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Posted on Wednesday, May 23rd, 2007

Dave!As I mentioned a while back, I tune-in to The View from time to time. Much like a car wreck (or Jay Leno) it's one of those things that you just can't help watching even though the entertainment value is questionable. What keeps me coming back is the outlandish political commentary that permeates the show's "Hot Topics" every day. Representing The Left, you have Rosie O'Donnell and Joy Behar. Representing The Right, you have Elizabeth Hasselbeck. And representing People Who Can't Form a Coherent Sentence, you have Barbara Walters.

Not surprisingly The View leans quite a bit to The Left because The Right is so woefully under-represented. This is kind of a bummer for a show that is supposed to feature different viewpoints, but Elizabeth's never-ending regurgitation of Conservative propaganda has me looking for George Bush's hand shoved up her ass, because I'm convinced she's got to be some kind of puppet. Rosie may be crazy and Joy may reduce everything to a punch-line, but at least they can form an original thought.

I don't know what the heck Barbara is for. Fortunately, she's gone half the time.

Anyway, there was a nasty fight between Rosie and Elizabeth today that was pretty messed up. It's not that I give a crap about any of the pre-programmed rhetoric Elizabeth says, but Rosie is just plain dangerous. Much like dumb-fuck Bill O'Reilly on the opposite side of the political nut-job spectrum, her unyielding black and white view of the world is part of the horrible wedge that is dividing and destroying this country...

Political Sanity
I put Jesus in the middle because he's supposed to love everybody.

Without any measure of compromise or an attempt to understand one another, people like this are doing far more harm than good, and nothing is ever going to get better for us. There's nothing wrong with having strong opinions or being Left or Right, but to go to such an extreme that there is no room for anything else in your thinking is sad. For a public figure to incite others to do the same is reckless and irresponsible. I respect people with strong convictions who are brave enough to speak their beliefs, but a closed mind should have a closed mouth.

Naturally this goes double for the politicians who are betraying their duty to serve all the people they have pledged to represent.

Which is why, when it comes to politics, I shun the dumbfuckery and choose to listen to a speaker of order amongst the chaos. A beacon of hope in a world of darkness. A voice of reason in a time of insanity.

I am talking, of course, about SpongeBob Squarepants...

SpongeBob Hero

Words to live by: Good people don't rip other people's arms off. — SpongeBob Squarepants.

Categories: Television 2007Click To It: Permalink


  1. serap says:

    I agree with you wholeheartedly… spongebob is today’s voice of reason. We have spongebob squarepants monopoly at home and I learn a valuable life lesson every time we play it.

  2. Kelly says:

    VOTE SPONGEBOB FOR PRESIDENT!!! Well said though… those who are extreme hurt a cause more than they help it…

  3. Stacey says:

    SpongeBob? Really? I always thought Patrick was the sage of the two.

  4. Liana says:

    Ok, my favorite line is unquestionably, “a closed mind should have a closed mouth”. Almost poetic in it’s simplicity.

  5. Kyra says:

    The View gives me hives.

  6. Avitable says:

    Spongebob is going to be my running mate in my bid for office.

  7. Beth says:

    why can’t we all just get along?? I love jerks with the mentality that we should all be assimilated into one Borg existence!
    Dave for President!

  8. Jeff says:

    Only you could figure out how to make a great point by tying Rosie O’Donnell, Jesus, Bill O’Reilly and SpongeBob Squarepants together in a single commentary. Well done!

  9. shari says:

    “Closed mind should have a closed mouth.” Preach it, my bruthah.

  10. Bre says:

    Ew. I’m sorry to say that Spongebob annoys the living hell out of me. I think it’s the voice. So what was the fight on the view about?

  11. Amen, brotha! Watching that pathetic feud made me ashamed to be a member of the same phylum as those crazies.

  12. WanderingStar says:

    Apparently the only good thing about television is SpongeBob. (Or, Veronica Mars! Ok, ok) I guess I should tune in. Politicians actually give me hives. I’m personally extremely liberal, but Rosie (bless her lesbian self) hurts her cause more than anything. I’d like to smack her upside her skull with a SpongeBob spongy bat.

  13. tori says:

    I missed the fight on the View because I don’t watch that show very often. It is all over the news but no one is saying anything about what they are fighting about, just focusing on their yelling that I can not understand. Both of them seem so set in their ways that I am glad that neither of them is in charge of anything of importance.

  14. suze says:

    “a closed mind should have a closed mouth” is probably my new favourite piece of advice. Sadly, it seems its the ones with the closed minds that open their mouths the most…

  15. whit says:

    I didn’t even know Rosie or Bill were still around, or Jesus for that matter. I have seen SpongeBob lately. I’d vote for him.

  16. Karl says:

    Speak it from the mountaintop, brother!

  17. Laurence says:

    I never saw The View. I don’t know Bill O’Reilly but I know SpongeBob (“Bob l’éponge” in french) !!! Apparently, it is a good thing. 😀

  18. Hilly says:

    1. That “closed mind should have a closed mouth” thing should be a slogan or tag line somewhere!

    2. Because of this post, I tuned in this morning and am watching The View as I type. Rosie is not on, no drama ensued and there are FOUR WOMEN TALKING AT THE SAME TIME. I need to run screaming from my tv now, thanks ;).

  19. Kyle I says:

    I love SpongeBob. I used to know the SpongeBob song by heart! It was mostly to annoy someone that I used to work with, but it was fun.

  20. RW says:

    Slam dunk, Dave.

  21. Suzy says:

    As a friend of both Rosie’s and Joy’s, I can say without equivocation that what you see on TV is not necessarily representative of an entire thought process. Having been on some of these panel shows myself, I can assure you that all the smart things you could have said and all the facts occur to you on the limo ride home.

    Does it make for good tv? Yes.
    Is anyone else on tv talking at this level about this war and this president to a mostly female demographic at 10:00 am? No.

    Had either of them let Joy speak, she was the one who had the goods on Bush and the war. Ro and Elizabeth, like 99% of the population, just want to be right.

    Me? I’m just waiting for Life on the D List to start in June.

  22. Jacki says:

    It seems that the only one’s that talk sense anymore are cartoon characters. I believe that spongebob may be too young and immature for president. Dora the explorer maybe? She is willing to include other cultures, she would have a supportive running mate (boots), and she is an excellent problem solver.

  23. Bec says:

    I love how Rosie looks freaked.

    “Oh God, there’s a person making sense over there – get them away, get them away”

  24. Dave2 says:

    I sure hope you are referring to Jesus… or even SpongeBob… because Bill O’Reilly couldn’t make sense if the stupid asshole had Einstein writing it down for him! 🙂

  25. P says:

    Yeah, one vote for spongebob! I caught a little of that fight between Rosie and Elizabeth cause it’s on comcast news. Just so stupid. I used to like Rosie when she had her show but she is just so over the top. And, what’s up with attacking each other. disgusting.
    Good post.

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  27. mimi says:

    As usual, I couldn’t agree more, Dave. My parting words: Goofy Goofy Goober Goober YEAH!…Spongebob for govenor! amen.

  28. HolyGirl427 says:

    I don’t rip arms off so much as I pull them out of the socket, and then, it’s only just a little. We’re still cool, right?

  29. Lela says:

    I wish you’d put “a closed mind should have a closed mouth” on a T-shirt with a cute picture of Lil Dave and sell it to me. I’d need a case of ’em to hand out on the street!!

  30. You have taken a complicated and divisive topic and summarized it nicely. I think you hit the nail on the head. I was directed to your site by Suzy Soro. I’m glad I checked it out.

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