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Utah Day 7: Stuck in Seattle

Posted on Saturday, May 21st, 2005

Dave!Thanks to heinous flight connections between Delta and Horizon Airlines, I am stuck in Seattle with a three-hour layover. The good news is that they've got Wayport WiFi on the "C Concourse" in addition to the crappy Cingular service (which I have never been able to access even once). This is good news, as it allows me to sync all the work I've been doing for the past week to the office so it can be awaiting me Sunday morning. Yay.

While I sit here watching the FTP transfer, I might as well clean house from the past week...

Mobile: Some bitch is screeching into her mobile phone across the lounge from me. I am concentrating really, really hard to make her head explode, all to no avail. She is a perfectly deplorable specimen of womanhood... sitting there with her legs all spread out like a dog in heat. I can only guess that it's to accommodate the huge set of balls it takes to be so astoundingly rude and uncaring as to the comfort of others. If there is a lawyer reading this... exactly how much trouble could I get into if I were to just get up, walk across the room, grab her phone, throw it on the floor and stomp on it, then bitch-slap her gum-smacking face so hard her teeth rattle?

Sith: The topic du-jour everywhere I go is Revenge of the Sith which is interesting. The general consensus seems to be "I liked it a lot, but..." (then fill in the blank). Even more interesting? Everybody has something different as to what is bothering them about it. Some petty, but others profound. Some problems I had never even thought of until it was mentioned. The most intriguing aspect is that these are not sci-fi geeks... just "regular" people. I guess that Star Wars is so ingrained in our culture that its something everybody has feelings for.

Q-Less: Next week's "FridayQ" will mark the meme's one-year anniversary. I have not yet decided as to whether I should carry on with it. I originally intended it as an easy way to fill up a Friday blog entry when the "Friday Five" died. But now the Friday Five is back, so I wonder if it's even necessary? I guess I've got a week to decide. Maybe somebody else would like to take it over? A warning: it's not as easy as it might sound. Oh well, suggestions are always welcome.

Shirt: If I had brought some "Bad Monkey" T-shirts with me this trip, I probably could have sold dozens of them. Quite a lot of people stopped to comment on it or ask where I got it (my favorite was the woman who said "hi there you bad monkey!" as she passed me in Goblin Valley, then started laughing hysterically). I passed out the URL thinking nothing would come of it, but new orders keep showing up every day. I am going to have to order more shirts when I get back, though I was hoping to wait until the new designs were voted on.

Pod: In looking around me, everybody seems to have an iPod with them. And yet, the Apple Death Watch doomsayers are still saying Apple will go under any minute now? What does Apple have to do in order to get these people to shut the f#@% up? Obviously a wildly successful line of products and overwhelming market share in the digital music player market is not enough.

Firearm: Oh terrific, yet another screeching bitch is on her mobile phone in the next row. I need a gun. And a beer. Many beers.

Booked: My files have all been uploaded, and now I am signing off so I can get back to reading a book I picked up in Salt Lake called Just One Look by Harlan Coben. Apparently, he is quite the famous author, but I have never heard of him before. I like the book quite a lot (so far) and will definitely be checking out his 11 others once I've finished it.

Movie Quotable of the Day: "I don't feel I have to wipe everybody out, Tom... just my enemies."
Yesterday's Answer: Star Wars Episode V: The Empire Strikes Back (1980) with Mark Hamill and Harrison Ford.

Categories: Travel 2005Click To It: Permalink


  1. Aww. I’d miss the FridayQ if it went under… I guess I’d hitch up with the FridayFive but it doesn’t look as neat… (Probably because it’s on LiveJournal and I’m an elitest snob:>)

    “my favorite was the woman who said “hi there you bad monkey!” as she passed me in Goblin Valley, then started laughing hysterically”

    Tss. That is genius. You’ve sparked a phenomenon. Speaking of phenomena, I didn’t quite believe you about the Happy Slapping thing until I saw this.

    The beers won’t make the lady shut up Dave. The gun will. :>)

  2. Anonymous says:

    Comparing FridayQ questions to the Friday Five recent questions…FridayQ wins. FridayQ questions are clever, diverse, and more interesting. But, I can imagine they are difficult to create each week. Maybe a temporary break to rejuvenate the clowning-burning attitude will help prevent a future complete FridayQ flameout.

  3. MRKisThatKid says:

    I’ve been subscribed to the friday five rss feed for a good while but i’ve only felt bothered enough to answer their q’s 3 or 4 times. The questions are usually pretty inane and no way near random enough for my taste, i dare say that your fq a lot more interesting.

    The only Apple doomsayer i can think of is Paul Thurrot, and yet even he has started to switch to saying that microsoft are the doomed breed, read his most recent longhorn preview, its hilarious. I like to think the biggest indicter of a companies success is how they perform outside of their native country, and if you take the UK as an example then Apple are on the up up up and up. Almost all my friends are either desperate for a mac, or have recently bought their first. And are raving about tiger so much that i feel sick every time they IM me, and because i can’t yet afford a powermac (i need one powerful enough to run logic and all the plugins).

    Oh and haha BTW, my mum loves your bad monkey tee. I’ll see how it goes around the lgbt community only you have no idea how backwards Sheffield is… ugh

  4. Patrick says:

    The choice I made to go with the “Bad monkey” t-shirt gets better and better every day. When the weather permits I’m going out on a “Bad monkey”-spree on town and we’ll see what happens 🙂

  5. Art says:

    “Bad Monkey” can be the code word for group beatings to commence on rude people in public places. So someone yells, “Bad Monkey” and then someone seconds the beating with another, “Bad Monkey”. Once you get a second then the person is deemed beatable and the beating begins.

  6. karla says:

    I got my bad monkey t shirt just the other day.
    Dave, you win for “the best packaged product that I needed a blow torch to open”. AndI thought my Mom was a crazed packing tape wielder? You win!

    Once I wrested it out of the packing….I love the t-shirt, and will wear it proudly here in Norway, where the Norwegians will either totally love it and get it (them being hard to suss out on sense of humor) or they totally won’t get it at all.
    I eagerly await the experiment ahead. And the warmer weather needed to wear the t shirt in the first place. Argg.

  7. TheMike says:

    Your were right, the bad monkey shirts really do work. It’s like their magic:

  8. Dave2 says:

    The packaging was a mistake. At first I was going to use these little “Priority Mail” boxes the post office had. But then I was told I needed to over-wrap them to send international. But then I was told I should have used an envelope. So I ended up with all three. I’ll know better for next time!

    Ah yes… theMike is looking mighty fine in his stylin’ Bad Monkey shirt! Hmmm… seems like a good way to keep theWife interested in YOU instead of a rendezvous with the pool boy. Sure he’s a horny 18-year old that walks around half-naked and tanned, looking like a Greek god… but is HE wearing a Bad Monkey T? I think not! Yes sir, nothing spices up a relationship like a T-shirt from Blogography! Well, that and good porn. But a shirt is probably the more socially acceptable route.

    Except in Cleveland. Yes, I’m pretty sure even the nastiest porn is good to go in Cleveland. 🙂

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