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Posted on Wednesday, April 29th, 2009

Dave!The internet is a parade of non-stop entertainment. Especially if you have the twisted sense of humor that I do when you're surfing it. Because once it has been filtered through my demented mind, even the most mundane blog post can become a cavalcade of excitement. And yet, more and more I've found that no filter is needed. So many people on the internet are wacky-insane now that they hardly need my help to be entertaining.

Which is not a bad thing, because I'm sure people consider me to be wacky-insane too.

And they're absolutely right, of course.

I try very hard not to lose sight of this as I traipse through the blogosphere, but it is becoming more and more difficult. As an example, I'll come across a blogger who says that they're being attacked by a bunch of other nasty bloggers and I'll immediately become sympathetic. I'll dig a little bit, see that the blogger actually is being attacked, and become angry. Then I'll probably write a nice comment or fire off an email of support to them, because I've had my share of senseless attacks and hatemail and know what it's like.

And then... inevitably... other truths will come to light. Perhaps I'll find out that not only did the blogger have these attacks coming, but they are far worse at dishing out the venom than anything they're receiving, and there's a reason they're being attacked. Or maybe the blogger invited the attacks to get noticed. Or maybe the attacks weren't even really about them, they're just jumping into somebody else's war because they like the sympathy they get when they play the victim. Whatever the case, 9 times out of 10 I'll end up getting burned because the blogger in question is lying, delusional, paranoid, lonely, ignored, or just plain crazy.

But not crazy in a good way.

The horrible part is that I never seem to learn my lesson. I guess deep-down I want to believe that people are being honest about why they're being attacked... even though I know the odds are against it. Heaven only knows I've seen enough psychotic dumbasses online to realize I should be more careful, and yet I always seem to forget these people just when I need to remember them most.

Oh well... having your trust taken advantage of is all part of the blogging game, I guess. Obviously I can live with that, because I'm still here.

It's watching other people get duped that's getting to be too much to bear.

I keep wondering how much more I can take before I'm the one going all psychotic dumbass in my blog.

Though I'm probably there already and just don't realize it. Isn't this entry proof of that?

Categories: Blogging 2009Click To It: Permalink


  1. Jen says:

    This is why I hate everyone and trust no one. It’s easier that way.

  2. brandon says:

    not to be smarmy, but the fact that you refuse to become so cynical as to not take people at their word says good things about you. you’re a stand up guy, and i really respect that about you.

  3. Howard says:

    Yes, the Internet has given those with the loudest voices an amplifier. Unfortunately, it seems that kind of drama does draw in readership. Add a little wackjobedness and you have scores of people. Just look at Paula & Simon. …or don’t. If you have an nice, unoffensive blog, you also have limited readers, I’ve just realized…

    I’m going to go to the corner, start muttering to myself and draw weird shapes on the wall…

  4. Finn says:

    Help! Help! I’m being repressed!

  5. Ren says:

    I can’t believe you’re attacking me like this!!

  6. Hilly says:

    Of course the first thing I want to ask is to whom you are referring this time but I’ll refrain.


    I’ve found that people who are “attacked” very rarely did absolutely nothing to provoke it. Sure, there are random people who send even the best of us hate mail or attack us in comments but that’s just life in general. When something gets so big that there is a huge blog war going on filled with mud slinging and hurt feelings, generally both sides played some part in the whole damned thing, big or small.

    My newest crusade is against bloggers who lie to get our sympathy, especially in the form of gifts or cash donations. Like you, I am pretty hip to the bullshit jive but there are others less cynical, who like to believe everything. It makes me sick, quite frankly.

  7. Avitable says:

    I just prefer to attack everyone at all times.

  8. claire says:

    This is actually a good reminder that it can be good to have a quiet corner of the blogosphere.

  9. Sue says:

    Having been caught up on the blog wars before, I tend to be immediately suspicious of anybody complaining about attacks. That, and after blogging for about four years now I have learned to let attacks on myself dissolve into nothingness. Aren’t comment filters great?

