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Hunger

Posted on Thursday, September 6th, 2007

Dave!Except for the fact that I'm coughing my head off at random intervals for no apparent reason, and still feel tired all the time, I'm finally kinda back to normal.

Except for these bizarre food cravings I keep having. Out of nowhere I'll suddenly be dying for some random food... like saltwater taffy... or beef jerky... or a fifth of Jack Daniels. Or, more likely, a fifth of Jack Daniels with saltwater taffy and beef jerky. It doesn't make any sense. I mean, saltwater taffy sticks to your teeth, I don't eat meat, and my alcohol of choice is J├Ągermeister. So why?

The answer is simple.

I didn't survive my sickness. It killed me. I died.

AND NOW I AM BACK FROM THE DEAD AND CRAVING HUMAN FLESH!

Well, not really human flesh, but I sure could go for a donut. A Dunkin' Donut with pink frosting...

Zombie Hunger

A pity that there's no Dunkin' Donuts anywhere in Washington State.

I guess I'll just have to settle for that fifth of Jack Daniels.

And now, because I was recovering yesterday and didn't feel like writing...

  • Yes, I know Apple had an iPod event yesterday.
  • Yes, I know the iPhone price was slashed by $200.
  • No, I'm not mad... I thought my iPhone was worth $599 when I bought it, or else I wouldn't have bought it.
  • On top of that, when I think of how often I use it and how essential iPhone is to my life now that I have it, $200 is a small price to pay for the time I've been using it.
  • The amount of money I've saved on not having to buy overpriced internet access at airports alone is already at least $100.
  • Not to mention the fact that my iPhone plan with AT&T saves me $20 a month over what I had been paying, and my iPhone will have paid for itself by the time my two-year contract is up.
  • People who whine about the pitfalls of being early adopters should either not be early adopters or shut the frak up.
  • I'm actually thrilled that the price drop will bring more people to the sheer joy that is iPhone. The sooner Apple dominates the universe, the better.
  • I still love Apple. I still love my iPhone. I still love my Macs. I still worship Steve Jobs.

And, before I forget, since I've been emailed about it a dozen times...

  • Yes, I know that Steve Jobs announced today that Apple will give a $100 Apple Store credit to iPhone early-adopters after he got hundreds of whiny emails.

The only question now is... what will I spend my $100 in Apple-money on?

  • A third iPod Shuffle ($79). I've already got one Shuffle for music, and a second Shuffle for audiobooks... maybe I need a third PURPLE iPod Shuffle to clip my pants closed after I eat too many Dunkin' Donuts with pink frosting. BONUS: $21 left over!
  • A new iPod nano "fatty" ($149). It's just so adorable! So tiny! And it plays video! And my old iPod nano is permanently attached to my car stereo, so I am nano-less.
  • AppleTV ($299). Now that I'm buying video and subscribing to television shows to feed my iPhone so I have stuff to watch when I travel, it would be cool to stream that stuff to my TV. And who could resist a night in front of the television surfing YouTube?
  • A 24-inch 2.8GHz iMac ($2,299) Just because it's pretty and I don't have one.
  • A Two Dual-Core 3GHz MacPro with dual 30-inch displays and all the extras ($16,716). YES! TOTALLY AWESOME!! THIS IS ABSOLUTELY WHAT I WANT!! And once I use my $100 credit, I only have to pay $16,616!! Sweet!

Hey. Wait a second...

DAMN YOU STEVE JOBS AND YOUR BRILLIANT $100 APPLE STORE CREDIT PLAN TO ROB ME OF SIXTEEN-THOUSAND-SIX-HUNDRED-AND-SIXTEEN DOLLARS OF MY HARD-EARNED MONEY!!

=sob!=

If it's even possible, I think I love Steve Jobs even more than I did yesterday... that evil genius bastard.


