The fascinating thing about hanging out with Jenny and her TequilaCon Planning Posse is how much it has altered my life... even though I was only exposed to them for a short period of time. Somehow I've returned home with a completely new vocabulary that made perfect sense in Santa Fe, but which nobody here can understand. I'll start talking to somebody, and they'll just wander off scratching their head all confused.
Just in case it starts seeping into my blog entries, I thought I'd take a minute to define some of the most common new vocabulary which has been permanently embedded in my brain...
POPSICLE or POPSICLE NASTY.
Meaning: Very, very wrong or messed up. Unethical, perverted, or naughty.
Usage: "Wow, good thing I asked to see ID before I rented that hooker... she was only fourteen years old! - That would have been so popsicle!"
Origin: Jenny's infatuation with Family Guy quotes. In one episode, Herbert the pedophile pervert tries to tempt Chris Griffin to his basement by promising him free popsicles.
SHARK EXTREME or SHARKY.
Meaning: Way beyond normal parameters. Eclipsing the extreme with it's extremeness. Badass.
Usage: "I'm not just rollerblading down Mt. Kilimanjaro... I'm rollerblading down Mt. Kilimanjaro shark extreme because I'm doing it naked! Yeah, I'm sharky that way."
Origin: Playing "Apples to Apples" and having to choose whether Hitler or Sharks better define "extreme." Jenny has the full story here.
OHH NAHOOOOOO! ("oh no") or AHY KNAHOOOOOO! ("I know")
Meaning: Disbelief followed by emphatic agreement.
Usage: "OHH NAHOOOOOO! TequilaCon 10 is going to be in Wasilla, Alaska!" — "AHY KNAHOOOOOO!"
Origin: That would be Jenny's addiction to Family Guy again... this time it's quoted from Bruce.
ZOMBIE DOG.
Meaning: Something terrifyingly evil. Beyond scary.
Usage: "Holy crap! Dick Cheney just shot somebody in the face and then laughed while he took away their health care! Now that's Zombie Dog cold!"
Origin: Driving back from Taos, Jenny made the mistake of slowing down when she saw some dogs near the road. This sign of weakness was all they needed to attack, but not before psyching us out by staring at us with their cold, dead eyes.
VIPER.
Meaning: Unbelievably cool. Mind-blowingly awesome.
Usage: "Dave's blog is so viper! I can't believe he doesn't charge us to read it."
Origin: Jenny's conversation with her seat-mate on the flight to Albuquerque. She's got the whole story here.
USED COWBOY.
Meaning: Stinky. Smelling bad.
Usage: "I was going to have the broccoli casserole, but it was all used cowboy so I got the cheese sandwich instead."
Origin: Do you know what happens when you pack four pairs of used cowboy boots into Jenny's sealed van in 90-degree heat? You get a very smelly van that reeks of used cowboy.
And now I think I'll try to get some sleep because I am shark extreme tired.
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I’m not sure if it’s good or bad that I totally got the popsicles thing… only it’s only appropriate with those whistling s’s……
…and to think I thought that saying “wicked awesome” was good slang. On my next client call, I am going to tell my clients that their profits and savings were VIPER for the 1st quarter. I like viper. 🙂
I’ve used so much soap but I just can’t get this used cowboy smell off of me.
those are worth learning.
Those are great! The stories behind some of them are totally “viper” and stuff.
Hello. I’m from the Government. I’m here to help.
Due to the Fairness Doctrine, you must alter your blog post somewhat. Fortunately, you’re given some choices here.
You can either change the Wasilla, Alaska reference to be Chicago, Illinois (not very funny) or the Dick Cheney/healthcare example to instead reference Barack Obama and gun control. We feel that to be the choice that delivers the most comedic value.
“Holy crap! Barack Obama just shot somebody in the face and then laughed while he took away their guns! Now that’s Zombie Dog cold”
I’m sure you can appreciate the irony.
As sentencing for your initial infraction, you are to first be made aware that whall’s daughter’s new high school’s mascot is the Viper. You are hereby commissioned to make a new great logo for them. Failure to comply will be met with having Dick Cheney sent after you with a pack of Zombie Dogs.
So will you be making buttons for all these?
Oh man, I almost forgot about used cowboy! That was some kind of nasty.
And I’m so glad you drew zombie dogs – it’s time people knew about their existence!
I heard her say used cowboy twice at TC09.
“My last Black Dragon had gone used cowboy, so I ordered another one.”
“I can’t place that smell…. used cowboy or a blogger that hasn’t showered in 4 days?”