  10. Missy says:

    Here in lies the advantage of writing a small, relatively-unknown blog…nobody feels compelled to attack me. Besides, I never write anything but Pollyanna-cheerfulness; oh wait, that’s my evil twin.

  11. Walt says:


    I’m convinced everyone blogging is some sort of twisted, snake oil salesperson. You just happen to be peddling dave-toons and I’m a Dave-toon whore! Draw something funny with the word “blah, blah, blah,” in it and I’ll support any crazy idea you have!

    If you don’t, expect some hate mail tomorrow. Oh, and I won’t sign it either cause I know how that really drives some blogger folks over the edge, cause you’re all trying to “keep it real.”

    And isn’t that it? After dealing with so many jerks there’s no way of anyone keeping anything real. Everyone gets lumped into the turd pit with the rest of the jackals!

    We all need a fresh start!


  12. So, you won’t help us?

  13. Faiqa says:

    I’ve noticed that people who believe they are being victimized for no reason generally lack the self awareness that would cause them to reflect on their part in the drama. They genuinely believe that the attacks are unprovoked. In this way, your inclination to believe them isn’t that far off from the mark. THEY think they’re telling the truth. Why wouldn’t you believe them?

    Did that make ANY sense??!

  14. Sybil Law says:

    I kinda know what you’re talking about – I steer clear of most drama, period.
    You’re a good guy, Dave. Really. 🙂

  15. Whitenoise says:

    hmmm… three years of blogging and I’ve never been attacked. Guess I run one of the boring blogs. 😉

    BTW, I see an interesting parallel with my professional association: Some pilot gets whacked by management, word hits the street, the boys rally ’round the flag- only to find out that there’s always more to the story. I learned this the hard way when I once testified in a wrongful dismissal case. I got the guy his job back at moderate personal cost (I lost a promotion and suffered reduced pay). In the end- it turned out that the guy was an a-hole and the company had a point.

  16. Maybe that’s what I should do!

    No, really, I’m so anti-drama that I will rarely even watch the internet skirmishes from the sidelines. Most of the time I miss them altogether and only hear about them later, and I kind of like it that way. I tend to believe everyone because if you look in the dictionary under gullible you’ll see my picture. Then I get my feelers all hurt and nobody wants to see that!

  17. Seals says:

    Turns out a lot of people we meet on the Internet are just fucking delusional. IMHO 🙂

  18. Sarah says:

    I deal with far too much shit in real life to notice it on blogs most of the time. But then I live in a little bubble where I think everyone is all happy happy joy joy all the time.

  19. Kyra says:

    …So, are you hearing voices, then?

    Blog wars, I stay out of. Causes, I am skeptical and cautious… but I’ve been burned on a couple of those too. Attacks, are just bizarre in my experience. They bother me, more than they should. But my favorite was when the person was a regular, and accidentally left her email in the comment that was supposed to be anon. I actually got to confront that one, and hear that she had no idea why she did what she did, and it was just a bad day.

    I’m working on trying to view those attacks as people who really need a break because they’re having a really bad day and if I only knew all the details I would probably feel bad for them. But I’m doing it for me, and not them since the whole thing bothers me when it happens.

  20. Nope, that’s not proof of anything. You just keep being the same awesome you and don’t let any of this stuff get you down. At least, that’s the advice I give myself in the same situations.

  21. Brandon says:

    This is why I don’t get involved in any way and I keep my blog very bland and boring.

  22. Rest assured, that last week, when someone hacked my listing on the martial arts toplist and put that my name was “ilovedyk,” it was completely unprovoked and malicious. I would appreciate any smackdown help you can provide including finding the a-hole culprit. Lately, I’ve been finding myself the target of some crap and it’s mostly because someone stole my stuff, I called them on it, and now they’re pissed. So feel sorry for me. Completely innocent and I need a team of ninja’s to take out the jerks. 😉

    I guess the difference between me and those who blog about it, is that I didn’t want everyone to know about it so I didn’t write a big post about it. I wanted to recruit my team of assassins in private. 😉

  23. John says:

    I love “insight” posts like this one. Especially from viper bloggers. : )

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