuff relaxes you to sleep and you wake up clean and fresh. Good over the counter stuff.

  6. Hilly says:

    I think I’m a little in love with this peejay picture…it is wayyy too cute!

    I think I’m not a little in love with those assjackets who have nothing better to do than spoil someone else’s fun, even when it’s not fun.

  7. Michael says:

    I must say, Jay, I agree with you wife. 😛 Even the one place I thought might be safe may not turn out to be so, so I’m avoiding all the HP thread there at all costs.

  8. Wayne says:

    I wish someone would do that for me, but instead of Harry Potter, I want them to spoil tomorrow’s Lotto.

  9. minimimi says:

    nice jammies 😉

  10. lostcity says:

    Here is Australia, all the major newspapers printed the final sentence of the book as it was seen on the internet (I am assuming it was the same photos that you were sent). No Spoilers ahead warnings. No time to turn away. Now all I can do is hope that the postings are all fake. It is like a reviewer giving away the end of a movie in their review 🙁 blah for those of us who wanted to wait!

  11. Avitable says:


    Oh wait.

    I haven’t read the last book yet.

  12. delmer says:

    I just saw the most recent movie. I’ve no idea what it’s called. “Harry Potter …” and something I just don’t care about.

    I went as my middle child wanted to go. He wants to go again and I’ve suggested that the week he’s with his mother would be the perfect time to see it again.

    I just don’t get it.

    They need to add some Hobbits to the story. Maybe some Federation officers. Hotters Girls. Something.

  13. karla says:

    If any asshat tries to ruin it for me like that I am going to reach trough the net, grab their nuts and wring them out like two small dishrags. That’s just crappy.

    As for drug induced sleep, I try not to take anything either, but the other night my friend gave me a muscle relaxer for my tense, sore back and it KNOCKED ME OUT. I slept the sleep of the dead and righteous. Or possibly the dead and the evil. Whatever, I slept WELL.

  14. Humor Girl says:

    There was a huge blowout on MSNBC last night about it.

  15. hannita says:

    I’m with most of the other women. The toon of Little Dave in the ducky pjs is ridiculously cute. Sorry the sleep is not going well without the pills.

  16. kilax says:

    I was really hoping this would turn into a Harry Potter bashing post! Damn!

  17. Tracie says:

    Lil Dave in PJ’s is just way too freakin’ cute!

    I’ve read the first HP only. It’s weird that someone would try to spoil it for you……. especially since you don’t care.

  18. Contrary to the post title, that is one of the cutest Dave cartoons ever.

  19. sizzle says:

    the lameness of people astounds me. why can’t people get more productive hobbies?!

  20. Dan says:

    Not to ruin anything for you, but Darth Vader is Luke’s father…

  21. Catherine says:

    I love how the little teddy bear is kind of sad. Like, “My poor human, so tried is his patience. *sigh* “

  22. Bre says:

    That kind of stuff makes me really angry. I know they feel like they’re “damming the man,” but they’re really ruining things for folks! I’ve gotten hit awfully hard with HPSpoiler spam and it’s just plain mean!

  23. Robin says:

    Cute PJs!

    Maybe you would sleep better if you wore those jammies.

    Any chance we will be seeing those PJs on the Artificial Duck site soon?

  24. Lewis says:

    I can set you up with Ambien or Lunesta anytime you want it. Combined with Benadryl (not advised), or a drink (not advised), it does work well. Very well. Too well? Yawn.

  25. Lynda says:

    Are you sure they were real spoilers?

    I saw NYC Watchdogs shirt on Cereal Wednesday, and came to visit.

  26. undisciplined says:

    I’m glad there’s someone else not sucked into the cult of Potter!

  27. bogup says:

    I’ll take a pair of those Artificial Duck (minus the wind-up key) PJ’s X-Lg, whatever the price.
    Hope they come in flannel.

  28. mikeo says:

    Dave, this will only upset you more!
    Hope you got some deserved sleep!

    iphone gone from our existence…

  29. Dan says:

    Oh, and I got an iPhone before you!

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