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Shutdown

Posted on Friday, February 23rd, 2007

Dave!Why is it that crazy crap always seems to happen on my birthday each year? Sometimes it's a good thing... the first version of MacOS X was released on March 24 back in 2001, for example. But usually it's bizarre crap like a fish-painting festival* back in 2000, or the Jonesboro Massacre back in 1998, or the Exon Valdez oil spill back in 1989. Not the best birthday material.

Today I find out that this year, March 24, 2007, it's going to be INTERNATIONAL SHUTDOWN DAY. The idea is that this will be a global experiment to determine whether or not people can cope without computers for just one day. They ask you to "shut down your computer and find out!"...

Shutdown Day

To which I reply "go frak yourself."

Seriously. What kind of stupid-ass shit is this? The entire world is run by computers now-a-days. Are air-traffic controllers supposed to shutdown their computers for the day to see if airline pilots can "cope" with crashing into each other? Do hospitals shut down the computers controlling heart monitors and crap to see if patients can "cope" with going into cardiac arrest? Even if they are just talking about shutting off your personal computer for the day, what is this going to prove? Could I go a day without my computer? Of course I could. Would I ever want to? No. What would be the point? To find out how many people can manage to be computer-free without going insane? Who cares?

I mean, I suppose I could spend my birthday getting drunk off my ass so I wouldn't care about turning on my computer, but it would be kind of rude to ignore the thousands of birthday wishes emailed to me that day. Besides, some of my best blogging is done when I am drunk off my ass, and I can't imagine denying my millions of fans such a treat. It happens all too rarely.

This year it's "International Shutdown Day" — what's next? International Don't Eat Tacos Day? International Don't Flush The Toilet Day? International Eat With Your Feet Day? Who comes up with this stupid crap, and why does it always seem to happen on my birthday?

I feel very strongly that March 24 should instead be "International No Stupid Shit Day"... in perpetuity... so I never have to face this ridiculous dumbassery on my birthday ever again...

No Stupid Shit Day

That would be the best birthday present ever!

Of course, the one benefit to not turning on your computer for a day would be that you don't have to hear about stuff like "International Shutdown Day." Maybe I've acted too quickly here...

   

*At first I thought it might be kind of cool to have a painting created by a fish from the fish-painting festival. You'd take a fish, dip him in water-soluable, non-toxic paint, then let him flop around on the canvas to create art. After he had created something suitably interesting, you'd wash off the fish and release him back into the wild. Unfortunately, this is not quite what the organizers had in mind. They were quite adamant that the fish used to create the art would be DEAD. Oddly enough, you do not paint ON the fish as the name implies, but instead use a dead fish to paint WITH. Why anybody would want to do this is beyond my ability to fathom, however.


Categories: DaveLife 2007Click To It: Permalink
   

Comments

  1. The Chad says:

    That is one of the dumbest things ive ever heard. yeah, im gonna turn off my computers becouse some dumbass thinks it’d be something cool to try for a day. yeah, i go without computers all the time. I call it going camping.

  2. Jill says:

    Who comes up with these weird days, anyway? Is there a special club you have to join to implement them or something? And why don’t they ever come up with anything good – like Eat Ice Cream for Breakfast Day or something?

    I second the motion for NSSD on March 24th… You deserve to have a Happy Birthday :)

  3. Mooselet says:

    Can I survive without my personal computer for 1 day? Of course I can – we went on a 2 week holiday last year and I did just fine. But if I am home, why the hell should I go without? What will it prove? Just because we can do a thing doesn’t mean we should do a thing.

    Dumbasses…

  4. ms. sizzle says:

    i think karl is behind the “eat with your feet day” you can take that one up with him. ;)

    as i read what shutdown day was, i gasped. a day without my computer?! definitely, i would agree, “go fuck yourself” is the best response.

  5. stephanie says:

    I’d vote for a no stupid shit day! If ONLY!!

    And a very happy early birthday to you :)

  6. MRKisThatKid says:

    I was still a 100% windows user when OSX first reared its head. At the time I got the impression that mac users generally hated it, for being slow and unfinished. I seem to remember it didn’t even have dvd writer support for about a year.

    So as you mention the historic event, I wonder what your experience was?

  7. Hilly says:

    “it would be kind of rude to ignore the thousands of birthday wishes emailed to me that day”

    *snort*

    Your humility is hot!

  8. Laurence says:

    I saw the video yesterday. I wanted to say what you said today.
    But, I can’t post now… You make it so much better than I can do !!! Aaaah… I am feeling so depressive… Aaaargh !!! :-)

  9. rachel says:

    I CAN go without my computer for a day but I’m not going to. If I turn it on and work I make money. If I don’t turn it on and don’t work I spend money. What kinda sense does that make?

  10. Dave2 says:

    The Chad… Wait a second… you would go camping on my birthday? This is just wrong. You should be having a Dave Birthday satellite party on the 24th! The entire world needs to share in the celebration of my birth! :-)

    Jill… Ever day is “Eat Ice Cream for Breakfast Day” to me!

    Mooselet… What kills me is trying to figure out what this is trying to prove… that we are 100% reliant and addicted to computers? Well, duh! :-)

    Ms. Sizzle… Karl’s “Eat With Your Feet Day” was for a noble cause… it was a birthday dare! Now if somebody were to DARE me to not use a computer for 24 hours… that would be entirely okay, because at least then there would be a reason for it!

