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Pizzalogy

Posted on Thursday, August 11th, 2005

Dave!As I came off the bridge and rounded the corner, I saw a girl pulled over by an undercover policeman. She was crying her head off as the officer wrote her up, which I found funny for some reason. What a bastard I am. Thirty minutes later, as I drove back home to pick up my luggage, the policeman was long gone, but the girl was still sitting in her car there, red-faced and crying. I'm assuming that it was just a speeding ticket, which begs the question: if getting a ticket is going to cause you to sob uncontrollably for a half-hour, then why exceed the speed limit? Why risk it? Seems pretty stupid to me.

The three hour drive to Spokane (pronounced Spoh-can) was uneventful. It's always uneventful because there's nothing very interesting between Cashmere and Spokane. Just scrub brush, fields of wheat, and wide-open spaces. The speed limit is 70mph, but should be 100mph, because there's nothing to hit along the way.

When I finally get to Spokane, I do not pass go, do not collect $200, do not check into my hotel, do not even stop for the bathroom... I drive directly to David's Pizza, which makes the 3-hour drive actually worth the trouble...

David's Pizza

Unfortunately, they only had one slice of Da Vinci pizza left, so I had to get a slice of cheese to go with it. And, of course, a bottle of Stewart's Orange n' Cream soda...

David's Pizza

For those who are curious, the Da Vinci has Mozzerella and Feta cheeses, with basil pesto sauce and fresh tomatoes. I haven't confirmed it yet, but I'm pretty sure they sprinkle crack cocaine on there as well. It would explain my addiction to the stuff.

But telling you what's ON it doesn't fully explain how it TASTES. Which is amazing. I've been around the world a dozen times, eaten a lot of pizza over the years, and a slice of Da Vinci is the best it can get. Each bite is like that feeling you get when a nice tequila buzz just starts to set in... that kind of deliriously happy high you get when your mind starts to float away, but you're not quite drunk yet.

Followed by three orgasms and a full-body massage.

Yeah, it's pretty good stuff. If you're ever in Spokane, you'd be pretty darn stupid not to drop by the corner of Hamilton and Boone to have a slice. I'll be eating there again for lunch and dinner tomorrow, and would probably go back for breakfast if they were open that early.

Movie Quotable of the Day: "He's not a President... he's an ordinary person. I can kill an ordinary person."
Day-Before-Yesterday's Answer: Weekend at Bernie's (1989) with Andrew McCarthy and Jonathan Silverman.

Categories: Food 2005, Travel 2005Click To It: Permalink
   

Comments

  1. Brandon says:

    I have never eaten at David’s, I will have to try it the next time I am in Spokanistan. We are very partial to the cheese sticks at The Onion downtown. There is nothing like fried cheese and they do it better than anyone we have come across. We also love Tomato Street up by the mall.

  2. Patrick says:

    Holy crap, that Pizza slice looks fantastic. I think I have to make it myself this weekend! Even greater when my is is a vegetarian, so she can enjoy it too.

    I feel sorry for the slice on the right…it’s like putting Janet Reno beside Liz Hurley :)

  3. Anthony says:

    Dammit Dave, I’m so freaking hungry now after seeing that entry. It’s only mid-morning here so I really shouldn’t be craving pizza. Could be because I’m slightly hungover too.

  4. xtine says:

    What I liked most about your pizza entry is the picture of the sign. ‘David’s Full Service Pizza’ which got me thinking, what would ‘self service’ pizza be like? or for that matter ‘mini service’?

  5. Dave2 says:

    Brandon: Ah yes, The Onion is great, isn’t it? I’ve not been to Tomato Street before, but if I’m in the mood for Italian I’d be going back to David’s Pizza… so unless I move here, I probably won’t have a chance any time soon! :-)

    Patrick: Not only does the slice of cheese look like Janet Reno compared to Elizabeth Hurley, I’m pretty sure it TASTES like Janet Reno compared to Elizabeth Hurley!

    Anthony: Hung over? Wait a second… were you with the group of idiots partying in the hotel room beneath me until 2:00am?? :-)

    Xtine: I think that David’s Pizza is located in an old gas station building… they kind of play off the “gas station motif” in the design of the place. And they do actually bring your pizza to your table when it’s done (as opposed to calling your number and making you come and get it), so I guess it really is full service too?

  6. SJ says:

    Holy moly, that must be DAMN good pizza!!!

    Being me, however, what I really want to know is: Just how many times in your life have you experienced three orgasms followed by a full body massage, while on a nice tequila buzz? Because that’s setting a pretty high standard for a non-chocolate-containing food to live up to.

  7. Dave2 says:

    Once. Though the full body massage wasn’t at the end… it was in-between #2 and #3.

    I used artistic license to alter the timing of events for dramatic effect. Wasn’t that clever?

  8. Kevin says:

    Does this pizza place know how much you rave about them? Do they realize you have a blog with the readership that you do? Maybe you can work out a “Dave’s discount” so you (and they) can discover just how many people go there as a result of your post.

    On a totally unrelated note, Betty White was on The Ellen Show this morning. You can probably TiVo it tonight when it’s replayed. Just thought I’d give you a head’s up. I didn’t know about it until the airing here in the Midwest was already halfway through. Sorry, or I would’ve taped it for you. Yes, archaic I know. VHS… God forbid.

  9. Dave2 says:

    Yeah… the manager wrote to me last year. Turns out he went to school in my home town of Cashmere, and was even in my brother’s grade. Small world.

    I used to be the #1 Google hit for “David’s Pizza”, though their own web site has the spot now (as it should be).

  10. lizriz says:

    I suspect the speeding ticket was the straw that broke the camel’s back on her day.

    I feel bad for her; I’ve been there.

    And DAMN that pizza looks good.

  11. benny says:

    Hey!

    I worked @ David’s for a few years,
    pretty much everything about that place
    is friggin’ sweet!
    But i’ll give it to ya’
    I live in Eugene, and if i get the cravy,
    I’ll drive 8 hours for some DaVinci or a phatty slice of Maple Street Bridge (all meat and all veg’s).
    Good blog…

  12. Matty says:

    pfft thanks man..now im dieing for a peice of pizza thats half way across the world. unless they have a davids pizza in australia but i somehow doubt they do. maybe you can email me some?

  13. mistertwilight says:

    Hey! I’m such a huge fan of David’s that I have a large oil painting of John Belushi that is sort of permanently on loan to the establishment. It’s right next to Gonzaga so I figured THE Animal from Animal House would be right at home there with all the college kids that frequent the place.
    Good to meet a fellow David’s fan!

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