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Bullet Sunday 37

Posted on Sunday, July 1st, 2007

Dave!It's B•U•L•L•E•T S•U•N•D•A•Y once again! Excuse me while I pull out my 44 Magnum...

• Spiceable... Is it just me, or is the Spice Girls one of the greatest musical groups of all time?

• Photoshopable... As I was working my way through filling orders from the Artificial Duck Co. store yesterday, I got a desperate phone call from a fellow designer. He was calling every Photoshop professional he knew, asking if they would help work on some photos he "inherited" for a project that was due on Monday. The previous designer (who was fired) had the photos taken without using a food stylist, and the results were really terrible. I felt bad for the guy, so I volunteered to work on a few images for him. I can tell you right now, you'll never have so much fun as Photoshopping sweat off of a brick of cheese on a Saturday afternoon.

• McDonaldable... Right now I would pay serious cash for a McVeggie Deluxe burger. But seeing as how it's only available at the New York Times Square McDonalds, I guess I'm out of luck. Why, why, WHY doesn't McDonalds roll this shit out nation-wide?

NYC McVeggie Deluxe!
I'll trade you my iPhone for a McVeggie Deluxe!

• New Yorkable... Of course, thinking about food in New York only makes me want to have a REAL bagel. I need to work a trip to NYC in my travel plans just so I can eat for a few days.

• Potterable... In many ways, I'm grateful for the iPhone not just because it's yet another super-sweet Apple product, but because it has distracted the world from talking about the final "Harry Potter" book which is being released next week. Since I'm not impressed with Harry Potter (and love Apple), this works out pretty well for me...

Dave Potter

I read the first couple of Harry Potter books and found them to be pretty lame and unimaginative. It seems that any actual creativity is sacrificed for some kind of deus ex machina crap to tell the story ("and Gryffindor gets 170 points pulled out of their ass at the last minute for stupid crap so they can win the House Cup!"). Anybody who thinks Harry Potter is The Shit should seriously check out the The Books of Magic graphic novels by Neil Gaiman (which started long before Harry Potter ever saw print).

• iPhoneable... Yes. I still want a friggin' iPhone pretty bad.

I'm just over 60 orders in on the Artificial Duck Co. orders. More stuff will be coming in on Monday, and I'm hoping to have all the orders shipped by the end of the week! Thanks again to everybody for your patience... just 262 orders left to go!

Categories: Bullet Sunday 2007Click To It: Permalink


  1. Sheila says:

    Are you trying to be like Avitable? 😉

  2. Dave2 says:

    Isn’t everybody?


  3. Avitable says:

    The rhyming with Avitable.

  4. Dave2 says:

    HA! I never even thought of that!

    OMG… you’re in my head now…

  5. Erik B. says:

    One of the greatest? I dunno, but they were fun for a minute. My jury is still out on whether it’ all embarrassing to them now.

    I’m not a vegetarian but fancy a veggie burger often. Why the hell DON’T they bring out the veg in a big way? There are SO many vegetarians!

    Here, here on the iPhone business. I’ve been drowning my sorrows away in a bottle of gin I feel so empty without one.

  6. RW says:

    Is it just me, or is the Spice Girls one of the greatest musical groups of all time?

    It’s just you.

  7. claire says:

    I read the 3rd and 4th HP books when I thought the 4th movie must’ve chopped out too much for story clarity only to discover the movies do a far better job of storytelling. The writing was so dull and obvious that I was really surprised by all the hoopla they get.

  8. Baak says:

    The audio books (tape/CD) read by Jim Dale are extremely well done and have taken us through many very long road trips. Book #5 was 27 CD’s!! Which reminds me…

    Her writing does tend to go on and on and on at times, and there are countless plot anomalies and situations that make no sense, but I must admit she did manage to conjure up a “world” that is awfully popular despite all its flaws. The movies have had problems (#3 was awful imo) mainly due to the fact that the books grew bigger and bigger.

    The game of Quidditch is one of my pet peves, however. As a game, it makes no sense to have the “capturing of the Snitch” result in 15 goals (150 points where a regular goal is 10) and the immediate ending of the game. It should have been 50 points and the game ends in X minutes, otherwise there’s no real point in scoring goals. A team generally wins by one player (the Seeker) grabbing something out of the air? WTF? It’s bascially set up for Harry to go one-on-one with someone and/or save the day, but is very lame. Other annoying things: one referee – duh, etc., etc.