Categories: Apple Stuff 2007, DaveLife 2007Click To It: Permalink
   

Comments

  1. borysSNORC says:

    Dave,
    You’re sounding a bit manic there… did the cravings also extended to some dietary cousin to the ominous red cordial?? :)
    RMB
    PS – I’m not sure how you did it, but I am convinced you gave me your plague, as no one else I know is sick and I simply MUST have caught it from someone. :|

  2. hearts says:

    i think i’m in love with you, because you’re in love with steve jobs. will you marry me? in an apple store? please?

  3. Carl says:

    Jesus Jobs sent you back when you died, to eat donuts, and make sure Apple takes over the world. iWorld.

  4. iddly says:

    Or you could purchase a red iPod shuffle, load it with Queen and early David Bowie songs and give it to me….

  5. jane says:

    Okay good, you clarified you were sick. For a moment there, I thought you were pregnant. *whew*

  6. Baak says:

    I think you might be pregnant.

    OMG – I might have channeled Avitable there for a sec!

  7. AnnieB says:

    Maybe you’re pregnant! That would certainly explain all the bizarre food cravings!

  8. Kyra says:

    Hmmm so in essence you are stalking Jobs like you used to do with Hurley? Little bit scary there…. ;)

    I think all the people who are upset about the price-cut are actually just causing even more media coverage for Apple’s goods, and will end up boosting things overall. Let them whine, it’s good for Apple (or he wouldn’t have offered the $100.)

  9. If you buy the $16,000+ system, just keep the card for something else. It doesn’t even scratch that surface.

    Now the AppleTV on the other hand, that’s %33.33333 off! That’s a new toy you should consider!

  10. kapgar says:

    Don’t forget shipping and handling and the AppleCare coverage plan!

  11. Nat says:

    iMacs, and iPods and iPhones… oh my!

    Wonder if they’d package all that stuff with pink sprinkles for you? And maybe they’d throw in an extra iMac that you could send to a total stranger in Canada who has only commented on your blog twice? eh? (She wants an iPhone but they aren’t available here yet.)

  12. Avitable says:

    Mmmmmm…..dual 30-inch displays.

    Displaylicious.

  13. Tanya says:

    It’s refreshing to see someone with a sensible view of the iPhone price slash. It drives me up the wall when a product’s price is reduced and people get all whiny and “It soooo unfair!” about it, as if nothing ever comes down in price. My husband still tortures himself looking at the current price of the tv we bought last year.

  14. SJ says:

    How The Church of Dave began:

    Steve Jobs = Eve
    Apple = apple
    You = Adam

  15. kilax says:

    This display of apple whore-dom is a sign you are getting better!

  16. ChillyWilly says:

    Exact thing I thought about when Steve did the generous thing… knowing damn well he’d get more than the $100 back from iPhone/Apple lovers.

  17. Hilly says:

    You are cracking me up with that first list up there….seriously, things come out at an exorbitant price then get reduced ALL OF THE TIME. So yeah, even though I never bought the iPhone, I would not be spazzing if I had then the cost came down later.

    Um, and you know how I feel about pink frosted donuts….are you trying to lure me to the dark side of dieting today? ;)

  18. Iron Fist says:

    I think you must be a zombie now. The only other explanation for all those weird cravings is that you’re pregnant. And what are the odds of that?

  19. sizzle says:

    should i fed ex some top pot donuts, stat?

  20. I’m liking the “Dave is Pregnant” theory.
    Spawn of Dave would be something to see.
    PS: I’m thinking red nano w/my credit.

  21. sue says:

    Just so you are clear about your feelings.

  22. Lewis says:

    “Worship”? Wow. That’s a serious deal, especially when you’re at Mr. Jobs’ feet. Maybe you can abscond with a pink donut for while you’re down there and hungry. Annie’s Donuts is just a couple of blocks from us. It’s not such a bad idea.

  23. Kristin says:

    Dude, there is a Dunkin Donuts on 45th in Wallingford.

    At least there was one there when I was pregnant and insane.

