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Posted on Wednesday, June 8th, 2005

Dave!While killing time waiting for an eye exam appointment after work, I went to JC Penny's because the socks I like are on sale there. While looking around, I ran across a man and a woman shopping in the menswear section. The guy was clearly not into it (what guy would be?) but the verbal exchange that followed shocked me pretty bad...

GUY: (holding up a shirt) Screw it. I'm just going to get this one.

GAL: (holding up a different shirt) Really? I think this one would look better on you.

GUY: Well nothing looks good on you, you ugly bitch, so why don't you just shut up! I'm getting this f#@%ing shirt.

GAL: Okay. Okay. Sorry.

I will never forget the look on that woman's face after having heard such a heinous remark. It was a look of utter defeat and sadness that will haunt me for a long, long time. One minute she was cheery and helpful, the next she was mentally beaten and distant. The sad thing is that this is probably not the first time she's heard that.

The even sadder thing is that she probably believes it.

I cannot fathom why people put up with such cruelty and abuse. If the bastard had said that to me, he'd end up with the clothes-hanger shoved up his ass, and I wouldn't care about the consequences. I mean, seriously, what keeps this woman from cutting his penis off in the middle of the night and flushing it down the toilet? How does somebody get to the point where they are so damaged that public degradation is deemed acceptable?

Movie Quotable of the Day: "A person needs new experiences. They jar something deep inside allowing him to grow. Without change, something sleeps inside us and seldom awakens... the sleeper must awaken."
Yesterday's Answer: Undercover Brother (2002) with Eddie Griffin and Dave Chappelle.

Categories: DaveLife 2005Click To It: Permalink


  1. Aravis says:

    A lot of times a woman like this will have grown up in an abusive home. This to her seems normal, and she truly doesn’t believe she deserves better.

    I was with someone like that once, only he would never have behaved that way in public. He smiled in public and waited to get me alone. He started out as the typical Prince Charming and only gradually turned into the frog. I think I was dazed by it at first, thought it an aberration. When it turned out it wasn’t, I left. And I never looked back! I’ll tell you this too, a clothes- hanger up the ass would be the least of the man’s worries who tried something like that with me now. *G*

  2. Anthony says:

    That’s really sad. I think women stay with guys like that purely because they’re too afraid to leave and somehow they believe that they are useless without an abusive, asshole boyfriend/husband.

  3. Michelle says:

    You should have just unleashed your frustration at the BMW engineer on the guy in the shop!

    It’s so easy for women reading that entry to think, “I’d never stand for that” (because that’s what I thought initially too), but it’s a lot easier said than done. Such a shame for her.

  4. theMike says:

    My wife was in a similar relationship before our marriage, and I witnessed some of it. It’s terrible, and like you said, heinous. Maybe that’s why I took her away from him, but I always told her she deserved better than that. Assholes like that need a good public flogging, but that would probably only lead to them getting even nastier at home.

  5. michelle says:

    somehow i survived growing up in a physically,verbally and emotionally abusive home with my self esteem intact.
    most people do not.
    that said. i probably wouldve pegged that guy in the head with the nearest heavy object.

  6. Art says:

    We need little anarchy moments. Maybe a person could buy them by the minute. You could whoop that boys ass and not be prosecuted. And being judged as a chivalrous anarchy moment, you would be reimbursed for the minutes you used.

  7. Dave2 says:

    Sadly enough, she has probably been conditioned to think that nobody else would want her, and stays with this idiot because she figures it’s better than having nothing at all. If this were my choice, I’d take “nothing” thank you very much.

    I suppose the only thing worse would be if she were a child. Impressionable kids will believe anything you tell them.

    I am totally into the idea of “Anarchy Minutes.” In fact, I think I should be the exclusive distributor of “Anarchy Minutes!”

  8. Goran says:

    I think this was a good entry about an important topic. it is very sad to witness couples caught up in bad energies like that. They are both victims really.

    but the wirehangeridea didnĀ“t seem so bad!

    I just found your journal and I really like it so far!

    best regards

  9. flatrabbit says:

    The real question is when did it become acceptable for people to be abusive like that and get away with it? It’s a sad reflection on society in general when people like that are allowed to intermingle with the rest of the planet. I mean kids hear this kind of crap coming from an adult and they grow up thinking that it’s perfectly ok to act like that. That’s what really worries me, it’s a whole vicious cycle.

    I’d like throw in my support to the “Anarchy Minutes” idea. Can I get my allotment now?

  10. KIrkkitsch says:

    Don’t be too sad. Women are notorious for lovin’ the “bad” boys, getting treated like shit, then coming back for more. It’s called codependence. Only they can break the cycle, but the majority MUST be in a relationship at all times…MUST splort out a child…MUST have someone by their side to feel validated. It’s hard-wired.

  11. Jeeze. That’s really depressing. And while I’d *like* to say that I’d never stand for that kind of thing when it comes to myself, I think that’s sheer fantesy. However I *have* on at least one occasion given someone a talking to for that kind of behavior when it involves others. Speaking for the weak makes me feel good.. because maybe some day when I need it, someone will speak for me.

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