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Posted on Sunday, May 29th, 2005

Dave!Why is it I have absolutely no motivation to do anything on a Sunday? It's 10:00am and I have not yet gotten out of bed. But now that I've spent the last two hours catching up on blog reading, I suppose I should consider it. I need to get a bed with a built-in toilet, refrigerator, and microwave so I can spend Sunday as it was intended (and here comes the hate mail from the church-goers!).

Neil has put up a few bizarre Google searches he's received. I was going to do the same, but find that the searches people enter once they're actually here are even more bizarre than what people Google (mostly "Lindsay Lohan Boobies" and the like).

Here are twenty of the more interesting Blogography searches as of late...

  • Most Powerful Good Mutants On Earth (which is odd, because I consider myself to be the most powerful EVIL mutant on Earth!)
  • show poop (I get a lot of "poop" searches because of this stupid entry)
  • www.showpeoplespoop.com (What the-?? And I got this search from more than one person too!)
  • diagram of poop (I have no idea...)
  • britneyspearsnude (BecauseIwritewithallthewordstogetherlikethis?)
  • granny sex pics (uh... disturbing)
  • why is martha stewart in jail ? (Because she's a bitch and must be made an example of to women everywhere... luckily men don't get sent to jail for being a bastard, or else I'd be in a "pound you up the ass Federal Penitentiary" right now)
  • ellen degeneres favorite shoes (wonder no more... it's a pair of Air Jordan Retro XII's)
  • keanu reeves gay (I wish! Keanu is sooooooo hot!!!)
  • is dave gay? (Only for Keanu Reeves, though these guys also have a shot)
  • dave sexy pics (Hey, ALL my pics are sexy! I just can't help it!)
  • dave naked (Why would somebody want to see this? As an FYI, there is a photo of my bare ass on the internet... somewhere... I'm not saying where. I can only guess she thought my ass was perfect, and needed to be shared with the world - anonymously, thankfully)
  • sexy photo (Ah, you must be looking for Elizabeth Hurley)
  • You are guests in my corn (a quote from my favorite movie of all time)
  • mature adult photos (because looking for adult photos on the internet is such a mature activity)
  • mix chicks fliks in the park (Picks six tricks for kicks!)
  • paula radcliffe peeing (I know she's the Brit marathon gal, but I didn't know that her urine has mystical healing properties)
  • vampire women (Aren't they all? Well, at least the ones I've dated)
  • stockholm women (I wish)
  • how Rhodeisland got his name (Rhodeisland got it's name when our founding fathers forgot to press the space-bar while naming the States of this great nation)

That's only the tip of the iceberg, of course. People come here and search for the strangest stuff.

Movie Quotable of the Day: "If we get caught, we're not going to white-collar resort prison... no, no, no... we're going to federal pound me in the ass prison!"
Day-Before-Yesterday's Answer: Natural Born Killers (1994) with Woody Harrelson and Juliette Lewis.

Categories: Memes 2006Click To It: Permalink
   

Comments

  1. Neil T. says:

    In the recent London Marathon, Paula Radcliffe stopped to pee half-way through. In the middle of the street. In front of everyone, and the TV cameras.

    I’m guessing the search relates to that 🙂 .

  2. Dave2 says:

    Lovely.

    And if I had photos of that, I’d post them on my blog fer sure! 🙂

  3. Ben says:

    “dave sexy pics”
    OMG! ASL!?!?!!!1111111 LETSZ CYBERZ@!!!

    😉

  4. Rob says:

    Movie Quotable: Office Space

    This happens to be one of my all time favorite movies. I swear, my office has equipment just like that damn printer Michael Bolton had problems with. I will have sweet sweet revenge on that fax machine!

  5. ssp says:

    ‘Rhodeisland got it’s name…’ a bit too much typo irony for me, I guess.

  6. Dave2 says:

    But the funny bit here is that they typed “how Rhodeisland got HIS name.” Which now leads me to wonder if somebody really is named that!

  7. Art says:

    Sorry about the Granny thing…..I was thinking about the Beverly Hillbilly’s and …..well……ya know.

  8. Lucianna says:

    great!!! congratulations for yours posts!!!!! your blog is fantastic…creativity is your principal feature!!!

  9. Anonymous says:

    I was looking for a different Dave’s ass.. nice web site though =) Good asses are hard to find!

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