  24. Brandi says:

    Sounds like you are craving salt dear.

  25. The Chad says:

    I still cant bring myself to go back to AT&T, even with the uber cheap iPhone. Looks like I’m still gonna go with the Helio Ocean.

  26. I really wanted an iPod touch. Then I realized it was flash memory based. And my heart sank. 8GB or 16GB? Bugger. I’ll be sticking with my 80GB iPod “classic” for a while methinks ;-)

  27. bogup says:

    Because of all the kind words about Steve Jobs, I’m wearing a long sleeved black t-shirt tomorrow and jeans. I’m also holding my breath that my old Dell will hold out until the the OS Leopard is released and then to buy the 15.4″ MacBook Pro.
    Please Steve, let it be.

  28. Wayne says:

    If a memo surfaces later that this was his plan all along (release it high price, later drop the price, then give back some of the high price in an attempt to look like you’re responsive, then get a huge blogebrity to say how cool the whole thing was, would he still be a genius?

    May. be.

  29. Alexis says:

    Get the new iMac!!! I just got mine, and it’s in-fricking-credible!! I’m just sad that I have to go on vacation tomorrow and leave my new baby behind for an entire week…

  30. blanetalk says:

    I wasn’t going to comment on the whole iPhone price drop/Jobs apology/refund in Apple Credit. But I think it is interesting that you can now get the same Safari net browsing ability by Wi-Fi, plus the ability to download music wirelessly from the iTunes store in the newly announced iPod for the same price, without having to pay for AT&T’s lower quality phone service. But I understand you are happy with what you have. Mind-numbingly, unreasonably happy.

    Name another product you could purchase and see a 33% price drop within 10 weeks that you would accept with such a sanguine attitude.

    “Yes, the “cult” … er, I mean “brainwashing” … er, I mean “force” is strong in this one.”

    By the way, I’ve been doing all the things you’ve been doing from my touch screen PDA phones for over 4 years. In face, I made my first solely phone based ebay bid and purchase in 2001. Purchase from Amazon, same year. Driving directions … same year. For a lot less money than you’re paying.

    And I have frequently been a no-complaint early adopter myself. I understand the concept of paying more, sometimes hundreds more, to have something when it first launches. But only ten weeks later? I mean, come on!

    But hey, it’s Apple, god love ’em! And I am being sincere when I say, “More power to them.” I’d be proud to be a stockholder!

  31. Dave2 says:

    Here’s the deal… I have not found AT&T’s service to be lower quality than Verizon. Not in rural Georgia, not in Atlanta, not in Chicago, not in rural Wisconsin, not in Seattle, not in rural Washington, not in Minneapolis, not in Detroit, not in Nashville, not in Milwaukee. Everybody keeps saying how bad AT&T is, but I’m making phone calls everywhere and just don’t see it. Yes, Verizon was fantastic, but AT&T has not proven to be noticeably worse.

    Name another product? How about DVDs? How about televisions? How about clothing? How about ANYTHING. Stuff goes on sale all the time for ridiculous prices. And people just need to get over it. 10 weeks, 10 months, 10 days… if you don’t think it’s worth the price, THEN DON’T BUY IT! I felt the iPhone was worth the $599 when I bought it, and have no regrets. As I’ve said many, many times now… not only is iPhone saving me money every single month in my mobile bill, the fact that I’m not having to constantly pay for internet at airports and paying for Alaska Air DigiPlayers is saving me additional money every trip I take. I’ve probably already saved $200 since owning iPhone, so this is such a non-issue for me.

    What everybody is failing to understand is that the cost of the iPhone is not limited to its parts and manufacturing costs… what about the costs associated with developing the product? Advertising the product? Promoting the product?

    When iPhone was released, Apple had high hopes, but no real way of knowing as to whether or not it would actually sell (look at the Motorola ROKR). They probably priced it high so that they would cover their costs in the event that it wasn’t a success. Now that it actually IS a success, they are assured to make a profit, and can lower the price accordingly, thus capturing even more of the market and get even more customers.