  9. Hilly says:

    Damn I love me some RW. He’s not afraid to say what I’m thinking :).

    However I am glad to find another soul who is just not that into Harry Potter. High five and shit…

  10. Sheila says:

    Sorry, I should of explained better.

  11. bogup says:

    the McD photo is fairly good, but should there be that drop of drool on the table? oh, and that lettuce is a big mess.
    trying to be constructive here…

  12. bogup says:

    Is that a Davitable?

  13. Mrs RW says:

    “Anybody who thinks Harry Potter is The Shit”: well, that would be me!

    The books weren’t written for ADULTS for cry-sake (even though I’ve read all of them thrice)! And, yes, this is the same person who thinks “Noble House” is one of the greatest books of all time. What Rowling was able to do was get people to suspend reality (it worked for me anyway) and create characters that inspired a reaction. I, along with all the other millions, will be at Barnes & Noble at midnight the day of the release. Thank goodness it’s a weekend or I’d have to take some vacation time to read it all the way through. Note to RW: I will be unavailable that whole weekend…don’t even THINK of asking me to do anything else.

  14. Bre says:

    You know, it’s true. And I really really do want to zig-a-zig-ah

  15. Lewis says:

    McVeggie? You’re kidding. I had no idea! I really am in love with their salads, though. Now, have you tried the Burger King veggie deal — not so bad at all. I am in lust right now for my own, on the grill, with a cheese/onion roll, fresh avocado, garden tomatos, grilled onions, olive tampanade. Yum. Wanna stop by?

  16. Jacki says:

    Spice girls? Must be just you.
    If they do something exciting like make posh wear a bag over her head in all preformances – I may be interested.

    Harry Potter – I haven’t read the books because I know it will ruin the movies for me, but if they have got a whole generation of kids to actually READ something other than the latest playstation (etc.) magazine – it can’t be all bad.

  17. ssp says:

    I wonder how many days it will be before you post without mentioning an iPhone

  18. Bec says:

    I’m gonna go against the grain and admit to owning all the HP books and liking them. Yes, I know, am now social pariah. I cannot wait until 21st July (when the book comes out). All work/living etc will stop until the book is read…

    Yes, there are bits which don’t make sense and you can pick at books until the end of time but as I’ve said before and I’ll say again – any writer that makes reading cool for kids gets my vote.

  19. Jill says:

    Yes, Burger King has a veggie burger – at all their locations 🙂 Not the best veggies burger I’ve had, but when you’re out and about or in a hurry and need to grab something to eat, they definitely hit the spot!

    Harry Potter rocks 😀 But even better than Harry Potter is the HP fanfiction. Some of the stuff out there is way better than the original books… I guess not having an editor makes a difference or something… It’s fun to read the characters and storylines fleshed out more or go in totally different directions. Granted there’s some really bad stuff out there too, but once those are weeded out, the world of Harry Potter will always be fresh – even after the last book, there will be *tons* more to read 🙂

  20. Wayne says:

    I second that the BK Veggie burger is actually pretty good. I despise vegetarian meals, but I went veggie for a week to prove to a friend I could do it, and the BK Veggie definitely hit the spot for me a few times that week.

    Food stylist?

  21. Elizabeth says:

    Thank you thank you THANK YOU for your comment about Harry Potter! I thought I was the the only one in millions who just doesn’t think they’re that great. (Now I’m one of two in millions) Read the first one and was NOT impressed. There’s much better kid’s literature out there and it irks me to no end when people say things like “finally, a book kids can read!” Ummm, what did I grow up reading and lugging home boxes full of from the library every week? Oh, sorry, they didn’t make movies out of most of my books, they must not be any good. Right, enough of that rant. Again, THANK YOU!

  22. Mooselet says:

    I’m coming out of the closet to admit that I, too, like the HP books. It’s mind candy, not the cure for all that ails us. JK Rowling is no JRR Tolkein but I don’t think she’s ever professed to be. I will be buying book 7 straight away and pilfering it off the kids so I can finish it first.

