Blogography Logo



Posted on Tuesday, February 6th, 2007

Dave!Oh that's just swell... my internet connection is freaking out again. I think it must have something to do with the cheap-ass router they gave me when I signed up for DSL, because even a power-down and reset doesn't fix things. I wonder how much that's going to cost to replace?

As I sit here like an internet junkie without his broadband smack, I contemplate putting away my MacBook and unpacking my suitcase full of dirty clothes before it starts to smell. But I've got a full bottle of Febreeze under the sink, so I decide to wait for the weekend. Hopefully nothing comes alive in there in the next four days.

Instead I think I'll draw monkeys with guns...

Monkeys with Guns

Monkeys with guns are funny.

Unless, of course, you happen to be anywhere in the vicinity when they are firing them off. Something tells me that monkeys would tend to be a bit irresponsible with guns.

Categories: DaveToons 2007Click To It: Permalink


  1. ms. sizzle says:

    monkeys seem to aim their poo pretty well so maybe we underestimate what kind of shot they would be?

    i’d rather be safe than sorry- i’d steer clear.

  2. adena says:

    You are SUCH a cheater! The post for the 6th wasn’t actually posted until the 7th!!!

    Oh well….I suppose I forgive you because your internet connection sucks.

    That and you drew monkeys w/ guns. I could use monkeys with guns this morning. I don’t care if they’re irresponsible with them.

  3. Dave2 says:

    Ms. Sizzle… Something tells me I’d rather be shot with a gun instead of being hit with monkey poo!

    Adena… The entries are dated when I write them. This one was written last night around 6:00, but I didn’t have internet to post it until I got to work this morning. This happens a lot when I travel and internet access is spotty. 🙁

  4. diane says:

    No internet access sucks!

    Monkeys are funny.

    P&G skins rabbits to test that Febreeze, you know…

  5. Hilly says:

    So Dave….my husbands favorite term is “like monkeys fucking a football” when he has to describe a cluster-fuck of idiots.

    Could you draw me monkeys fucking a football?


  6. Avitable says:

    It’s a little known fact that Annie Oakley was actually a monkey.

  7. Kyra says:

    I sense an Eddie Izzard fan. 😉

  8. Miss Britt says:

    I feel your pain! My internet connection at home has sucked so bad and it’s made all of my video whoring very choppy and sad looking. 🙁

    Do you think it would be unreasonable to get a T1 connection right into my house in order to blog to the best of my abilities?

  9. kapgar says:

    Well, “irresponsible” is entirely subjective.

    Monkeys with guns in a school… irresponsible.

    Monkey with guns in a shopping mall… irresponsible.

    Monkeys with guns during a full session with both houses of Congress present… GREAT IDEA!

  10. Jacquie says:

    I think drawing monkeys was a much better decision. Good going Dave.

    What medium do you use to do your drawrings? They are so cute;)

  11. Do I have to wait for your blog’s anniversary to get that toon on a shirt? It’s too awesome to wait!

  12. Laurence says:

    OOOH Bad Monkey… Bad !!! Guns are bad !!! 🙂

  13. Lela says:

    For some reason, those monkeys remind me of George W–is that weird?

  14. Dave2 says:

    Diane… Well that’s kind of silly! Animals aren’t smart enough to take very interesting tests.

    Hilly… Could I? Yes. BUT WOULD I DRAW MONKEYS FUCKING A FOOTBALL?!? Uhhh… I’m pretty sure animal protection services would frown upon something like that…

    Avitable… No.. no… that was Bernadette Peters who played Annie Oakley in the Broadway show. It’s confusing, I know.

    Kyra… Always. Because guns don’t kill people… people kill people. And so do monkeys… if they have a gun. 😀

    Miss Britt… Unreasonable? No. Excessive? A bit. Expensive? Yes!

    Kapgar… You mean in addition to the monkeys who are already there, right?

    Jacquie… Everything here is drawn with Adobe Illustrator. I document my creative process here.

    Frances… This year’s Blogiversary is going to be something special… so keep your eyes peeled. Monkeys with Guns might make an appearance… 🙂

    Laurence… Yes. Monkeys with Guns is about as bad as it gets.

    Lela… Not really… because monkeys with guns remind me of Dick Cheney for some reason. They’re probably equally dangerous with them, so maybe that’s it?

  15. stephanie says:

    I’m thinking Curious George might get into some pretty funky mischief with a gun, so I’m going with what you said, Dave… Monkey’s with guns… probably not a good idea.

    (I love Curious George, and just had to figure out a way to make that reference! 🙂

  16. Suzanne says:

    I’m impressed that you knew it was Bernadette Peters in Annie Get Your Gun…

    And monkeys with guns beat unpacking and doing laundry any day, hands down, no contest!