    Stephanie… One down… a few billion to go. Wow, this “No Stupid Shit Day” is really starting to catch on!

    MRK… I had been beta-testing MacOS X months before it went on sale, and can’t recall ever not having CD burning available. This is new to me! What’s amazing is that even though it was a bit slow and seemed unfinished in places, it still kicked the shit out of Windows. In fact, I’d almost rather use MacOS X v1.0 instead of Windows Vista. :-D

    Hilly… I was being totally humble here… actually, it’s “tens of thousands of birthday wishes!” :-P

    Laurence… That’s me… speaking for the entire world again! :-)

    Rachel… No sense. Hence my bid for “No Stupid Shit Day” which makes perfect sense! Hah!

  11. Catherine says:

    My birthday is September the 12th, which I have dubbed the official “I [heart] NY” day. I celebrate by wearing my “I [heart] NY” T-shirt and enjoying my big huge crush on magnificent Manhattan in various and assorted ways.

  12. Anonymous says:

    Yeah, the first one to dare you to shut down your computer for 24 hours gets it in the face. I need my Blogography fix!

    Also, I totally understand about random stuff happening on your birthday. Patty Hearst was kidnapped on my birthday and I’ll never forgive her for stealing my thunder.

  13. Joefish says:

    I’d participate in this if only someone would promise to fill the void in my heart with beer, tacos and oral sex.

    Where’s Avi when you need him?

  14. Bogup says:

    Hey on March 24 let’s everyone log on to Blogography and have a cyber birthday party for our host. Could we bring our own graphics? I’ll wear a Big Island & Vancouver Hard Rock Cafe pins.

  15. Bre says:

    Ugh. I don’t understand why people are so freaked out that computers are part of our daily lives. Would they rather return to rock hammers?

  16. Hey, I’m just sayin’ . . . my birthday is 3/19 and crazy shit ALWAYS happens on my birthday. It’s actually a documented phenomenon called “the birthday curse”. Well, maybe not documented but both my sister and I know about it. ALWAYS. Crazy shit. Always.

  17. adena says:

    I don’t know…..right now an official “Kill Everyone Who Pisses You Off and Get Away With It Day” is looking pretty appealing.

  18. Avitable says:

    How about International Kick Someone in the Nuts Day? I’d vote for that one.

  19. Bogup says:

    I’d vote for a STFU Day!
    That would include all those with cell phones who talk, and talk, and talk. And would include politicians, especially Dick Cheney and John Edwards and John McCain. And would include Hollywood political types who need to STFU including Rosie O’Donnell.
    Yep, National or even International STFU Day! Has a nice ring to it, don’t ya think?

  20. Dominic says:

    Happy advance birthday wish from me. Good entry. Good blogging. Good humor. Good cartoons. Gosh what do you have that is no good? Take Care!

  21. margalit says:

    Happy Birthday, Dude. We’ll be having the first annual Boston-area Dave2 Birthday bash this evening in your honor. How does a chocolate-orange pound cake with orange cream-cheese frosting sound to you? And I believe that’s 41 candles plus one to grow on, right?

    Oh, and for your gift, I’ll be keeping my computer on, for some of us make our paltry living through the big electronic box.

    Oh, and July 24th is “Don’t eat for a day” Day… just because that’s about as stupid as turning off your computer for a day, too. What dildo invented that holiday, anyhow?

    PS Bake the freaking bread already. It takes less than 15 minutes on day 1, and about that on day 2.

  22. Melanie says:

    I would *totally* vote for an International STFU Day.

  23. Kapha says:

    Int’l Eat with Your Feet Day – oh man, when I become Earth’s Supreme Leader this is first on my list of todo’s.

    P.S. Was that “fathom” pun intentional? :)

    P.P.S. I kept waiting for you to say that people shot the fish out of some kind of gun onto the canvas and that became the art.

  24. yellojkt says:

    What a clever way of letting people know it’s only one month until your birthday. I better get shopping for your gift. Do you have an Amazon wishlist or anything?

    And I am going to stay on my computer 24 hours on NSSD just to piss off the ISD people.

  25. Karl says:

    How about a “No Breathing Day” while we’re at it? Give me a break. Freaking Luddites.

  26. Bogup says:

    Come on Karl, that’s ridiculous. Even Luddites need to breathe, and they don’t even use computers. ;-)

  27. Mocha says:

    But the next day we’d all be turning on our computers to find out how it went. It will be full of TMZ, YouTube, and Google searches on what we did. We’d have been recording out day without computers so we could GET ON OUR COMPUTERS THE NEXT DAY AND WRITE ABOUT IT.

    Someone is a genius. Someone who comes up with this shit. Seriously.

  28. james says:

    happy birthday! i second that vote for nssd!

  29. Eve says:

    Why just stop at computers? Why not make it National Turn Off All Utilties Day? Turn ’em all off, gas, water, electric, let’s see who can do it, cuz really, it serves a purpose, right?

  30. kapgar says:

    Ummm, while I would like to go a day without my computer, it’s kinda my job and, therefore, I sorta need it turned on.

  31. Catherine says:

    By the way, the off switch there on top? Totally looks like a straight on view of a penis (I was a bit surprised at the subject matter of the entry). I feel compulsively about completing the image when I see it. I may print out this page and find my red Sharpie…

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