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Posted on Wednesday, September 20th, 2006

Dave!Some total f#@%ing douchebag threw five kittens out the window of a moving car in Kirkland. One died at the scene, two were rescued, and two others are missing (and probably hurt, scared, or both). I am of the opinion that anybody this f#@%ed up should be shot in the head because, let's face it, if you torture innocent animals for kicks then you have no business living. Those who have no respect for life... any life... doesn't deserve it for themselves. If there is any justice in this world, this total loss of a human being will be tracked down and tossed out the window of a moving car into the path of an oncoming truck.

Deep breath.

Anyway, before I go tearing off to Seattle, I thought I would post my entry for the day because I don't know if I will have internet access. And since I've gotten quite a few queries as to how I go about drawing my "DaveToons" I thought I might as well write about the creative process that goes into each drawing for anybody who's interested.

Once my entry has been completed, I determine if I need a toon to make my point, and decided how to best capture the imagery of the story I am trying to tell. I then rough out some sketches so that I can best make a selection. Usually this is a single toon, but sometimes more. For this example, I've selected the DaveToon which appeared here on August 3rd...

How to Draw DaveToons!

With my initial rough sketch drawn out, I then scour the internet looking for photographic references so that my illustrations will be as accurate as possible. Since the toon I'm working on in this example shows an idiot getting a pole shoved up his ass, I'll spend considerable time hunting for photographs of street signs and asses so I can have a starting point from which to start drawing. Research is a critical step, and can take several hours if not days...

How to Draw DaveToons!

At this point, I often consult with a special effects house like LucasFilm's Industrial Light and Magic or an animation studio like Pixar for some computer-aided design work. This allows me to examine the scene from all angles and select the best vantage point to depict the action. This step usually costs tens of thousands of dollars, but the expense is well-worth the price because of the valuable insight I get out of the process. How deep does the pole go into the ass? At what angle does Lil' Dave have the best leverage? All of these factors are easy to calculate with a good computer model to work from...

How to Draw DaveToons!

Using my notes, sketches, photo research, and computer renderings, I then begin the actual drawing process using Adobe Illustrator. Every detail is painstakingly recreated using simple shapes (squares, circles, etc.) that are combined, stretched, warped, and sculpted. I then use the pen tool to redraw those areas where simple shapes don't properly construct what I am trying to draw. As an example, the ovals I used to illustrate the ass did not look as good as the photo reference I researched, so I have to redraw each cheek by hand...

How to Draw DaveToons!

All that's left to do is pick colors for each part of the drawing and add any needed text. This is usually done as I go rather than waiting until the very end. That way I can be sure that colors which end up next to each other are distinct and work well together. Sometimes I'll use gradient shading to get a more 3-D look, but usually I don't have the time and have to resort to flat shading like I did this time...

Fuck passing lane drivers

And there you have it! The actual drawing part takes about 5 to 10 minutes per toon depending on how much material I was able to re-use from older drawings. But once you factor in the research, computer design consultation, and brainstorming, the average DaveToon takes about three weeks to complete.

And why do I take such time, care, and expense to be sure each DaveToon is the best it can be? Because my readers demand it, that's why... the bastards!

Errr... except YOU. I'd never say that about YOU, because I just love YOU!

Categories: DaveToons 2006Click To It: Permalink


  1. Mooselet says:

    Gee, that research in step 2 looks like the things I find on my husband’s computer. So you’re telling me he’s just doing “research” instead of “spanking his monkey”? Wow, I feel so much better now. Thanks Dave!

  2. Aargh says:

    Yes the bastards should be deprived of life. I get really pissed off when I hear about these things happening. I would kill anyone who even thought of hurting my dog.

    Errrrr ok ok I am better now….

    Love the lesson on your drawing Lil Dave and was wondering do you get a bulk discount from Pixar and ILM?

  3. Kapha says:

    ** ROFLMAO!! πŸ˜€ **

    (Here’s to hoping it doesn’t end up on a plate somewhere…)

  4. Gary says:

    HA! That’s great. And usefful too, but tell me, if you use flat shading, why do you bother makeing the chars. 3d in the first place?

