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Healthy

Posted on April 5th, 2014

Dave!This week I decided that I wanted to start eating healthier. Less fat. Less sugar. Definitely less salt. Not radical changes... just a step or two in a better direction.

So today I when I went to the grocery store, I looked for foods that would put me on track.

One of the more promising options was a vegetarian bean, rice, and cheese burrito that I hadn't seen before. Nowhere on the wrapper did it say "healthy" (something which guarantees shitty taste)... it just said "70% Organic Ingredients" and the Nutrition Facts looked halfway decent. Dinner is served!

Needless to say, it was crap.

Bland. Boring. Tasteless.

Turns out that once you start taking the fat, sugar, and salt out of everything... "everything" loses what makes it oh so delicious to eat. Which is a statement that will insure everybody you know will want to give you That One Recipe which is the exception to the rule. But believing that is only setting yourself up for disappointment.

So I guess my new plan is to eat the same crap I've always been eating. I'll just eat less of it.

And squeeze in an apple or two.

Maybe some baby carrots and an occasional salad.

Because if I have to eat nothing but bland, boring, tasteless shit in order to be healthy, I'd just as soon skip it.

Now to make up for my crap dinner, I'm going to have two OREO Cookies. Which is ten less than I would usually eat, so congratulations to me for healthier eating!

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