The last day of the year is great time to be a blogger. It's a time when you get to re-visit all your entries for the past 364 365* days and see just how pointless and futile your life really is.
As usual much of this year was spent traveling, and I managed to rack up 127,320 air miles on eleven airlines. This seems about average for me now, but pales in comparison to seven years ago when I would easily get up to 200,000 miles and beyond. I haven't yet decided whether this is a good thing or a bad thing, but it's nice to spend time at home every once in a while.
And now some choice bits of random Blogography crap from the year that was 2008...
JANUARY
• Made it to the Hard Rock Hotel & Casino in Biolxi at last, after my previous attempt was thwarted by Hurricane Katrina.
• Was finally able to admit it's all about me.
• I said my final words on LOLCats...
• Returned to Cologne, Germany so I could be attacked by bears and get insulted by Disapproving Poster Man...
• Visited Warsaw, Poland, which was amazing in ways that I just can't articulate...
• Saw the gayest building in all of Europe...
FEBRUARY
• Found out that Poland really doesn't like President Bush very much...
• But Poland totally loves me, which is all that really matters...
• Went back to Cologne so I could partake in the Kölner Karneval where I was given the hottest scarf ever, got to see transgender Viking warriors, and gape with awe at the giant flaming wheel of meat.
• Relived the horror of dating the "Do You Know Girl."
MARCH
• Attended the TequilaCon 2008 Planning Meeting in Portland, Oregon.
• Changed Blogography's header graphic and hung out with Mr. Bun before he was shipped off to Iraq...
• Traveled to Oslo, Norway on my birthday so I could FINALLY meet Ms. Texpatriate herself, Karla!...
• Spent the day in Bygdøy in Norway to see some of the most amazing shit on earth.
• Took the train to Göteborg, Sweden to meet my very good blogging friend Göran and take in the sights.
• Went back to Oslo so I could get the crap scared out of me and visit PERVY STATUE PARK!
APRIL
• Developed my own line of luxury condoms.
• Experienced the excruciating pain of kidney stones while in Salt Lake City, and finally got to meet Marty (albeit in a drugged-out state of pain-killer euphoria).
• Posted one of my most controversial DaveToons ever.
• Came up with a business plan for Davebucks Cocoa...
• Had my 5-Year Blogiversary celebration where I gave out my biggest prize ever...
MAY
• Goofed around in New York City with Vahid.
• Went to Philadelphia for THE blogger event of the year... TEQUILACON 08!
• Went to Philly Pride 2008 with Dustin and Vahid!
• Went to see Eddie Izzard perform in Chicago with Jenny.
• Explored the world of Webkinz.
JUNE
• Told my 20% coming out story.
• Developed the best software idea ever.
• Exposed the truth about gay marriage.
• Had an awesome time at Daveattle!
• Endured a dilemma with malt liquor...
JULY
• Shared a naked photo of myself.
• Talked about how moneybloggers ruin everything.
• Avoided being poisoned to death at Johnny Rockets....
AUGUST
• Found out I have mutant healing powers like Wolverine!
• Attended the wonderment of DAVECAGO!
• Delivered the winning prize for my Blogiverary 5 celebration by attending the very first Dave Louis event where I had the best orgasm of my life at Ted Drewes...
• Back to Salt Lake City so I could meet Marty again... this time without being drugged out of my mind.
• Theorized how my new diet might cause my ass to explode.
• Had big fun during an unexpected trip to Portland.
SEPTEMBER
• Went to Hawaii for vacation...
• Railed against the hypocrisy of John McCain.
• Reminisced about Blogography on the occasion of Google's 10th Birthday.
OCTOBER
• The inevitable finally happened when I met Wayne (and other cool bloggers!) at the first ever Davestin Event while saying hello to Karla (again) in Austin.
• Provided historical evidence of my chocolate pudding addiction...
• Back to Chicago for the TequilaCon 2009 Planning Meeting, where I finally got to experience Puppet Bike!
• Exposed myself in my most personal entry ever.
• Revealed my second-worst date of all time.
• Had an amazing time at DaveFrancisco.
NOVEMBER
• Off to Orlando for Avitable's Annual Halloween Party dressed as MURDER CLOWN!!
