Tonight after work I followed a building contractor's truck which had "Let Us Help You Build Your Dream" stenciled on the back. The guy was going 25 miles per hour in a 35 mile per hour zone. Well MY dream is for people to drive the frickin' speed limit... can you help me with THAT?? Dumbass.
It was the cherry on the ass of my day.
And now, since that seems like it would be a fun thing to draw, I present a visual interpretation of the above sentiment...
Next up: apparently I pulled a boner today.
Do not expect a visual interpretation of that, however, as an explanation is in order...
Out of all 64 T-shirt shipments I sent on Monday, I somehow processed five of them as "label only" - meaning that they did not have postage on them. As I was attempting to exit the post office with an armload of rejected packages, an old man comes running up to hold the door...
Old Man: Hey partner, looks like Christmas came early for you! HA HA HAAAH!
Dave: Ah. No, I'm needing to ship these out.
Old Man: Then aren't you going the wrong way with those packages? HA HA HAAAH!
Dave: Oh. Yeah. I forgot to put postage on them, so I have to go fix that.
Old Man: Pulled a boner did ya? HA HA HAAAH!
Dave: Uhhh... what?!?
Old Man: Good luck partner! HA HA HAAAH!
Dave: Uhhh... what?!?
I walked away from that conversation very confused, but fortunately Wikipedia was able to clear things up:
"A small mistake having an amusing effect?" Well, I certainly hope that's what the old guy meant.
Because anything else would be very disturbing indeed.
And I don't want any more cherries on my ass.
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Is that the first time you’ve heard “pulled a boner” before? Crazy. I wonder if it is a regional term.
Well, I’ve heard a variation of it… but it had meant something entirely different!
Pull my finger…
Oh, that’s tame compared to some of the things I hear in “Mizz-ur-uh.”
When it rains, we’re likely to hear, “Looks like we’re havin’ us a gully washer.”
We’re likely to be told to “warsh” our hands in the “zink.”
When my neighbors make the same drive I make to St. Louis everyday, they say, “We’re a-goin’ to the city.”
Sad, but true.
Since when do you eat ass with a spoon?
I have had a cherry ass day too, and your drawing made me laugh. Thank you!!
Heh. Sounds painful.
Also glad I didn’t have to see a cartoon Dave Boner-pulling. Egads.
I like the fact you filed this post under the “Boners” category in Technorati.
Just be careful what you ask for if you click on it 😉
Yeah, what Chanankin said. Are you going to scoop that cherry out of the ass with a spoon? That’s like something from the Howard Stern show.
Awww. Old people like you!
old people say the darnedest things!
good thing i don’t like cherries or that drawing would deeply disturb me.
Well if that didn’t make me burst out laughing.
My favorite colloquialism was always “tighter than a toad’s ass – waterproof”, to indicate that something had been well planned and had no holes.
— I got my shirt today :>)
What the hell?! If you said that in Ireland you’d be laughed out of the building. 🙂
This is my first time here. As you know first time is always strange. So I’ll be me next time. Cool blog you have!
I received my Zombie shirt today. It is very cool. I still get quite a reaction from last year’s “Bad Monkey” shirt.
Got my shirt today – love it, Dave! Thank you!
In one of the cartoons I remember seeing when I was little one of the characters makes a reference to ‘pulling a boner.’ I think it’s a Looney Tunes. At least that era. It may have been in a Bugs Bunny.
In HS a buddy and I got to write some lines for a play. One I remember is: “Steve, I’m not saying I haven’t pulled a boner or two in my day” which made it by the school censor even though “how deep do you have to plant your eggs to get a good crop” was axed. (My buddy and I thought we were very funny and risque … mostly, we were juvenile — a trait I still possess.)
Speaking of t-shirts, it arrived in the mail yesterday. Casual friday will have a new shirt that gets worn.
That’s a mightly fine cherry you’ve got there… HA HA HA HA
With all the talk of cherries on asses, I’m sure you know exactly where my mind jumped… straight into the gutter! I’ve never heard that term before either – a bit random if you ask me!
You were very patient with the old guy. Here in Washington DC, people like that get sneered at on a good day!
I’m using that, for sure.
Must be close to dinner time… that ass is actually starting to look good.
I love my new T-shirt, thanks, Dave.
Bonner and cherry on the ass…
Because of Viagra, number of STD increased in retired community these days. Was that old man thinking about it, I wonder…
But I only picture cherry on the ass… with whipped cream.
Please, expalin.
BlogLaughs…gotta say HAHA! My dad is a Mizzuruh farm boy by birth. He uses phrases like “bright eyed and bushy tailed” and “Nervous as a whore in church” and “Throw the baby out with the wath water”.
And he says “warsh”.
Never ending colorful dad-isms. by way of the Ozarks.
So I’ve got the same question the old guy asked –
“aren’t you going the wrong way”?
Why didn’t you get the postage while you were at the post office?
Everybody payed for the shirts and postage using PayPal. I wanted to use my PayPal funds to pay for the postage, and they don’t let you do that at the post office, unfortunately.