    What’s your next travel destination?

  17. delmer says:

    You can buy laundry detergent with Febreze already in it. It won’t help with your dirty suitcase, but it does mean you can let the clothes lay a around in a pile a while longer.

  18. Dave2 says:

    Stephanie… Everybody loves Curious George! He’s one of my favorite characters ever. 🙂

    Suzanne… When I was in New York once, I remember walking by a theater and seeing a giant poster for Annie Oakley with a giant BERNADETTE PETERS on it. Sometimes having a good memory is not such a good thing. 🙂 I don’t know where my next travels will lead to… I’m usually the last to know!

    Delmer… Good to know! I just may limit my washing to once a month now!

  19. Harold says:

    ..If I ever caught monkeys shooting guns, I would surely have to SPANK them….

  20. Andre says:

    …this always reminds me of you complaining that you get charged high rates for using internet in europe….at least our stuff works 😉 cannot remind myself a single day within the last years where my internet was down….i think that that is worth the 10 Bucks we pay more/month.
    However i still would like your monkey to fire guns at the guys from my ISP to bring the price down, most properbly tearing out their hearts will help more 😉

  21. Dave2 says:

    Harold… Spank your own monkey and leave mine alone! 🙂

    Andre… Uhhh… my internet is fine. It’s my cheap-ass router that’s dead. At least this time! 🙂

    I have no idea what you guys pay for monthly PERSONAL service… all I know is that your PUBLIC access is obscenely expensive and limited when compared to here. The near $40 I paid for 24 hours of restricted access is absurd. That’s more than I pay for an entire MONTH of personal service with no limits.

    The typical price I’ve found for public internet access here is around $7.95 for 24 hours… sometimes that price goes as high as $12.95… but NEVER have I seen a $40 charge.

    As for “working” – I think I might debate that. Of the four hotels I stayed at, only the last one had decent speed and reliability (as well it should for $40!). Other times “EuroSpot” gave me absolutely crap throughput that had me wishing for dial-up! 😀

  22. Chase says:

    Dammit. I already searched out the Eddie Izzard/monkey/gun/bannnnaaaaanna skit for you. And you already had it up.


  23. Dave2 says:

    I owe my love of all things Eddie Izzard to Karla. 🙂

  24. Webmiztris says:

    if they’re as irresponsible with guns as they are with their own feces, you would be correct, sir.

  25. sandra says:

    I’ve had good luck with mine — it’s a Belkin. And I’m a dork.

  26. yellojkt says:

    Monkeys With Guns would make a great name for a rock band.

  27. Mrs RW says:

    I think “Monkeys with Guns” would be a great movie title. Perhaps this could be a scene in your animated feature…

  28. jtm says:

    Ah, Dave… I’ve enjoyed traveling with you! You are such a great tour guide.~and quoting Eddie as well… you rule!
    If you ever find yourself in need of an Eddie fix I’ve got tons of stuff…just laying about the place… and many, many clips uploaded, just drop me a line.


  29. Jacquie says:

    Thanks for directing me. I think I have read it in the past but I forgot. I will check it out again!!

Add a Comment


I love comments! However, all comments are moderated, and won't appear until approved. Are you an abusive troll with nothing to contribute? Don't bother. Selling something? Don't bother. Spam linking? Don't bother.
PLEASE NOTE: My comment-spam protection requires JavaScript... if you have it turned off or are using a mobile device without JavaScript, commenting won't work. Sorry.



Your personal information is optional. Email addresses are never shown, and are only used by me if a public reply would be too personal or inappropriate here. The URL link to your web site or blog will be provided, so only fill this in if you want people to visit!



Blogography is a place to learn and grow by exposing yourself to the mind of David Simmer II, a brilliant commentator on world events and popular culture (or so he claims).
Dave FAQ:
Frequently Asked Questions
Dave Contact:
Blogography Webfeeds:
Atom Entries Feed
Comments Feed
translate me
flags of the world!
lost & found
Search Blogography:
thrice fiction
Thrice Fiction Magazine - March, 2011 - THE END
I'm co-founder of Thrice Fiction magazine. Come check us out!
hard rock moment
Visit DaveCafe for my Hard Rock Cafe travel journal!
travel picto-gram
Visit my travel map to see where I have been in this world!
Blogography Badge
Atom Syndicate Badge
Comments Syndicate Badge
Apple Safari Badge
Pirate's Booty Badge
Macintosh Badge
All content copyright ©2003-2022
by David Simmer II
Creative Commons License
This weblog is licensed under
a Creative Commons License.
ssl security