  5. serap says:

    I worked in a prison for kids once and one of them was in for microwaving his mum’s kitten cos it wouldn’t stop meowing. He then cleaned up the mess cos he didn’t want to get in trouble. There were some horrible kids in that place, but he was the one that I just couldn’t bear to look at. It just makes me sick.

    The flipside is of course that the world also includes people like you Dave, who are willing to spends 10s of thousands of dollars and weeks on end, just to produce a davetoon for your loyal fans. And having to look at all those pictures of pert bottoms… you’re all give Dave, gawd bless ya.

  6. EDDIE says:

    It looks like two dudes. Blonde and dark hair. But you researched women’s asses???

  7. Kevin says:

    But when you do something such as the DaveCago 2006 image, don’t you also have to factor in travel, on-site research, and professional photography shoot time? That must mean numerous additional weeks of work.

    You must really love us! Thanks, Dave!

  8. karla says:

    I for one appreciate the effort that goes into your ass…um, er, cartoons.

    When I was at my parents last week, some f*ckwad threw some kittens out a window there, too. Unfortunately, those did not survive. It seems to happen often out there…they go onto some quiet country lane and just toss them out the window. Sick, absolutely sick. I despair for humanity….

  9. Jeff says:

    The fact that you will go to no “end” in the name of research for us Dave is quite inspiring. THANK YOU!!!

  10. Avitable says:

    I figured that you’d send it to Korea to be colored by the same team that does the Simpsons.

  11. Walt says:


    It shows! The research really pays off big time! Thanks for going the extra mile.

    As for the cat killer there’s not much to say. I believe we humans are no more than a virus or plague to the Earth. We are less in tune with nature than any other creature. We arrogantly refuse to see similarities in our personalities with that of other creatures and claim a divine thought process. Well the act of throwing a tiny animal out the window shows our gift in action. Now add the slaughter of men and women at war and you’ve got America – socially and institutionally educated as superior beings. It makes me proud when moroons can’t spend two seconds to come up with a better plan. I’m moving to Singapore where you’re killed for less!

  12. Kristin says:

    OMG, HOW do you so often express exactly how I feel?

    Off to Kirkland to try to adopt one of those kitties…

  13. This really made me smile. πŸ˜€

    well, except the first paragraph. I’ll never understand WTF is wrong with people. I’m totally pro-the eye for an eye punishment.

  14. jodi says:

    that’s it, i’m calling in sick and going on a kitten hunt! poor babies. πŸ™

  15. ChillyWilly says:

    Tough research…. Wish I could call that “research” LOL

  16. kilax says:

    Yuck, I wish I would have just skipped the first paragraph of your post today. My heart sank when I read what that asshole did. I could literally feel my heart skip a few beats.

    I am an architecture student and a bit of an animal rights activist. My thesis project is an animal shelter with an education center that teaches children and adults how to properly treat animals. Too many children are being allowed to abuse animals at a young age. This shelter design is hypothetical, but I think it is a good idea, and I hope to design a real one after I graduate.

    People who abuse animals are extremely likely to go on and abuse people too. I hope that asshole goes to jail, but I doubt that will happen.

  17. NetChick says:

    WTF. That guy/chick does need a bullet between the eyes. How horrible. It makes me so sad…

    But, thanks for cheering us up with the rendering! ;P

  18. Wayne Hall says:

    So why doesn’t the victim in the DaveToon have a thong? 83% of the subjects in your field study wore them so it should lend itself to protraying the majority in the victim.

    We all know Lil’ Dave is wearing on, so maybe you just rounded down to the nearest 50%?

  19. delmer says:

    I feel a lot better, now, about the $5,000 I spend monthly on the NY Times proofreading staff and the $3.50 I give my oldest son to do fact checking.

    Down in Hillbilly, Ohio I, unfortunately, know of a man who fed a litter of kittens to his pit bull. A person should really do all he can to overcome his inbreeding …

  20. jacquie says:

    it’s good that you do research. I know it’s a tough job, eh?

  21. Laurence says:

    Thanks Dave for drawing Lil Dave ! You always bright up my day with Lil Dave !