    And I’m pretty certain a Spice Girls reunion is a sign of the Apocalypse…

  23. Michael says:

    I’m with those that say you need to read the other books (especially after the third), since they get much darker, and are generally better (aside from angsty Harry in book five, but you can’t win them all). You must remember the first couple were written early in her career. But, I’m with Baak on the one referee situation. When they only have one, it’s easy to miss things (and it’s happened a couple of times).

  24. I love the Potter books. And Neil Gaiman. Didn’t know they were mutually exclusive, dude. 😉

    As for the movies, the 3rd one is my favorite (Baak – thanks so much) but that could be because the 3rd book is my favorite. I even have a poster of the 3rd book’s American cover on the wall of my office and you wouldn’t BELIEVE how much crap I’ve gotten over that, mostly of the “Demon worshiper! You’re going to Hell” variety. Absolutely unbelievable in this day and age, particularly from folks who haven’t even bothered to read the books.

    Which is neither here nor there for your post, I suppose, other than…isn’t it nice that we have the option to all read what we want without having to agree with each other?

    As for the Spice Girls: RW is right; it’s just you.

  25. They’ve even adapted the Books Of Magic to paperback form. Although it’s missing that awesome artwork.

    (I feel the same way about the Harry Potter books).

    The So You Want To Be A Wizard series (by Diane Duane of Star Trek, Spiderman and other fantasy books) is pretty great too! She’s working on book 8 right now.

  26. -ksgrrl says:

    HP? Bah.

    Give Pullman’s _Dark Materials Trilogy_ a read.

  27. kilax says:

    I have been wondering the same thing about the McDonald’s vegetarian sandwich for years! Come on! People would order it in the big cities!

  28. serap says:

    I agree with you on the HP books… I read the first 2 and got sick of her writing style. I always watch the films at the cinema though – I think they’re hilarious!

    I disagree on the spice girls though… I don’t think they’re one of the greatest musical groups of all time. Only 2 of them can actually sing!

  29. victor says:

    About Spice Girls, it’s just you who thinks they’re one of the greatest musical groups of all time. But they have boobs so I don’t hate them. 😛

    The beard shadow of Dave Potter is a joke?

  30. Steve says:

    Is it possible, Dave, that fate has had it all figured out regarding your unrequited iPhone envy? Ask yourself: how many of those 60+ Artificial Duck orders would have been processed at this point if you had had that nifty little gadget to play with instead?

    I’ve been hearing the phrase Mac whore a lot these days. So far, my attempts to come up with a fresh alternative have been unsatisfying. Somehow “Strumpet for Steve Jobs’ Stuff” and “iSlut” don’t seem destined to catch on.

  31. Kyle Rivenbark says:

    harry potter wasn’t that great but the parodies that it spawned like the Barry Trotter book series and the potter puppet pals flash series are hilarious.

  32. Jeff says:

    Tell your friend a good trick is to put deodorant on the cheese before he photographs it. Can you show us the before/after pictures?

  33. thebigwilley says:

    Oh no you didn’t just dog on HP! You are such a muggle, I’m sorry. Some people just don’t get it, like I don’t get how that “Git R Done” guy is still getting work or how they spend 300 million on Evan Almighty or why we continue to pursure land wars in Asia?

    I cannot wait for the last book, pre-ordered in January, and the next movie, I’ve taken the day from work to insure seeing it twice. There’s no accounting for taste, but there’s something there, I mean she is a billionaire now.

    I also cannot wait for my bad monkey shirt to arrive….yay! I still think smoking monkeys shirt would have rocked as well… lata, TBW

  34. Randy says:

    If you get to NYC, you gotta have a lunch at Panini & Co. Right down near Wall St. (Beekman & William St.) Way cool menu and great value. Soup, Sandwich, chips, lemonade all included for $7.50 lunch. Great action!

  35. bogup says:

    iApplewhore works well for me…

  36. Hey dude! Did you see the story about the guys who destroyed an iPhone with a hammer?

    “Time limit” my butt.

  37. Eve says:

    Please explain to me why every rude person within a 20 mile radius of you is magnetically drawn to you? I mean, I live in what’s considered a “rude” part of the country, yet I don’t experience 1/10 of the rudeness that you do. That was a great comeback though, I think I’m going to store that one for future use.

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