• Shared the joy of my Hannah Montana Musical Pen..
• Gave one of many reasons that Bill O'Reilly is a total fucking dumbass (as if anybody really needed me to tell them that).
• Explained Wisconsin to non-Wisconsonians.
DECEMBER
• Took a break at Walt Disney World.
• Visted the PostSecret exhibit in Arkansas.
• Got stuck in Seattle for a week thanks to Snowmageddon 2008.
• Lamented being trapped in a box.
And that was 2008. Everybody have a safe and happy New Year as we head into 2009, and thanks for reading!
UPDATE: *OMG! It was totally a leap year this year!
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The goth mother’s day vid is my fave I think. Happy New Year to you sir!
If your life this past year has been pointless and futile, than I have been dead. Your life has been like that of a rock star compared to mine. At least your box has stickers inside- mine was taped closed and pitch black. One of the few highlights this year was finding your blog. Thanks for the laughs, rants and profound insights (you are infallible, after all).
Maybe you could franchise Davelife? You charge an enormous fee, give strict guidelines on how to be Dave and let your franchisees deal with all the shit while you sit back and relax. I’d pony up the bucks for that!
Happy New Year and may 2009 be better than 2008.
It almost has to be.
Happy New Year, Dave!
Dave, you’re awesome. When are you starting the Davemonument Fund so I can donate? Happy New Year!
Another kickass year of Blogography! Happy New Year!
Happy New Year, Dave!! Finally meeting you in person was one of my highlights! You, sir, are incredibly awesome!
Shash
Great post.
Happy Hogmanay (look that up in your Scottish dictionary)
Wishing you happiness, health and prosperity in the New Year.
Great year end wrap-up. Mine wasn’t nearly as exciting, but then whose could be? You did have a great year. Thanks for letting me live vicariously through you.
See… now I must hide my head in shame as you mentioned Dave Lake City and Dave Lake City 2 in your year-end post. Promising to remember to put Dave Lake City 3 into my 2009 year end post.
You had a great year this year.
Pauvarino.
You are cursed with the cuteness!
Happy New Year Dave! Thanks for the memories, what a year!
Happy New Year Dave!
Glad to have met you and got to know you through your great blog!!!
Keep it real in 09!!!
My favorite Dave moment of the year was definitely Dave Diego! That was a fun night and I love hanging out with you as much as I can (as evident by this last year!).
Happy New Year Davey-Joe!
I read your post about Henry, and I’m touched beyond comprehension right now. The world needs more compassionate hearts like yours. Bless you for reaching beyond your comfort zone for a stranger. That is what love is all about.
Happy New Year, Dave!
Thanks for the recap Dave… one of these years I should do one for my own blog(s), although it won’t be as interesting as yours, methinks! 😀
Have a happy 2009: here’s hoping it’s a challenging yet fulfilling year for us all!
*lynne*
Happy New Year Dave! I’m so glad I had the opportunity to meet you last May at TequilaCon.
I hope that 2009 is a great year for you and that you keep on blogging. Although I don’t comment often I read your blog daily.
It’s amazing how many of those posts I remember. The time sure does fly. Happy New Year, Dave!
Happy New Year, Dave2! Hope you get to come to NYC to hang with me and Dawg and eat some cereal!
I’ve enjoyed your blog for a while now and just wanting to delurk to say how much I enjoy reading it. I look forward to future entries. Oh, by the way, you’re a very handsome man. I know that you’re now gay, but if you were, I would try to be on you like white on rice! 🙂 Happy New Year.
Calvin
Happy New Year!!!!!
You’ve had a full and interesting 2008- hope 2009 goes as well! (And that you keep posting your awesomeness.)
🙂
That is a crazy amount of travel, Dave. I’d wish you better luck in airports this year, but your suffering is always so entertaining for the rest of us. Do you think you’re a magnet for those idiots or is it just the amount of time you spend traveling?
Happy New Year
Great recap! I look foward to DaveLanta 3!!
Happy New Year, dude.
I found your ‘most controversial DaveToon’ an absolute laugh riot (of course, I’m always the first to laugh when people fall down too). Anyway…I LOVE your blog and I know it’s been a trying year for you healthwise….hope 2009 brings peace for you in all areas!!!
Happy New Year!