    I have 3 comments :

    1. How I’ve changed of bakery ?
    One day, I saw kittens at the door of my bakery. I bought my baguette and I said to my baker : “These kittens are so cute !”. He answered me with cold tone : “Look at them, I will drown them tonight”.
    Me… What ? You will not really do that !
    Him… I’ll really do that.
    Me… No, I don’t want to !
    Him… If you don’t want to, you have to adopt them.
    I took these kittens and I called all my friends in order to make them adopted.
    Since… I never set foot in his bakery !!!

    2. I am always surprised.
    You manage to put asses’ pictures on Blogography and you always succeed in using them as an argument and in justifying them…
    I think you have talent for that !!! πŸ˜€

    3. Ah Dave, we love you too !!!
    I love you because you succeed on sending word of absurd (or aberrant) things to me. In french, “tu rΓ©ussis Γ  me faire dire des choses absurdes (ou aberrantes)”.
    For example : I have just thank you for putting girl asses’ pictures on Blogography !!! You’re a genius, Dave… πŸ˜€

  22. Mark says:

    How convenient. That’s the kind of research I like to do.

  23. sultana says:

    That d***wad should be tossed out a fifth story (or higher) window. You just don’t do that kind of thing. πŸ™

  24. Bec says:

    Ass on A Stick – it’s a new snackfood for big stonkin’ alligators!

  25. Randy says:

    This is hilarious. Not the kitten part, that clearly speaks for itself…

    But the “mocumentary” treatment you give the toon process of a great Davetoon.

    Just way too funny…

  26. Belinda says:

    Oh, thank you for that “peek into the process!” I feel like a true insider now, like I’ve reached a state of enlightenment…could it be Davevana?

    Please hurry back. I need participants in my current TiVo/Refrigerator-themed I Dare You! challenge. ‘Tis only the beginning; they’ll get better.

  27. deezee says:

    I was really interested in your drawing process. And now I feel like I have to hit the gym…

    (Can I ask what program you draw in?)

  28. There is a special place in hell for people who harm animals.

    Research. MMhmm. Sure.

  29. Robin Brown says:

    I don’t understand how people can be so cruel. We had a similar incident in our area last week. This jerk has not been caught yet!

    Here is an excerpt from the story:
    β€”It was along these tracks that a Mishawaka women witnessed a young man throwing kittens at a train as it passed by. β€œThe trains come about, well every 10 minutes to every 20 minutes. We are used to it. We have lived here forever,” Mishawaka resident Angela Kitto said. But it is a site that still causes them to peek out the window from time to time just like Manuela Kitto was doing last Thursday. β€œI was just looking outside. I noticed that kid walking up to the railroad with a pretty big sized box in his hand. He was looking, and stopped right there.”

    Seeing this drew Manuela outside. “That’s when I saw him reach in a box and throw a kitten a the train. I just closed my eyes, ran in the house and got hysterical and told my husband. He reached in and grabbed a kitten and threw it at the train, a live kitten, and threw it at the train.” Her husband called the police.
    Meanwhile, she confronted the man. “I came back out and ran towards him, screaming what are you doing? Don’t you know there is the Humane Society, Pet Refuge? What are you doing? I seen him pick up the dead kittens and put them in the box and he ran.” When the train passed, one lifeless kitten was found.
    Mishawaka police and the St. Joseph County Humane society are now investigating who is responsible. Director of the St. Joseph County Humane Society Ellen Paul said, “We and they very much want this case to be solid, we don’t want to compromise it, because we do want to prosecutors office to carry it forward and prosecute the individual responsible.”

  30. RW says:

    Something isn’t quite jiving between the end result and the research. I can’t put a finger on it.

    Well maybe that’s the problem….

  31. Karl says:

    Wow, I had no idea how much planning and researching went into each toon. I have a whole new respect for you, sir!

  32. Erin says:

    Wow, now that second step? That’s love. Thanks! (And also, I wish I had a sliver of talent with Illustrator, because I’d love to be able to draw my own toon)

  33. Shoshana says:

    LOL. I forgot about time coz I stumbled into your blog right before I was going to go to bed!

  34. Epona says:

    No punishment is harsh enough for people who hurt animals. Endless, painful torture would be a start…

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