    This was not some evil plan to screw early-adopters out of money. It’s a business trying to stay profitable in a very competitive market where they have little experience. How can anybody fault Apple for that? Would it be better if Apple were totally stupid and released an unknown product at a margin where they could lose the entirety of their investment? Now THAT would REALLY be stupid.

    And if you’re happy with your touch-interface 4-year old phone, then more power to you. But why is it so inconceivable to understand that iPhone users could possibly be happy with THEIR mobile phone of choice? You can tell me over and over again how I shouldn’t be happy with my purchase and it’s not going to change my opinion about my iPhone. It is the best mobile media player I’ve ever used. It is the best mobile phone I’ve ever used. It is the best smart-phone I’ve ever used. Overall, the iPhone is the single best tech gadget I’ve ever purchased at any cost. I should know, I’m using it every single day. Yet because Apple dropped the price $200 I’m suddenly suppose to hate it? I don’t get it.

    And, most perplexing of all… because I’m saving money every month with AT&T, have no problem with their service or quality, and love the experience of living with iPhone, I’m supposed to be brainwashed? Whatever.

  32. blanetalk says:

    I never said hate. I did say unreasonable.

    However, I will admit, if Apple had waited 6 months before the price drop, I probably wouldn’t have said anything. But it’s only ten weeks! If they have determined that sales justify a price cut this soon after launch, somebody did some serious miscalculations up front. I don’t care what kind of product we’re talking about.

    If I buy the “making sure they didn’t take a loss” rationale, then I would suggest the fair thing to do is offer a $200 credit since they are now assured of making their profit. A $200 refund check would be fairer, but the Apple faithful would love to have more Apple purchasing power, so credit works.

    But I gotta tell you, I was never worried that Apple wouldn’t sell tons of the thing and make their money back many-fold. When is that ever a concern with any Apple product launch? It’s a very smart company, and Steve Jobs is a very smart man.

    I’m glad you’re happy with the device, and I’m clear that you feel it was a good deal. I just don’t find that to be reasonable. That’s just my opinion.

    And BTW, my current touch screen PDA phone is less than a year old. I like my tech toys too, but I do stay current.

  33. Hilly says:

    I’m waiting to see how much you love that AT&T service in Southern California. I’m not being snotty or picking a fight (rowr!) but I am really honestly curious. My service works wonderfully everywhere I go, except for here in SoCal.

  34. Dave2 says:

    Unreasonable? Heavens… you’d think that Apple held a gun to people’s heads and forced them to buy an iPhone! :-D

    As for the service, I’m beginning to wonder as to whether the phone has something to do with it? I dunno… maybe Apple is using more powerful antennas or whatever. I guess we’ll find out in a couple weeks!

  35. Hilly says:

    I’ll so be drooling over your phone if you get better service than I do…bring a hankie ;)

  36. blanetalk says:

    Good point … while the network overall gets knocks for quality of service, it wouldn’t surprise me to learn that Apple had engineered the antenna to provided better reception.

  37. Nini says:

    I’m not positive, but I have heard that there is deer blood in Jager. I’m a strict vegetarian as well, so I stopped drinking it. Do you know if there is any truth to that?

  38. Cheeseycom says:

    It appears SJ beat me to the whole Adam & Eve and Apple comparison.. but I just thought I’d share this with you anyway cuz this post reminded me of it.

  39. boerkrag says:

    I agree with your stance that those who got their ipods upfront and now want to whine should have waited… come on… any self respecting apple fanatic KNEW they would drop the price in a very short time after release.. but come on man if you own a iphone you have sold your rights to complain over such things…cuase lets face it you own an iphone….

    the closest i come at the moment is when i visit my apple temple in the mall and get to play around with the demo model a bit…

    By the by dave i stumbled onto your blog while doing some research and love it… thanks for some good reads…

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